1. Most people want to avoid conflict and potentially stressful
situations – this is human nature. People often find it easier
to avoid communicating something that they think is going
to be controversial or bad, putting off the communication
and letting the situation fester.
TIPSin communicating
in difficult
SITUATIONS

2. There are two distinct types of
difficult conversation:
Planned
Unplanned

3. Planned
 Planned conversations occur when the subject has
been given thought, they are planned as the time,
place and other circumstances have been arranged
or are chosen for a reason.
 Planned difficult conversations could include asking
an employer for a pay-rise or perhaps telling your
parents that you are leaving home to live somewhere
else.
 Although these situations are, by their nature, difficult
they are controlled and as long as time has been
taken to prepare and think properly about how others
may react they can often end up being easier than
imagined.
Tips in communicating in difficult situations.

4. Unplanned
 Unplanned difficult conversations take place on the
spur of the moment; these are often fuelled by anger
which can, in extreme cases, lead to aggression.
 Often, after an unplanned difficult conversation we
feel a surge of emotion – regret or shame if things
didn't go too well or potentially a boost to self-esteem
and confidence if they did.
 After such encounters it is wise to reflect and learn
from our experiences trying to find positives and ways
of improving future unplanned difficult conversations.
Tips in communicating in difficult situations.

5. Certain jobs and roles require
difficult communication to be
handled professionally, with
empathy, tact, discretion and
clarity.
Tips in communicating in
difficult situations.

6. Politicians
 Politicians often have to communicate bad news, for
example, failures in their departments, scandals, not
meeting targets etc.
 As Politicians are in the public eye they may be
judged by how well they communicate bad news.
 They will worry about their electorate and the
repercussions for their self-image, their political party
and their country.
Certain jobs and roles require difficult communication to be handled professionally, with empathy, tact,
discretion and clarity

7. Politicians
 It is not unusual for Politicians to use ‘spin doctors’ and
‘public relation gurus’ who can advise, alleviate
personal blame and find positives in potentially bad
news.
 Another trick sometimes used by politicians is to
coincide the release of bad news with some other,
unrelated big news story, with the hope that media
and public attention will be focused elsewhere.
Certain jobs and roles require difficult communication to be handled professionally, with empathy, tact,
discretion and clarity

8. Health Care Professionals
 Doctors and other Health Care Professionals may need
to communicate bad or unexpected news to patients
and relations of patients, for example, diagnosis and
prognosis. Such professionals will have received
training and will have worked in practise scenarios to
help them to deliver such news effectively and
sensitively.
Certain jobs and roles require difficult communication to be handled professionally, with empathy, tact,
discretion and clarity

9. Police and Law Enforcement
 Police and other Law Enforcement Officers may need
to communicate bad news to victims of crime or their
family and friends. Such professionals will have
received at least basic training in delivering bad news.
Certain jobs and roles require difficult communication to be handled professionally, with empathy, tact,
discretion and clarity

10. Managers
 Managers in organisations may need to communicate
difficult information on several levels, to staff who are
under-performing or if redundancies are
necessary. Managers may also need to report bad
news upwards to directors or board members,
perhaps profits are down or some arm of the
organisation is failing.
Certain jobs and roles require difficult communication to be handled professionally, with empathy, tact,
discretion and clarity

11. Emotion and Change
Emotion
 People tend to look at emotions as being positive or
negative. Happiness is positive and therefore sadness
must be negative, calmness is positive whereas stress
and anxiety are negative.
 Emotions are natural response to situations that we
find ourselves in, and the only time that we need to be
concerned is when we consistently feel emotions
inappropriate to our current situation.
 Emotions are not positive or negative but appropriate
or inappropriate.
There are two main factors that make communication seem difficult: emotion and
change.

12. Emotion and Change
 When faced with unexpected news we may find
ourselves becoming upset, frustrated, angry – or
perhaps very happy and excited. It is helpful to
recognise how we react to things emotionally and to
think of different ways in which emotions can be
controlled if necessary. Similarly, if we need to
communicate information which may have an
emotional effect on another person, it is helpful to
anticipate what that effect might be and to tailor
what we say or write accordingly.
There are two main factors that make communication seem difficult: emotion and
change.

13. Emotion and Change
Change
 Often difficult conversations are about some sort of
change, for example, changes in your job or ways of
doing things, changes in finances or health, changes
in a relationship. It is important to remember that
change is inevitable.
There are two main factors that make communication seem difficult: emotion and
change.

14. Emotion and Change
 Different people handle change in different ways,
some respond very positively to a change in
circumstances whereas others may only be able to
see problems and difficulty at first.
 If possible it is beneficial to think about the positive
side of the change and the potential opportunities
that it may bring.
 It is better for an individual’s well-being if they are able
to embrace change as positively as possible, thus
helping to minimise stress and anxiety.
There are two main factors that make communication seem difficult: emotion and
change.

15. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
There has to be a balance between
communicating something difficult and
being as sensitive as possible to those
concerned. The skill set required to do this
may seem somewhat contradictory as
you may need to be both firm and gentle
in your approach.

16. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Recommended skills include:
Information Gathering
Make sure you have your facts straight before
you begin, know what you are going to say
and why you are going to say it. Try to
anticipate any questions or concerns others
may have and think carefully about how you
will answer questions.

17. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Being Assertive
Once you are sure that something
needs to be communicated then do so
in an assertive way. Do not find yourself
backing down or changing your mind
mid-conversation, unless of course there
is very good reason to do so.

18. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Being Empathic
Put yourself in the other person’s shoes
and think about how they will feel about
what you are telling them; how would
you feel if the roles were reversed? Give
others time to ask questions and make
comments.

19. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Being Empathic
Put yourself in the other person’s shoes
and think about how they will feel about
what you are telling them; how would
you feel if the roles were reversed? Give
others time to ask questions and make
comments.

20. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Being Prepared to Negotiate
Often a difficult situation requires a
certain amount of negotiation, be
prepared for this. When negotiating,
aim for a Win - Win outcome – that is,
some way in which all parties can
benefit.

21. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Using Appropriate Verbal and Non-Verbal
Language
Speak clearly avoiding any jargon that
other parties may not understand, give
eye contact and try to sit or stand in a
relaxed way. Do not use confrontational
language or body language

22. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Using Appropriate Verbal and Non-Verbal
Language
Speak clearly avoiding any jargon that
other parties may not understand, give
eye contact and try to sit or stand in a
relaxed way. Do not use confrontational
language or body language

23. Dealing with Difficult
Conversations
Staying Calm and Focused
Communication becomes easier when we are
calm, take some deep breaths and try to
maintain an air of calmness, others are more
likely to remain calm if you do. Keep focused
on what you want to say, don’t deviate or get
distracted from the reason that you are
communicating.

24. Confidence is not something that can be learned like a set of rules;
confidence is a state of mind. Positive thinking, practice, training,
knowledge and talking to other people are all useful ways to help improve
or boost your confidence levels.
Confidence comes from feelings of well-being, acceptance of your body
and mind (self-esteem) and belief in your own ability, skills and experience.
SelfConfidence

25. Self Confidence
 Confidence and self-esteem are not the same thing,
although they are often linked.
 Confidence is the term we use to describe how we
feel about our ability to perform roles, functions and
tasks. Self-esteem is how we feel about ourselves, the
way we look, the way we think - whether or not we
feel worthy or valued.
 People with low self-esteem often also suffer from
generally low confidence, but people with good self-
esteem can also have low confidence. It is also
perfectly possible for people with low self-esteem to
be very confident in some areas..
Building Confidence

26. Self Confidence
 Performing a role or completing a task confidently is
not about not making mistakes. Mistakes are
inevitable, especially when doing something new.
Confidence includes knowing what to do when
mistakes come to light and therefore is also about
problem solving and decision making.
Find more
at: http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ps/confidence.html
#ixzz2qF4LREbS
Building Confidence

27. Self Confidence
Planning and Preparation
People often feel less confident about
new or potentially difficult situations.
Perhaps the most important factor in
developing confidence is planning and
preparing for the unknown.
Ways to Improve Confidence

28. Self Confidence
Learning, Knowledge and Training
Learning and research can help us to
feel more confident about our ability to
handle situations, roles and tasks.
Ways to Improve Confidence

29. Self Confidence
Positive Thought
Positive thought can be a very powerful
way of improving confidence.
“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be
done without hope and confidence”. –Hellen Keller
Ways to Improve Confidence

30. Self Confidence
Try to recondition the way you think about your
life:
Know your strengths and weaknesses.
We all make mistakes. Don't think of your
mistakes as negatives but rather as learning
opportunities.
Accept compliments and compliment yourself.
Use criticism as a learning experience.
Try to stay generally cheerful and have a
positive outlook on life.
Ways to Improve Confidence

31. Self Confidence
Talking to Others and Following Their Lead
Generally people are attracted to confident
people - confidence is one of the main
characteristics of charisma.
“Confidence is contagious. So is lack of
confidence.” –Vince Lombardi
Ways to Improve Confidence

32. Self Confidence
Experience
As we successfully complete tasks and goals,
our confidence that we can complete the
same and similar tasks again increases.
Ways to Improve Confidence

33. Self Confidence
Be Assertive
Being assertive means standing up for what
you believe in and sticking to your principles.
Ways to Improve Confidence

34. Self Confidence
Avoid Arrogance
Arrogance is detrimental to interpersonal
relationships.
Ways to Improve Confidence