Having experienced this very thing today, I would like to share some ways to overcome these feelings of guilt and shame and move back to our functional adult self.
Cognitive distortions are the everyday errors that we make in translating the thoughts, ideas, and things we see around us, using words. These are 10 of the top cases of distorted thinking that we have all made, at one time or another. melaniecgallo.com
21 Warning Signs of Unhealthy Intimate RelationshipMoshe Ratson
Here are 21 warning signs of unhealthy dynamics in intimate relationships that can’t be ignored. It is not easy to accept the difficulties in your relationship, but the sooner you face reality, the sooner you can move forward and build healthy fulfilling and lasting relationship.
From 2011 Institute for Emotional Intelligence (EI) San Antonio, TX ---
Baggage Check. Have you ever thought about the old adage of "carrying baggage"? Well to be effective, leaders must inventory that baggage and check it at the door. Without attention to Emotional Intelligence, that baggage becomes the barrier to success. Join this presentation to explore avenues to check your own baggage and explore resistances to becoming fully self-aware and effective. Participants learn the activities used by Dr. Beavers in the university classroom to explore resistances to self-awareness.
Trying to conform only steals your potential.
Standing out is the sole method to reach your best potential. Fitting in will cause you to make false presumptions and improper choices. It’s impossible to follow the herd and lead all at once.
Read the complete article here - http://www.isaiahhankel.com/how-to-avoid-groupthink-and-destroy-your-herd-mentality
Cognitive distortions are the everyday errors that we make in translating the thoughts, ideas, and things we see around us, using words. These are 10 of the top cases of distorted thinking that we have all made, at one time or another. melaniecgallo.com
21 Warning Signs of Unhealthy Intimate RelationshipMoshe Ratson
Here are 21 warning signs of unhealthy dynamics in intimate relationships that can’t be ignored. It is not easy to accept the difficulties in your relationship, but the sooner you face reality, the sooner you can move forward and build healthy fulfilling and lasting relationship.
From 2011 Institute for Emotional Intelligence (EI) San Antonio, TX ---
Baggage Check. Have you ever thought about the old adage of "carrying baggage"? Well to be effective, leaders must inventory that baggage and check it at the door. Without attention to Emotional Intelligence, that baggage becomes the barrier to success. Join this presentation to explore avenues to check your own baggage and explore resistances to becoming fully self-aware and effective. Participants learn the activities used by Dr. Beavers in the university classroom to explore resistances to self-awareness.
Trying to conform only steals your potential.
Standing out is the sole method to reach your best potential. Fitting in will cause you to make false presumptions and improper choices. It’s impossible to follow the herd and lead all at once.
Read the complete article here - http://www.isaiahhankel.com/how-to-avoid-groupthink-and-destroy-your-herd-mentality
15 Power Packed Action Tips To Empower You To Be A Leader In Your Organization. Inspirational advice that will help you embrace your strengths, be courageous and find success in everything you do at work and in your personal life.
How to build self confidence in 5 easy stepsKimberly Reid
These 5 steps will help you to boost your confidence. Believe in the power within and you’ll notice how you attract and influence others. Always reward when you achieve something.
"The reputation you have with yourself – your self-esteem – is the single most important factor for a fulfilling life." - Psychologist Nathaniel Branden. What is self-esteem and how can we encourage a healthy self-concept and positive self-regard?
In January of this year (2017) I read Brené Brown’s last book and while reading ‘Rising Strong’ it struck me that it partly describes the Creative Interchange Process. The subtitle of the Dutch translation of her book: “the Wisdom of Falling and Standing Up” indicates that this book mainly covers the left side of my Crucial Dialogue Model (Crucial dialogues being one of the many applications of Creative Interchange).
Inspired by Brené Brown’s book I wrote five columns covering the complete ‘Rising Strong’ Process. First in Dutch and due to a comment of Mitch Kotula I started to translate them into (‘my kind of’) English. The last two columns describe the right part of the Crucial Dialogue Model, which is less covered in ‘Rising Strong’.
