Understanding Others by Demonstration and Confirmation
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Gordon White discusses how listening with the intention to understand is the most fundamental requirement for understanding others in difficult situations.
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Beyond Compliance
The document discusses gaining willing cooperation from others beyond just mere compliance. It states that an effective leader can enlist willing cooperation by being cooperative themselves and considering the needs of the team. It then outlines twelve principles from Dale Carnegie's book on human relations that can help gain greater cooperation, such as avoiding arguments, seeing other perspectives, appealing to nobler motives, and challenging others in a positive way. The principles are meant to encourage innovation, cooperation and better results by tapping into the energy and intelligence of a team.
OB Report
This document provides an overview of three topics related to organizational behavior: diversity, emotions and moods, and work teams. For diversity, it defines surface-level and deep-level diversity and explains how initial differences can diminish over time as deep-level similarities are discovered. For emotions and moods, it defines emotions and moods, discusses their effects on decision-making and job performance, and explains emotional labor. For work teams, it defines teams and their stages of development, from forming to adjourning, and emphasizes that effective teams have clearly defined goals and a shared commitment to processes and outcomes.
HBRs 10 Must Reads on Change Management The Real Reason People.docx
HBR's 10 Must Reads on Change Management: The Real Reason People Won't Change
The Real Reason People Won’t Change
by Robert Kegan and Lisa Laskow Lahey
EVERY MANAGER IS FAMILIAR with the employee who just won’t change. Sometimes it’s easy to see why—the employee fears a shift in power, the need to learn new skills, the stress of having to join a new team. In other cases, such resistance is far more puzzling. An employee has the skills and smarts to make a change with ease, has shown a deep commitment to the company, genuinely supports the change—and yet, inexplicably, does nothing.
What’s going on? As organizational psychologists, we have seen this dynamic literally hundreds of times, and our research and analysis have recently led us to a surprising yet deceptively simple conclusion. Resistance to change does not reflect opposition, nor is it merely a result of inertia. Instead, even as they hold a sincere commitment to change, many people are unwittingly applying productive energy toward a hidden competing commitment. The resulting dynamic equilibrium stalls the effort in what looks like resistance but is in fact a kind of personal immunity to change.
When you, as a manager, uncover an employee’s competing commitment, behavior that has seemed irrational and ineffective suddenly becomes stunningly sensible and masterful—but unfortunately, on behalf of a goal that conflicts with what you and even the employee are trying to achieve. You find out that the project leader who’s dragging his feet has an unrecognized competing commitment to avoid the even tougher assignment—one he fears he can’t handle—that might come his way next if he delivers too successfully on the task at hand. Or you find that the person who won’t collaborate despite a passionate and sincere commitment to teamwork is equally dedicated to avoiding the conflict that naturally attends any ambitious team activity.
In these pages, we’ll look at competing commitments in detail and take you through a process to help your employees overcome their immunity to change. The process may sound straightforward, but it is by no means quick or easy. On the contrary, it challenges the very psychological foundations upon which people function. It asks people to call into question beliefs they’ve long held close, perhaps since childhood. And it requires people to admit to painful, even embarrassing, feelings that they would not ordinarily disclose to others or even to themselves. Indeed, some people will opt not to disrupt their immunity to change, choosing instead to continue their fruitless struggle against their competing commitments.
As a manager, you must guide people through this exercise with understanding and sensitivity. If your employees are to engage in honest introspection and candid disclosure, they must understand that their revelations won’t be used against them. The goal of this exploration is solely to help them become more effective, not to find flaws in their work or character ...
AOBM Resolving Issues
This presentation provides guidance on resolving issues with virtual team members. It recommends directly and compassionately addressing problems sooner rather than later through open communication. The presenter advises listening to understand other perspectives, finding collaborative solutions, and establishing agreements and follow-ups to ensure understanding and progress. The goal is to treat people with kindness, respect, and inclusion to build strong, supportive teams.
