This document discusses various topics related to communicating sexually including influences on attitudes toward sex such as culture, media, parents and peers. It also discusses orientations toward sex, changing attitudes over time, and debates around safe sex vs abstinence education. Specific research on relationship outcomes for different levels of premarital sexual experience is presented. Guidance around discussing sex with children at different ages and responses to sexual harassment are also covered.

1. Communicating SexuallyThe Closest Physical Encounter

2. What influences our Attitudes Toward Sex?CultureThe Mass MediaTV (16 and Pregnant, Bachelor)Music (Lady Gaga & Keshavs. Marvin Gaye & Al Green)Print (Playboy vs. Cosmo)ParentsPeersPast RelationshipsWho has the most Influence?

3. Three General Orientations toward SexProcreational: sex is for making babies Recreational: sex is for funRelational: sex is an expression of intimacyWhat orientation is most accepted in the US?

4. Changing Attitudes about SexHow have attitudes toward sex changed over the years?Why do you think this is?Is this good or bad?

5. Sorensen’s researchSerial monogamists who had sex prior to marriage vs. Virgins waiting for marriage & sexually promiscuous.Monogomists  healthier attitudes toward sex, higher grades, generally better adjusted.Why do you think this is?The study was done in 1973, how might things have changed since then?

6. Safe Sex vs. Abstinence? Why do you think this debate is still prevalent in our society?Two sides, two different assumptionsSexuality is something learned.“We don’t want our kids to have unsafe sex or engage in sex without understanding the consequences.”Sexuality is connected to morality.“By teaching safe sex, we are essentially telling our kids it is ok to do it as long as its safe.”

7. The talk!

8. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bL33hoaGM6o

10. The TalkWhen is the best time?Are there consequences for starting the talks too young?What should be said?Kids 3-8?Body parts, Privacy8-12?Biological stuff12 and up?Emotional and Relational Consequences

11. Sexual Invitations and CoercionWhy do men typically initiate sex in early relationships?What is date rape?The rape paradox~If you come out  Victimized If you stay quiet  SilencedBoth cases, Power is removed…What do you think are some of the causes of date rape?

12. Sexual HarassmentWhat is sexual harassment?

13. Sexual HarassmentOne out of every two working women is sexually harassed at some time. Women sometimes see behavior as more sexually harassing than men do.Various verbal and nonverbal behaviors can be interpreted as harassing, including:comments about a person’s body, dating relationships, or sexual activitytouch, especially to vulnerable or intimate body parts

14. Responses to Sexual HarassmentPassive: indirect strategies, such as ignoring the harassment or appeasing the harasser Assertive: directly telling the harasser to stop the behavior; issuing warnings or threats Retalitory: punishing or getting revenge on the harasser

15. Based on what you learned in this chapter, what strategies would you use to protect yourself from sexual coercion or harassment? Why do you think people misinterpret supposed sexual cues so often?