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28 Reading People 
takes months or even years to get past a first impression and more accu-rately 
see the complex patterns of a person's behavior. 
EVERYTHING MUST BE SEEN IN CONTEXT— 
NOT IN THE ABSTRACT 
As William Shakespeare aptly noted, "All the world's a stage, and all the 
men and women merely players. . . . One man in his time plays many 
parts." To accurately identify patterns in people's traits and behaviors, 
you need to consider the stage upon which they appear. If you told me 
simply that a young man wears a large hoop earring, you couldn't expect 
me to tell you what that signifies. It might make a great parlor game, but 
in real life I would never hazard a guess based on so little information. If 
the man is from a culture in which most young men wear large hoop ear-rings, 
it might mean he's a conformist. If, on the other hand, he's the son 
of a Philadelphia lawyer, he may be rebellious. If he plays in a rock band, 
maybe he's trendy. 
Think again about the jigsaw puzzle. A single blue puzzle piece could 
be part of the sky, a pool of water, a building, the side of a truck, or a 
man's shirt. Relying on a single trait to predict the beliefs, character, or 
probable actions of a complex human being is like picking up that one 
piece and proclaiming it to be the left side of a blue 1982 Ford pickup. 
Good luck! 
To illustrate the point, I'll describe some characteristics of a man I 
knew almost ten years ago. When I first met him, he was sitting at a 
table. He was thin and somewhat hunched over; he looked like a bird 
with a broken wing, afraid and isolated. He had a nervous smile and an 
awkward way of doing just about everything. Soon after, when he got to 
know me better, he began drawing pictures for me, usually of small ani-mals. 
Rabbits were his favorite. He was quite a good artist. 
You probably imagine a small, timid man who wouldn't hurt a fly— 
but I'll add a few more pieces to the puzzle: The table this man was 
hunched over was the defense counsel's table in the courtroom where he 
was on trial. He was handcuffed at his wrists and ankles. He was afraid, 
isolated, and nervous because he was facing the death penalty for killing 
thirteen mostly elderly women. And why did he draw me pictures of 
small animals? I don't know. I suppose it was because he liked to draw 
and it kept his mind off the trial. He was Richard Ramirez, "the Night 
Stalker," who remains on death row today. 
Always bear in mind, there are many interpretations of almost every 
aspect of a person's appearance, body language, environment, vocal in-

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Reading people how to understand people and predict their behavior -anytime anyplace44

  • 1. 28 Reading People takes months or even years to get past a first impression and more accu-rately see the complex patterns of a person's behavior. EVERYTHING MUST BE SEEN IN CONTEXT— NOT IN THE ABSTRACT As William Shakespeare aptly noted, "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players. . . . One man in his time plays many parts." To accurately identify patterns in people's traits and behaviors, you need to consider the stage upon which they appear. If you told me simply that a young man wears a large hoop earring, you couldn't expect me to tell you what that signifies. It might make a great parlor game, but in real life I would never hazard a guess based on so little information. If the man is from a culture in which most young men wear large hoop ear-rings, it might mean he's a conformist. If, on the other hand, he's the son of a Philadelphia lawyer, he may be rebellious. If he plays in a rock band, maybe he's trendy. Think again about the jigsaw puzzle. A single blue puzzle piece could be part of the sky, a pool of water, a building, the side of a truck, or a man's shirt. Relying on a single trait to predict the beliefs, character, or probable actions of a complex human being is like picking up that one piece and proclaiming it to be the left side of a blue 1982 Ford pickup. Good luck! To illustrate the point, I'll describe some characteristics of a man I knew almost ten years ago. When I first met him, he was sitting at a table. He was thin and somewhat hunched over; he looked like a bird with a broken wing, afraid and isolated. He had a nervous smile and an awkward way of doing just about everything. Soon after, when he got to know me better, he began drawing pictures for me, usually of small ani-mals. Rabbits were his favorite. He was quite a good artist. You probably imagine a small, timid man who wouldn't hurt a fly— but I'll add a few more pieces to the puzzle: The table this man was hunched over was the defense counsel's table in the courtroom where he was on trial. He was handcuffed at his wrists and ankles. He was afraid, isolated, and nervous because he was facing the death penalty for killing thirteen mostly elderly women. And why did he draw me pictures of small animals? I don't know. I suppose it was because he liked to draw and it kept his mind off the trial. He was Richard Ramirez, "the Night Stalker," who remains on death row today. Always bear in mind, there are many interpretations of almost every aspect of a person's appearance, body language, environment, vocal in-