This part explains how to maintain healthy intimate relationships based on the principles outlined in the book "The 7 Levels of Intimacy" by Matthew Kelly.
This document provides an overview of forming healthy intimate relationships. It discusses intimacy as involving vulnerability and risk, and not being defined by sex alone. Intimacy is described as having four dimensions: emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and physical. Healthy intimacy involves balancing individuality and togetherness through differentiation - maintaining a clear sense of self even when close to others. The document emphasizes starting intimacy from within by revealing aspects of oneself, and cautions against forcing intimacy or defining relationships solely by physical aspects.
The document describes an intimacy workshop series that will cover topics like the 7 levels of intimacy and how intimacy starts from within as we reveal our authentic selves, rather than through just physical intimacy. The workshops encourage participants to balance their needs for togetherness and individuality in relationships through self-validation and differentiation in order to have healthy intimacy.
Intimacy means open sharing of feelings and wants between you and another person. It is expressing the natural child feeling of warmth, tenderness and closeness to others. Many people suffer from an inability to express such closeness.
This document provides an introduction to Nonviolent Communication (NVC). It discusses the key premises of NVC theory, which are that 1) humans fundamentally desire to enrich life, 2) our language often disguises judgment and blame as the cause of conflicts, and 3) using a needs-based language can help dissolve conflicts by connecting to our shared humanity. NVC offers an alternative paradigm to resolve conflicts through empathetic listening and honest expression of observations, feelings, needs, and requests, rather than judgment, blame, or compromise.
Simple Practical Ways to Overcome Inferiority ComplexNzubeOkoye1
The feeling of inferiority has become a major defeat for many through lack of confidence and self-doubt. This feeling of inadequacy has erected power barriers in some people’s personality that they find it difficult to find and release their God given powers.
The sole objective of the book is to:
help you achieve a happy, satisfying, confident life.
help you gain a shift in your outlook on life.
help you become a person of greater usefulness.
This document discusses inferiority complexes, including their nature, manifestations, and potential cures. It defines an inferiority complex as an abnormal psychological state that leads one to depreciate themselves, seek excessive praise, and view others negatively. An inferiority complex can arise from real or imagined feelings of inferiority compared to others and often stems from parental attitudes, physical defects, mental limitations, or social disadvantages during development. Manifestations include withdrawal behaviors like self-consciousness and sensitivity or aggressive behaviors like attention-seeking and criticism of others. Compensation mechanisms are also discussed as potential ways to adjust to feelings of inferiority, such as denial, distortion, or rationalization of reality.
This document summarizes a staff development workshop on cultivating compassion through nonviolent communication. It discusses how Montessori teachers can act as artists, alchemists and advocates. It then explains the principles of nonviolent communication, which involve observing objectively without judgment, identifying feelings and needs, and making requests to have needs met. The goal is to foster compassionate connections and resolve conflicts through respectful understanding rather than criticism or aggression.
(1) From an external orientation to an internal orientation
(2) Deconstruction of the false beliefs and stories we hold
(3) Feel to heal
(4) Accept our humanness
(5) Integrate our shadows (the parts we disowned)
(6) Be supported by relationships
And a list of day-to-day things we may want to do more of and less of to live a better life!
This document provides an overview of forming healthy intimate relationships. It discusses intimacy as involving vulnerability and risk, and not being defined by sex alone. Intimacy is described as having four dimensions: emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and physical. Healthy intimacy involves balancing individuality and togetherness through differentiation - maintaining a clear sense of self even when close to others. The document emphasizes starting intimacy from within by revealing aspects of oneself, and cautions against forcing intimacy or defining relationships solely by physical aspects.
The document describes an intimacy workshop series that will cover topics like the 7 levels of intimacy and how intimacy starts from within as we reveal our authentic selves, rather than through just physical intimacy. The workshops encourage participants to balance their needs for togetherness and individuality in relationships through self-validation and differentiation in order to have healthy intimacy.
Intimacy means open sharing of feelings and wants between you and another person. It is expressing the natural child feeling of warmth, tenderness and closeness to others. Many people suffer from an inability to express such closeness.
This document provides an introduction to Nonviolent Communication (NVC). It discusses the key premises of NVC theory, which are that 1) humans fundamentally desire to enrich life, 2) our language often disguises judgment and blame as the cause of conflicts, and 3) using a needs-based language can help dissolve conflicts by connecting to our shared humanity. NVC offers an alternative paradigm to resolve conflicts through empathetic listening and honest expression of observations, feelings, needs, and requests, rather than judgment, blame, or compromise.
Simple Practical Ways to Overcome Inferiority ComplexNzubeOkoye1
The feeling of inferiority has become a major defeat for many through lack of confidence and self-doubt. This feeling of inadequacy has erected power barriers in some people’s personality that they find it difficult to find and release their God given powers.
The sole objective of the book is to:
help you achieve a happy, satisfying, confident life.
help you gain a shift in your outlook on life.
help you become a person of greater usefulness.
This document discusses inferiority complexes, including their nature, manifestations, and potential cures. It defines an inferiority complex as an abnormal psychological state that leads one to depreciate themselves, seek excessive praise, and view others negatively. An inferiority complex can arise from real or imagined feelings of inferiority compared to others and often stems from parental attitudes, physical defects, mental limitations, or social disadvantages during development. Manifestations include withdrawal behaviors like self-consciousness and sensitivity or aggressive behaviors like attention-seeking and criticism of others. Compensation mechanisms are also discussed as potential ways to adjust to feelings of inferiority, such as denial, distortion, or rationalization of reality.