Those five columns, that where originally published on LinkedIn are now presented on Slide ‘to whom it concerns’ as a paper: The ‘Rising Strong’ Process.
Creatively,
Johan
This speech is an attempt I made to understand through an objective lens how we as a people form impressions of one another. I delivered this speech at toastmasters meeting.
15 Power Packed Action Tips To Empower You To Be A Leader In Your Organization. Inspirational advice that will help you embrace your strengths, be courageous and find success in everything you do at work and in your personal life.
How to build self confidence in 5 easy stepsKimberly Reid
These 5 steps will help you to boost your confidence. Believe in the power within and you’ll notice how you attract and influence others. Always reward when you achieve something.
"The reputation you have with yourself – your self-esteem – is the single most important factor for a fulfilling life." - Psychologist Nathaniel Branden. What is self-esteem and how can we encourage a healthy self-concept and positive self-regard?
In January of this year (2017) I read Brené Brown’s last book and while reading ‘Rising Strong’ it struck me that it partly describes the Creative Interchange Process. The subtitle of the Dutch translation of her book: “the Wisdom of Falling and Standing Up” indicates that this book mainly covers the left side of my Crucial Dialogue Model (Crucial dialogues being one of the many applications of Creative Interchange).
Inspired by Brené Brown’s book I wrote five columns covering the complete ‘Rising Strong’ Process. First in Dutch and due to a comment of Mitch Kotula I started to translate them into (‘my kind of’) English. The last two columns describe the right part of the Crucial Dialogue Model, which is less covered in ‘Rising Strong’.
Those five columns, that where originally published on LinkedIn are now presented on Slide ‘to whom it concerns’ as a paper: The ‘Rising Strong’ Process.
Creatively,
Johan
This speech is an attempt I made to understand through an objective lens how we as a people form impressions of one another. I delivered this speech at toastmasters meeting.
Our company has supplied high quality products in esthetic markets. Also we have our own brand, Phy-mongShe, which is well-known product in Korean salon & spa market.
It is regarded as a No. 1 brand in a domestic Esthetic market and provides necessary products for the management of salon programs and clinic so far.
This publication is about the strategy and tactical priorities on the path toward visa-free regime for the countries of the Eastern Partnership (EaP) with the European Union. Assessments and recommendations developed by the expert group disclose available mechanisms and opportunities for further visa liberalisation. The research is aimed for strengthening and further professionalisation of international public impact and lobbying of the freedom of movement in Europe. Famous European think tanks and NGOs such as European Policy Centre (Brussels) and European Stability Initiative (Berlin-Brussels-Istanbul) contributed to this project.
Why read motivational sayings? For motivation! You might need a bit, if you can use last year’s list of goals this year because it’s as good as new. All of us can benefit from inspirational thoughts
7 Ways Anxiety Might Be Slowly Eating Away Your LifeKarthik Karthi
There’s a good chance that we’ve all experienced feelings of
anxiety in response to real or perceived threats at one time or
another. For most people, these feelings are normal as the brain
is hard-wired to caution you at times of danger, change and the
unknown.
In fact, in many situations, experiencing a certain level of anxiety and stress can help boost your performance in specific tasks. For instance, a person might experience a heightened level of anxiety
the days leading up to a public event and that’s a completely
normal reaction.
Psychologists believe that anxiety is your body’s natural response to
stress and that this stress triggers a system in the brain that accentuates your performance. So, a little anxiety now and then is okay and might be your body’s way of preparing for an impending change.
Most of us believe that the more we learn the more we grow. Harrison however believes that one of the most important forms of growth we can undertake is unlearning. All learning we do, in a sense involves unlearning. The more we can unlearn, the more likely we are to experience the sense of growth and progress we so desire.
Exploring one’s shadow is no easy undertaking. The idea of getting to know what Jung referred to as, “That which I do not wish to be” is rarely considered an exciting prospect. Yet we implore all leaders to be courageous and get to know and learn to work with their shadow. It is only when we do the work to make the unconscious conscious, that we are able to build true compassion for ourselves and others; freeing us to become the leaders we were born to become.
