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Empathy - The secret ingredient to
successful change engagement
APM Enabling Change SIG
13 June 2023
Introductions
Matt Lawrence
Matt is a project professional, speaker, trainer, and a
member of APM’s Enabling Change SIG.
Donna Unitt
Donna is the Head of Delivery at Rocket Consulting Ltd and is
the Chair of APM's Enabling Change SIG
Enabling Change
Specific Interest Group (SIG)
The Enabling Change SIG aims to develop and
sustain individual practitioner, team and
organisational change capability by facilitating
access to and exploration of change methods,
standards, case studies and good practices.
© 2023 Association for Project Management 3
Our mission is to:
Improve the change
capability of organisations,
teams and individuals
Agenda
© 2023 Association for Project Management 4
Lunch served 12.15
A selection of hot and cold foods will be
served arum simenimi, sus ma verum
aped ullab invelictem.
Afternoon session arrival 13.15
13.30 Speaker name
14.30 Meeting title
15.15 Drinks break
15.30 Meeting title
16.30 Speaker name
17.00 Drinks
1. Introductions
2. An introduction to empathy
3. Empathy and projects
4. Why empathy is valuable for Project Managers
5. Techniques to build empathy
6. Conclusion
An introduction to empathy
What is empathy?
© 2023 Association for Project Management 6
Understanding and
sharing the
thoughts and
feelings of others
“
” Unlocking team motivation through
authentic connections
Negotiating with suppliers and holding
them to account
Explaining new topics, updates, ideas
and bad news
Encouraging people to embrace new
ideas and adopt new ways of working
Supporting colleague performance by
identifying and removing blockers
The ingredients of empathy
© 2023 Association for Project Management 7
Perspective
Taking
Avoiding
Judgement
Social Cognition Communication
Empathy
Being able to recognise
that people have different
perspectives and
considering what it feels
like from their point of
view.
Recognising emotions
and feelings in others
(having the ability to ‘read
the room’) and take action
accordingly.
Not judging people or
discounting their
experience because this
is different to your own
views.
Communicating to explain
that you understand their
feelings and respect their
point of view.
The difference between empathy and sympathy
• Empathy is a one-on-one connection
because of a deep understanding that
comes from sharing an emotional
experience.
• Sympathy is a feeling of sadness or
pity felt for another person.
• Compassion is a broader sense of
care for the world at large.
© 2023 Association for Project Management 8
Sympathy is feeling compassion, sorrow,
or pity for the hardships that another
person encounters.
Empathy is the ability to put yourself in
another person’s shoes and understand the
feelings of others as if they were yours.
Sub headline title 18pt Arial Regular
Date of presentation 14pt Arial Regular
How are you feeling?
Balancing multiple priorities
Hungry and looking forward to lunch
Interested and intrigued
Curious about the content
Productive
Excited
Stressed between meetings
Looking forward to the end of the day
Looking forward to upskilling and learning
Interested
Overwhelmed with multi-tasking
Happy
The neuroscience of empathy
© 2023 Association for Project Management 10
▪ Empathy comes naturally to us – we're born with the capability to empathise.
▪ A variety of factors influences are capacity for empathy – childhood, friendships, career profession,
life events.
Hamlin, J., Wynn, K. & Bloom, P. Social evaluation by preverbal infants. Nature 450, 557–559 (2007)
When we empathise with
someone, mirror neurons are
activated which generate
feelings in ourselves.
This resonance between our
brains and another individual
helps us to understand what
they’re feeling in much more
depth.
Evolutionary psychological
effect of this is that we’re more
likely to help one another and
avoid conflict therefore
supporting teamwork.
Empathy in Projects
The difference between projects and change
© 2023 Association for Project Management 12
Project
Management
Change Management
Outputs Benefits
Outcomes Capability
• Agreeing a vision of the future
• Coordinating senior leaders and managers
• Changing ways of working
• Supporting people to learn new things
• Communicating change
• Honest conversations about progress
• Motivating a change/project team
• Developing resilience in colleagues
• Embedding learning and reinforcing
• Facilitating training
• Supporting people to use new technology
• Recognising and solving challenges
The Change Curve
© 2023 Association for Project Management 13
Kubler-Ross Change Curve
Rogers – Unconditional Positive Regard
The 3 Core Conditions are:
1. Empathy
• Understand the thoughts and the feelings as that someone
experiences them, sometimes referred to as ‘walking in someone
else’s shoes’.