This document summarizes a staff development workshop on cultivating compassion through nonviolent communication. It discusses how Montessori teachers can act as artists, alchemists and advocates. It then explains the principles of nonviolent communication, which involve observing objectively without judgment, identifying feelings and needs, and making requests to have needs met. The goal is to foster compassionate connections and resolve conflicts through respectful understanding rather than criticism or aggression.
(1) From an external orientation to an internal orientation
(2) Deconstruction of the false beliefs and stories we hold
(3) Feel to heal
(4) Accept our humanness
(5) Integrate our shadows (the parts we disowned)
(6) Be supported by relationships
And a list of day-to-day things we may want to do more of and less of to live a better life!
Personal relationships are driven by several factors according to research. These include:
1. Homophily - the tendency for people to be attracted to and bond with those similar to themselves.
2. The transference effect - where people immediately feel attraction or disliking towards others due to unconscious associations.
3. The propinquity effect - familiarity and proximity increase attraction as people interact more with those geographically or situationally close to them like neighbors or coworkers.
21 Warning Signs of Unhealthy Intimate RelationshipMoshe Ratson
Here are 21 warning signs of unhealthy dynamics in intimate relationships that can’t be ignored. It is not easy to accept the difficulties in your relationship, but the sooner you face reality, the sooner you can move forward and build healthy fulfilling and lasting relationship.
This document discusses concepts related to anxiety, differentiation, and healthy leadership in religious communities. It notes that chronically anxious church families may splinter off or submit to manipulative power groups. Leaders must recognize resistance as normal and let their own values guide decisions rather than emotional bonds. Differentiation involves thinking clearly, acting on principle, regulating reactions, and choosing responsibility. Healthy leaders tolerate pain to use anxious times creatively and manage their own anxiety rather than accommodating the weakest members. Boundaries must be enforced to prevent harm. The immune system analogy applies - leaders provide healthy struggle around mission and accountability.
this presentation is about Inferiority complex,Inferiority Feelings and Personality. It is based on types of inferiority complex, Causes of inferiority complex,Tests for inferiority complex ,Superiority complex,Causes of superiority complex
Difference between Inferiority & Superiority complex
How to overcome Inferiority complex& how to overcome superiority complex.
This document discusses leadership challenges in anxious congregations. It notes that chronic anxiety can cause small groups to splinter off or a manipulative power group to form. Differentiation is described as the ability to think clearly, act on principle, define oneself, regulate reactions, and make responsible choices. Undifferentiated leaders focus on others' feelings rather than their own. The document provides strategies for leaders to address anxiety, including recognizing resistance as normal, exercising patience, and managing their own anxiety. It also discusses the importance of boundaries, defining the congregation's mission, and avoiding overfunctioning in pastoral care.
Overcoming Shame By Mr. Nilesh Mandlecha
Overcoming Shame
When Socially unacceptable thing has happened with you and people look down at you- How you can deal with this situation is explained in this video.
For info log on to www.healthlibrary.com.
Various unconscious factors that set the stage for the unfolding of relational dynamics that can be distressing, emotionally painful, and highly destructive. The narcissist-codependent bond is a good example of this. I have argued that such dynamics are largely pre-determined and out of our control and awareness, which is why so many people become frustrated at identifying and limiting the negative impact of these dynamics on their lives. Consequently, these dynamics overtake our best efforts at living a healthy, productive life, and tend to cause chronic damage in our romantic lives, careers, friendships, and even in relation to our own self-care and self-esteem. In this talk, I present an approach to identifying and taking better control of these dynamics – so that we do not allow them to unfold in their typical insidious fashion. My perspective on interpersonal transformation involves a systematic analysis of what constitutes how we view others and how others view us. I will suggest that how we view and are viewed consist primarily of fabrications that perpetuate a series of emotional and psychological provocations which, ultimately, restrict how we maneuver through and negotiate the social world. How to identify and alter these fabrications is perhaps the most common question that has come up in our groups so far and that is asked by patients who see me individually for psychotherapy.
Inducing and Being Induced: How to Recognize Dysfunctional Relationship DynamicsJames Tobin, Ph.D.
As a species, we are socialized from birth to compromise various aspects of one’s true identity in order to appeal to the primary caregiver. Consequently, we learn how to play roles in relationships very early in development. Yet, role-playing continues into adulthood and even across the lifespan. Every human interaction may be conceptualized from the vantage point of roles, as roles organize emotional experience, the hierarchy of power between individual s and groups, and the execution of tasks. Human relationships, therefore, revolve around inhibitions and resistances to authentic intimacy given that roles provide an architecture of human relatedness and fend off psychological fears and anxieties about closeness. In no other aspect of human life is this most apparent than in romantic relationships. We unconsciously coerce or “induce” others to act in accordance with our role preference, and in turn we are coerced or induced to act in accordance with the role preferences of others. These induced roles quickly set into motion a sequence of interactions that constricts a person’s relational freedom, thus straight jacketing the person into a role that, over time, becomes quite rigid and constraining. Understanding these induction processes, as well as the unconscious longings that generate them, are perhaps the most important keys to having fulfilling, surprising, and viable relationships. In this presentation, I will discuss these induction processes, explain why they are so prevalent, and offer my thoughts on how they may be avoided and/or dissolved.
Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S, Founder and Clinical Director of Center for Healthy Sex, presents a slideshow on Sexual Gridlock between partners.
The Dynamics of Unconscious Communication: Projection, Projective Identificat...James Tobin, Ph.D.
According to Dr. Tobin, communication occurs at an unconscious level and is organized largely around psychological processes that re-create historical events. This talk seeks to clarify how projection and projective identification are relevant in all romantic relationship and engineer patterns of relatedness oriented toward re-traumatization.
Our beliefs drive our behavior and eventually our identity. If you want to change how you parent, you must be willing to look at what you really believe & be willing to change those beliefs. So what do you believe about relating to others?
The document outlines the 4 components of Nonviolent Communication:
1. Observation - A factual description of events using the 5 senses without judgement.
2. Feelings - The physical sensations and emotions arising from an observation.
3. Needs - The universal human requirements for well-being rather than culturally specific wants.
4. Request - A clear, positive action someone can take to fulfill a need, rather than a demand or vague wish.
Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S, Founder and Clinical Director of Center for Healthy Sex, presents a slideshow on Erotic Intelligence, based on her book Erotic Intelligence: Having Hot, Healthy Sex While in Recovery From Sex Addiction
This document discusses achieving erotic intelligence and healthy sexuality. It argues that sexuality is complex and we never fully achieve wholeness, only aspire to healthier sex. True intimacy involves self-knowledge, comfort/connection with others, responsibility, and empathy. Optimal sexuality combines healthy, intimate, erotic and spiritual connection. Erotic intelligence means using reason to have arousal and connection without shame or addiction. Achieving differentiation within close relationships is key to intimacy with self and others.
More psychopaths in suits than you thinkkwaiyukwai
1) Research shows that psychopaths are 4 times more likely to be found in corporate workplaces than on the street.
2) Factors like genetics and one's upbringing can influence whether someone develops psychopathic tendencies, but being a psychopath does not necessarily mean becoming a killer.
3) Corporate culture may reward qualities like charm and risk-taking that psychopaths possess, even if their actual performance is poor, allowing psychopaths to succeed in business.
self esteem actually assessment of our own self- self esteem is the opinion u have of yourself - hig self esteem based on our attitude - qualities of low self esteem - qualities of highself esteem - how exactly we improve our self esteem - appreciate yourself - facts abou t abraham lincoln - helen Keller - Thomas Edison
Free to be me relationship series - part 10 - self acceptance Stacie Otey Scott
This document discusses self-acceptance and the desire to please others. It states that self-acceptance occurs through self-compassion and focusing on positives rather than negatives. While the desire to please is natural and necessary to get needs met as children, some develop an unhealthy need to please others to ensure their acceptance. This can lead to questioning self-worth and exploitation. The document encourages being aware of influences from others and media, and realizing that God accepts us unconditionally through reconciliation in Christ.
Alex Katehakis - Center for Healthy Sex - Erotic Intelligence for Recovering ...Center for Healthy Sex
Based on her book Erotic Intelligence: Igniting hot, healthy sex while in recovery from sex addiction, Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S, walks women through a presentation to help them hone their inner Erotic Intelligence.
This document discusses shame, its origins, and how it relates to addiction. It defines shame as an intensely painful feeling of being flawed and unworthy of love. Shame is normally developed in early childhood through interactions with caregivers. For addicts, shame can drive substance abuse as a means to escape feelings of shame, though this creates an addictive spiral. Overcoming shame requires developing self-compassion and replacing shame with self-affirmation. Therapies aim to help people directly experience and soothe shame through social connection and self-care.
Journeying with Students into Healthy Relationships & SexualityMatthew Martin
WHO: youth pastors, youth workers, and campus leaders
WHAT: We'll will explore why and how teens and young adults are struggling with relationships and sexuality, and how as leaders we can journey with them towards greater wholeness and godliness.
TOPICS
• How and why teens struggle emotionally, relationally and sexually
• What's required for healthy relationships and sexuality?
• Addictive behaviour and relationships, strategies for pursuing health and freedom
• Understanding sexual identity and how to help same-sex attracted teens
• Making your youth group a safer place for hurting teens
• The River: components of a curriculum for Christ-centred healing and wholeness
Personal relationships are driven by several factors according to research. These include:
1. Homophily - the tendency for people to be attracted to and bond with those similar to themselves.
2. The transference effect - where people immediately feel attraction or disliking towards others due to unconscious associations.
3. The propinquity effect - familiarity and proximity increase attraction as people interact more with those geographically or situationally close to them like neighbors or coworkers.
21 Warning Signs of Unhealthy Intimate RelationshipMoshe Ratson
Here are 21 warning signs of unhealthy dynamics in intimate relationships that can’t be ignored. It is not easy to accept the difficulties in your relationship, but the sooner you face reality, the sooner you can move forward and build healthy fulfilling and lasting relationship.