James Hollis is a Jungian analyst, author and lecturer whose work has inspired and influenced us at Reboot. In this episode Jerry and James talk in depth about the Jungian concept of shadow, how shadow shows up in leadership, and what we can do once we become aware of our shadow.
Your Soul Reading Reveals The Path That Your Soul Is On At This Point In Your...Sanjeevkumar2957
It Reveals The Challenges That May Be Blocking You On Your Soul’s Journey
And The Opportunities Available To Help You At This Time in Your Life...
Get Your FREE Soul Reading Below…
Inner Strength Manifesto – The #1 Secret to Constantly Generate Positive Energy, Manifest Abundance and Realize Your Inner Potential. Inside this eBook, you will discover the topics about what 95% of the people do not know about personal growth, “no matter what”, little known way to: self assurance!, how positivity enables you to achieve more in life, how to be a rockstar and attract people effortlessly, manifestation at its’ core, 2 simple ways to practice manifestation and so much more!
7 Ways Anxiety Might Be Slowly Eating Away Your Life.pdfKrista A. Davis
Introducing 7 Ways Anxiety Might Be Slowly Eating Away Your Life. Inside this eBook, you will discover the topics about it is natural to feel anxious, overthinking and obsessive thoughts, how our brains respond to anxiety, negative and unwanted thoughts, lack of self-esteem and fear of rejection, self-esteem and the fear of rejection, phobias and traumas, anxiety doesn't exist in isolation, workplace anxiety, the workplace is no exception, coping with anxiety at work, work at creating a work-life balance, social anxiety, eating disorder and so much more!
7 Ways Anxiety Might Be Slowly Eating Away Your Life.pdfNisa T
Anxiety: the unwelcome guest that overstays its welcome. It's the feeling of being trapped in a room with no windows, no doors, and no escape. It's the voice in your head that tells you everything will go wrong, even when things are going well. Anxiety is a rollercoaster ride that you never asked to go on, but here you are, white-knuckling through the twists and turns. But guess what? You're not alone. Millions of people ride this same rollercoaster every day. So let's hold on tight, take a deep breath, and ride it out together.
Here are 7 ways to help you get rid of anxiety.
Abdulrahman Al Baalharith May 10, 2020 UNST 194 Journal.docxSALU18
Abdulrahman Al Baalharith
May 10, 2020
UNST 194
Journal #3
As I am a junior student in college, there are many things that worries me while I
am studying. Today, I am going to share a situation related to what I am worried about
the most as a college student. Eventually, what worries me most in my life as a college
student is the grade level of my classes, and making a relationship with friends. So, the
two problems that I am going to talk about are the grades and the relationship. As well
as the self-limiting believes of the problems that trying to convince me.
For example, I am a hardworking student in my studies and I always try to get
the heights grades and excel all other students. However, sometimes I get confused
and stressed out if I have an exam or even homework. I just keep telling myself that I
won’t be able to do it, pass it, and even to pass the course and get a high mark. But,
after the exam and have a feedback of my homework, I reassured myself that I studied
and performed well. Furthermore, making a relationship with other friends makes me
feel uncomfortable. My friends keep telling me that it is good for everyone to have
many friends and be social. But what happened to me in the past made me careful of
not to trust everyone who wants to be a friend with me. Couple years ago, my best
friend was sick and I was with my friend all the time in the hospital. After several days,
my friend got out of the hospital and I noticed that she is not the person that I know. I
have heard from several friends complaining about my friend and I went to ask my
friend about it if it’s true or not. My friend agreed with what they said and after that
didn’t want me to be a friend with him/her. One more thing, the experience that I
recognize from this story is that if I get rid of this stress that makes my life negative, my
studies will be much more better. Also, not to trust everyone.
