A research paper describing perfectionism and its implications for those with it. I wrote this during an English composition course at Drew University.

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Paul Pasco
English 1: Section 9
Miss Inskeep
7 November 2006
The Rebirth of Prohibition
Quality of life, often acknowledged synonymously with happiness by mainstream
America, is an integral though habitually disregarded component of existence. Disregard for such
an important aspect of life creates substantial turbulence. Perfectionism, the unhealthy obsession
with achievement, detrimentally affects one’s overall quality of life; this obsession often
prohibits the formation of meaningful, healthy relationships, perpetually diminishes sense of
accomplishment and affects burnout.
Objectively and subjectively, humanity has hotly disputed life’s purpose ever since
humanity could think and reason; as a result, humanity considers life to possess multiple
meanings and purposes. However, the purpose of life to which many subscribe concerns
maximizing one’s enjoyment of life by living life to its fullest; that is, to enjoy life by
surrounding oneself with what many consider things that truly matter in life: friends, family and
meaningful, healthy relationships. Perfectionism is a personality trait that greatly and perpetually
interferes with all of these things. Perfectionistic individuals often link mistakes to general
inadequacy in many or all aspects of life, instead of those individuals that consider mistakes on a
situational basis. Perfectionistic thinking, that is, irrational, disordered and self-defeating
thinking, generates a plethora of stress and anxiety in one’s life; these destructive emotions effect
isolation, defensiveness, even aggressiveness. Perfectionists’ inability to accept mistakes of any
nature occurs owing to the need to ceaselessly protect oneself from potentially damaging

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criticism and critique: “[I]t may be [the] self-critical elements associated with forms of
perfectionism and how individuals react to being critici[z]ed that is [the] key to [the] depressive
symptoms [related to perfectionism]” (Gilbert 1). Incessantly self-critical behavior, the
protection technique perfectionists employ, is unconstructive, fatiguing and tiresome; that is,
constantly critiquing oneself is physically, psychologically and emotionally draining. Ironically,
the generalized stress this destructive behavior inadvertently, yet inevitably creates has a
multitude of both severe and extremely harmful consequences on one’s ability to form
meaningful and healthy relationships. Chronically high levels of stress and anxiety, in and of
themselves, cause a great deal of strife in one’s life. Furthermore, the general, educated
American populace widely acknowledges that high levels of stress and anxiety play a
predominant role in the creation of many psychological disorders. Two such disorders include
major depressive disorder, a depressive disorder, and obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD, an
anxiety disorder. However, even the mere presence of extreme stress and anxiety, even in the
absence of depressive or anxiety disorders, dramatically interferes with one’s ability to function
and similarly interferes with one’s ability to form meaningful, healthy relationships.
Perfectionistic individuals are not only often overstressed, overtired and overworked, but often
are very defensive and retaliatory in conflicts, a behavior stemming from disproportionately
angry reaction to a lack of perfection in one’s life. This makes under individuals feel
apprehensive, and rightly so; correspondingly, individuals avoid becoming close to
perfectionistic individuals, because such individuals are so defensive, inflexible and unwilling to
psychologically and emotionally expose themselves for a variety of reasons, although fear of
rejection is one of the most common. In essence, perfectionists often believe that one must be
perfect to make oneself worthy of love, affection or acceptance: “Socially prescribed

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perfectionism is the tendency to perceive, either correctly or incorrectly, that significant others
demand perfection from the self. In the case of a depressed college student, this could be
reflected by a belief that a parent, boyfriend or girlfriend, or society in general is placing pressure
on the self to be perfect.” (Martin 2). This fear of rejection from one’s present loved ones or
one’s potential significant others results in a great deal of distress, even bitterness and hostility at
times. Fear of rejection often causes one to feel that one’s situation is unfair because of the
extremely high, obstinate and persistently-perfect standards they perceive as required for them to
meet. Perception of a situation, circumstance or mistake often plays an integral role in how one
feels about, deals with and resolves that situation, circumstance or mistake. Perfectionists
generally cannot acknowledge that they will never be able to control most of what happens in the
world, no matter how perfect they are; this problem, one of perception, rather than the presence
of perfection, or more accurately lack thereof, is the biggest obstacle in overcoming
perfectionistic thinking. However, if one is aware of this idea, even one is extremely
perfectionistic, one can frequently make an effective effort to control the way in which one
perceives the world; perfectionists are often incapable of doing this. Perfectionists, more so than
anything else, struggle with their misperceptions of situations, circumstances and problems; this
distorts their overall view of life. This characteristically unhealthy and isolating self-protection
technique, seemingly an act of self-preservation to perfectionists, greatly reduces one’s ability to
become close to others; that is, perfectionism reduces one’s ability to form meaningful and
healthy relationships.
In addition, perfectionists experience fear of failure in an abnormally and unhealthily
strong manner because of their inflexibility, a direct result of an unwillingness to accept anything
less than perfection as an acceptable result. As such, perfectionists fear failing at mostly

