1. SIBLING CONNECTION
 “People may think that you are a big
brat, but to me you are just a big
bother, you can be overprotective but
hey I still love you. Thank you for
lighting up my life and always being
there for me. Sometimes you say for
me not to love you, but I always will
no matter what. U fill my heart with
love and joy”
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

2. SIBLING DEFINITION;
the obvious
 Brother or a sister; wordreference.com
 One of two or more individuals having one common
parent; Merriam Webster
 …usually taken to mean that the two people are
genetically very close, though it is not always
necessarily the case, i.e. an adoption. In most
societies throughout the world siblings will usually
grow up in the same household. This closeness is
marked with the development of strong emotional
associations between them; Wikipedia
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

3. SIBLING DEFINITION;
the law
 "Biological Sibling” means “A sibling, by
birth; of an adopted person.” “A
brother, sister, or half-sibling of a child
who is being placed in foster care or
being placed for adoption.”
 “Sibling Group” means “biological
siblings who have been raised together
or have lived together.”
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

4. SIBLING DEFINITION;
the memory
SHARE YOUR MEMORY……
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

5. SIBLING DEFINITION;
the emotion
SHARE YOUR EMOTION……
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

6. REALITY CHECK
1. Almost 600,000 youth in foster care
2. 75% are separated from at least one
sibling
3. + those separated by other out-of-
home care
4. = countless youth void of the people
who shape their lives
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

7. WHY ARE SIBLINGS
SEPARATED?
 Parentified Child
 Special Needs
 Sibling Rivalry
 Number of siblings in the family
 Different fathers
 Come into the system at different times
 Abuse
 Adoption Potential
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

8. PARENTIFIED CHILD;
REASONABLE?
 Separate to give him/her a
chance to be a child
 Younger siblings placed in
unfamiliar home without parents –
and – older siblings
 Older sibling feels responsible –
loses identity – role
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

9. SPECIAL NEEDS (needs to
receive more focused attention)
; REASONABLE?
 With siblings, they will receive more
thoughtful, maybe knowledgable, attention
 Placement alone distorts sense of place in
family
 Placement with other youth with special
needs may = less attention
 Siblings provide support and appropriate
behavior
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

10. SIBLING RIVALRY (Separate to
cease or prevent sibling rivalry)
; REASONABLE?
 Sibling rivalry is a part of sibling
connection – a fact of life
 Unconditional love
 Learn to handle conflict
 Learn to resolve differences
 Understanding and acceptance
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

11. NUMBER OF CHILDREN IN
FAMILY; REASONABLE?
 There are too many children to place
together – can’t find a home
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

12. DIFFERENT FATHERS;
REASON
 Biology
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

13. COME INTO SYSTEM AT
DIFFERENT TIMES; REASON
 Birth order
 New challenges
 Subsequent move
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

14. ABUSE;
REASON
 Physical, sexual, emotional
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

15. ABUSE Physical, sexual, emotional
REASONABLE?
 May inflict abuse on another victim
 Evaluate sibling rivalry versus sibling
hostilities
 Evaluate resources
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

16. ADOPTION POTENTIAL;
REASON
 It is more likely that younger children
will be adopted; older children will
experience long-term foster care
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

17. ADOPTION POTENTIAL;
REASONABLE?
 Teen and adult adoptions are on the
rise
 Siblings ‘will’ reunite; some older
intervening to become guardians for
younger siblings
 ¼ vs. ¾ - memories for the future
 Deserving of family - together
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

18. 2006, “The Science of Siblings”
Time - July issue.
 From the time they are born, our brothers and
sisters are our collaborators and co-conspirators,
our role models and cautionary tales. They are our
scolds, protectors, goads, tormentors, playmates,
counselors, sources of envy, objects of pride. They
teach us how to resolve conflicts and how not to;
how to conduct friendships and when to walk away
from them. Sisters teach brothers about the
mysteries of girls; brothers teach sisters about the
puzzle of boys. Our spouses arrive comparatively
late in our lives; our parents eventually leave us.
Our siblings may be the only people we'll ever know
who truly qualify as partners for life (Jeffrey Kluger.)
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

19. SIBLING LIFE SPAN
 Five Groups
 1. Early childhood
 2. Early/elementary
 3. Adolescence
 4. Adulthood
 5. Old Age
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

20. SIBLING LIFE SPAN
 Early childhood
 Constant
companions and
playmates -
influence social and
cognitive learning –
skills of helping,
sharing and
cooperating
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

21. SIBLING LIFE SPAN
 Early/elementary
 Interaction with
siblings extend
beyond home to
influence
interactions with
peers
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

22. SIBLING LIFE SPAN
 Adolesence; ebb
and flow of
independence and
individuality;
relationship taken
for granted; space
yet comfort in
knowing they exist
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

23. SIBLING LIFE SPAN
 Adulthood
 While ‘own
families’ may take
priority -
guidance, support
and sharing
comes from
siblings
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

24. SIBLING LIFE SPAN
 Old Age
 Siblings become
companions
again, sometimes
even living
together when
their own kids
move on
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

