Top 9 sales jokes to close big deals

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There’s an unsigned contract on the table. You know it’s not the right time to be telling sales jokes.

But it doesn’t matter, you do it any way.

You say to the prospect, “have you heard the one about the Pure Wool Pants?” (sales joke #1)

http://senatorclub.co/when-you-tell-sales-jokes-like-this-you-close-big-deals/

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Top 9 sales jokes to close big deals

  1. 1. Top 9 Sales Jokes to Close Big Deals By Ian Adams and members of the Senator Club
  2. 2. SENATOR CLUB TOP 100 SALES TIPS 1. This  little  computer,  said  the  sales  clerk,  will  do   half  your  job  for  you.  The  senior  manager   studying  the  machine  made  his  decision;  Fine,  I   take  two.       http://www.workjoke.com/salespeople-­‐jokes.html           2. Two  shoe  salespeople  were  sent  to  Africa  to   open  up  new  markets.  Three  days  after  arriving,   one  salesperson  called  the  office  and  said,  "I'm   returning  on  the  next  flight.  Can't  sell  shoes   here.  Everybody  goes  barefoot.”  At  the  same   time  the  other  salesperson  sent  an  email  to  the   factory,  telling  "The  prospects  are  unlimited.   Nobody  wears  shoes  here!"       http://funnysalescartoons.com/forum/topics/story-­‐of-­‐two-­‐ shoe-­‐salesmen           3. How  do  salespeople  traditionally  greet  each   other?     "Hi.  Nice  to  meet  you.  I'm  better  than  you."       http://www.workjoke.com/salespeople-­‐jokes.html                 www.senatorclub.co Page 2 of 5
  3. 3. SENATOR CLUB TOP 100 SALES TIPS 4. Sales  manager  addressing  an  under  performing   sales  force  at  the  start  of  a  new  month:     "We  are  going  to  have  a  sales  contest  this   month.  The  winners  will  get  to  enter  next   month's  contest."       http://www.kellogg.northwestern.edu/faculty/zoltners/htm/ jokes.html     ____________________________________________________     5. Salesman:  This  jug  is  genuine  Indian  pottery.   Customer:  But  it  says  "Made  in   Cleveland."Salesman:  Havent  you  ever  heard  of   the  Cleveland  Indians?       http://www.funnymail.com/jokes/salesman-­‐jug-­‐genuine-­‐ indian-­‐pot     ____________________________________________________ 6. Insurance  agent  to  would-­‐be  client:  "Dont  let   me  frighten  you  into  a  hasty  decision.  Sleep  on   it  tonite.  If  you  wake  in  the  morning,  give  me  a   call  then  and  let  me  know.       http://www.jokeload.com/jokes/view/1625   www.senatorclub.co Page 3 of 5
  4. 4. SENATOR CLUB TOP 100 SALES TIPS 7. Had  a  door-­‐to-­‐door  salesman  call  one  time   selling  of  all  things  -­‐-­‐  burial  plots.  I  told  him  that   we  already  had  our  plots  in  another   cemetery.He  seemed  uncertain  as  to  what  to  say   next,  but  he  recovered  to  say  politely,  "I  hope   youll  be  very  happy  there."       http://www.jokeload.com/jokes/view/16256   ____________________________________________________ 8. Customer:  You  said  these  pants  were  pure  wool,   but  the  label  says  "all  cotton."Salesman:  Oh,   thats  just  to  keep  the  moths  away.       http://www.jokes99.com/joke/240   ____________________________________________________ 9. How  can  you  tell  when  a  salesperson  is   lying?His  lips  are  moving.       http://www.workjoke.com/salespeople-­‐jokes.html     ___________________________________________________     BONUS   Patient:  Doctor,  you  have  to  help  me  stop   talking  to  myself.  Doctor:  Why  is  that?  Patient:   I’m  a  salesman  and  I  keep  selling  myself  things  I   don’t  want       http://www.jokeload.com/jokes/view/16257   www.senatorclub.co Page 4 of 5
  5. 5. SENATOR CLUB TOP 100 SALES TIPS      I  published  the  entire  article  with  a  revised  order  and  additional  commentary  on   our  club  site.       http://senatorclub.co/when-­‐you-­‐tell-­‐sales-­‐jokes-­‐like-­‐this-­‐you-­‐close-­‐big-­‐deals/   www.senatorclub.co Page 5 of 5

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