The document summarizes Lieven Migerode's presentation on the "no conclusion intervention" for couples in conflict. The intervention involves having couples identify areas of difference that lead to conflicts, qualify them as trivial or important, and decide whether to come to a conclusion on each issue or let issues remain unresolved. The therapist helps couples make choices, stay with their choices, and handle differences respectfully without forcing conclusions. The goal is to have couples dialogue without one view dominating, in order to reduce anxiety and build understanding between partners over time.
1) The document discusses concerns about the current mental health system including over-diagnosis, over-medication, and an over-emphasis on the brain.
2) It considers whether revolutions aiming for radical change are truly successful or if the current system may be the best available. It questions where change should aim to go.
3) The document explores concepts like utopia, power and resistance, therapy as liberation, and dialogue, highlighting their complex, tension-filled natures that resist simple definitions.
Here the partners validate each other's perspective and illustrate how they
coordinate their approach to communication about the donor conception based on the
children's questions. Sara emphasizes letting the children take the lead, which Lisa
supports. They laugh together about the ease of the situation with Tim so far.
Hanna: yes, I notice you coordinate very well on how to approach this
Sara: yes, we discussed it thoroughly beforehand
Lisa: yes, we discussed it a lot
Sara: to be consistent
Lisa: yes, to be consistent in our story
Sara: exactly
Hanna: thank you for sharing this experience
Sara: you're welcome
Lisa: you're
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- Hermeneutic phenomenology developed by Martin Heidegger which rejects the possibility of bracketing and focuses on interpretive understanding of human existence or "Being-in-the-world."
- Existential phenomenology of Jean-Paul Sartre and Maurice Merleau-Ponty which studies pre-reflective lived experience and the relationship between subject and world.
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1) The document discusses concerns about the current mental health system including over-diagnosis, over-medication, and an over-emphasis on the brain.
2) It considers whether revolutions aiming for radical change are truly successful or if the current system may be the best available. It questions where change should aim to go.
3) The document explores concepts like utopia, power and resistance, therapy as liberation, and dialogue, highlighting their complex, tension-filled natures that resist simple definitions.
Here the partners validate each other's perspective and illustrate how they
coordinate their approach to communication about the donor conception based on the
children's questions. Sara emphasizes letting the children take the lead, which Lisa
supports. They laugh together about the ease of the situation with Tim so far.
Hanna: yes, I notice you coordinate very well on how to approach this
Sara: yes, we discussed it thoroughly beforehand
Lisa: yes, we discussed it a lot
Sara: to be consistent
Lisa: yes, to be consistent in our story
Sara: exactly
Hanna: thank you for sharing this experience
Sara: you're welcome
Lisa: you're
This document provides an overview of phenomenology as both a philosophy and methodology. It discusses the key thinkers and schools of phenomenology, including:
- Transcendental phenomenology founded by Edmund Husserl which uses descriptive methods like phenomenological reduction and bracketing to study the structures of experience.
- Hermeneutic phenomenology developed by Martin Heidegger which rejects the possibility of bracketing and focuses on interpretive understanding of human existence or "Being-in-the-world."
- Existential phenomenology of Jean-Paul Sartre and Maurice Merleau-Ponty which studies pre-reflective lived experience and the relationship between subject and world.
This document discusses key concepts in interpersonal communication including empathy, self-disclosure, communication climate, acceptance, conflict resolution strategies like nonviolent communication, and assertive versus passive and aggressive behaviors. It provides definitions and examples of these concepts to improve understanding of effective interpersonal interactions. The document is intended as a guide to developing strong interpersonal skills for situations like interviews, group discussions, and presentations.
The document outlines Stephen Covey's "Seven Habits Paradigm" which describes habits of effective people. It includes diagrams illustrating the habits and principles. The habits are: 1) Be Proactive, 2) Begin with the End in Mind, 3) Put First Things First, 4) Think Win-Win, 5) Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood, 6) Synergize, and 7) Sharpen the Saw. Diagrams show how the habits build upon each other and lead to continuous self-improvement. Effective people live according to principles within their control while ineffective people react based on external factors.
The document outlines Stephen Covey's seven habits of highly effective people paradigm. It includes diagrams and explanations of the seven habits, which are: be proactive, begin with the end in mind, put first things first, think win-win, seek first to understand then to be understood, synergize, and sharpen the saw. It also discusses the four dimensions of renewal and the upward spiral process of continuous improvement. Additionally, it outlines seven principles upon which the habits are based, including independence, interdependence, win-win agreements, understanding others, synergistic communication, and continuous self-renewal.
Introduction to the Myers-Briggs Personality TypeSabrina Goff
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Seek first to understand, Then Be Understoodmrsabercrombie
The document discusses effective communication skills, particularly listening skills. It describes 5 poor communication styles: spacing out, pretend listening, selective listening, word listening, and self-centered listening. Self-centered listening includes advising, judging, and probing others. The goal is unselfish listening where one is genuinely interested in understanding the other person. Effective communication also relies on non-verbal cues like body language, tone of voice, and eye contact. "I-statements" are recommended over "you-statements" to avoid placing blame when providing feedback or resolving issues. Overall, the document emphasizes the importance of listening to understand others before seeking to be understood, and effective communication is key to leadership.