The greatest risk to me as a college student if I were to fully adopt those self-
limited beliefs is that when I put those believes in my head, I won’t be able to achieve
my goals and success. Furthermore, when I reflect on the problem-saturated story that
I have shared, there are many non-cognitive skills that I have learned about that would
need to focus on developing most to address the problem. The first non-cognitive skill
is that if I keep in mind that I will be able to get a high mark in all my classes, stress
and nothing else will prevent me from doing it. The second non-cognitive skill is that if I
also keep in my mind that not all people are the same and I can make a better
relationship with friends, then everything will be better than I thought. Lastly, there are
a statement about why it will be helpful for me to commit to developing these
problems. One of these statement is that it is very important for everyone to develop
their fears in order to be success in their life.
|04|managing FEELIN.
Lung Cancer: Artificial Intelligence, Synergetics, Complex System Analysis, S...Oleg Kshivets
RESULTS: Overall life span (LS) was 2252.1±1742.5 days and cumulative 5-year survival (5YS) reached 73.2%, 10 years – 64.8%, 20 years – 42.5%. 513 LCP lived more than 5 years (LS=3124.6±1525.6 days), 148 LCP – more than 10 years (LS=5054.4±1504.1 days).199 LCP died because of LC (LS=562.7±374.5 days). 5YS of LCP after bi/lobectomies was significantly superior in comparison with LCP after pneumonectomies (78.1% vs.63.7%, P=0.00001 by log-rank test). AT significantly improved 5YS (66.3% vs. 34.8%) (P=0.00000 by log-rank test) only for LCP with N1-2. Cox modeling displayed that 5YS of LCP significantly depended on: phase transition (PT) early-invasive LC in terms of synergetics, PT N0—N12, cell ratio factors (ratio between cancer cells- CC and blood cells subpopulations), G1-3, histology, glucose, AT, blood cell circuit, prothrombin index, heparin tolerance, recalcification time (P=0.000-0.038). Neural networks, genetic algorithm selection and bootstrap simulation revealed relationships between 5YS and PT early-invasive LC (rank=1), PT N0—N12 (rank=2), thrombocytes/CC (3), erythrocytes/CC (4), eosinophils/CC (5), healthy cells/CC (6), lymphocytes/CC (7), segmented neutrophils/CC (8), stick neutrophils/CC (9), monocytes/CC (10); leucocytes/CC (11). Correct prediction of 5YS was 100% by neural networks computing (area under ROC curve=1.0; error=0.0).
CONCLUSIONS: 5YS of LCP after radical procedures significantly depended on: 1) PT early-invasive cancer; 2) PT N0--N12; 3) cell ratio factors; 4) blood cell circuit; 5) biochemical factors; 6) hemostasis system; 7) AT; 8) LC characteristics; 9) LC cell dynamics; 10) surgery type: lobectomy/pneumonectomy; 11) anthropometric data. Optimal diagnosis and treatment strategies for LC are: 1) screening and early detection of LC; 2) availability of experienced thoracic surgeons because of complexity of radical procedures; 3) aggressive en block surgery and adequate lymph node dissection for completeness; 4) precise prediction; 5) adjuvant chemoimmunoradiotherapy for LCP with unfavorable prognosis.
Acute scrotum is a general term referring to an emergency condition affecting the contents or the wall of the scrotum.
There are a number of conditions that present acutely, predominantly with pain and/or swelling
A careful and detailed history and examination, and in some cases, investigations allow differentiation between these diagnoses. A prompt diagnosis is essential as the patient may require urgent surgical intervention
Testicular torsion refers to twisting of the spermatic cord, causing ischaemia of the testicle.
Testicular torsion results from inadequate fixation of the testis to the tunica vaginalis producing ischemia from reduced arterial inflow and venous outflow obstruction.
