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Pastoral Counseling
Across Cultures
Bukal Life Care
2019
There are three components of our
personhood… our “trinity” as human
beings:
“That which is like everyone else.” This
is our HUMANITY
“That which is like no one else.” This is
our INDIVIDUALITY
“That which is like some others.” This is
our CULTURAL IDENTITY.
The “Human Trinity”
We often cannot tell which is which. If we
have limited understanding of other
cultures, we can't tell where individuality
stops and culture begins, or where
humanity stops and culture begins.
Problem #1. Stereotyping. Due to limited
understanding of other cultures, we think
we understand individuals within a
different culture because we know some
things about that culture.
Problem #2. Monocultural Mindset. Due to
lack of experience with other cultures, we
struggle with making sense of groups of
people who behave differently than we do. It
is confusing.
Two more problems related to lack of
adequate knowledge of other cultures:

Ethnocentrism. “Other cultures seem so
strange from a distance. My culture is so
much better.”

Exoticism. “Other cultures seem so
interesting and commendable from a
distance. My culture is so much more messed
up.”
Two major categories of issues related to
culture come to play in counseling.

Intracultural Counseling. This is holding counseling
with those of the same culture.

Intercultural Counseling. This is holding counseling
with those of other cultures.
But why would culture matter with intracultural
counseling? If two are in the same culture,
culture shouldn't matter, correct?
It does matter because in pastoral counseling, there is
often the presumption of monoculturalism... and
sometimes exoticism.

Monoculturalism. Many believe that counseling is
supracultural. That is, the communication patterns,
the process, and the ideals sought are universal. But
are they?

Exoticism. Some in one culture believe that those in
another culture (could be Bible culture, or it could
be culture in a different country) has got it all
together, so we all have to conform to that.
There is Western versus Eastern Ideal
regarding who makes decisions (has control)
and who is responsible for what happens
Both ideals have their strengths and weaknesses.
While many PC&C books offer an eclectic view of models,
strategies, and techniques, most focus on a single overarching
goal. That goal is to take someone from a dependent state to
an independent state (such as individuation or self-
actualization). This is a Western mindset. The unwritten
assumption of Western society (and consequently Western
counselors) is that an unhealthy individual is one who is
dependent on people and structures around him. The goal of
therapy is to engender a sense of autonomy or self-reliance in
the individual.
However, in many societies, such a sense of independence
from family, clan, or society is considered to be unhealthy.
Rather, these societies (such as much of the Eastern and
African cultures) see a healthy person as living and acting
within strong social bonds. These bonds typically take
precedence over self-determination.
The Bible seems to point towards something
that incorporates a bit of both the Eastern
and Western Ideals

I am an “I” but also part of a “We.”

Because of this our decisions (control) must take into
account the social connections we are in, not just what
meets our own needs or wants.

Likewise, we are responsible for our own actions, but
that does not cancel the fact that there is
accountability in terms of family and community.

Thus, in counseling, we don't try to fight another's
culture, but work with it, and expand it... from
independence or dependence toward interdependence.
“In mental distress, the Easterner tends
towards independence, isolation, or acting out.
Therapy tends to focus on learning
dependence”. On the other hand, “In mental
distress, the Westerner tends toward passive
dependence, depression, helplessness.
Therapy tends to focus on learning
independence.” (Augsberger, 88)
Why not treat everyone the same? Because
people simply are not the same...
Don't fight the worldview, but perhaps broaden it. For
the Western, work with the Independence but challenge
towards Interdependence. Do a similar thing with the
Eastern worldview
Culture/Worldview also guides what are
central motivators are.
Social Motivators