This document discusses concepts related to anxiety, differentiation, and healthy leadership in religious communities. It notes that chronically anxious church families may splinter off or submit to manipulative power groups. Leaders must recognize resistance as normal and let their own values guide decisions rather than emotional bonds. Differentiation involves thinking clearly, acting on principle, regulating reactions, and choosing responsibility. Healthy leaders tolerate pain to use anxious times creatively and manage their own anxiety rather than accommodating the weakest members. Boundaries must be enforced to prevent harm. The immune system analogy applies - leaders provide healthy struggle around mission and accountability.
this presentation is about Inferiority complex,Inferiority Feelings and Personality. It is based on types of inferiority complex, Causes of inferiority complex,Tests for inferiority complex ,Superiority complex,Causes of superiority complex
Difference between Inferiority & Superiority complex
How to overcome Inferiority complex& how to overcome superiority complex.
This document discusses leadership challenges in anxious congregations. It notes that chronic anxiety can cause small groups to splinter off or a manipulative power group to form. Differentiation is described as the ability to think clearly, act on principle, define oneself, regulate reactions, and make responsible choices. Undifferentiated leaders focus on others' feelings rather than their own. The document provides strategies for leaders to address anxiety, including recognizing resistance as normal, exercising patience, and managing their own anxiety. It also discusses the importance of boundaries, defining the congregation's mission, and avoiding overfunctioning in pastoral care.
Overcoming Shame By Mr. Nilesh Mandlecha
Overcoming Shame
When Socially unacceptable thing has happened with you and people look down at you- How you can deal with this situation is explained in this video.
For info log on to www.healthlibrary.com.
Various unconscious factors that set the stage for the unfolding of relational dynamics that can be distressing, emotionally painful, and highly destructive. The narcissist-codependent bond is a good example of this. I have argued that such dynamics are largely pre-determined and out of our control and awareness, which is why so many people become frustrated at identifying and limiting the negative impact of these dynamics on their lives. Consequently, these dynamics overtake our best efforts at living a healthy, productive life, and tend to cause chronic damage in our romantic lives, careers, friendships, and even in relation to our own self-care and self-esteem. In this talk, I present an approach to identifying and taking better control of these dynamics – so that we do not allow them to unfold in their typical insidious fashion. My perspective on interpersonal transformation involves a systematic analysis of what constitutes how we view others and how others view us. I will suggest that how we view and are viewed consist primarily of fabrications that perpetuate a series of emotional and psychological provocations which, ultimately, restrict how we maneuver through and negotiate the social world. How to identify and alter these fabrications is perhaps the most common question that has come up in our groups so far and that is asked by patients who see me individually for psychotherapy.
Inducing and Being Induced: How to Recognize Dysfunctional Relationship DynamicsJames Tobin, Ph.D.
As a species, we are socialized from birth to compromise various aspects of one’s true identity in order to appeal to the primary caregiver. Consequently, we learn how to play roles in relationships very early in development. Yet, role-playing continues into adulthood and even across the lifespan. Every human interaction may be conceptualized from the vantage point of roles, as roles organize emotional experience, the hierarchy of power between individual s and groups, and the execution of tasks. Human relationships, therefore, revolve around inhibitions and resistances to authentic intimacy given that roles provide an architecture of human relatedness and fend off psychological fears and anxieties about closeness. In no other aspect of human life is this most apparent than in romantic relationships. We unconsciously coerce or “induce” others to act in accordance with our role preference, and in turn we are coerced or induced to act in accordance with the role preferences of others. These induced roles quickly set into motion a sequence of interactions that constricts a person’s relational freedom, thus straight jacketing the person into a role that, over time, becomes quite rigid and constraining. Understanding these induction processes, as well as the unconscious longings that generate them, are perhaps the most important keys to having fulfilling, surprising, and viable relationships. In this presentation, I will discuss these induction processes, explain why they are so prevalent, and offer my thoughts on how they may be avoided and/or dissolved.
Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S, Founder and Clinical Director of Center for Healthy Sex, presents a slideshow on Sexual Gridlock between partners.
The Dynamics of Unconscious Communication: Projection, Projective Identificat...James Tobin, Ph.D.
According to Dr. Tobin, communication occurs at an unconscious level and is organized largely around psychological processes that re-create historical events. This talk seeks to clarify how projection and projective identification are relevant in all romantic relationship and engineer patterns of relatedness oriented toward re-traumatization.
Our beliefs drive our behavior and eventually our identity. If you want to change how you parent, you must be willing to look at what you really believe & be willing to change those beliefs. So what do you believe about relating to others?
The document outlines the 4 components of Nonviolent Communication:
1. Observation - A factual description of events using the 5 senses without judgement.
2. Feelings - The physical sensations and emotions arising from an observation.
3. Needs - The universal human requirements for well-being rather than culturally specific wants.
4. Request - A clear, positive action someone can take to fulfill a need, rather than a demand or vague wish.
Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S, Founder and Clinical Director of Center for Healthy Sex, presents a slideshow on Erotic Intelligence, based on her book Erotic Intelligence: Having Hot, Healthy Sex While in Recovery From Sex Addiction
This document discusses achieving erotic intelligence and healthy sexuality. It argues that sexuality is complex and we never fully achieve wholeness, only aspire to healthier sex. True intimacy involves self-knowledge, comfort/connection with others, responsibility, and empathy. Optimal sexuality combines healthy, intimate, erotic and spiritual connection. Erotic intelligence means using reason to have arousal and connection without shame or addiction. Achieving differentiation within close relationships is key to intimacy with self and others.
