Civility: Heart of Community
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Presentation at ICMA Conference 2014
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Civility: Heart of Community
- 1. Francine Ramaglia Assistant City Manager Delray Beach, Florida : Heart of Community
- 3. 95% Believe incivility a problem Civility in America 2013
- 4. 68% Political incivility deters qualified people from working in public service Civility in America 2013
- 5. 40% Workers leaving jobs as a result of being treated rudely Boston Globe
- 8. First to Say it, Ends it…
- 9. 3,000+
- 10. The internet and social media are central to the human experience, a place you cannot escape if you want to work, date, socialize, run for office, mount an advocacy campaign or open a checking account. New York Times, August 14, 2014
- 11. Social Media as a Weapon 71% Believe internet/social media playground for bullies Civility in America 2013
- 12. Social Media as a Weapon 71% Believe internet/social media playground for bullies Civility in America 2013
- 14. Am Not! Are Too!
- 15. Can’t We All Just Get Along?
- 16. Incivility Happens… Why it Happens… Egotism/sense of entitlement/greed Lack of self esteem/feeling secure Mean spiritedness, anger, fear, mental health issues Isolation/loneliness Lack of restraint—no filter Lack of social, economic equity, fairness What it Makes Happen… Delayed decisions/incorrect decisions/instability Inefficient use of resources/increased workloads Longer hours/greater absenteeism Drives away good staff/good future leaders Deteriorating relationships Disheartened residents Lack of trust
- 17. Living in the Fishbowl… Everyone watching what we do Makes us easy targets Gives us ability to model We can expect others to behave as we do
- 18. ENGAGEMENT TRUST COMMUNITY …focus on FACILITATORS …focus on OUR ROLE …focus on ENABLERS to ask to do it matters
- 19. Collaborations people work together effectively and achieve objectives more efficiently Ideas without fear of being dismissed or ridiculed, people will support new ideas for improving the situation Satisfaction when the public works together with the elected leaders and staff, they enrich the users’ experiences Engagement Builds Civility… Bottom line Success depends on it!
- 20. Altruism turns people on more than money. Naked Conversations bloggers, Robert Schobel & Shel Israel
- 21. What’s Trust Got to Do with It? Millenials have the least social trust—only 19%-- and are also less attached to political institutions Plexus Institute, May 2014 Social 32% Family 69% People 33%
- 22. 50% Millenials optimistic: America’s best years ahead Pew 2014 Future is bright…
- 23. 9% Attend meetings in-person 66% Confident in local community leadership Gallup
- 24. Title
- 25. Thoughts on… Boards & Committees, Focus Groups & Volunteers Generally: • Involve early and often • Actively recruit • Expect more • Set ground rules • Create smaller groups and work together as peers • Clear two way communication Policy, Practices and Procedures: • Methods of appointing/removing/replacing • Orientation materials/continued training • Policy on conduct/oath or pledge • Enforcement of meeting procedures/rules • Facilitation/teambuilding
- 26. The remarkable thing about the internet is that it is the ultimate laboratory for problem solving and engenuity. Weber Shandwick
- 27. Peak Democracy OPEN TOWN HALL Building Public Trust in Government
- 30. Please Don’t Feed the Trolls…
- 31. Give up Getting the Last Word…
- 33. Thoughts on… Social Media/Internet • Policy, internal and external • Pick your platforms wisely • Go high tech & high touch • Model/participate in the conversation--real time/all the time—2 way • Listen with keen interest as well as intelligence • Consistent messaging and consistent treatment • Create and co-create content—collaborate and champion open systems • Embrace and navigate the complexity
- 34. Nothing Succeeds like Success… krieger.jhu.edu/civility/ www.oshkoshcivilityproject.org/ www.doorcountycivilityproject.org/ www.consensuskc.org/civilityproject/ www.uakron.edu/bliss/.../ohio-civility- project.dot www.beverlyhills.org/CivilCity www.choosecivility.org/ www.instituteforcivility.org www.iap2.org/ www.ncdd.org/ www.deliberative-democracy.net/ www.artofhosting.org/home/
- 35. It’s not what you say. It’s how you say it. Three things in human life are important: The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. The third is to be kind. - Henry James www.dsaspeakyourpeace.org/
- 37. Francine Ramaglia Additional Information Assistant City Manager, Delray Beach, FL Ramaglia@mydelraybeach.com 561-243-7144 Thank You!! Questions/Comments?
