Ellen Grove presented games and tools for learning about conflict. These include models for understanding different types of conflict, such as Furlong's Circle of Conflict and the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Modes. Role-playing games demonstrate how perceptions, reactions, and behaviors can escalate or help resolve conflict. Additional resources provide guidance on separating positions from interests, involving relevant parties, and appreciating multiple perspectives in conflict. The presentation emphasizes approaches for constructive disagreement and building strong relationships.

1. Ellen Grove:
Games for Learning about Conflict
Thank
you
to
our
Sponsors

2. Games
for
Learning
About
Conflict
Ellen
Grove
agilepartnership.com
@eegrove

3. @eegrove

4. Where all think
alike, no one
thinks very
much.
Walter Lippman, The Stakes of Democracy 1915
@eegrove

5. @eegrove

6. @eegrove

7. Navigating
Foundering
@eegrove

8. Relationships
Values
Externals/
Moods
Furlongs’s
Circle of Conflict
Data
Structure
Interests
@eegrove

9. @eegrove

10. Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Modes
Competing
Collaborating
Assertiveness
Compromising
Avoiding
Cooperativeness
Accommodating
@eegrove

11. Social
Virus
@eegrove

12. Adkins:
h>p://agile.dzone.com/arAcles/agile-­‐managing-­‐conflict
@eegrove

13. What might
you do?:
Peacekeeping/
Protection
Shuttle
diplomacy to
de-escalate
Accommodate
Negotiate
Get factual
Support and
safety
Consensus
Adkins:
h>p://agile.dzone.com/arAcles/agile-­‐managing-­‐conflict
@eegrove

14. "Separate the people from the problem.”
"Focus on interests, not positions.”
"Invent options for mutual gain.”
"Insist on using objective criteria.”
"Know your BATNA (Best Alternative To
Negotiated Agreement)”
William Ury, Getting to YES, 1981
@eegrove

15. @eegrove

16. Everyone is
right…but only
partially
Lyssa Adkins and Michael Spayd
@eegrove

17. @eegrove

18. North-Going Zax
Position 1:
I MUST HAVE THE
LEMON!
@eegrove

19. South-Going Zax
Position 1:
I MUST HAVE THE
LEMON!
@eegrove

20. @eegrove
http://www.flickr.com/photos/45802332@N00/3308234796

21. North-Going Zax
Position:
I MUST HAVE THE LEMON!
Interest:
I need the rind of the
lemon to make pound-cake
@eegrove

22. South-Going Zax
Position:
I MUST HAVE THE LEMON!
Interest:
I need the pulp of the
lemon to make lemonade
@eegrove

23. @eegrove
http://www.flickr.com/photos/45802332@N00/3308234796

24. @eegrove

25. North-Going Zax
Two heads are
better than one
@eegrove

26. South-Going Zax
If you want
something done
right, do it
yourself
@eegrove

27. @eegrove
http://www.flickr.com/photos/djlicious/2191502470

28. Recap
² Perception: What’s your perception of conflict? What
kind of conflict are you engaged in?
² Escalation: What escalates conflict? What is your
reaction to conflict?
² Contagion: How does your behaviour affect other
people?
² Constellation: Who is affected? Who needs to be
involved in the solution?
² Position: How to differentiate between position and
interests?
² Contradiction: How can we appreciate multiple truths
and recognize our biases?
@eegrove

29. Great
relationships rely
on passionate
disagreement
Patrick Lencioni
@eegrove

30. Thank you!
egrove@agilepartnership.com
@eegrove
Masteringtheobvious.wordpress.com
@eegrove

31. How do you need to be with
each other?
What can you count on from
each other when the going
gets tough?
@eegrove
http://www.flickr.com/photos/dearbarbie/255550938

32. Resources
•
PublicaAons
–
–
–
–
•
Games
–
–
–
–
–
–
•
Furlong
(2005)
The
Conflict
ResoluAon
Handbook
Thomas
&
Kilmann
Conflict
Modes:
h>p://www.kilmanndiagnosAcs.com/overview-­‐thomas-­‐kilmann-­‐conflict-­‐mode-­‐instrument-­‐tki
Adkins,
NavigaAng
the
5
Levels
of
Conflict
the
Agile
Way:
h>p://agile.dzone.com/arAcles/agile-­‐managing-­‐conflict
Fisher
and
Ury
(1981),Geng
to
YES
PercepAon
(What
Color
is
Conflict?):
h>p://www.teachervision.fen.com/classroom-­‐management/acAvity/2922.html
EscalaAon
(Role
Plays):
h>p://esrnaAonal.org/resources/lessons-­‐from-­‐connected-­‐and-­‐respected/
Contagion
(Social
Virus):
h>p://www.thiagi.com/pfp/IE4H/august2011.html#Jolt
ConstellaAon
(Problem
ConstellaAon):h>p://agilemeditaAon.wordpress.com/2013/09/12/problem-­‐constellaAon/
PosiAon
(I
MUST
have
the
lemon!):
h>p://learningstore.uwex.edu/Assets/pdfs/B3870-­‐09.PDF
ContradicAon
(Au
contraire):
h>p://www.thiagi.com/pfp/IE4H/february2013.html#Jolt
Photo
credits
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jsjgeology/8512500151
http://www.flickr.com/photos/afireinwinter/9304601336
http://www.flickr.com/photos/johnson7/1460568819
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jkadlec/8650818989
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/da/Rolling-thunder-cloud.jpg
http://www.flickr.com/photos/niaid/8411599236
http://www.flickr.com/photos/kenlund
http://www.flickr.com/photos/45802332@N
http://www.flickr.com/photos/djlicious/2191502470
@eegrove