25. SIBLING BILL OF RIGHTS
 Requires that the child welfare agency prepare a
description of efforts made to keep siblings
together and/or provide reasons siblings are not
placed together
 Provisions for post-permanency visits with
siblings
 Requires the child welfare agency and/or court to
consider siblings in placement and/or permanency
planning
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

26. SIBLING BILL OF RIGHTS
 Provides for an exemption from limits on the size
of a foster home to accommodate placement of a
sibling group
 Statement of legislative intent to support sibling
relationships
 Right to, and provision for, maintaining contact
 Sibling relationship considered in determining
"best interest"
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

27. NATIONAL SIBLING
CONNECTION DAY, March 1, 2006
 Whereas sibling relationships are among the longest lasting and
most significant relationships in life;
 Whereas brothers and sisters share history, memories, and
traditions that bind them together as family;
 Whereas it is estimated that over 65 percent of children in foster
care have siblings, and are often separated when they are
placed in the foster care system, adopted, or confronted with
different kinship placements;
 Whereas children in foster care have a greater risk of emotional
disturbance, difficulties in school, and problems with
relationships than their peers;
 Whereas the separation of siblings as children causes
additional grief and loss;
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

28. NATIONAL SIBLING
CONNECTION DAY
 Resolved, That the Senate-- (1) designates
March 1, 2006, as `Siblings Connection Day';
 (2) encourages the people of the United
States to celebrate sibling relationships on
this day; and
 (3) supports efforts to respect and preserve
those sibling relationships that are at risk of
being disrupted due to the placement of
children into the foster care system.
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

29. STATES; LISTEN TO YOUTH
 WHEREAS, The policy of the State of Illinois mandates that
contact be maintained between siblings pre-termination while
they are in foster care or youth in care and provides for
possible contact post majority via the Illinois Adoption Registry
and Medical Information Exchange
 13 states provide specific acceptable reasons for
separating siblings
 32 states address sibling visitation in policies
 14 states have consent decrees mandating sibling
visitation after adoption
 5 states allow judges to order sibling visitation over
the adoptive parent’s suggestions
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

30. TWO DAYS = CONNECTION?
Most frequent visitation = Weekly Visits
One hour a week
52 weeks a year
52 hours
JUST OVER TWO DAYS A YEAR
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

31. MAINE
Act to Support Sibling Rights in Child
Welfare Custody Matters: Kala Clark
2007; siblings’ right to regularly scheduled
visits whenever reasonable and practical
and in the best interests of the children!
“I love you 4ever and always. I wish that I could do a lot of
stuff with you. Remember the good dayz? I wish that it
could be like that. I love you with all my heart. I wish
that we could be best friends. I will be glad if I could
see you more. Love always and forever,” Jess
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

32. YOUNG - ADULTS
Rights of older siblings to file suit for access
to a younger sibling….custody of younger
“Hey bro- I think of you all the time. When I
see you, you make me laugh. I have lots of fun.
Hey maybe some day when you are 18 you can
move in with me, okay? You are the best, my
best friend, my best brother Number #1,”
From Rebecca
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

33. RESOURCES
AND SPECIAL THANKS
• American Bar Association Center on Children and
the Law; www.abanet.org/child/about
• Camp To Belong; www.camptobelong.org
• Casey Family Programs; www.casey.org
• National Resource Center for Family-Centered
Practice and Permanency Planning;
www.hunter.cuny.edu/socwork/nrcfcpp
• Neighbor to Neighbor; www.hullhouse.org
• Neighbor to Family; www.ntf.org
• Susan Dougherty;
susan@doughertyconsultants.com
• Youth Leadership Advisory Team; www.ylat.org
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

34. LYNN’S SENTIMENT
When I think of the closeness
we share now…
I wish we would have known
each other when we were
kids…
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

35. SIB ACTION PLAN
• S = Personally; SHARE
• Professionally; sense of belonging
• I = Personally; INSPIRE
• Professionally; imagine
• B = Personally; BIRTHDAY
• Professionally; birthday
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

36. GIVE SIBLINGS
THEIR RIGHT TO REUNITE®
 To the outside world we all grow old.
But not to brothers and sisters. We
know each other as we always were. We
know each other's hearts. We share
private family jokes. We remember
family feuds and secrets, family griefs
and joys. We live outside the touch of
time.
 ~Clara Ortega
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006

37. GIVE SIBLINGS
THEIR RIGHT TO REUNITE®
Lynn Price, Ashoka Fellow Karyn Schimmels, M.P.A.
Social Entrepreneur, Speaker Camp To Belong Volunteer
and Author Advisory Board Member and
9445 Sand Hill Place Public Child Welfare state
employee
Highlands Ranch, CO 80126
888-7BELONG 8905 Southwest Avon Court
303-791-0915 Tigard, OR 97224
503-945-6646
Lynn@camptobelong.org
Karyn.Schimmels@state.or.us
www.camptobelong.org
www.lynnprice.com Real Belonging; Give Siblings Their
Right to Reunite, and Sibling
Bracelet available on website
Lynn Price and Karyn Schimmels,
2006