More psychopaths in suits than you thinkkwaiyukwai
1) Research shows that psychopaths are 4 times more likely to be found in corporate workplaces than on the street.
2) Factors like genetics and one's upbringing can influence whether someone develops psychopathic tendencies, but being a psychopath does not necessarily mean becoming a killer.
3) Corporate culture may reward qualities like charm and risk-taking that psychopaths possess, even if their actual performance is poor, allowing psychopaths to succeed in business.
self esteem actually assessment of our own self- self esteem is the opinion u have of yourself - hig self esteem based on our attitude - qualities of low self esteem - qualities of highself esteem - how exactly we improve our self esteem - appreciate yourself - facts abou t abraham lincoln - helen Keller - Thomas Edison
Free to be me relationship series - part 10 - self acceptance Stacie Otey Scott
This document discusses self-acceptance and the desire to please others. It states that self-acceptance occurs through self-compassion and focusing on positives rather than negatives. While the desire to please is natural and necessary to get needs met as children, some develop an unhealthy need to please others to ensure their acceptance. This can lead to questioning self-worth and exploitation. The document encourages being aware of influences from others and media, and realizing that God accepts us unconditionally through reconciliation in Christ.
Alex Katehakis - Center for Healthy Sex - Erotic Intelligence for Recovering ...Center for Healthy Sex
Based on her book Erotic Intelligence: Igniting hot, healthy sex while in recovery from sex addiction, Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S, walks women through a presentation to help them hone their inner Erotic Intelligence.
This document discusses shame, its origins, and how it relates to addiction. It defines shame as an intensely painful feeling of being flawed and unworthy of love. Shame is normally developed in early childhood through interactions with caregivers. For addicts, shame can drive substance abuse as a means to escape feelings of shame, though this creates an addictive spiral. Overcoming shame requires developing self-compassion and replacing shame with self-affirmation. Therapies aim to help people directly experience and soothe shame through social connection and self-care.
Journeying with Students into Healthy Relationships & SexualityMatthew Martin
WHO: youth pastors, youth workers, and campus leaders
WHAT: We'll will explore why and how teens and young adults are struggling with relationships and sexuality, and how as leaders we can journey with them towards greater wholeness and godliness.
TOPICS
• How and why teens struggle emotionally, relationally and sexually
• What's required for healthy relationships and sexuality?
• Addictive behaviour and relationships, strategies for pursuing health and freedom
• Understanding sexual identity and how to help same-sex attracted teens
• Making your youth group a safer place for hurting teens
• The River: components of a curriculum for Christ-centred healing and wholeness
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage WorkSaadia Z Yunus
This document summarizes key points from a presentation on marriage and family therapy. It discusses how marriage and family therapists treat mental health issues and relationship problems from a family systems perspective. The document also outlines several strategies for building strong, long-lasting marriages according to research from Gottman and Silver, including maintaining a positive view of one's spouse, sharing small moments of connection daily, allowing influence from one's partner, managing solvable vs. perpetual problems effectively, and focusing on shared religious beliefs and purpose.
Sharilynn McIntosh is a motivational speaker who gives presentations on relationships and overcoming rejection. Her presentation "LIVE, LOVE & LAUGH: WHAT RELATIONSHIPS TEACH US & HOW TO AVOID THE RISK OF GETTING HURT" teaches that good relationship choices come from a good relationship with God and shares lessons from successful and failed relationships. She also gives a presentation called "OVERCOMING REJECTION: HOW TO EXPERIENCE RELATIONSHIP SUCCESS" that provides strategies for healing from rejection and cultivating new, positive relationships.
Convocation on Equally yoked - Bible Counseling - Liberal Arts & HumanitiesBillyTODonohue
This document discusses various aspects of personal, social, civil, and family identity. It explores how identities are formed through factors like ethnicity, religion, gender, education level, and family roles. Marriage and relationships are discussed in a biblical context, emphasizing the importance of being "equally yoked". The document provides examples of how identities combine to form a person's overall identity. It also lists some universities and colleges that are suggested for maintaining equally yoked relationships in accordance with biblical teachings.
Understanding Emotional Abuse and the Need for Healing is so important to all people! This event will include breakfast and 12 lessons taken from Therapeutic Application of Biblical Principles for Overcoming Emotional Trauma.
Lesson will include a complete workbook and hands-on training from the Author; Dr. Mary G. Patton:
Building Rapport
Identifying and Facing Issues
Breaking the Silence
Gaining Control of Emotions
Establishing Accountability
Understanding Personality and Behavioral Flaws
Building Support System
To Confront or Not to Confront
Letting Go to Grow
Restoration
Fortifying Your Spiritual Self
Sharing Your Pearls
Value delivered to you through this event is excellent. Cause. Effect. and Cure will be pinpointed through Heal the Hurt Conference.
Understanding Emotional Abuse and the Need for Healing is so important to all people!
This event will include breakfast and 12 lessons taken from Therapeutic Application of Biblical Principles for Overcoming Emotional Trauma.
