Trauma, Grief and Loss
Presented by: Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes, PhD, LPC-MHSP, LMHC
Executive Director, AllCEUs Counseling Continuing Education
Host: Counselor Toolbox Podcast
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 1
Objectives
 Conceptualize grief in terms of the response to
any loss
 Identify the 10 core concepts for understanding
trauma
 Identify how failure to deal with grief can impact
a person
 Explore the stages of grief
 Review activities and interventions to help people
grieve
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 2
What is Grief
 Grief is a label assigned to all of the emotions associated with dealing
with any kind of loss
 Physical (Things, abilities, freedoms)
 Self-concept (Roles, values, labels)
 Worldview (Innocence, safety)
 Dreams (How things should be)
 Social (Loss of relationships…)
 Trauma is a psychological, emotional and behavioral response to an
event or an experience that is deeply distressing or disturbing
 Not all losses are traumatic but all traumas involve loss
 To help people accommodate to their “new normal” we must
understand how the trauma/loss impacts them on a biopsychosocial
basis
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 3
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #1 Traumatic experiences are complex
 Emotional: Depression, anxiety, resentment, guilt,
anger
 Physical: Sleep, HPA-Axis, pain, GI symptoms
 Interpersonal: Dependency, withdrawal, distrust,
jealousy
 Spiritual: Anger at HP, sense of disconnection, loss of
meaning, loss of direction
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 4
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #2 Traumatic occurs within the context that includes the
individual’s personal characteristics, life experiences and
current circumstances
 Prior stressors in the last 6 months (Physical, emotional,
interpersonal, environmental)
 Mental health issues
 Cognitive developmental stage (all-or-nothing; egocentrism;
concrete or formal operational; comparative experiences)
 Ability to meet biological and safety needs
 Social support
 Proximity to a “safe” space
 Current coping skills and tools
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 5
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #3 Traumatic events often generate secondary
adversities, life changes, and distressing reminders in
people’s daily lives
 Housing changes
 Physical illnesses or injuries
 Sleep difficulties
 Mood changes
 Shame, guilt, anger
 Loss of significant people or things
 Visual, auditory and olfactory reminders that trigger
flashbacks or strong emotional reactions
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 6
Core concepts cont…
 These secondary losses/adversities also need to
be acknowledged and grieved.
 Loss of a part of ourselves
 Loss of identity
 Loss of self confidence
 Loss of a chosen lifestyle
 Loss of security or a sense of safety
 Loss of dreams
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 7
Core concepts cont…
 What secondary losses/adversities might occur for
these events?
 Death of a parent
 Separation or divorce
 Miscarriages
 Injury or disability
 Moving to a new place (military children)
 Being placed in foster care
 House fire/tornado/flood/hurricane
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 8
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #4 People exhibit a wide range of reactions to trauma/loss
 Grief Reactions
Denial: Numbness, dream, alternate explanations
Anger/Anxiety: The unknown, loss of control, death,
isolation, shame/failure—(shouldas and couldas),
resentment, jealousy
Bargaining: If I … then I will wake up and realize this was
only a really bad dream
Depression: Helpless, hopeless
Acceptance: Radical acceptance that the loss occurred
and determining how to proceed from there
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 9
Core concepts cont…
 #4 People exhibit a wide range of reactions to trauma
and loss
 Posttraumatic stress
 Disruption of attachment and/or peer relationships
 Problems with emotional regulation
 Aggression/irritability
 Withdrawal or constant immersion in relationships
 Reduced level of functioning at home, at school/work, and
in the community.