To focus on issues of guilt with a person whose
primary motivation is shame, for example, is likely
to not lead to growth in the individual.
One should adjust the goals and methodology of
counseling to the culture of the client. That doesn't
mean we don't challenge cultural values at times, but
this should be done with intentionality, not by
accident. And the goal is NOT to get the client to
accept the cultural values of the counselor.
In Intracultural Counseling we learn that
methods and goals cannot be the same for all
people. It can and should vary depending on
the culture.
Consider an episode in the TV series, “House.” Season 3,
episode 13 had Dr. Foreman working with a Romani
teenager who was very sick. The Romani are a group that
traditionally are very family and clan-oriented. They
make decisions as a group more than individuals.
Historically, they have often been looked down upon by
cultural groups around them that were more
individualistic.
Dr. Foreman sees great intelligence in the youth and
recommends he attend college and enters medical school.
A wise counselor would recognize the cultures
of Dr. Foreman and the Romani teen are very
different. While being open to challenge their
views, the counselor will do neither a favor by
attacking their values.
The young man refuses. His family wants him to be with
them. Dr. Foreman cannot understand this. He, himself,
had given up a lot of relationships to live his dream in
medicine.
The story ends a bit unresolved. The Romani youth leaves
joyfully with his family, while Dr. Foremen goes home
alone.
Maybe one should think of the Maslow's
Hierarchy of Needs as an upside-down rather
than normal pyramid.
This is because as we move up the pyramid of
needs, culture and individuality more strongly
affect us.

As humans, our physiological needs are more
universal.

But as we move up the pyramid, what gives us a sense
of esteem or of actualization is more dominated by our
individual preferences and our cultural ideals.

Some feel actualized by living to their own individual
potential, while others feel actualized by
connectedness to others, while still others by meeting
standards set by society as to success or esteem.

These differences can be gently challenged, but they
cannot be ignored.
Intercultural Counseling

How does one bridge the cultural gap?

Bridging the gap 100% between two cultures may
be impossible, but so is bridging the gap 100%
between two individuals.

The goal then is to start from our common humanity,
and then gradually understand the client in all of
their cultural and individual uniqueness.
Of Course, some aspects of intercultural
pastoral counseling are seemingly trivial

How does one do titles/show respect?

How much personal space is desirable?

Should one use eye contact or not?

How much small talk is needed?

Handshake? Bow? Physical contact or not?
Little things matter, but they are not the only things
that matter.
Pastoral Counseling involves addressing
feelings, beliefs, and values, but we can only
directly see people's behavior and their stuff.
It takes time and talk to see what is hidden inside
Culture Gap can lead to great
misunderstandings
East Visiting West
Culture Gap can lead to great
misunderstandings
West Visiting East
Cultural Awareness
Level Information Mode Interpretation
1 Awareness of superficial or
very visible cultural traits ;
stereotypes
Tourism, textbooks Unbelievable: weird,
exotic
2 Awareness of significant
and subtle cultural traits
that contrast markedly with
one’s own.
Culture-conflict
situations
Unbe1ievable :
frustrating, irritating
3 Awareness of the meanings
of the cultural traits that
contrast sharply with one’s
own.
Intellectual analysis Believable: I
understand
cognitively
4 Awareness of how another
culture feels from the
standpoint of the insider.
Cultural immersion;
living the culture
Believable: I
understand
affectively
How Culturally Aware is Aware Enough?

Probably Level 3 is enough. One understands the
motivations and behavior so that “it makes sense.”

Level 4 is nice but often not realistic.

If the counselor is at Level 1 (“weird and
interesting”) or Level 2 (“annoying and frustrating”)
the counselor has not gotten to the point that he or
she will be able to understand the client.

That being said, the counselor can seek to bracket
his or her attitude until the time that awareness
improves.
To Bridge the Cultural Gap takes
Communication.
The specific form of communication is Dialogue.
Dialoge is communication that is characterized as:
− Two-way
− Mutual (as equals)
− Respectful
− Seeking (mutual) understanding rather than
changing the other's mind
− Working towards a common mutually agreed upon
goal.
In Pastoral Counseling, guidelines given for
Interreligious Dialogue (IRD) is especially
useful since this form of counseling deals
much with religion and religious issues. Also
these guidelines are alse often quite
informative with regards to cross-cultural
communication.
Guidelines for IRD from Peter Feldmeier

Be without covert or ulterior motives. Do not secretly be
trying to convert them or prove yourself superior.