The prevalence of testicular torsion in adult patients hospitalized with acute scrotal pain is approximately 25 to 50 percent
Tom Selleck Health: A Comprehensive Look at the Iconic Actor’s Wellness Journeygreendigital
Tom Selleck, an enduring figure in Hollywood. has captivated audiences for decades with his rugged charm, iconic moustache. and memorable roles in television and film. From his breakout role as Thomas Magnum in Magnum P.I. to his current portrayal of Frank Reagan in Blue Bloods. Selleck's career has spanned over 50 years. But beyond his professional achievements. fans have often been curious about Tom Selleck Health. especially as he has aged in the public eye.
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Introduction
Many have been interested in Tom Selleck health. not only because of his enduring presence on screen but also because of the challenges. and lifestyle choices he has faced and made over the years. This article delves into the various aspects of Tom Selleck health. exploring his fitness regimen, diet, mental health. and the challenges he has encountered as he ages. We'll look at how he maintains his well-being. the health issues he has faced, and his approach to ageing .
Early Life and Career
Childhood and Athletic Beginnings
Tom Selleck was born on January 29, 1945, in Detroit, Michigan, and grew up in Sherman Oaks, California. From an early age, he was involved in sports, particularly basketball. which played a significant role in his physical development. His athletic pursuits continued into college. where he attended the University of Southern California (USC) on a basketball scholarship. This early involvement in sports laid a strong foundation for his physical health and disciplined lifestyle.
Transition to Acting
Selleck's transition from an athlete to an actor came with its physical demands. His first significant role in "Magnum P.I." required him to perform various stunts and maintain a fit appearance. This role, which he played from 1980 to 1988. necessitated a rigorous fitness routine to meet the show's demands. setting the stage for his long-term commitment to health and wellness.
Fitness Regimen
Workout Routine
Tom Selleck health and fitness regimen has evolved. adapting to his changing roles and age. During his "Magnum, P.I." days. Selleck's workouts were intense and focused on building and maintaining muscle mass. His routine included weightlifting, cardiovascular exercises. and specific training for the stunts he performed on the show.
Selleck adjusted his fitness routine as he aged to suit his body's needs. Today, his workouts focus on maintaining flexibility, strength, and cardiovascular health. He incorporates low-impact exercises such as swimming, walking, and light weightlifting. This balanced approach helps him stay fit without putting undue strain on his joints and muscles.
Importance of Flexibility and Mobility
In recent years, Selleck has emphasized the importance of flexibility and mobility in his fitness regimen. Understanding the natural decline in muscle mass and joint flexibility with age. he includes stretching and yoga in his routine. These practices help prevent injuries, improve posture, and maintain mobilit
Report Back from SGO 2024: What’s the Latest in Cervical Cancer?bkling
Are you curious about what’s new in cervical cancer research or unsure what the findings mean? Join Dr. Emily Ko, a gynecologic oncologist at Penn Medicine, to learn about the latest updates from the Society of Gynecologic Oncology (SGO) 2024 Annual Meeting on Women’s Cancer. Dr. Ko will discuss what the research presented at the conference means for you and answer your questions about the new developments.
Flu Vaccine Alert in Bangalore Karnatakaaddon Scans
As flu season approaches, health officials in Bangalore, Karnataka, are urging residents to get their flu vaccinations. The seasonal flu, while common, can lead to severe health complications, particularly for vulnerable populations such as young children, the elderly, and those with underlying health conditions.
Dr. Vidisha Kumari, a leading epidemiologist in Bangalore, emphasizes the importance of getting vaccinated. "The flu vaccine is our best defense against the influenza virus. It not only protects individuals but also helps prevent the spread of the virus in our communities," he says.
This year, the flu season is expected to coincide with a potential increase in other respiratory illnesses. The Karnataka Health Department has launched an awareness campaign highlighting the significance of flu vaccinations. They have set up multiple vaccination centers across Bangalore, making it convenient for residents to receive their shots.
To encourage widespread vaccination, the government is also collaborating with local schools, workplaces, and community centers to facilitate vaccination drives. Special attention is being given to ensuring that the vaccine is accessible to all, including marginalized communities who may have limited access to healthcare.
Residents are reminded that the flu vaccine is safe and effective. Common side effects are mild and may include soreness at the injection site, mild fever, or muscle aches. These side effects are generally short-lived and far less severe than the flu itself.