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everything, because failure constitutes any result inferior to a perfect one, if a perfect one in fact
even exists. These constant, intense and existential fears of failing at anything and everything,
which often include rejection, rapidly drain one’s physical, psychological and emotional energy.
Moreover, as a perfectionistic individual never views oneself as perfect, any well-deserved
accomplishment that is fairly good, very good or even extraordinary is worthless, as it is not is
perfect. Although there are many thoughts that contribute to the draining effects of
perfectionism, this thought is much more draining than many others, as it always causes one to
doubt one’s worth. This thought pattern is detrimental to the way in which one lives one’s life, in
that interpreting life in this manner causes life to seem like an exceedingly long, draining and
frustrating societal, self, peer and even parental evaluation. In fact, several studies have studied
the different parental relationships and the instance, type and severity of perfectionism: “Several
theorists have speculated on the origins of perfectionism, with most of the attention focused on
the nature of parent-child relationships and interactions. Missildine (1963) viewed perfectionism
as a universally negative characteristic and argued that perfectionists tend to have perfectionistic
parents; such children experience approval as contingent on meeting the high perfectionistic
expectations of their parents, which leads to their own strivings to meet unreasonably high self-
expectations” (Rice 2). This study alludes to a logical, strong but not entirely conclusive causal
relationship between parenting styles and types of perfectionism in children. The study asserts
that children that have perfectionistic parents also tend to be perfectionists themselves, which is
not only a logical assumption but is quantitatively supported by the mathematical evidence
provided in the study. Other studies have likewise linked parental relationships to the presence of
perfections associated problems: “[…] insecurely attached children [i.e., children insecurely
attached to their parents] are more likely to become anxious, aggressive, or depressed, or to

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develop difficulties in close interpersonal relations” (Bezruchka 87). This study indicates that
children that are insecurely attached to their parents, which according to the study concerning
parenting styles is a result of one’s possession of perfectionistic parents, are more likely to
develop problems representative of disordered, perfectionistic thinking. These problems, which
are interrelated, only add to the strain on society’s masses, as they affect society’s most young
and unprepared individuals. This problem, as a result of its effects on children, has snowballed,
because the vicious cycle begun by the parents of these children has been further perpetuated by
those individuals’ children. Undeniably, many factors other than parenting styles contribute to
the formation or lack of perfectionism in parents’ children. However, according to this study,
parenting styles are a factor, and moreover an important one in the presence of perfectionism in
parents’ children.
Perfectionism is furthermore an unhealthy trait as it exceedingly often tends to result in
feelings of extreme burnout at many points in one’s life. To make an important distinction,
perfectionism is a disordered trait; that is, perfectionism is the disordered form of a positive,
healthy and beneficial trait known as “healthy striving” (Counseling 2). In essence, one can
describe the difference between these two respective personality traits, the work attitudes
associated with healthy striving and perfectionism, in that healthy strivers usually feel in control
of their own self-concept, they do not seem to suffer as much from mistakes or failures as
perfectionists do. This is true because the “self-concept of perfectionists is, on the whole, largely
based on the way others value their efforts and work” (Counseling 2). This component of
perfectionism leaves perfectionists extremely vulnerable to criticism, which can and does easily
wound those not aware of it. While one can desensitize oneself to constructive criticism without
reacting in an inappropriately defensive or irrational manner, this is difficult to do. The ability to

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process constructive criticism objectively requires much skill in introspection and self-
awareness. Moreover, these skills do not come easily to most and are therefore usually difficult
to employ; as a result, perfectionists remain vulnerable to criticism. Furthermore, perfectionists
also experience work obligation, rather than work motivation. This obligation to work and its
associated anxiety can infiltrate all aspects of one’s life. For example, in recent perfectionism
research studies conducted since 2002, a correlation between “unrealistic standards,
perfectionistic motivations for others and socially prescribed perfectionism (i.e., the belief that
significant others expect oneself to be perfect) positively predict interpretation anxiety,
computational self-concept and fear of asking for help” (Influence of Personality 3). This study
shows a positive relationship between perfectionism, unhealthy beliefs, expectations and anxiety.
This tremendous and excessive anxiety about and oversensitivity to criticism causes one to feel
chronically burnt out, as one never allows oneself to rest for a fear of an unpleasant consequence,
often a fear of criticism. In addition to the exhausting effect of this perfectionism-based fear,
perfectionism also usually results in a great deal of procrastination in completing one’s tasks,
however minor, a factor that contributes heavily to burnout: “Results [of this scientific study]
suggest that perfect behavior for procrastinators may be a strategic act of self-presentation aimed
at [‘]getting along with others[’]” (Ferrari 1). Perfectionists, intrinsically determined to be
perfect, will delay the completion of many tasks in a feeble attempt to eventually get those tasks
done just-right. This behavior is commonly referred to as procrastination, although it is generally
not considered this by perfectionists. In essence, to ensure that a perfectionist can “get along with
others”, that perfectionist will delay completing a task, whatever it may be, until it can be done
perfectly. This behavior is motivated by the belief that others will reject the perfectionist if he or
she does not measure up to others’ standards. Fundamentally, the physically, psychologically and