LEAD WITH FEEDBACK: TWO ESSENTIAL TIPS FOR HOW TO GIVE IT
How do you give feedback in ways that get people to actually listen and change? It’s not a new challenge in leadership circles. Every leader we work with, all over the world and at every level of management, struggles with it:
Constructive Confrontation
The document discusses constructive confrontation, which is a problem-solving technique where individuals directly challenge ideas to improve decisions. It notes that confrontation does not mean being rude, but rather attacking problems, not people. The document provides tips for embracing disagreement, including not shutting down debate when ideas are challenged and speaking directly to issues. It also discusses what makes confrontation difficult, such as fears of looking stupid or damaging relationships. Overall, the document advocates for incorporating constructive confrontation into discussions to deepen relationships and find better solutions.
Frankfinn Presentation on Personality Development -Distinction by Hricha Dhungel
This document is a presentation on personality development submitted by Hricha Dhungel to her teacher Mr. Jaidev Singh Jolly. It includes sections on acknowledgements, introduction, and 4 learning objectives that discuss improving personality, time management, leadership factors, communication barriers, and developing moral values. The presentation provides examples and explanations for each objective to effectively summarize the key points around developing interpersonal skills and personality.
The Power of Teams
The document provides guidance on building effective teams. It discusses the importance of self-awareness and communication between team members. Various exercises and models are presented to help teams develop, including using the "Stinky Fish" exercise to openly share concerns, the "Johari Window" model to understand self-perception, and providing constructive feedback. The stages of team development and the leader's role in guiding the team through each stage are also examined.
7 Steps to Giving Effective Feedback
Effective leaders transform performance with well-delivered, effective feedback. Here are 7 steps from the coach's playbook so you too can give feedback that transforms performance and gets results.
Research Paper Final
This document summarizes a capstone project on the importance of intentionality in organizations. It argues that intentionality is vital for organizational success and defines intentionality as acting with purpose and reason. It discusses how intentionality should be implemented in an organization's structure, leadership, and employees. It provides examples of how lack of intentionality can lead to failure or mediocrity. Overall, the document advocates that intentional planning and goal-setting are necessary for an organization to thrive.
Performance Based Interviewing (PBI) Questions
Recommended in Laslo Bock's book Work Rules
Provided by US Dept. of Veteran Affairs
Source: http://www.va.gov/pbi/questions.asp
Reference from INC Magazine: http://www.inc.com/jessica-stillman/google-s-hr-boss-use-these-interview-questions.html
LISTEN & LEARN from each other
Inside Out Action 雞毛掃行動 presents
LISTEN & LEARN from each other ... helping us get through our turbulent times
We will get through our turbulent times by supporting each other and SHARING resources with each other. Build habits to create new / better opportunities and stronger communities!
Contact us to co-create a sustainable wellness culture in organizations and communities!
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L.E.A.D - SAILco 14
This document discusses leadership and building synergy within a team. It provides steps to create synergy such as defining team goals, setting meetings to discuss plans, and regularly checking on progress. Building synergy requires shared vision, good leadership, trust, and a positive environment. It encourages imagining how to achieve results together and developing oneself through leadership.
XXX1QuestionsMindfulness ActivityObserve.docx
XXX
1
Questions
Mindfulness Activity
Observe
Imagine that within you is a spiral staircase. Winding down to your very center. Starting at the top, walk very slowly down the staircase, going deeper and deeper within yourself.
Today’s mindfulness activity is an observe activity. You are going to imagine that within you is a spiral staircase which winds down the very center of your being. Starting at the top, walk very slowly down the staircase, going deeper and deeper within yourself. Everyone get into your mindful posture, feet flat on the floor, eyes closed, hands in an open position. Take a deep breath in, and out, and begin.
3
Developing Interpersonal Effectiveness Skills
Lesson 10
(DeCano & Cook, 2015)
Today we will be talking about things you can actively do to seek out connection and support – this is highly relevant to resilience because healthy attachments and connections is one of the keys to resilience.
5
Summary of the Previous Lesson
Emotions represent subjective experience that combines bodily and cognitive reactions, are designed to provide us feedback, and motivate specific types of behavior or action
Emotions are functionally adaptive
Negative emotions narrow and positive emotions broaden
To have resilience we must manage intense negative emotions and cultivate positive emotions
To review from last week, emotions represent a complex, subjective experience. Emotions are adaptive and can broaden our attention and resources, but in order to have resilience it’s really important to both learn to manage negative emotions as well as cultivating positive emotions.