• The reason is that we all have our own perception of the world.
2. Congruence
• Genuine and real.
• This condition is important as builds a trusting relationship
3. Unconditional Positive Regard (UPR)
• The third condition is known as unconditional positive regard or UPR
for short.
• Unconditional positive regard allows the person to open up and speak
about their challenges without fear of being criticised or judged.
© 2023 Association for Project Management 14
Why empathy is valuable for Project
Managers
How empathy can build deeper relationships
© 2023 Association for Project Management 16
Projects involve engagement with people and
stakeholders
We need to be able to engage rationally and
emotionally with stakeholders.
Empathy provides a valuable tool to make a
connection between ourselves and other people
Communication
Developing deeper
relationships
Anticipate issues Resolve conflict
Boost
performance
What are the advantages of empathy?
© 2023 Association for Project Management 17
91% of CEOs believe
empathy is directly linked to a
company’s financial performance1
82% of employees said they
would consider leaving their job for
a more empathetic organisation2
1,2Businesolver, 2019 State of Workplace Empathy
3High-Resolution Leadership, Development Dimensions International
empathy tops the list as
the most critical driver of
overall performance3
“
”
Techniques to build empathy
The Role of the Empathetic Listener
And, when you successfully win their
trust and confidence, make sure that
you respect it.
© 2023 Association for Project Management 19
The role of an empathic listener is to be
supportive, kind and caring.
Listen carefully and without judgment.
Interject occasionally to show that
you've understood what's being said.
Where appropriate, repeat key phrases
to encourage the speaker to open up.
Pay attention to what's not being
said, too. Take note of the speaker's
emotional state, their tone of voice,
and their body language.
Mirroring the behaviour of others
Unconscious Bias
▪ Bias is normal
▪ Recognising that we all have unconscious bias
▪ You may only hear what you want to hear
▪ You may have preconceived ideas about the type
of individual
▪ You may put the person in particular group and
generalise
▪ What’s happened before could have a baring on
your thoughts
▪ You may think you know better
© 2023 Association for Project Management 20
The power of vulnerability
▪ Show your vulnerability – make that
person trust and open up to you – being
vulnerable promotes empathy
▪ Share your own stories and experience
▪ State that you do not know all the
answers
▪ Show how important they are to
achieving the change
▪ Take them on the journey not just dump
them at the destination
© 2023 Association for Project Management 21
Practical techniques to authentically empathise
© 2023 Association for Project Management 22
Think about
how you
would want
to be treated
in the other
person’s
position and
let that
guide you
Make a
point of
noticing the
mood of the
room or the
emotional
responses
of the
person you
are
engaging –
look for
micro-cues
Acknowledg
e the issues
or risks –
don’t try to
put a
positive
gloss on
everything
Ask
questions to
better
understand
– especially
if someone
presents
something
that doesn’t
fit with your
own beliefs
or the
consensus
Summarise
back to
check your
understandi
ng of the
key points
Follow up
with people
afterwards –
a wall of
silence
dismantles
trust built
Use
feedback
loops –
remember
true
empathy is
part of
everyday
business
Considering empathy in your project
© 2023 Association for Project Management 23
▪ An Empathy Map is a stakeholder analysis
tool to help you understand your stakeholders
in more detail.
▪ To complete an Empathy Map, consider the
following prompt questions in relation to your
stakeholder group.
