Helping Your Child with Anxiety
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Parenting an anxious child can feel extremely challenging. SMG clinician's provide their thoughts and tips about how to best understand, respond to and approach your anxious child. You’ll learn about how anxiety works and learn strategies for helping your child overcome her/his fears.
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Helping Your Child with Anxiety
- 1. Helping Your Child with Anxiety Presented by: Allison Berry, MSW, LCSW Kristin Cole, MSW, LCSW
- 2. Agenda • Relaxation exercise • What is anxiety? • Signs of anxiety disorders • Common sources of & types of anxiety • How to help your child • How we help your child • Questions & Answers
- 3. Lets take a moment • Relaxation Exercise
- 4. Anxiety & Parents • Anxiety affects family • Parents’ emotional response • Anxious kids, anxious parents
- 5. Define Anxiety • Anxiety is a feeling of apprehension that something might go wrong • Normal • Body alarm
- 6. Common Sources of Anxiety • Preschool • Elementary • High school
- 7. Diagnosis • Most common mental health issue • 12-20% of children have anxiety – more common in girls, especially as they mature • 1 in 4 kids • Tends to run in families
- 8. Types of Anxiety Disorders • Separation Anxiety • Social Anxiety • GAD • Phobias • Panic
- 9. Red Flags • Anxiety is a problem when it impacts your child’s functioning • Distress out of proportion to situation – consider the intensity of the response • Easily distressed/avoidance • Repetitive reassurance-seeking • Somatic issues
- 10. Red Flags cont. • Anticipatory (weeks, hours ahead) • Trouble with sleep • Overly responsible • Clinging to you • Excessive coaxing/consoling
- 11. How can parents help? • “A frightened captain makes a frightened crew” – we are powerful • Make room for feelings • Resist the urge to problem-solve • Have faith in their ability
- 12. How Parents Can Help cont. • Gradually increase opportunities for risk taking • Model the process of managing “normal” worry • Resist reassurance • “I hear you, I see that you’re scared, I believe you can do this.”
- 13. In sum, Do’s and Don’ts • Do let him know its OK to be worried • Do acknowledge feelings • Do get his/her input/thoughts • Do stay calm • Do give kids control • Do reinforce effort
- 14. Don’ts • Don’t avoid • Don’t aim too high • Don’t accommodate • Don’t reassure • Don’t yell!
- 15. How does CBT help? • Education • Cognitive Restructuring • Tolerance & Coping • Exposures • Practice
- 17. Education • Thoughts vs feelings • How children know that they are worried • Worry –makes you think of what you’re afraid of rather than what is really true.
- 18. Education cont. • Understanding anxiety using a “kid-friendly” approach • Label and draw • Fight-or-flight response aka the “false body alarm”
- 19. Identifying Thoughts & Symptoms • Put the worries into words by asking your child questions
- 20. Targeting the Thoughts • Cognitive restructuring • Focus on facts vs. what is feared • Use of evidence • Focus on ability to cope and plan • Example- “What if I fail my test?”
- 21. Targeting the Thoughts cont. • Best case and worst case scenarios • The advice you give to a friend is usually the best advice
- 22. Talking Back • Some worries do not make sense and are NOT worth your time • “Back talk” to the worries • “That’s not true!” “Go away!” “ I don’t have to listen to you anymore.” • Empowering and leads to exposures
- 23. Targeting the Symptoms • Tolerance- “that’s just my false alarm” • Use of distraction • “Belly” breathing • Guided relaxation strategy • iPhone apps
- 24. Avoidance Behavior • Anxiety often leads to avoidance behaviors (ie; not going to school or parties, not sleeping alone) • Avoidance behaviors reinforce anxiety • The monster analogy
- 25. Exposures • Face your fear • Encourage your child to engage in exposing him/herself to the feared scenario and practice use of strategies • Start with the first step, gradual
- 26. Reassurance • Children who worry seek reassurance from parents over and over again • Like avoidance, it also reinforces anxiety and is a vicious cycle • Encourage self talk • Consistency in not responding with reassurance
- 27. Recommended Books • What To Do When You Worry Too Much, by: Dawn Huebner • Freeing Your Child from Anxiety, by: Tamar Chansky • Anxious Kids, Anxious Parents, by: Reid Wilson • The Kissing Hand, by: Audrey Penn • The Invisible String, by: Patrice Karst
- 28. Apps for Kids • Stop Breathe and Think • Calm down now • Breathe, Think, Do with Sesame • Headspace (broken down by age) • Mindfulness for Kids • Fitbits
- 29. Questions?