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The no conclusion intervention for couples in conflict
1. The no conclusion intervention
for couples in conflict
Dialogical conference Leuven
march 8 2013
Lieven Migerode
2. Migerode, L. & Hooghe, A., (2012). “I love you” How to Migerode, L. (2012). The no conclusion intervention for
couples in conflict. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy. Doi:
understand love in couple therapy. Exploring love in context. 10,111/jmft,12.004
Journal of Family Therapy, 34, 371-386. doi: 10.1111/j.1467-
6427.2011.00557.x
lieven.migerode@uzleuven.be
12/03/2013 Lieven Migerode Context UZLeuven 2
3. Change the other Change the other
Anxiety reduction REACTION REACTION Anxiety reduction
How do I participate in the impasse How do I participate in the impasse
Looking in the mirror, feel. Looking in the mirror, feel.
Own changes, risk taking. Own changes, risk taking.
ACTION
Speaking and listening
Speaking and listening DIFFERENCE
Validating (of risk taking) Love/Bonding over Validating (of risk taking)
difference
Falling and getting up Falling and getting up
Love/growth
Figure 7 3
4. • Love is at the core of couples
• Couples are constituted in dialogue
• You are always different/unique
• When stuck couples get dua=logical
– Twice monological
– Seemingly devide tensions over the partners
• One hour time: lets get do-a-logical
5. • We can only see well with the
heart. The essence is invisible
for the eyes.(The little prince,
de Saint Exupéry, 1943,).
Lieven Migerode Context UZLeuven
6. Love
Always circular
Give opposing force
Knowing and Mystery
•…
Stability and Change
• growth…
Autonomy and Bonding
•…
Migerode,L. & Hooghe, A. (In press). How to understand love in couple therapy. Journal of Family Therapy.
7. How to visualise opposing forces?
closeness distance closeness
distance
Lieven Migerode, Context UZLeuven, IFTA
march 2011.
8. No conclusion intervention exercise:
•Both partners , seperately,
•name down two areas of difference that lead to conflict.
Step 1
•Seperately, qualify the conflicting differences either as trivial or important
•Important = touching on ‘who you are’
•Important= touching on ‘who your are as a couple’
Step 2 •Important=touching on ‘how the world is’
•Trivial= neither of the above applies.
•Exchange the areas of difference
•Ask question to understand what is named
•Qualify the areas your partner chose
Step 3 •Four kinds of differences ensue: Trivial-Trivial; trivial-Important; Important-Trivial, Important-Important
Lieven Migerode, Context UZLeuven, IFTA
march 2011.
9. Trivial- Important
Decide not to come to a conclusion
Make ample time.
Trivial-Trivial
Explain Trivial/
Take 5’ time Listen as good as you can, show understanding
Explain Important, ,
Solve it!
Listen as good as you can, show understanding
Use cultural methods
Put aside
Life is to short
Let it Rise.
Start all over
No conclusion intervention
Migerode
Important– Trvial Important-Important
Decide not to come to a conclusion
Make ample time. Decide not to come to a conclusion
Explain Trivial/ Make ample time.
Listen as good as you can, show understanding Explain important/
Explain Important , Listen as good as you can, show understanding
Listen as good as you can, show understanding Explain Important, ,
Put aside Listen as good as you can, show understanding
Let it Rise. Put aside
Start all over Let it Rise.
11. Therapist actions
• Help partners to make choices
• Help partners to stay with choices
• Help partners to stick to outline
• Help partners to change their choices if
necesarry
• Help partners to show what they understand
• Ask : Is there more you want to explain?
• Ask : Is there more you want to know?
13. Love absent in MFT.
• Love is a noun and a verb, a thing and
an action, a concept and an organized
set of behavior, and a subject that
clinicians generally avoid (Levine, 2007)
• Love is rarely directly addressed in
couple therapy and investigated in
couple research (Riehl-Emde, e.a.
2003)
• Love about which is relatively little
written in couple family therapy
literature (Grunebaum, 1997)
• In general psychotherapist have a
conflicting relationship to love (Willi,
1997)
• The lack of attention in the marriage
therapy literature to romantic love and
sexual attraction (Roberts, 1992)
http://www.rein-art.be/
•
Lieven Migerode Context UZLeuven
14. Love important for couples
• Former spouses name ‘the death of love’ as
primary cause of divorce (Gigy en Kelly, 1992,
Kayser, 1993; In Berscheid 2010, p 6)
• Love matters not only because it can make our lives
better but also because it is a major source of
misery and pain and can make life worse (Reis &
Aron, 2008).
• A love relationship has become the central
emotional relationship in most people’s lives
(Johnson, 2008).
• The couples assessment of their love was the first
and foremost variable for predicting whether a
couple belonged to the group with high or low level
well being= a greater degree of love was associated
with a greater well being (Riehhl-Emde, 2003).
• Being in love seems to be me of greater importance
for the prognosis of marriage the marriage
happiness and satisfaction (Willi, 1997).
• The most frequent reason for both marriage and
divorce is love and the loss of love (Scoresby, 1977
in Roberts, 1992).
http://www.rein-art.be/
Lieven Migerode Context UZLeuven
15. Do we know what love is?
• Because out of the millions, trillions,
perhaps even centillions of sentences
written about love , very few can stand
alone and still strike us a “true”. One of
those few is “Love is a word”.
(Bersheid,1995)
• Love is synthetic rather than
analytic.(Sternberg 1998)
http://www.rein-art.be/
Lieven Migerode Context UZLeuven
16. Can we then talk about love in
therapy?
• “.Despite the fact that love is one of the
most polysemous words in English
language, people generally know what the
person using the word is trying to
communicate.” (Bersheid & Meyers, 1996,
p.171).
• Theoretically we find support for this in
the work of Fehr & Russel (1991). They
propose that love is one of those concepts
that can best be understood in a
prototypical way. People ‘know’ if an
experience matches a concept through its
resemblance with a model, a prototype.
(Migerode & Hooghe, in press). http://www.rein-art.be/
Lieven Migerode Context UZLeuven