This document discusses developing as a change leader by moving from a pleasing approach to being a collaborator. It provides a general framework that involves shifting from pleasing others to focusing on win-win relationships. It discusses the challenges of being a pleaser and compares it to being a collaborator using the lens of positive intelligence and its five sage powers. It also covers developing more creative competencies like relating and provides leadership containers to support the psychological safety needed for the shift from pleasing to collaborating.

1. Developing Pleaser as
Change Leader
Inside-out approach
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Wan Siew Onn
Transformative Coach

2. Agenda
● Main challenge of pleaser
● General framework for upgrade
● Pleaser vs collaborator
● Creative competencies
● Leadership container

3. Main challenge of
pleaser
● Indirectly tries to gain acceptance and affection by helping, pleasing,
rescuing, or flattering others.
● Loses sight of own needs
and becomes resentful
as a result.
Saboteur test
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4. General framework
for upgrade
● Pleasing others only -->
Work on win-win relationship
● From inside to
outside
win
win

5. Pleaser vs collaborator (1)
Positive Intelligence
: 5 Sage Powers

6. Pleaser vs collaborator (2)
Positive Intelligence : 5 Sage Powers
Navigate is about choosing between various paths and
alternatives based on a consistent internal compass.
Exploring is like a child
walking along a shoreline and
turning over rocks to see
what’s underneath.
Empathizing is about
feeling and showing
appreciation, compassion,
and forgiveness. Empathy
has two targets: yourself and
others.
True innovation is about
breaking out of the boxes, the
assumptions, and the habits
that hold us back.
Activate power moves you
into pure action, where all
your mental and emotional
energies are laser-focused on
action and not distracted by
the Saboteurs.

7. Creative competencies(1)
Leadership Circle Profile

8. Creative competencies(2)
From pleasing to more
creative competencies

9. Creative competencies(3)
From pleasing to more
creative competencies
● Relating

10. Leadership container
● The shift from pleasing to collaborating requires a container to provide psychological safety
and support.
● Be co-organizer : AskOne Leadership Development series
Photo credit : Hamman, Michael. Evolvagility: Growing an Agile Leadership Culture from the Inside Out (p. 90)

11. Workshops
● Positive Intelligence (PQ) 2021 program for mental fitness
● Workshop for Leadership Circle Profile self-assessment for change leaders
● AskOne Leadership Development series