 Exacerbation of preexisting mental health or addiction
problems
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 10
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #5 Safety is a core concern
 Trauma can:
Magnify concerns about dangers
Make it more difficult to distinguish between safe and
unsafe situations
 Placing people in physically safe circumstances may not
be sufficient to alleviate their fears or restore their
disrupted sense of safety and security (B&E, cancer,
DV)
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 11
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #6 Traumatic experiences affect the family and
broader caregiving systems
 Family members’ or social supports’ own distress can
impair their ability to support the traumatized person
 This compounds the survivor’s reduced sense of
protection and security
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 12
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #7 Trauma and post-trauma adversities can
strongly influence development (even in adults)
 Regressive behavior
 Reluctance, or inability to participate in
developmentally appropriate activities
 For children, developmental accelerations such as
leaving home at an early age and engagement in
precocious sexual behavior.
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 13
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #8 Neurobiology underlies reactions to traumatic
experiences
 Capacities to appraise and respond to danger are linked
to the HPA-Axis
 This “threat response system” controls
Appraisals of dangerous situations
Emotional and physical reactions
Protective actions
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89
14
Core concepts cont…
 #8 Neurobiology underlies reactions to traumatic
experiences
 Traumatic experiences evoke strong biological
responses that can persist and, in children, alter brain
development
 The neurobiological impact of traumatic experiences
depends in part on:
The developmental stage in which they occur.
The number and intensity of traumatic experiences
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89
15
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #9 Challenges to the social contract, including legal and
ethical issues, affect trauma response and recovery
 Traumatic experiences often constitute a major violation of the
expectations of the child, family, community, and higher power
 Survivors are often acutely aware of whether justice is
properly served and the social contract is upheld
 The perceived success or failure of these institutional
responses may exert a profound influence on the course of
people’s post-trauma adjustment, and on their evolving
beliefs, attitudes, and values regarding family, work, and
civic life (B&E, DV, cancer)
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89
16
10 Core Concepts for Understanding Trauma
 #10 Protective factors can reduce the adverse
impact of trauma.
 High self-esteem
 Self-efficacy
 Possessing a repertoire of adaptive coping skills.
 Positive, secure attachment
 Effective, reliable social support
 A supportive school/work and community environment
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 17
Impact of Unresolved Grief/Trauma
 Most people get stuck in either anger or
depression
 Anger (shoulda, couldas and if onlys)
 At self
 At others
 At higher power
 Depression (Hopelessness, Helplessness—I don’t
now how to go on)
 At self
 At others
 At higher power
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 18
Denial
 Denial, numbing is the mind’s way of protecting people
from what lies ahead.
 Facing the loss
 Understand the events of their lives and reconcile the losses
they have experienced (clarification)
 Anger is the power play
 Break down the walls (Bricks or legos, handball wall, soda cans
with the losses and threats represented)
 Bargaining, Pining
 Mindfulness
 Radical acceptance and living in the And
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 19
Denial
 Depression, Disorganization and Despair
 Address hopelessness and helplessness by focusing on
what can be changed
Death Disappearance
Loss Nothing will ever be okay again
Failure Failure at everything
Bad thing happens It has to happen again
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 20
Denial
 Acceptance/Reorganization
 Redefine worldview integrating new experiences and
strengths
 Visualize a positive future
Who am I? (Identity)
Where am I going? (Vision of a RML)
Who is with me? /What are my resources (Supports)
How will I get there? (Goals)
How will I know when I have arrived? (Claiming and safety)
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 21
Not a Linear Process
 Most people experience reactions surrounding a
traumatic loss for at least a year.
 Holidays
 Anniversaries
 Reminders (people, places, things, media)
 Many people will vacillate between depression and
anger.
 Normalize people’s experiences
 Encourage them to reach out to supports
 Address happiness and survivor guilt (death, DV)
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 22
Self Care for Grief
 Emotionally
 Express feelings
 Ask for and accept help
 Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel—and don’t tell yourself
how you “should” feel
 Be patient
 Be kind to yourself
 Add happiness triggers
 Be aware of your grief triggers
 Embrace the dialectic
 It is gone but I have the memories/what I learned
 I cannot change it but I can impact how it continues to impact
me
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 23
Self Care for Grief
 Physically
 Get plenty of quality rest
How to handle being alone with your thoughts….