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emotionally draining effects of perfectionism cause one to feel chronically burnt out; that is, the
constant stress and anxiety perfectionism generates from its inherently problematic nature
frequently causes one to feel burnt out.
In addition to it’s the general unhealthiness of perfectionism and its associated anxiety,
perfectionism additionally and detrimentally impacts one’s overall physical, psychological and
emotional well-being. Although perfectionism is clearly an unhealthy psychological trait,
compared to healthy-striving, many individuals often aspire to perfectionists’ standards. This
occurs from the comforting belief that perfectionism causes one to become fulfilled, happy and
successful. However, because of its enormously draining nature, perfectionism ironically
destroys, rather than secures one’s potential fulfillment, happiness and success. “The results of 3
separate stepwise multiple regression analyses showed that (a) emotional exhaustion is uniquely
predicted by emotional stability; (b) depersonalization is predicted by emotional stability,
extraversion, and intellect/autonomy; and (c) personal accomplishment is predicted by
extraversion and emotional stability. In addition, some of the basic personality factors moderated
the relationship between relative number of negative experiences and burnout, suggesting that
personality may help to protect against know risks of developing burnout […]” (Bakker 1). As
evidenced in this study, mathematical analyses indicate that emotional stability is an accurate
predictor of emotional exhaustion; that is, emotional stability is an accurate predictor of burnout.
In essence, this study suggests that those individuals that are emotionally stable, such as healthy
strivers, will predictably experience emotional exhaustion, or burnout, to a lesser degree those
that are not emotionally stable, specifically perfectionists in this study. Although numerous
factors other than emotional stability by itself undoubtedly influence emotional exhaustion, this

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study effectively identifies the important relationship between emotional stability and the degree
to which one experiences emotional exhaustion.
Perception of a situation, relationship, conflict, circumstance or mistake often plays an
integral role in how one feels about, deals with and resolves such things. Perfectionists generally
cannot acknowledge that they will never be able to control most of what happens in the world, no
matter how perfect they are; this problem, one of perception, rather than the presence of
perfection, or more accurately lack thereof, is the biggest obstacle in overcoming perfectionistic
thinking. Perfectionists, more so than anything else, struggle with their misperceptions of the
world; these lend themselves to a distorted view of life. However, regardless of how extreme,
overwhelming or out-of-control perfectionism can be at times, perfectionism is not something
that is entirely uncontrollable. With awareness of a problem comes understanding of the
problem. With understanding of a problem comes acceptance and acknowledgement of the
problem. With acceptance and acknowledgment of a problem comes intent to resolve or fix the
problem. With intent to fix or resolve a problem comes direct action aimed at resolving the
problem and with direct problem-aimed action comes resolution.

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Works Cited
Gilbert, P.. Investigating relationships between perfectionism, forms and functions of self-
criticism, and sensitivity to put-down. 22 June 2006. Mental Health Research Unit,
Kingsway House, Kingsway Hospital, Derby DE22 3LZ, UK. 9 Oct. 2006
<http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B6V9F-4K7NHCV-
[…]>
Martin, Thomas R.. Personality Correlates of Depression and Health Symptoms: A Test of a
Self-Regulation Model. 19 April 2002. York University, University of British Columbia,
Erindale College, University of Toronto and McMaster University, Ontario Institute for
Studies in Education. 9 Oct. 2006
<http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B6WM0-45MG4MB -
[…]>
Perfectionism, Relationships with Parents, and Self-Esteem. September 2006. University of
Texas Press. 9 Nov. 2006
< http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail?vid=4&hid=2&sid=4366f9f4-d6b7-414d-814b-
c5c74be08bbe%40sessionmgr102>
Bezruchka, Stephen. Take Back Your Time. San Francisco:
Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.

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Counseling Center: Self-Help Brochures. Univ. of Illionois. 20 Sep. 2006.
<http://www.couns.uiuc.edu/Brochures/perfecti.htm>
The influence of personality on HE students’ confidence in their academic abilities. 25 May
2006. School of Psychology, Univ. of Leicester. 20 Sep. 2006
< http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B6V9F-4KCPTY2
[…]>
Ferrari, R. Joseph. Procrastinators and perfect behavior: An exploratory factor analysis of self-
presentation, self-awareness, and self-handicapping components. 27 August 2004.
Center for Life Studies, Cazenovia College, USA. 9 Oct. 2006
<http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B6WM0-4D62M08
[…]>
The Relationship Between the Big Five Personality Factors and Burnout: A Study Among
Volunteer Counselors. 17 February 2005. Department of Social and Organizational
Psychology, Utrecht University, The Netherlands. 9 Nov. 2006
<http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail?vid=4&hid=113&sid=51dca664-6b3d-412e-
8e27-c78aacbccbf3%40sessionmgr104>