University of Washington REI Cross Cultural Communication

University of Washington
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Seattle Girls’ School
What I Said and What I Meant:
Cross Cultural Communication
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)

About Seattle Girls’ School

Agenda
 Cultural Competence
 Cross Cultural Communication
 Cultural Identifiers, Power, and
Communication
 Dialogue Tools

Culture [consists] primarily of the
symbolic, ideational, and intangible
aspects of human societies… It is the
values, symbols, interpretations, and
perspectives that distinguish one
people from another.
James A. Banks
What is Culture?

Race
Religion
Class
Gender
Sexual
Orientation
Ability
Age
Ethnicity
Geographic Location
Language
Educational
Attainment
Appearance
Seniority
Position
or Title
Status
Relationship
To Power Players
InternalExternal
Institutional
Dimensions of Identity and Culture

Cultural Competency:
Many Models
Cultural competence is a set of
congruent behaviors, attitudes and
policies that come together in a
system, institution or individual and
enable that system, institution or
individual to work effectively in cross-
cultural situations.
Terry Cross

The Jones Model of Cultural Competence
Cultural Self-
Awareness
Cultural
Intelligence
Cross-Cultural
Effectiveness
Skills
Countering
Oppression
through
Inclusion

 What is it?
 How is it Different from Intercultural
Communication?
 CCC Theories
– Face-Negotiation Theory
– Conversational Constraints Theory
– Expectancy Violation Theory
– Anxiety/Uncertainty Management Theory
– Communication Accommodation Theory
Cross Cultural Communication

Individual - Collectivistic
Low Context - High Context
Task - Relationship
Low Uncertainty - High Uncertainty
Vertical - Horizontal
Dimensions of Variability

Discussion: My Style
In hearing about
communication theories
and dimensions of
variability, what would you
describe as your cultural
communication? Have you
noticed stark differences
compared to others?

 Personality Orientation
 Individual Values
- Allocentric
- Idiocentric
 Self Construal
- Independent
- Interdependent
 Individual Socialization
 Cultural Norms and Rules
Factors that Influence

Cultural Values
Norms, and Rules
 Values
 Value Priorities
 Norms of Behavior
 Non-Verbal
Communication

CulturalValueDifferences
RELATIONAL
Individualism
self-reliance, independence
(selfish)
Collectivism
group interdependence
(mindless follower)
Informality
directness, give and take discussion
(rude and abrupt)
Formality
indirectness, protect "face"
(stiff and impersonal)
Competition
individual achievement
(egotistical, show-off)
Cooperation
group achievement
(avoiding doing work or taking responsibility)
AUTHORITY
Egalitarianism
fairness, belief in equal opportunity
(being picky, on a soapbox)
Hierarchy
privilege of status or rank
(power hungry or avoiding accountability)
TEMPORAL
Use of Time
"Time is money"
(doesn’t get the important things in life)
Passage of Time
"Time is for life"
(lazy and irresponsible)
Change/Future
Adaptability ensures survival
(muckraker, stirs up trouble)
Tradition/Past
Stability ensures survival
(old-school, afraid of change)
ACTIVITY
Action orientation
"Make things happen"
(rushes without thinking)
"Being" orientation
"Let things happen"
(indecisive and slow)
Practicality
Efficiency is always best
(impersonal and unscrupulous)
Idealism
Always maintain principles
(naïve and impractical)

Discussion: My Style
In hearing about personal
factors and value
differences, what would you
describe as your personal
influences or value
priorities? Have you
noticed stark differences
compared to others?

Break

Identifiers, Power,
and Communication
Internalized Oppression/Dominance
Stereotype Threat
Accumulated Impact/
Microaggressions
Code/Mode Switching
Fish Seeing the Water
“Normal” versus “Good”
“Intent” versus “Impact”

Discussion: Dynamics of Power
How is your communication affected by
your identity and power? Using some of
the terminology introduced, discuss with a
partner or group of three what dynamics
cause conflict or misunderstanding.

Tools for Change

Assumptions and Interpretations
• Mental Models
• Ladder of Inference
Belief
Conclusions
Selective Data
Observable Data
• Tools of Action

1. What did you see/hear (raw data)?
2. What are your personal filters (cultural
values, norms, and identifiers)?
3. What was your interpretation of what you
saw/heard (inference)?
4. How did you feel as a result?
5. What do you want?
Checking Assumptions and
Interpretations: Steps to Analyze

Growing Through Mistakes
William Taylor’s Reflective Competence Model

Developmental Model of Intercultural
Sensitivity (DMIS) Schematic

When Impacted

What We’re Thinking and Feeling
During Cross Cultural Conflict
What’s going on?
Did that really
happen? Do they
realize how that
makes me feel?
Should I say
something?

What We End Up Saying
in Cross Cultural Conflict
That was so
offensive/inap
propriate/stu
pid!