▪ You can either directly engage with the
stakeholder group or make it an imaginative
exercise to draw out insights based on your
current understanding
1. What will they think and feel?
2. What will they hear and see?
3. What will they say and do?
4. What are their potential gains?
5. What are their potential pains?
Conclusion
▪ Empathy is a key factor for project success
▪ In addition to building your own empathy skills, you will need to promote a wider
empathetic approach across your project team
▪ Consider the use of Empathy Maps to ensure a people-centric focus
▪ Take small steps to improve your own empathy skills
© 2023 Association for Project Management 24

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Empathy - the secret ingredient to successful change engagement webinar, 13 June 2023

  • 1. Empathy - The secret ingredient to successful change engagement APM Enabling Change SIG 13 June 2023
  • 2. Introductions Matt Lawrence Matt is a project professional, speaker, trainer, and a member of APM’s Enabling Change SIG. Donna Unitt Donna is the Head of Delivery at Rocket Consulting Ltd and is the Chair of APM's Enabling Change SIG
  • 3. Enabling Change Specific Interest Group (SIG) The Enabling Change SIG aims to develop and sustain individual practitioner, team and organisational change capability by facilitating access to and exploration of change methods, standards, case studies and good practices. © 2023 Association for Project Management 3 Our mission is to: Improve the change capability of organisations, teams and individuals
  • 4. Agenda © 2023 Association for Project Management 4 Lunch served 12.15 A selection of hot and cold foods will be served arum simenimi, sus ma verum aped ullab invelictem. Afternoon session arrival 13.15 13.30 Speaker name 14.30 Meeting title 15.15 Drinks break 15.30 Meeting title 16.30 Speaker name 17.00 Drinks 1. Introductions 2. An introduction to empathy 3. Empathy and projects 4. Why empathy is valuable for Project Managers 5. Techniques to build empathy 6. Conclusion
  • 6. What is empathy? © 2023 Association for Project Management 6 Understanding and sharing the thoughts and feelings of others “ ” Unlocking team motivation through authentic connections Negotiating with suppliers and holding them to account Explaining new topics, updates, ideas and bad news Encouraging people to embrace new ideas and adopt new ways of working Supporting colleague performance by identifying and removing blockers
  • 7. The ingredients of empathy © 2023 Association for Project Management 7 Perspective Taking Avoiding Judgement Social Cognition Communication Empathy Being able to recognise that people have different perspectives and considering what it feels like from their point of view. Recognising emotions and feelings in others (having the ability to ‘read the room’) and take action accordingly. Not judging people or discounting their experience because this is different to your own views. Communicating to explain that you understand their feelings and respect their point of view.
  • 8. The difference between empathy and sympathy • Empathy is a one-on-one connection because of a deep understanding that comes from sharing an emotional experience. • Sympathy is a feeling of sadness or pity felt for another person. • Compassion is a broader sense of care for the world at large. © 2023 Association for Project Management 8 Sympathy is feeling compassion, sorrow, or pity for the hardships that another person encounters. Empathy is the ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes and understand the feelings of others as if they were yours.
  • 9. Sub headline title 18pt Arial Regular Date of presentation 14pt Arial Regular How are you feeling? Balancing multiple priorities Hungry and looking forward to lunch Interested and intrigued Curious about the content Productive Excited Stressed between meetings Looking forward to the end of the day Looking forward to upskilling and learning Interested Overwhelmed with multi-tasking Happy
  • 10. The neuroscience of empathy © 2023 Association for Project Management 10 ▪ Empathy comes naturally to us – we're born with the capability to empathise. ▪ A variety of factors influences are capacity for empathy – childhood, friendships, career profession, life events. Hamlin, J., Wynn, K. & Bloom, P. Social evaluation by preverbal infants. Nature 450, 557–559 (2007) When we empathise with someone, mirror neurons are activated which generate feelings in ourselves. This resonance between our brains and another individual helps us to understand what they’re feeling in much more depth. Evolutionary psychological effect of this is that we’re more likely to help one another and avoid conflict therefore supporting teamwork.