Healthcare providers are also stressing the importance of continuing COVID-19 precautions. Wearing masks, practicing good hand hygiene, and maintaining social distancing are still crucial, especially in crowded places.
Protect yourself and your loved ones by getting vaccinated. Together, we can help keep Bangalore healthy and safe this flu season. For more information on vaccination centers and schedules, residents can visit the Karnataka Health Department’s official website or follow their social media pages.
Stay informed, stay safe, and get your flu shot today!
New Directions in Targeted Therapeutic Approaches for Older Adults With Mantl...i3 Health
i3 Health is pleased to make the speaker slides from this activity available for use as a non-accredited self-study or teaching resource.
This slide deck presented by Dr. Kami Maddocks, Professor-Clinical in the Division of Hematology and
Associate Division Director for Ambulatory Operations
The Ohio State University Comprehensive Cancer Center, will provide insight into new directions in targeted therapeutic approaches for older adults with mantle cell lymphoma.
STATEMENT OF NEED
Mantle cell lymphoma (MCL) is a rare, aggressive B-cell non-Hodgkin lymphoma (NHL) accounting for 5% to 7% of all lymphomas. Its prognosis ranges from indolent disease that does not require treatment for years to very aggressive disease, which is associated with poor survival (Silkenstedt et al, 2021). Typically, MCL is diagnosed at advanced stage and in older patients who cannot tolerate intensive therapy (NCCN, 2022). Although recent advances have slightly increased remission rates, recurrence and relapse remain very common, leading to a median overall survival between 3 and 6 years (LLS, 2021). Though there are several effective options, progress is still needed towards establishing an accepted frontline approach for MCL (Castellino et al, 2022). Treatment selection and management of MCL are complicated by the heterogeneity of prognosis, advanced age and comorbidities of patients, and lack of an established standard approach for treatment, making it vital that clinicians be familiar with the latest research and advances in this area. In this activity chaired by Michael Wang, MD, Professor in the Department of Lymphoma & Myeloma at MD Anderson Cancer Center, expert faculty will discuss prognostic factors informing treatment, the promising results of recent trials in new therapeutic approaches, and the implications of treatment resistance in therapeutic selection for MCL.
Target Audience
Hematology/oncology fellows, attending faculty, and other health care professionals involved in the treatment of patients with mantle cell lymphoma (MCL).
Learning Objectives
1.) Identify clinical and biological prognostic factors that can guide treatment decision making for older adults with MCL
2.) Evaluate emerging data on targeted therapeutic approaches for treatment-naive and relapsed/refractory MCL and their applicability to older adults
3.) Assess mechanisms of resistance to targeted therapies for MCL and their implications for treatment selection
Couples presenting to the infertility clinic- Do they really have infertility...Sujoy Dasgupta
Dr Sujoy Dasgupta presented the study on "Couples presenting to the infertility clinic- Do they really have infertility? – The unexplored stories of non-consummation" in the 13th Congress of the Asia Pacific Initiative on Reproduction (ASPIRE 2024) at Manila on 24 May, 2024.
NVBDCP.pptx Nation vector borne disease control programSapna Thakur
NVBDCP was launched in 2003-2004 . Vector-Borne Disease: Disease that results from an infection transmitted to humans and other animals by blood-feeding arthropods, such as mosquitoes, ticks, and fleas. Examples of vector-borne diseases include Dengue fever, West Nile Virus, Lyme disease, and malaria.
These simplified slides by Dr. Sidra Arshad present an overview of the non-respiratory functions of the respiratory tract.