Cultivate an essential openness. Open mind, open heart

Religious traditions are respected in their own right. Seek
to understand things from the perspective of the other faith
tradition rather than one's own.

Differences are NOT to be avoided. Differences make
dialogue interesting. Don't try to focus on just similarities
or try hard to minimize differences.

Make no hasty determinations. Listen more, talk less. Be
slow to make judgments.
Attitudes for Effective IRD from John Stott
Authenticity
Humility
Integrity
Sensitivity
A final little note on the importance of
understanding

Understanding the other, as an individual and as a
member of another culture is not just a means to
healing, it also is an end.

People have a desperate need, often, to be
understood. The very act of trying to understand is
part of the healing process.
Reminder

Read the person as a “Living Human Document.” In
other words, don't be so fascinated by the culture of
the client that one loses focus on the client.

Use the culture to help understand the client. But
when the culture hides the client (as stereotyping
does... clouding where the individual stops and the
cultural identity begins), it has stopped being useful.
Reminder

In pastoral counseling, the role of the counselor is
not to take on the role of an evangelist or prophet or
preacher. We work with them where they are and
where they want to go.

The same is true regarding culture. It is not our job
to change their culture... but to work where they are
(in their context). There is room for some challenge,
but the goal is not to “convert” them to our culture.
References

David Augsberger, Pastoral Counseling Across Cultures,
(1986).

Robert Munson, Ministry in Diversity: Applied Cultural
Anthropology in a Multicultural World (2017).

Robert H. Munson, Dialogue in Diversity: Christians in
Conversation with a Multi-Cultural World (2019).

Robert H. and Celia P. Munson, Dynamics in Pastoral Care
(2019).

Peter Feldmeier. Encounters in Faith: Christianity in Inter-
religious Dialogue (2011).

John Stott, Christian Mission in the Modern World. (1975).
Pastoral Counseling
Across Cultures
Bukal Life Care
2019

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Cross-cultural Pastoral Counseling