Lesson will include a complete workbook and hands-on training from the Author; Dr. Mary G. Patton:
Building Rapport
Identifying and Facing Issues
Breaking the Silence
Gaining Control of Emotions
Establishing Accountability
Understanding Personality and Behavioral Flaws
Building Support System
To Confront or Not to Confront
Letting Go to Grow
Restoration
Fortifying Your Spiritual Self
Sharing Your Pearls
Value delivered to you through this event is excellent.
Cause. Effect. and Cure will be pinpointed through Heal the Hurt Conference.
Are you seeking compassionate and effective therapy in Texas to overcome challenges like PTSD, anxiety, and depression? Welcome to Paige Bartholomew's holistic therapy practice, where healing meets empowerment. With a deep understanding of your unique journey, Paige offers specialized treatments, including hypnotherapy and somatic work, to nurture your mind, body, and spirit. Break free from limitations and experience profound transformation on your path to emotional well-being. Discover the power of holistic healing in Texas today.
This document provides an overview of counseling from a Christian perspective. It defines counseling, discusses the role of active listening for counselors, and covers various counseling specialties and types of mental illnesses. It also highlights key differences between Christian and secular counseling, focusing on the biblical foundation of Christian counseling. Ethical issues like dual relationships, exploitation, and maintaining proper boundaries are examined.
Samantha Edu is a licensed professional counselor, speaker, and radio host who advocates for reducing the stigma around mental health. She gives talks on topics like the reality of mental illness, the relationship between church and counseling, and encouraging vulnerability. Her goal is to educate audiences through real-life examples and a engaging presentation style. Feedback from past events has praised her transparency and ability to educate those who were previously skeptical of mental health issues.
The document provides an overview of Bowenian family therapy, outlining Bowen's key concepts including differentiation of self, triangulation, and the multigenerational transmission process. Case examples are used to demonstrate how a Bowenian therapist would assess family dynamics and patterns of reactivity. The goal of treatment is to help family members increase their level of differentiation through techniques such as genograms, role plays, and reframing problems in a multigenerational context.
Discussion response 1 JazThe use of spiritual interventions .docxelinoraudley582231
Discussion response 1: Jaz
The use of spiritual interventions is encouraged in the lectures but the repetitive theme for me was that the counselor must possess at the minimum basic theology competence and you can do more harm than help at times. This is because the inclusion of spiritual interventions should be approached delicately since the counselor must first possess the competence necessary to incorporate Scripture and/or prayer. Also, each client’s situation is different and that may mean at times that the best approach is for the counselor to use spiritual interventions implicitly (McMinn, 2011). The last thing a client needs is to be preached during his or hers counseling sessions, and some may have a broken relationship with God that need repairing. Treating Danielle’s case would be no different and certain guidelines are to be followed. The Scripture can be used with the purpose to help her reach a point where she can see her “sense of need” and for the need to build and/or heal relationships (Brewer & Peters, n.d.). However, it would not be a starting point, as neither would be praying with her given her spiritual development.
As Danielle’s counselor I would definitely pray for her before sessions and silently during sessions. In the lectures it is presented as a safe and powerful intervention, I believe that praying for others is the best-unspoken gift because of the blessing they will receive from God. Secondly, I would want to create a safe space for her by focusing on our therapeutic alliance, since she has experienced a lot of disorder in her environments. I wish to prepare a setting for Danielle where she can explore her emotions, “sense of self,” reach a point where we can work on her “sense of need” and finally work on “healing relationships” (Brewer & Peters, n.d.). Given her fragmented nature right now the last thing I wish to do is to push religion, instead I can be an example of Godly love by allowing the fruit of the spirit to guide my behavior (McMinn, 2011). She can benefit from receiving lots of love, peace, patience, gentleness, faith, goodness, and joy (Galatians 5:22).
As Christian counselors our Spiritual formation is extremely important because it will guide and help us understand when it will be effective and appropriate to use spiritual interventions (McMinn, 2011). Our lectures have coincided when discussing cautionary measures to be kept in mind when counseling clients not interested in or hurt by religion. The points that I found extremely importance is to not impose my beliefs onto my clients, I must be careful on my scriptural interpretation and use in counseling (McMinn, 2011). Second, we must avoid a preaching counseling session we are supposed to be listening to our clients. Lastly, I do not want to over rely on the Bible when other Psychological interventions may be more helpful for the client at that moment (Brewer & Peters, n.d.). I feel that if I remember that not every idea that .
The document describes a self-help ebook called "Defeating Depression" that provides 40 strategies for overcoming depression. It is authored by psychotherapist Sharon Buckingham and priced at $10 to be accessible. The ebook covers flexible methodologies to understand how depression has affected one's life and implement an effective strategy. It integrates various therapeutic techniques to build an action plan for defeating depression once and for all.
Brooke Bickert is a marriage and family therapist with a passion for working with women, adolescents, couples and groups on issues like anxiety, depression, faith, grief, pre-marital relationships. She received her undergraduate degree in psychology and graduate degree in marriage and family therapy from Liberty University. In her free time, she enjoys running, reading and traveling.
The document discusses the basics of counseling for Christian chaplains. It outlines two types of counseling - formal counseling which takes place in a controlled environment, and informal counseling which occurs spontaneously wherever needed. The document recommends contacting counselees at 6 days, 6 weeks, and 6 months after a critical incident or traumatic event as those times often present the hardest challenges in recovery. Core competencies for chaplain counselors include empathy, confidentiality, and directing counselees to God as the ultimate healer.