Learning objectives:
1. Enlist the non-respiratory functions of the respiratory tract
2. Briefly explain how these functions are carried out
3. Discuss the significance of dead space
4. Differentiate between minute ventilation and alveolar ventilation
5. Describe the cough and sneeze reflexes
Study Resources:
1. Chapter 39, Guyton and Hall Textbook of Medical Physiology, 14th edition
2. Chapter 34, Ganong’s Review of Medical Physiology, 26th edition
3. Chapter 17, Human Physiology by Lauralee Sherwood, 9th edition
4. Non-respiratory functions of the lungs https://academic.oup.com/bjaed/article/13/3/98/278874
The prostate is an exocrine gland of the male mammalian reproductive system
It is a walnut-sized gland that forms part of the male reproductive system and is located in front of the rectum and just below the urinary bladder
Function is to store and secrete a clear, slightly alkaline fluid that constitutes 10-30% of the volume of the seminal fluid that along with the spermatozoa, constitutes semen
A healthy human prostate measures (4cm-vertical, by 3cm-horizontal, 2cm ant-post ).
It surrounds the urethra just below the urinary bladder. It has anterior, median, posterior and two lateral lobes
It’s work is regulated by androgens which are responsible for male sex characteristics
Generalised disease of the prostate due to hormonal derangement which leads to non malignant enlargement of the gland (increase in the number of epithelial cells and stromal tissue)to cause compression of the urethra leading to symptoms (LUTS
1. Friday, 27 January 2017 16:21
Shoulda Set Some Boundaries
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By Caileigh Smith, MC, LAC
We often try to motivate ourselves through should statements:
“I should have done better.”
“I shouldn’t have said that.”
“I should only have one cookie.”
But really, the only thing that is guaranteed from should-ing on ourselves is the emotional consequence of guilt.
This is also the case, in my experience at least, when other people should me. I’m not talking about constructive feedback or when we
are learning a new skill, but the type of should-ing that occurs from people struggling with their own codependence.
Individuals who should us, are likely coming from their adapted ego state of needing to be in control. To test this, think of a time you
told someone what they should have done instead of what they actually did; did you think you knew better? Did you want to control
the situation because you knew how it should be handled? Did you believe a certain situation could have been avoided had someone
just listened to your advice?
In my experience, there are days that I struggle to remain in my functional adult state and cross over to a state of being too
vulnerable. This often occurs with particular individuals (parents, eh?) with whom I still grapple with damaged or fractured
boundaries. On these days, or with these people, when I am should-ed upon, I have a shame attack and feelings of guilt that are
difficult for me to shake off.
Protecting Yourself from Carried Guilt
Having experienced this very thing today, I would like to share some ways to overcome these feelings of guilt and shame and move
back to our functional adult self.
Visualize your Boundaries
Remind yourself where you begin and end, and where they do. Sometimes it is helpful to reinforce this boundary through
visualization. Some people picture a hula-hoop around them and gauge that space around them as theirs and protected. I tend to
visualize building a small pony wall, and each brick has a needed word/affirmation on it. (e.g. trust, love, safe. ).
Reframe Your Thoughts
We feel guilt because we believe have erred in some way. Our own guilt lets us know that we have done something outside of our
value system. Carried guilt, on the other hand, is induced into us from childhood trauma and strikes us even when something is not
outside of our values. We may even blame ourselves for things that are not within our control. If you make the determination that you
are feeling carried guilt instead of your own guilt, recognize that this particular should-ing experience is resulting in a cognitive
distortion and work to reframe your thinking. For example:
HOME > BLOG > BLOG ARTICLES
> SHOULDA SET SOME
BOUNDARIES
2. “I am human and fallible.”
“This is not about me but it is about them and their cognitive distortions/codependence.
Talk About Your Boundaries
Having reframed your thoughts in order to work through the feelings of guilt, communicate with the individual in order to be heard
and not to manipulate a particular response or reaction. This can be done through using Pia Mellody’s talking boundary:
“When I heard you say…
What I make up about that/What I think about that is…
And about that, I feel…”
Or even a simple I-statement:
“I feel..… when… because...”
Hopefully, through these three steps, you can move away from the feelings of guilt and the damaging effects of should-ing and back
into your functional adult self. It worked for me today!
Published in Blog Articles
Tagged under trauma childhood trauma emotional trauma
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