Self Advocacy Through Conflict
 Affirm the person, relationship, or rights
 Describe the behavior without judgment
 Explain the emotion or impact and your filters
 Assume positive intent
 Request or suggest different behavior
*** Key Points: timing, I statements, actions not
adjectives, inside feelings not outside feelings***

I think we both have a lot to contribute to this
project. I am noticing that when we are
brainstorming, I am often in the middle of saying
something when you jump in to add your
perspective. I was raised to wait until someone is
finished talking before adding your piece. I am
also someone who easily loses his train of
thought. So when you jump in, I wonder if you
value what I have to say and often feel frustrated
that a coherent thought got derailed. I know
you’re probably just excited to contribute. What
I’d appreciate is if you can make an effort to let me
finish my thought when I am speaking. I’ll try to
be concise so you can contribute your piece.
Self Advocacy Through Conflict: An Example

Self Advocacy Through Conflict: An Example
I appreciate having you as a colleague, and I think
we respect each other’s work. I’d like to talk to
you about something that’s getting in the way of
working really well together. Earlier today, when
we were disagreeing about budgets, I heard you
say, “You’re being overdramatic,” and later, you
called me a “drama queen.” I was hurt when I
heard these things. I am passionate and express
myself openly. As a woman, I am often
misinterpreted as too emotional and that my
concerns are drama rather than real issues. I’d
like to express myself authentically without
fearing judgment. I imagine you didn’t mean for
me to feel that way. Can I ask that you please not
say things like that anymore?

Being A Witness

What We’re Thinking and Feeling
When Witnessing Conflict
I can’t believe this
is happening.
That’s SO not
right. Should I
say something?
Am I butting in?
Would it help?

What We End Up Saying
When Witnessing Conflict

NCBI Effective
Interventions Model
 Reduce Defensiveness
– Tone
– Body Language
– Respect
 Keep the Conversation Going
– Hear Them Out
– Ask Open-Ended Questions
– Set Aside Your Feeling for the Moment
– Dialogue
 Build the Relationship
 Change the Behavior
 Improve Competency

Intervening in Conflict: Examples
 Ask open ended questions
– “He’s being lazy”
– “What does lazy or productive look like to you? Have you talked to him about that?”
 Find out the experience motivating the comment
– “Why can’t they just speak English around here?”
– “It must be hard not to understand what people are saying around you.”
– “She’s impossible to work with!”
– “You seem pretty frustrated. Tell me more about about what’s going on.”
 Use exaggerated humor to highlight what’s going on
(use sparingly)
– “What do gay people think about this issue?”
– “I’m not sure – I’ll go ask. It may take me a while, since there are so many gay people.”
 Join the person and do not make yourself superior
– “They are being so impersonal and cold.”
– “You know, I used to think the same thing. Here’s what I found out that helped me
understand.”

Listening to the Real Message

What Was Said During the Intervention
Those words or
actions are
hurtful to me.
Please stop.

What We Hear During the Intervention
You are a
bad, bad
person, and I
hate you!

What We Should Hear
During the Intervention
You are basically a good
and decent person. As
with all of us, and you
may not know how your
actions are impacting
others. I am going to
give you the gift of
information so that your
intentions and impacts
match up.

When You’re Told About
the Impact You Created
 Listen with full attention
 Don’t try to defend or respond right away
– Take deep breaths
– Acknowledge your feelings
 Prioritize the Impact over Intent
– Apologize for real

When You’re Told About
Impact You Created: Examples
 “I really appreciate your telling me this.”
 “I’m so embarrassed that I did that.”
 “I’m so sorry my words and actions made you feel
that way. No matter what I intended, it hurt you.”
 “I’m pretty overwhelmed right now, and I don’t
want to respond in a way I’d regret. Do you think
you can help me come up with a better way to
handle that situation after I take a few minutes?”
 “I wanted to go back to a moment I don’t think I
handled very well… Can we talk?”

Build Authentic Relationships

Inclusive Communities

“To be culturally effective doesn’t
mean you are an authority in the
values and beliefs of every culture.
What it means is that you hold a
deep respect for cultural differences
and are eager to learn, and willing to
accept, that there are many ways of
viewing the world”
Okokon O. Udo
Cultural Effectiveness

Presenter Information
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
6th Faculty and
Professional Outreach
Seattle Girls’ School
2706 S Jackson Street
Seattle WA 98144
(206) 805-6562
rlee@seattlegirlsschool.org
http://tiny.cc/rosettalee

Communication Resources
• “Stereotype Threat” by Joshua Aronson
• Brenda J. Allen, Difference Matters: Communicating
Social Identity
• William Gudykunst, Cross-Cultural and Intercultural
Comunication
• Milton Bennett, PhD, Intercultural Communication
Institute www.intercultural.org
• “Non-Verbal Communication Across Cultures” by Erica
Hagen, Intercultural Communication Resources
• Thiagi.com
• Thrive! Team Dynamics
• http://www.analytictech.com/mb021/action_science_
history.htm

Microaggression Resources
• Anti-Defamation League
• Brené Brown
• Cross Cultural Connections
(www.CulturesConnecting.com)
• National Coalition Building Institute
• The People’s Institute
• Stirfry Seminars
• Teaching Tolerance

Miscellaneous Resources
• Karen Bradberry and Johnnie Foreman, “Privilege and
Power,” Summer Diversity Institute, National Association
of Independent Schools, 2009
• Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman, Nurture Shock
• Kevin Jennings, GLSEN (Gay Lesbian and Straight Education
Network) www.glsen.org
• Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference
• Johnnie McKinley, “Leveling the Playing Field and Raising
African American Students’ Achievement in Twenty-nine
Urban Classrooms,” New Horizons for Learning,
http://www.newhorizons.org/strategies/differentiated/
mckinley.htm
Michael J Nakkula and Eric Toshalis, Understanding Youth.

University of Washington REI Cross Cultural Communication

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