Pastoral counselling provides spiritual guidance and psychologically sound therapy to help people overcome problems in a biblical way. It combines religious and spiritual dimensions with therapeutic approaches. Pastoral counsellors draw from scripture and integrate theology with behavioral sciences to address issues holistically. Pastoral counselling in schools contributes to student well-being, learning, and character development by providing social and coping skills training through programs like Positive Schools. It uniquely supports teacher resilience to benefit students.
The document provides guidance for avoiding and resolving relational conflicts in marriage. It emphasizes spiritual foundations of being merciful, pure in heart, and a peacemaker. It encourages living out of one's heavenly nature rather than fleshly passions by being filled with the Holy Spirit daily. Specific advice includes getting rid of resentments, limiting retaliation, controlling emotions, practicing tolerance of irritations, focusing on problem-solving rather than blame, and only considering divorce for core issues that undermine the marriage covenant.
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1. How to Form Healthy Intimate
Relationships
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
2. • Former St. Brigid staff pastoral
counselor from 2004-2006.
• Graduate USD with MA in Pastoral
Care & Counseling (2005).
• Graduate Alliant Int’l University with
MA in Marriage & Family Therapy
(2007).
• Currently working as a mental health
counselor in a local agency and
private practice. Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
3. Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
4. “Intimacy is
The recursive experience…
…of open self-confrontation
(vulnerability)…
…of core aspects of the self…
…in the presence of a partner.”
--David Schnarch
Author of Passionate Marriage
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
5. • Balancing (autonomy)
and (relationship)
creates a constant tension.
• A person over-oriented toward
individuality becomes self-absorbed
and set in their ways.
• A person over-oriented toward
togethernessbecomes dependent on
others for a sense of self.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
6. • The ability to validate one’s own
experience/existence…
• …in the face of pressure from the
other/partner…
• …without cutting off…
• …is called self-validated intimacy.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
7. A healthy relationship is formed when
• two people who each have a healthy
sense of their identity…
• …come together willing to regularly
and openly confront their authentic
self…
• …in the presence of their partner.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
8. • Primary Relationships
Significant Other
Close family members (e.g. children)
“Closest and Best” Friends
God
• Secondary Relationships
Everyone else
Other friends, boss, extended family, family
friends, friends of significant other, the person
you met at the bus stop, etc.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
9. • It has a high priority in your life.
The relationship is “primary” for both of
you.
Both are willing to be completely open
and vulnerable with each other—
comprehensive trust.
Boundaries diminish as you become
closer.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
10. • It has a high priority in your life.
Concerted effort to spend time
together.
No fear of judgment.
Each one strives to help the other be or
become their most authentic self.
The relationship is an end, not a means.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
11. • Growing in closeness not a priority.
• Vulnerability not required.
Safety and security is not that
necessary.
• Time together is nice, but not a
necessity.
• The relationship sometimes serves a
specific purpose.
Relationship is a means, not an Buchmann MA, MFT
Ryan end.
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
12. Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
14. When a person feels “exposed,” what
is the emotion associated with the
experience?
Joy
Sadness
Anger
Fear
Shame
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
15. If my vulnerability causes me to feel
ashamed of myself, I will likely not let
myself be vulnerable again.
How can I create a space where my
partner will not feel ashamed when
vulnerable?
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
16. What causes one to feel shame?
Judgment!
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
17. “Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
18. (Uh, what’s “intimacy?”)
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
19. “Intimacy is
The recursive experience…
…of open self-confrontation
(vulnerability)…
…of core aspects of the self…
…in the presence of a partner.”
--David Schnarch
Author of Passionate Marriage
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
20. • State of voluntarily being
exposed.
• Open self-confrontation.
• Involves a risk (judgment,
disagreement, rejection,
separation).
• Most often feels uncomfortable.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
21. Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
22. • Key elements:
Vulnerability
Communication
Openness to confronting the
deepest self in the presence of
your partner….
In the absence of judgment.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
23. Based on the book by Matthew Kelly
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
24. Clichés
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
25. • Casual interactions
• Reveal little about each person
• Rely on fleeting and superficial
exchanges.
• The style of communication is not a
“conversation,” rather it is a
transaction.
Relationships are NOT made up of
transactions.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
26. • Common “cliché” terms
Good
Nice
Interesting
Fine
Okay
Whatever!
Translation: “I disagree with what you’re
saying, and I don’t want to discuss it now.”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
27. • Advantages
Establishes connection with others.
Enables us to conduct daily affairs.
Great conversation starters.
• Disadvantages
Can become shallow and superficial.
Can be used to keep others at an
emotional distance.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
28. • The best way to move a relationship
beyond the level of clichés?
Carefree
timelessness!
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
29. Facts
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
30. • Focus is on communicating facts
about our lives and our world.
• The facts are mundane, self-evident,
and conflict-avoidant.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
31. • Advantages
Ignites our love for learning and getting
to know another person.
Reawakens our natural yearning for
knowledge.
• Disadvantages
Continued use of facts when revealing
our selves to others leaves the
relationship superficial and stale.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
32. • The best way to move a relationship
beyond the level of facts?
Practice non-
judgment & express
appreciation!
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
33. Opinions
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
34. • Advantages
Initiates a forward step toward
authenticity (self-expression).
