This document outlines tools and strategies for resolving roommate conflicts, presented by Morgan Scherschel. It begins with replacing common myths with more constructive beliefs when dealing with conflicts. Section II describes helpful communication techniques like using I-statements and setting ground rules. Section III provides scenarios and suggestions for resolving issues like sleep schedules, temperature disputes, trash duties and sharing items. It stresses compromising and establishing clear expectations. The final section reminds RAs to document issues, ensure safety, consult supervisors as needed, and process experiences with support systems to prevent burnout. The overall message is that roommate conflicts can be addressed constructively with the right approach.

1. The Ultimate Roommate
Conflict Toolkit
Presented by Morgan Scherschel
GHD Graham Hall

2. Outline
I. The Basics
II. The Tools
III. The Scenarios
IV. Training Reminders

3. I. The Basics
Think of your worst possible roommate scenario.
You’re not alone!

4. I. The Basics
Think about your beliefs
Myth Replacement
• This is all on me to solve!
• I’m all alone.
• I should be stern and directive,
I know what’s best.
• They’ll never work this out.
• I don’t know what to do. I’m no
good at this.
• It’s about you helping THEM
solve it.
• A supervisor is a phone call
away.
• I should be open and talk about
what the roomies need to talk
about.
• There are steps that the roomies
will go through next.
• Use these tips and coaching from
your GHD!

5. II. The Tools
Helping Skills
Set Ground Rules
• I statements
• Respect
• I am here to help
YOU solve
Gator to Gator
Contract
Use your body
language

6. III. The Scenarios
1. The Sleep Schedule
• Residents are permitted to have a desk lamp
on when overhead lights are off. Safety first!
• Earplugs
• Eye Covers/sleep mask
• Twisting the window shades
the other direction.
• Is there another early/late riser
on the floor that you could mutually swap with?
• Agree to press snooze lower # of times?
Can only sleep in room. Everything else outside room.

7. III. The Scenarios
2. The A/C War
• “In a perfect world, what temp/# would each of you
prefer? How are you going to compromise this?”
• “What times of the days will be at what temp?”
• “What if one of you are away for the weekend?”
• “If either of you want to change the number, how are you
going to communicate that?”

8. III. The Scenarios
3. The Trash Dilemma
• “How often would each of you want the trash to be taken
out? Who will do which day?”
• “How would you know it’s time to take the trash out?”
o When the stuff reaches the top?
o Daily?
o Any kind of smell?
• Help them decide a schedule of how often to take out the
trash.

9. III. The Scenarios
4. Sharing Stuff
• Help make a new rule.
• “What do each of you want from each other?”
• “How do you want to split groceries?”

10. III. The Scenarios
5. Completely different lifestyles
• Or “We have completely different personalities”.
• Break it down. Identify the main issues. Use your techniques
from other scenarios.
• Explain that it’s hard living with another person, and they may
never live happily ever after. They must each give a little to get a
little.
• Suggest each post schedule by desk.
• Different areas for different activities.
• How will they communicate this?

11. Practice
Student A: Student B:
“I work early every morning,
but they always wake me up
when they come in late
around 2am.”
“I can’t help that they’re
always a light sleeper!”

12. When all else fails…
• Even the best mediations can’t be solved.
• RA (you)  GHD  AC/AD  Peer Advocates
• “This sounds like a really tough and frustrating roadblock we
got here. I’m gonna consult my supervisor about it and see if
they can help out.”
• If they ask about transfers/cancellations:
o Mutual swap is always an option!
o Cannot cancel for roommate troubles,
(*Will switch immediately if there is danger*)
o Fill out forms found on housing page.

13. IV. Training things to
remember:
• MEDIA: They may send you texts/tweets/fb messages etc. ,
add these as a note to IR.
• THREATS: ask them directly/name the taboo. Does one roomie
definitely not feel safe? If yes step out and call supervisor.
Safety first!
• BE ALERT: Emotional crisis? Medical attention needed?
Dangerous relationship?
• DOCUMENT and INFORM: call/text/email your supervisor,
write IR, prep to follow up with GHD and residents.

14. Last but not least…
Take care of YOU!
• Process with your GHD what it was like. What would you have
wanted to do differently?
• Seek support from your teammates, friends, and family.
• Use stress relief techniques.
• Talk with a counselor.

15. Go forth and CONQUER!