  • 12. The difference between projects and change © 2023 Association for Project Management 12 Project Management Change Management Outputs Benefits Outcomes Capability • Agreeing a vision of the future • Coordinating senior leaders and managers • Changing ways of working • Supporting people to learn new things • Communicating change • Honest conversations about progress • Motivating a change/project team • Developing resilience in colleagues • Embedding learning and reinforcing • Facilitating training • Supporting people to use new technology • Recognising and solving challenges
  • 13. The Change Curve © 2023 Association for Project Management 13 Kubler-Ross Change Curve
  • 14. Rogers – Unconditional Positive Regard The 3 Core Conditions are: 1. Empathy • Understand the thoughts and the feelings as that someone experiences them, sometimes referred to as ‘walking in someone else’s shoes’. • The reason is that we all have our own perception of the world. 2. Congruence • Genuine and real. • This condition is important as builds a trusting relationship 3. Unconditional Positive Regard (UPR) • The third condition is known as unconditional positive regard or UPR for short. • Unconditional positive regard allows the person to open up and speak about their challenges without fear of being criticised or judged. © 2023 Association for Project Management 14
  • 15. Why empathy is valuable for Project Managers
  • 16. How empathy can build deeper relationships © 2023 Association for Project Management 16 Projects involve engagement with people and stakeholders We need to be able to engage rationally and emotionally with stakeholders. Empathy provides a valuable tool to make a connection between ourselves and other people Communication Developing deeper relationships Anticipate issues Resolve conflict Boost performance
  • 17. What are the advantages of empathy? © 2023 Association for Project Management 17 91% of CEOs believe empathy is directly linked to a company’s financial performance1 82% of employees said they would consider leaving their job for a more empathetic organisation2 1,2Businesolver, 2019 State of Workplace Empathy 3High-Resolution Leadership, Development Dimensions International empathy tops the list as the most critical driver of overall performance3 “ ”
  • 19. The Role of the Empathetic Listener And, when you successfully win their trust and confidence, make sure that you respect it. © 2023 Association for Project Management 19 The role of an empathic listener is to be supportive, kind and caring. Listen carefully and without judgment. Interject occasionally to show that you've understood what's being said. Where appropriate, repeat key phrases to encourage the speaker to open up. Pay attention to what's not being said, too. Take note of the speaker's emotional state, their tone of voice, and their body language. Mirroring the behaviour of others
  • 20. Unconscious Bias ▪ Bias is normal ▪ Recognising that we all have unconscious bias ▪ You may only hear what you want to hear ▪ You may have preconceived ideas about the type of individual ▪ You may put the person in particular group and generalise ▪ What’s happened before could have a baring on your thoughts ▪ You may think you know better © 2023 Association for Project Management 20
  • 21. The power of vulnerability ▪ Show your vulnerability – make that person trust and open up to you – being vulnerable promotes empathy ▪ Share your own stories and experience ▪ State that you do not know all the answers ▪ Show how important they are to achieving the change ▪ Take them on the journey not just dump them at the destination © 2023 Association for Project Management 21
  • 22. Practical techniques to authentically empathise © 2023 Association for Project Management 22 Think about how you would want to be treated in the other person’s position and let that guide you Make a point of noticing the mood of the room or the emotional responses of the person you are engaging – look for micro-cues Acknowledg e the issues or risks – don’t try to put a positive gloss on everything Ask questions to better understand – especially if someone presents something that doesn’t fit with your own beliefs or the consensus Summarise back to check your understandi ng of the key points Follow up with people afterwards – a wall of silence dismantles trust built Use feedback loops – remember true empathy is part of everyday business
  • 23. Considering empathy in your project © 2023 Association for Project Management 23 ▪ An Empathy Map is a stakeholder analysis tool to help you understand your stakeholders in more detail. ▪ To complete an Empathy Map, consider the following prompt questions in relation to your stakeholder group. ▪ You can either directly engage with the stakeholder group or make it an imaginative exercise to draw out insights based on your current understanding 1. What will they think and feel? 2. What will they hear and see? 3. What will they say and do? 4. What are their potential gains? 5. What are their potential pains?
  • 24. Conclusion ▪ Empathy is a key factor for project success ▪ In addition to building your own empathy skills, you will need to promote a wider empathetic approach across your project team ▪ Consider the use of Empathy Maps to ensure a people-centric focus ▪ Take small steps to improve your own empathy skills © 2023 Association for Project Management 24