  • 2. There are three components of our personhood… our “trinity” as human beings: “That which is like everyone else.” This is our HUMANITY “That which is like no one else.” This is our INDIVIDUALITY “That which is like some others.” This is our CULTURAL IDENTITY.
  • 4. We often cannot tell which is which. If we have limited understanding of other cultures, we can't tell where individuality stops and culture begins, or where humanity stops and culture begins.
  • 5. Problem #1. Stereotyping. Due to limited understanding of other cultures, we think we understand individuals within a different culture because we know some things about that culture.
  • 6. Problem #2. Monocultural Mindset. Due to lack of experience with other cultures, we struggle with making sense of groups of people who behave differently than we do. It is confusing.
  • 7. Two more problems related to lack of adequate knowledge of other cultures:  Ethnocentrism. “Other cultures seem so strange from a distance. My culture is so much better.”  Exoticism. “Other cultures seem so interesting and commendable from a distance. My culture is so much more messed up.”
  • 8. Two major categories of issues related to culture come to play in counseling.  Intracultural Counseling. This is holding counseling with those of the same culture.  Intercultural Counseling. This is holding counseling with those of other cultures.
  • 9. But why would culture matter with intracultural counseling? If two are in the same culture, culture shouldn't matter, correct? It does matter because in pastoral counseling, there is often the presumption of monoculturalism... and sometimes exoticism.  Monoculturalism. Many believe that counseling is supracultural. That is, the communication patterns, the process, and the ideals sought are universal. But are they?  Exoticism. Some in one culture believe that those in another culture (could be Bible culture, or it could be culture in a different country) has got it all together, so we all have to conform to that.
  • 10. There is Western versus Eastern Ideal regarding who makes decisions (has control) and who is responsible for what happens Both ideals have their strengths and weaknesses.
  • 11. While many PC&C books offer an eclectic view of models, strategies, and techniques, most focus on a single overarching goal. That goal is to take someone from a dependent state to an independent state (such as individuation or self- actualization). This is a Western mindset. The unwritten assumption of Western society (and consequently Western counselors) is that an unhealthy individual is one who is dependent on people and structures around him. The goal of therapy is to engender a sense of autonomy or self-reliance in the individual. However, in many societies, such a sense of independence from family, clan, or society is considered to be unhealthy. Rather, these societies (such as much of the Eastern and African cultures) see a healthy person as living and acting within strong social bonds. These bonds typically take precedence over self-determination.
  • 12. The Bible seems to point towards something that incorporates a bit of both the Eastern and Western Ideals  I am an “I” but also part of a “We.”  Because of this our decisions (control) must take into account the social connections we are in, not just what meets our own needs or wants.  Likewise, we are responsible for our own actions, but that does not cancel the fact that there is accountability in terms of family and community.  Thus, in counseling, we don't try to fight another's culture, but work with it, and expand it... from independence or dependence toward interdependence.
  • 13. “In mental distress, the Easterner tends towards independence, isolation, or acting out. Therapy tends to focus on learning dependence”. On the other hand, “In mental distress, the Westerner tends toward passive dependence, depression, helplessness. Therapy tends to focus on learning independence.” (Augsberger, 88) Why not treat everyone the same? Because people simply are not the same...
  • 14. Don't fight the worldview, but perhaps broaden it. For the Western, work with the Independence but challenge towards Interdependence. Do a similar thing with the Eastern worldview
  • 15. Culture/Worldview also guides what are central motivators are.
  • 16. Social Motivators  To focus on issues of guilt with a person whose primary motivation is shame, for example, is likely to not lead to growth in the individual. One should adjust the goals and methodology of counseling to the culture of the client. That doesn't mean we don't challenge cultural values at times, but this should be done with intentionality, not by accident. And the goal is NOT to get the client to accept the cultural values of the counselor.
  • 17. In Intracultural Counseling we learn that methods and goals cannot be the same for all people. It can and should vary depending on the culture. Consider an episode in the TV series, “House.” Season 3, episode 13 had Dr. Foreman working with a Romani teenager who was very sick. The Romani are a group that traditionally are very family and clan-oriented. They make decisions as a group more than individuals. Historically, they have often been looked down upon by cultural groups around them that were more individualistic. Dr. Foreman sees great intelligence in the youth and recommends he attend college and enters medical school.
  • 18. A wise counselor would recognize the cultures of Dr. Foreman and the Romani teen are very different. While being open to challenge their views, the counselor will do neither a favor by attacking their values. The young man refuses. His family wants him to be with them. Dr. Foreman cannot understand this. He, himself, had given up a lot of relationships to live his dream in medicine. The story ends a bit unresolved. The Romani youth leaves joyfully with his family, while Dr. Foremen goes home alone.
