This document provides an overview of managing conflict in the workplace. It begins with definitions of key terms and explores the nature, reasons, and styles of dealing with conflict. It recommends adopting a collaborative style to find root causes, allow all parties to speak, and reach consensus. Strategies discussed include using an interest-based relational approach, knowing hot buttons, minimizing violence, listening, encouraging conversation, and effective communication and negotiation. The document also addresses generational differences, emotional intelligence, the role of leaders, mediation, and resolving conflict respectfully.

1. Managing conflict at work
by Toronto Training and HR
October 2013

2. CONTENTS
5-6
7-8
9-10
11-13
14-15
16-17
18-19
20-22
23-25
26-27
28-29
30-31
32-33
34-35
36-39
40-41
42-43
44-45
46-48
49-50
Definitions
The nature of conflict
Reasons for conflict
Styles of dealing with conflict
Adopting a collaborative style
Using the “Interest-based relational” approach
Conflict strategies
Strategies to minimize the possibility of violence
Benefits of listening and understanding
Encouraging a conversation to take place
Golden rules of engagement
Communication
Negotiation
Tackling sensitive areas
Generational differences
Raising levels of emotional intelligence
What should leaders look for?
Mediation
Resolving conflict
Conclusion and questions
Page 2

3. Introduction
Page 3

4. Introduction to Toronto Training
and HR
Toronto Training and HR is a specialist training and
human resources consultancy headed by Timothy Holden
10 years in banking
10 years in training and human resources
Freelance practitioner since 2006
The core services provided by Toronto Training and HR
are:
Training event design
Training event delivery
Reducing costs, saving time plus improving
employee engagement and morale
Services for job seekers
Page 4

5. Definitions
Page 5

6. Definitions
•
•
•
•
Conflict
Conflict resolution
Constructive conflict
Destructive conflict
•
•
•
•
Why does it exist?
Myths around conflict
Factors influencing conflict
When we are likely to
respond poorly to conflict
Page 6

7. The nature of conflict
Page 7

8. The nature of conflict
•
•
•
•
•
•
Types
Categories
Sources
Origins
Ingredients
Components
Page 8

9. Reasons for conflict
Page 9

10. Reasons for conflict
•
•
•
•
Contentious personalities
Misunderstanding
Issues
Leadership styles
Page 10

11. Styles of dealing with
conflict
Page 11

12. Styles of dealing with conflict 1 of 2
•
•
•
•
•
Competitive or assertive
Collaborative
Compromising
Accommodating
Avoiding
Page 12

13. Styles of dealing with conflict 2 of 2
• What it looks or feels like
• The potential result
• When to use it
Page 13

14. Adopting a collaborative
style
Page 14

15. Adopting a collaborative style
•
•
•
•
Find the root cause
Allow all parties to speak
Encourage all parties to listen
Identify areas of
disagreement
• Identify areas of agreement
• Search for solutions
• Reach a consensus
Page 6

16. Using the “Interest-based
relational” approach
Page 16

17. Using the “Interest-based
relational” approach
• Make sure that good
relationships are the first
priority
• Keep people and problems
separate
• Pay attention to the interests
that are being presented
• Listen first and talk second
• Set out the “facts”
• Explore options together
Page 17

18. Conflict strategies
Page 18

19. Conflict strategies
• Know your hot buttons
• Avoid being insensitive
• Appreciate/Inquire/Respond
Page 19

20. Strategies to minimize the
possibility of violence
Page 20

21. Strategies to minimize the
possibility of violence 1 of 2
• Fostering organizational
cultures that do not tolerate
violent behaviours and that
value and act on reports of
such behaviour
• Completing appropriate
screening of job applicants
Page 21

22. Strategies to minimize the
possibility of violence 2 of 2
• Training employees on the
warning signs of violent
behaviour and what to do if
those signs are observed
• Resolving serious workplace
conflicts before they can
escalate into violent incidents
Page 22

23. Benefits of listening and
understanding
Page 23

24. Benefits of listening and
understanding 1 of 2
• A different or new
understanding of the problem
• New ways to improve the
workplace environment
• Steps to be taken to stop the
annoying behaviour
• People having a discussion of
how to repair the damage
• Opportunity to change a
perceived unfair rule or
regulation
Page 24

25. Benefits of listening and
understanding 2 of 2
• Finding ways to accommodate
a personal need
• Letting the person be heard
Page 25

26. Encouraging a
conversation to take place
Page 26

27. Encouraging a conversation to take
place
• Realize everyone’s good
intentions
• Resist the urge to solve the
problem
• Encourage in-person
conversations
• If you have to, take a side
• Evangelize your philosophy
about conflict
Page 27

28. Golden rules of
engagement
Page 28

29. Golden rules of engagement
• Listen and respond with
empathy
• Be involved; ask for the other
person’s opinions, ideas and
thoughts
• Maintain and affirm selfesteem
Page 29

30. Communication
Page 30

31. Communication
• The role of communication
• Non-defensive
communication
• Six stages of a conversation
• Rational communicators
• Relational communicators
• Avoiders
• Fighters
• Emotional roller coasters
Page 31

32. Negotiation
Page 32

33. Negotiation
• The negotiation process
• Steps to take when
negotiating
Page 33

34. Tackling sensitive areas
Page 34

35. Tackling sensitive areas
• Confident with the facts
• Tentative with the
interpretation
• Encourage the “adversary” to
poke holes in the
interpretation
Page 35

36. Generational differences
Page 36

37. Generational differences 1 of 3
•
•
•
•
•
Veterans
Baby Boomers
Generation X
Generation Y
Millennials
Page 37

38. Generational differences 2 of 3
ADDRESSING GENERATIONAL
CONFLICT
• Policies that limit texting during
work hours and the use of nonwork technology
• Install software to limit access to
specific social media sites
• Provide clear communications and
expectations at the beginning
• Utilize job shadowing to appreciate
the efforts of others
Page 38

39. Generational differences 3 of 3
ADDRESSING GENERATIONAL
CONFLICT (CONTINUED)
• “Hire around” the Millennials
• Work with local colleges to teach
Millennials how to act at work
• Bring in speakers on the topic of
generational differences
• Provide awareness training
• Offer a flexible work schedule
• Ensure one day per month casual
attire can be worn
Page 39

40. Raising levels of emotional
intelligence
Page 40

41. Raising levels of emotional
intelligence
•
•
•
•
•
Self-awareness
Self-regulation
Self-motivation
Empathy
Effective relationships
Page 41

42. What should leaders look
for?
Page 42

43. What should leaders look for?
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Alternatives
Emphasis
Disagreement
Agreement
Openness
Participation
Interaction
Page 43

44. Mediation
Page 44

45. Mediation
• Definition
• Steps in the mediation
process
• Traits of a good mediator
• A mediated agreement
• Tips for using mediation
• Dos and don’ts
Page 45

46. Resolving conflict
Page 46

47. Resolving conflict 1 of 2
• Discuss the situation in a
respectful manner
• Be specific
• Discuss how a conflict affects
you, the work group or the
project
• Ask for the specific cause of
the conflict
• Ask for the solution
• Agree on the action to be
taken
Page 47

48. Resolving conflict 2 of 2
•
•
•
•
•
Set the scene
Gather information
Agree the problem
Brainstorm possible solutions
Negotiate a solution
• Guiding principles
Page 48

49. Conclusion and questions
Page 49

50. Conclusion and questions
Summary
Videos
Questions
Page 50