 Exercise
 Eat a healthy diet
 Avoid alcohol
 Pay attention to persistent changes in eating, sleeping,
mood or energy levels
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 24
Self Care for Grief
 Psychologically
 Write things down
 Simplify
 Set short term goals
 Distract/engage in pleasurable activities
 Start writing the next chapter in your story
 Plan ahead for grief triggers
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 25
Self-Care for Grief
 Interpersonally
 Rebuild relationships (even understand they can be
members of more than one family)
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 26
Activities
 Heart-Break Pot (break into large pieces)
 Using paint pens and markers, have each family
member or child write on the inside of the broken
pieces.
 Instruct them to identify their feelings about being
alone in their grief.
 On the outside of the pieces write about or draw their
sources of support.
 Glue back together
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59
27
Activities
 Jenga (cards)/Beach Ball/Worksheets/
 My favorite memory is…
 The hardest part of the loss is…
 Something I learned about myself/the situation…
 Something I did to make myself laugh this week was…
 May supportive people are…
 2 things that help me most right now…
 The hardest time of day is…
 When I am alone, I can…
 Some things I enjoy…
 Changes in my family because of the loss…
 I am feeling…
 3 ways to release feelings of sadness…
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 28
Summary
 Losses encompass more than death or a person or loss of
property
 Losses can be traumatic
 Failure to acknowledge losses and deal with the traumatic
reactions can cause problems in similar future situations
 It is important to explore feelings and reactions in terms
of their functionality---how are they benefitting the
person
 It takes at least a year to deal with significant losses
 Many times there are multiple ancillary losses that need
to be addressed
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 29
Summary
 How people deal with grief and loss varies widely.
 After a traumatic loss, the body is on high alert which
likely impacts sleep, eating and energy to work or
socialize
 Minimizing vulnerabilities is important to reduce
unnecessary frustration and avoid confirming helplessness
 Ultimately it is hoped that the person can identify how
they are stronger or better off from the experience
AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 30

Trauma grief and loss

  • 1.
    Trauma, Grief andLoss Presented by: Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes, PhD, LPC-MHSP, LMHC Executive Director, AllCEUs Counseling Continuing Education Host: Counselor Toolbox Podcast AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 1
  • 2.
    Objectives  Conceptualize griefin terms of the response to any loss  Identify the 10 core concepts for understanding trauma  Identify how failure to deal with grief can impact a person  Explore the stages of grief  Review activities and interventions to help people grieve AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 2
  • 3.
    What is Grief Grief is a label assigned to all of the emotions associated with dealing with any kind of loss  Physical (Things, abilities, freedoms)  Self-concept (Roles, values, labels)  Worldview (Innocence, safety)  Dreams (How things should be)  Social (Loss of relationships…)  Trauma is a psychological, emotional and behavioral response to an event or an experience that is deeply distressing or disturbing  Not all losses are traumatic but all traumas involve loss  To help people accommodate to their “new normal” we must understand how the trauma/loss impacts them on a biopsychosocial basis AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 3
  • 4.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #1 Traumatic experiences are complex  Emotional: Depression, anxiety, resentment, guilt, anger  Physical: Sleep, HPA-Axis, pain, GI symptoms  Interpersonal: Dependency, withdrawal, distrust, jealousy  Spiritual: Anger at HP, sense of disconnection, loss of meaning, loss of direction AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 4
  • 5.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #2 Traumatic occurs within the context that includes the individual’s personal characteristics, life experiences and current circumstances  Prior stressors in the last 6 months (Physical, emotional, interpersonal, environmental)  Mental health issues  Cognitive developmental stage (all-or-nothing; egocentrism; concrete or formal operational; comparative experiences)  Ability to meet biological and safety needs  Social support  Proximity to a “safe” space  Current coping skills and tools AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 5
  • 6.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #3 Traumatic events often generate secondary adversities, life changes, and distressing reminders in people’s daily lives  Housing changes  Physical illnesses or injuries  Sleep difficulties  Mood changes  Shame, guilt, anger  Loss of significant people or things  Visual, auditory and olfactory reminders that trigger flashbacks or strong emotional reactions AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 6
  • 7.