6
Summary of the Previous Lesson
Intense negative emotions can be managed two different ways:
If in a crisis – emotional temperature > 65 – then use crisis survival skills:
TIPP
Distract with ACCEPTS
IMPROVE the Moment
Pro & Cons
If not a crisis < 65 then use:
Check the Facts and then Opposite Action or Problem Solving
Positive self-talk
Mindfulness of current emotion: Wave Skill
When we are trying to manage negative emotions, we have learned options for skills to use when we are in a crisis (over 65 on our emotional thermometer) as well as skills to use when we are not in a crisis (less than 65 on the emotional thermometer).
7
Learning Objectives
After completing this lesson, you will be able to:
Understand the need for effective communication in relationships
Know the difference between three key effective communication skills and when you would use each one
Use all three communication skills
Today’s lesson is about developing interpersonal effectiveness. After today, you are going to have a better understanding of the need for effective communication in relationships, and, you’ll know the difference between three key communication skills and when to use each.
8
Lesson 10: Glossary TermsDeveloping Interpersonal Effectiveness SkillsObjective EffectivenessThe interpersonal strategy to effectively ask for the things you want and/or t ...
XXX1QuestionsMindfulness ActivityObserve.docx
XXX
1
Questions
Mindfulness Activity
Observe
Imagine that within you is a spiral staircase. Winding down to your very center. Starting at the top, walk very slowly down the staircase, going deeper and deeper within yourself.
Today’s mindfulness activity is an observe activity. You are going to imagine that within you is a spiral staircase which winds down the very center of your being. Starting at the top, walk very slowly down the staircase, going deeper and deeper within yourself. Everyone get into your mindful posture, feet flat on the floor, eyes closed, hands in an open position. Take a deep breath in, and out, and begin.
3
Developing Interpersonal Effectiveness Skills
Lesson 10
(DeCano & Cook, 2015)
Today we will be talking about things you can actively do to seek out connection and support – this is highly relevant to resilience because healthy attachments and connections is one of the keys to resilience.
5
Summary of the Previous Lesson
Emotions represent subjective experience that combines bodily and cognitive reactions, are designed to provide us feedback, and motivate specific types of behavior or action
Emotions are functionally adaptive
Negative emotions narrow and positive emotions broaden
To have resilience we must manage intense negative emotions and cultivate positive emotions
To review from last week, emotions represent a complex, subjective experience. Emotions are adaptive and can broaden our attention and resources, but in order to have resilience it’s really important to both learn to manage negative emotions as well as cultivating positive emotions.
6
Summary of the Previous Lesson
Intense negative emotions can be managed two different ways:
If in a crisis – emotional temperature > 65 – then use crisis survival skills:
TIPP
Distract with ACCEPTS
IMPROVE the Moment
Pro & Cons
If not a crisis < 65 then use:
Check the Facts and then Opposite Action or Problem Solving
Positive self-talk
Mindfulness of current emotion: Wave Skill
When we are trying to manage negative emotions, we have learned options for skills to use when we are in a crisis (over 65 on our emotional thermometer) as well as skills to use when we are not in a crisis (less than 65 on the emotional thermometer).
7
Learning Objectives
After completing this lesson, you will be able to:
Understand the need for effective communication in relationships
Know the difference between three key effective communication skills and when you would use each one
Use all three communication skills
Today’s lesson is about developing interpersonal effectiveness. After today, you are going to have a better understanding of the need for effective communication in relationships, and, you’ll know the difference between three key communication skills and when to use each.
8
Lesson 10: Glossary TermsDeveloping Interpersonal Effectiveness SkillsObjective EffectivenessThe interpersonal strategy to effectively ask for the things you want and/or t.
Introduction to Coaching
The document discusses attending a coaching workshop where participants' feelings at the start varied from energized to apprehensive. It emphasizes the importance of managing emotions, as negative emotions can hinder performance. Coaching models like GROW were discussed, focusing on setting goals and taking action. Participants struggled most with defining specific, measurable goals and follow-up actions. The document also covers using a "Wheel of Life" tool to rate satisfaction in life areas and set goals to improve the lowest-rated section.