Opens an opportunity for genuine
agreement, not just conformity.
Enables the possibility for acceptance
even if the other is not entirely right.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
35. • Disadvantages
People often cannot get past this level
unless they have the other completely
“figured out.”
Arguments often flare up because each
wants the other to believe in the same
way they do (a.k.a. conformity).
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
36. • Opinions are the first step toward
becoming vulnerable with another
person.
• The biggest risk of sharing an opinion
is disagreement.
• The key to this level is acceptance,
not understanding (“figured out”).
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
37. • Acceptance
The ability to respect each other’s opinions
and unconditionally accept the other,
despite the differences of opinion.
Being a benevolent witness of someone’s
journey through life, rather than a
manipulative or dictatorial force in it.
Allows a person to be themselves, not
pushed into someone you want them to be.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
38. • Understanding
A condition of acceptance (“I can’t figure
her out” or “He doesn’t make sense to
me.”)
A need for predictability, to know how
he/she will react in a situation.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
39. • What is it about me that mandates
that I completely understand this
person with respect to this issue?
• What experiences have influenced
and formed my opinions?
• Is my position the absolute truth?
• Is this the hill I want to die on?
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
40. • The best way to move a relationship
beyond the level of opinions?
Find common ground.
Accept one another.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
41. “Tough Love – Episode 1”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
42. Hopes and Dreams
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
43. • Our hopes, dreams, and goals are a
derivative of our authenticity.
• Inform us of a person’s values.
• The person with whom we will form a
primary relationship will be the one
who will help us fulfill our dreams.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
44. The Kicker:
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
45. • Know what drives those closest to
you.
• Dreams provide a vision of where one
wants to be in life.
• Dreams change constantly. Stay in
touch with your and your partner’s
dreams.
• Write your dreams down!
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
46. Best way to move a relationship
beyond the level of hopes and
dreams?
Delayed
Gratification
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
47. Don’t let yourself get overwhelmed
when someone reveals all their hopes
and dreams to you at once!
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
48. “My Cousin Vinny”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
49. Feelings
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
50. • Emotional reactions to the world
around us.
• The big question:
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
51. • Removing the mask of “having it all
together,” making yourself
vulnerable, and telling your
significant other how you really feel.
• The failure to release stored up
emotions is the core of
psychopathology.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
52. • How do I create an environment that
enables a person to openly express
how they feel?
Unconditional
acceptance
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
53. • Quote of the day:
“Confident that they will not be judged or
criticized but rather accepted for who they are
and where they are on their journey, most
people will open the doors of their hearts.”
Matthew Kelly
“Seven Levels of intimacy”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
54. • Learn to listen to the other person.
• Make the person feel as if nothing
else existed, except the two of you.
• Ask the question “Why is this person
saying this to me?”
Until you know why, remain silent and
listen.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
55. • “Our journey toward intimacy means
trying to understand why people have
certain feelings and why they react to
certain people and situations as they
do.”
• “We will likely discover these truths
about the people we love
.”
Matthew Kelly
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
56. “About Last Night…”
What are the emotions NOT expressed?
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
57. Faults, Fears, and Failures
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
58. • In Level 5, we make ourselves
vulnerable. In Level 6, we expose
ourselves.
Emotional nakedness
• True advancement in this level is
when you can honestly and humbly
admit to your significant other “I need
help.”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
59. • Also heard at this level:
“I am afraid.”
“I messed up.”
Ownership of one’s faults, failings, or
mistakes.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
60. • The twisted paradox of vulnerability:
By owning your faults, fears, and
failures, people will accept you
even more.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
61. • People will own their faults, fears, and
failures only in a place of
unconditional acceptance.
• What are you doing to foster an
environment of unconditional
acceptance?
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
62. • The “magic” formula: How to create
an environment of unconditional
acceptance:
You must first accept yourself
unconditionally.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
63. • How do I accept myself unconditionally?
Know your “dark” or “shadow” side
If a person behaves in a way that does not make
sense, it is likely the shadow in action.
Ask your closest friends “What is the gold
you see in me?”
Then ask your family members “What are the
shadows you see in me?”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
64. “Elizabethtown”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
65. Legitimate Needs
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
66. • A dynamic collaboration to fulfill the
needs of your significant other.
• Providing needs, not wants.
• At this level, we build a lifestyle that
helps each other be our authentic
selves.
• It’s about revealing MY needs, not
getting my partner to reveal theirs.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
67. • Ask yourself: Is this a need or is this a
want? How does this need enable me
to be my authentic self?
• Relationships are not about getting
what you want. Relationships are about
helping each other become your
authentic self.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
68. • Love
Not a feeling, but an action.
Learning to know our partner’s
legitimate needs and attempting to
proactively fulfill them.
“You should KNOW that about me!”
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
69. • The biggest error of romantic
relationships:
Passing judgment and failing
to accept the other
unconditionally.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
70. • Vulnerability
• Absence of Judgment
• Unconditional Acceptance
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
71. • Identified primary & secondary
relationships.
• Defined and explained vulnerability
• Listed the 7 levels of intimacy
• Described how to move from one
level to the next.
• Saw lots of cool movie clips.
Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern
72. Ryan Buchmann MA, MFT
Pastoral Counselor
Marriage & Family Therapy Intern