    Core concepts cont… These secondary losses/adversities also need to be acknowledged and grieved.  Loss of a part of ourselves  Loss of identity  Loss of self confidence  Loss of a chosen lifestyle  Loss of security or a sense of safety  Loss of dreams AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 7
  • 8.
    Core concepts cont… What secondary losses/adversities might occur for these events?  Death of a parent  Separation or divorce  Miscarriages  Injury or disability  Moving to a new place (military children)  Being placed in foster care  House fire/tornado/flood/hurricane AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 8
  • 9.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #4 People exhibit a wide range of reactions to trauma/loss  Grief Reactions Denial: Numbness, dream, alternate explanations Anger/Anxiety: The unknown, loss of control, death, isolation, shame/failure—(shouldas and couldas), resentment, jealousy Bargaining: If I … then I will wake up and realize this was only a really bad dream Depression: Helpless, hopeless Acceptance: Radical acceptance that the loss occurred and determining how to proceed from there AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 9
  • 10.
    Core concepts cont… #4 People exhibit a wide range of reactions to trauma and loss  Posttraumatic stress  Disruption of attachment and/or peer relationships  Problems with emotional regulation  Aggression/irritability  Withdrawal or constant immersion in relationships  Reduced level of functioning at home, at school/work, and in the community.  Exacerbation of preexisting mental health or addiction problems AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 10
  • 11.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #5 Safety is a core concern  Trauma can: Magnify concerns about dangers Make it more difficult to distinguish between safe and unsafe situations  Placing people in physically safe circumstances may not be sufficient to alleviate their fears or restore their disrupted sense of safety and security (B&E, cancer, DV) AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 11
  • 12.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #6 Traumatic experiences affect the family and broader caregiving systems  Family members’ or social supports’ own distress can impair their ability to support the traumatized person  This compounds the survivor’s reduced sense of protection and security AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 12
  • 13.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #7 Trauma and post-trauma adversities can strongly influence development (even in adults)  Regressive behavior  Reluctance, or inability to participate in developmentally appropriate activities  For children, developmental accelerations such as leaving home at an early age and engagement in precocious sexual behavior. AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 13
  • 14.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #8 Neurobiology underlies reactions to traumatic experiences  Capacities to appraise and respond to danger are linked to the HPA-Axis  This “threat response system” controls Appraisals of dangerous situations Emotional and physical reactions Protective actions AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 14
  • 15.
    Core concepts cont… #8 Neurobiology underlies reactions to traumatic experiences  Traumatic experiences evoke strong biological responses that can persist and, in children, alter brain development  The neurobiological impact of traumatic experiences depends in part on: The developmental stage in which they occur. The number and intensity of traumatic experiences AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 15
  • 16.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #9 Challenges to the social contract, including legal and ethical issues, affect trauma response and recovery  Traumatic experiences often constitute a major violation of the expectations of the child, family, community, and higher power  Survivors are often acutely aware of whether justice is properly served and the social contract is upheld  The perceived success or failure of these institutional responses may exert a profound influence on the course of people’s post-trauma adjustment, and on their evolving beliefs, attitudes, and values regarding family, work, and civic life (B&E, DV, cancer) AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 16
  • 17.
    10 Core Conceptsfor Understanding Trauma  #10 Protective factors can reduce the adverse impact of trauma.  High self-esteem  Self-efficacy  Possessing a repertoire of adaptive coping skills.  Positive, secure attachment  Effective, reliable social support  A supportive school/work and community environment AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 17
  • 18.