Interview TwoExplain your approach to maintaining high stand.docx
Interview Two
Explain your approach to maintaining high standards and improving poor performance in a team.
I think the key is to hone in one the strengths and weaknesses of the team. See what works for each member and play to those things. As a group, working together may be a hard task, but is an essential key to completion of the main goal of the group. Communication is another major component of improving performance. On both levels, it is important everyone respectfully acknowledges corrective criticism.
How do you deal with difficult customers?
With difficult customers it is important that you listen to understand and not listen to respond. An angry or irate customer does not like too much back and forth conversation without much action. Be apologetic for the circumstances beyond your control do what you can within your level of ability and IF you can go the extra mile, it is important to do so. We have all been on the other side, so it is important to view every situation from the standpoint and ask, what would I have wanted to be done for myself?
Research Question
What is the impact of leadership style on employee's job satisfaction?
Team conflict management/ Team Communication
Resolving Team Conflict
· Prepare for Resolution
· Acknowledge the conflict
· Discuss the impact
· Agree to a cooperative process
· Agree to communicate
Understand the Situation
· Clarify positions
· List facts, assumptions and beliefs underlying each position
· Analyze in smaller groups
· Convene back as a team
· Reach Agreement
Team Communication
· Cohesiveness
· Sharing
· Professional Development
When a team is having conflict you have to acknowledge the issue in order to resolve the problem; by acknowledging the issue you will be able discuss the impact that the conflict is having on the group. Everyone in the group should agree to cooperate with finding a solution to end the conflict in order to get the group’s mission accomplished. In order for the process to work everyone will need to keep the line of communication open, with an open line of communication the team will need to come to an understanding of what the conflict is about. Everyone will not have the same perspective, so everyone should at least respect and acknowledge each of the team members’ opinions. Take everyone’s input and list facts, assumptions and beliefs underlying each position; once this is broken down go into smaller groups and analyze and dissect each position presented. By considering the facts, assumptions, beliefs and decision making that lead to other people's positions, the group will gain a better understanding of those positions. After the group dialogue, each side is likely to be much closer to reaching agreement. Now that all parties understand the others' positions, the team must decide what decision or course of action to take. With the facts and assumptions considered, it's easier to see the best action to take and reach an agreement. After reaching an agreem.
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LEAD WITH FEEDBACK: TWO ESSENTIAL TIPS FOR HOW TO GIVE IT
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Frankfinn Presentation on Personality Development -Distinction by Hricha Dhungel
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Understanding Others by Demonstration and Confirmation
- 2. I build, strengthen, and restore working relationships and team dynamism in organizations. My blog theconflictjourney.com highlights my journey and provides insightful perspectives and practical strategies to the general public for achieving effective responses to conflict. I seek out a deeper meaning of the conflict experience, and what it offers for both individual and organizational growth.Gordon White Principal, Gordon White Consulting Mediator Blogger
- 3. is the most fundamental requirement for understanding others in difficult situations. Listening with the intention to understand INTRO
- 4. CHALLENGES But maintainingthis positive intention is challenging
- 5. Foremost, an intention is abstract CHALLENGES which makes it very difficult for most of us to monitor
- 6. Secondly, our internal reactivity CHALLENGES interferes with our positive intention to understand
- 7. ACTIONS that will contribute to better understanding others Here are two very concrete actions
- 8. ACTION # 1 Demonstratethat you are listening Periodically check in with the other person Say “I would like to be sure I understand you” Then summarize the other person’s perspective
- 9. ACTION # 1 If you don’t hit the mark, they may correct you. That’s okay!
- 10. ACTION # 2 Confirmyour understanding Explicitly ask “How well do I understand?” If the other person says “You understand,” move forward If they say “Not very well,” ask “What don’t I understand?” After they reply, return to Action # 1
- 11. WHY? Why is this important?
- 12. WHY? Why is this important? There is a fundamental human need to be known and understood Conflict usually threatens understanding Action 1 and Action 2 move situations forward
- 13. IN SUMMARY To actualize your intention to understand: Demonstrate your listening Confirm your understanding
- 14. WANT MORE? Click to read the full blog post
- 15. CONNECT WITH ME Gordon White Consulting Gordon White Consulting @ValueConflict GCWhite@telus.net