  • 19. Maybe one should think of the Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs as an upside-down rather than normal pyramid.
  • 20. This is because as we move up the pyramid of needs, culture and individuality more strongly affect us.  As humans, our physiological needs are more universal.  But as we move up the pyramid, what gives us a sense of esteem or of actualization is more dominated by our individual preferences and our cultural ideals.  Some feel actualized by living to their own individual potential, while others feel actualized by connectedness to others, while still others by meeting standards set by society as to success or esteem.  These differences can be gently challenged, but they cannot be ignored.
  • 21. Intercultural Counseling  How does one bridge the cultural gap?  Bridging the gap 100% between two cultures may be impossible, but so is bridging the gap 100% between two individuals.  The goal then is to start from our common humanity, and then gradually understand the client in all of their cultural and individual uniqueness.
  • 22. Of Course, some aspects of intercultural pastoral counseling are seemingly trivial  How does one do titles/show respect?  How much personal space is desirable?  Should one use eye contact or not?  How much small talk is needed?  Handshake? Bow? Physical contact or not? Little things matter, but they are not the only things that matter.
  • 23. Pastoral Counseling involves addressing feelings, beliefs, and values, but we can only directly see people's behavior and their stuff. It takes time and talk to see what is hidden inside
  • 24. Culture Gap can lead to great misunderstandings East Visiting West
  • 25. Culture Gap can lead to great misunderstandings West Visiting East
  • 26. Cultural Awareness Level Information Mode Interpretation 1 Awareness of superficial or very visible cultural traits ; stereotypes Tourism, textbooks Unbelievable: weird, exotic 2 Awareness of significant and subtle cultural traits that contrast markedly with one’s own. Culture-conflict situations Unbe1ievable : frustrating, irritating 3 Awareness of the meanings of the cultural traits that contrast sharply with one’s own. Intellectual analysis Believable: I understand cognitively 4 Awareness of how another culture feels from the standpoint of the insider. Cultural immersion; living the culture Believable: I understand affectively
  • 27. How Culturally Aware is Aware Enough?  Probably Level 3 is enough. One understands the motivations and behavior so that “it makes sense.”  Level 4 is nice but often not realistic.  If the counselor is at Level 1 (“weird and interesting”) or Level 2 (“annoying and frustrating”) the counselor has not gotten to the point that he or she will be able to understand the client.  That being said, the counselor can seek to bracket his or her attitude until the time that awareness improves.
  • 28. To Bridge the Cultural Gap takes Communication. The specific form of communication is Dialogue. Dialoge is communication that is characterized as: − Two-way − Mutual (as equals) − Respectful − Seeking (mutual) understanding rather than changing the other's mind − Working towards a common mutually agreed upon goal.
  • 29. In Pastoral Counseling, guidelines given for Interreligious Dialogue (IRD) is especially useful since this form of counseling deals much with religion and religious issues. Also these guidelines are alse often quite informative with regards to cross-cultural communication.
  • 30. Guidelines for IRD from Peter Feldmeier  Be without covert or ulterior motives. Do not secretly be trying to convert them or prove yourself superior.  Cultivate an essential openness. Open mind, open heart  Religious traditions are respected in their own right. Seek to understand things from the perspective of the other faith tradition rather than one's own.  Differences are NOT to be avoided. Differences make dialogue interesting. Don't try to focus on just similarities or try hard to minimize differences.  Make no hasty determinations. Listen more, talk less. Be slow to make judgments.
  • 31. Attitudes for Effective IRD from John Stott Authenticity Humility Integrity Sensitivity
  • 32. A final little note on the importance of understanding  Understanding the other, as an individual and as a member of another culture is not just a means to healing, it also is an end.  People have a desperate need, often, to be understood. The very act of trying to understand is part of the healing process.
  • 33. Reminder  Read the person as a “Living Human Document.” In other words, don't be so fascinated by the culture of the client that one loses focus on the client.  Use the culture to help understand the client. But when the culture hides the client (as stereotyping does... clouding where the individual stops and the cultural identity begins), it has stopped being useful.
  • 34. Reminder  In pastoral counseling, the role of the counselor is not to take on the role of an evangelist or prophet or preacher. We work with them where they are and where they want to go.  The same is true regarding culture. It is not our job to change their culture... but to work where they are (in their context). There is room for some challenge, but the goal is not to “convert” them to our culture.
  • 35. References  David Augsberger, Pastoral Counseling Across Cultures, (1986).  Robert Munson, Ministry in Diversity: Applied Cultural Anthropology in a Multicultural World (2017).  Robert H. Munson, Dialogue in Diversity: Christians in Conversation with a Multi-Cultural World (2019).  Robert H. and Celia P. Munson, Dynamics in Pastoral Care (2019).  Peter Feldmeier. Encounters in Faith: Christianity in Inter- religious Dialogue (2011).  John Stott, Christian Mission in the Modern World. (1975).