    Impact of UnresolvedGrief/Trauma  Most people get stuck in either anger or depression  Anger (shoulda, couldas and if onlys)  At self  At others  At higher power  Depression (Hopelessness, Helplessness—I don’t now how to go on)  At self  At others  At higher power AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 18
  • 19.
    Denial  Denial, numbingis the mind’s way of protecting people from what lies ahead.  Facing the loss  Understand the events of their lives and reconcile the losses they have experienced (clarification)  Anger is the power play  Break down the walls (Bricks or legos, handball wall, soda cans with the losses and threats represented)  Bargaining, Pining  Mindfulness  Radical acceptance and living in the And AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 19
  • 20.
    Denial  Depression, Disorganizationand Despair  Address hopelessness and helplessness by focusing on what can be changed Death Disappearance Loss Nothing will ever be okay again Failure Failure at everything Bad thing happens It has to happen again AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 20
  • 21.
    Denial  Acceptance/Reorganization  Redefineworldview integrating new experiences and strengths  Visualize a positive future Who am I? (Identity) Where am I going? (Vision of a RML) Who is with me? /What are my resources (Supports) How will I get there? (Goals) How will I know when I have arrived? (Claiming and safety) AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 21
  • 22.
    Not a LinearProcess  Most people experience reactions surrounding a traumatic loss for at least a year.  Holidays  Anniversaries  Reminders (people, places, things, media)  Many people will vacillate between depression and anger.  Normalize people’s experiences  Encourage them to reach out to supports  Address happiness and survivor guilt (death, DV) AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 22
  • 23.
    Self Care forGrief  Emotionally  Express feelings  Ask for and accept help  Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel—and don’t tell yourself how you “should” feel  Be patient  Be kind to yourself  Add happiness triggers  Be aware of your grief triggers  Embrace the dialectic  It is gone but I have the memories/what I learned  I cannot change it but I can impact how it continues to impact me AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 23
  • 24.
    Self Care forGrief  Physically  Get plenty of quality rest How to handle being alone with your thoughts….  Exercise  Eat a healthy diet  Avoid alcohol  Pay attention to persistent changes in eating, sleeping, mood or energy levels AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 24
  • 25.
    Self Care forGrief  Psychologically  Write things down  Simplify  Set short term goals  Distract/engage in pleasurable activities  Start writing the next chapter in your story  Plan ahead for grief triggers AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 25
  • 26.
    Self-Care for Grief Interpersonally  Rebuild relationships (even understand they can be members of more than one family) AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 26
  • 27.
    Activities  Heart-Break Pot(break into large pieces)  Using paint pens and markers, have each family member or child write on the inside of the broken pieces.  Instruct them to identify their feelings about being alone in their grief.  On the outside of the pieces write about or draw their sources of support.  Glue back together AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 27
  • 28.
    Activities  Jenga (cards)/BeachBall/Worksheets/  My favorite memory is…  The hardest part of the loss is…  Something I learned about myself/the situation…  Something I did to make myself laugh this week was…  May supportive people are…  2 things that help me most right now…  The hardest time of day is…  When I am alone, I can…  Some things I enjoy…  Changes in my family because of the loss…  I am feeling…  3 ways to release feelings of sadness… AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 28
  • 29.
    Summary  Losses encompassmore than death or a person or loss of property  Losses can be traumatic  Failure to acknowledge losses and deal with the traumatic reactions can cause problems in similar future situations  It is important to explore feelings and reactions in terms of their functionality---how are they benefitting the person  It takes at least a year to deal with significant losses  Many times there are multiple ancillary losses that need to be addressed AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 29
  • 30.
    Summary  How peopledeal with grief and loss varies widely.  After a traumatic loss, the body is on high alert which likely impacts sleep, eating and energy to work or socialize  Minimizing vulnerabilities is important to reduce unnecessary frustration and avoid confirming helplessness  Ultimately it is hoped that the person can identify how they are stronger or better off from the experience AllCEUs.com Unlimited CEUs and Specialty Certifications $59 30