Editor's Notes
- We love our communities—we love them with a passion. Combine that with a basic element of our human nature, the desire to contribute, and Voila! you find people who make things happen! It’s this--this emotional connection or bond to the places we live-- that is the very thing that makes the difference in all we do: it’s the heart of our community. But sometimes, well, things can get ugly. And of course incivility takes the stage. Last year, I spoke about building a culture of civility in city hall; today I want to extend that to creating community dialogues—in person and through the internet and social media-- among residents, volunteers & partner organizations as well as with staff, council & committee members. Civility is the key for effective open discourse and engagement—built by authenticy, transparency, community. More importantly, today I am going to talk about the place where I live---where I have spent most of my life. And I hope that by doing that we think about the places we work with the same affection as the places we live. So, as you already guessed, we are going to look at civility at the heart of our communities.
- Ok, so there are countless efforts to create a new dialogue about civility in public discourse. And it isn’t limited to any one place---could be anywhere: at meetings, events or even the grocery. Has there ever been a time the world was courteous in all instances or that it can be? Come on, even Victorian England saw debate! In reality, civic discourse is often loud, unruly and even rude—I’m from an Italian family so to be honest, the open and lively exchange is the way it’s supposed to be---a sign of love even. But in today’s instant news‐obsessed culture, it doesn’t work that way-- actions truly speak louder than words. Local government is particularly vulnerable to criticism about public meetings and events because it is far more likely that a citizen will participate, if they participate, at the local level. They may do that in person—at a meeting or event or as a volunteer---or they may do that virtually through social media or the internet. Bottom line, people with something to say should have the opportunity to express themselves--but they also have the responsibility to deliver their message with kindness and respect. Practicing civility is how you get good—and how a community gets great. The charge then is to improve communication, not end disagreements, by reminding ourselves of the basic principles of respect.
- But sadly, studies say incivility is epidemic today--the good news is that it's one we can cure. It’s way beyond Political Correctness—not your run of the mill hyper-sensitivity or Word Police action here. It’s the type of rude and uncivil behavior emphasized runs counter to the good communication and collaborative behavior that contributes to a healthy community or a productive, safe and satisfying workplace for our local government employees. Americans still seem resigned to the ideas that incivility is just a part of the political process and that our nation’s civility problem won’t improve until our government leaders’ act more civilly (80%). Faced with a sort of paradox, American public life seems like it is destined to be plagued by incivility for years to come. That’s why nearly 7 in 10 people avoid working in the public sector and also why close to half of those who do will leave because of it. On a personal level, approximately one-third of Americans report that uncivil expression of political views cost them a friendship both online (37%) and offline (34%), at a significantly higher rate that in 2012.
- In my community, lawsuits and arguments have become a way of life. The divisiveness gave rise to one of the only local PACs funded to the tune of $1 million and before and since the election, the city has spent the majority of its time on ethics complaints, inspector general inquiries and other investigations. Again, the reason is the extreme love of community and the fight for what each group believes is right. Unfortunately, city staff along with a variety of community organizations and landowners have been under attack. A number of staff people have departed and almost all projects have been put on hold over the last two years. Last March, during a Planning & Zoning Advisory Board meeting a board member disagreed with a proposal to delegate limited authority to staff for a portion of the land development review process. Mainly, she “did not understand” why staff would be able to look at project applications independent of a Development Review Committee. As a result, she attempted to publicly shame the P&Z Director. In the video, you can hear staff saying, “Wow. Wow. That might be a bit over the top, I think.” When interviewed, the P&Z Director said he felt that the issue is that “it becomes uncomfortable when you’re dealing with an issue whether it’s a board member or the public and they make it personal. There’s an attachment of you as a person to the discussion. That’s all that bothered me — that it became personal and not about the issue.” Other meeting attendees were not impressed. Nor were those watching from home or members of the community. Oddly enough, the Council was split on the matter of her behavior.
- A couple points I want to make about the video--- This is an appointed board, all volunteers. Volunteers’ stakes are often even higher than paid employees and sometimes elected officials—more emotional when it’s “their cause” or “community identity or connection” at stake. And yet, there is still no excuse for bullying—not from a boss, not from an elected official and not from a volunteer. That was clearly a personal attack and NO ONE was comfortable with it. Looks like very few people at the meeting: would you go if that’s what might happen? But there were people watching on TV and online as you’ll see in a minute.
- Believe it or not, there seems to be more research on the use of Nazi references in arguments than there is for bullying from a board member. Volunteer board members at times intimidate and retaliate on staff as well as use staff provided information to attack other board members. These groups, although with less official capacity, are often similar to councils/commissions and can put a community at risk. In fact, this same appointed board, due to the nature of the area that they cover, has been involved in a series of legal proceedings based on their positions as a result of a complete change in the council composition.
- This incident got not only tremendous local media coverage, it also appeared in over 3,000 online news outlets—local and national, from one end of the country to the other-- and created similar social media activity. And people discussed it live and in person too!
- Social Media and the internet have been great for government on one hand, but a weapon on the other: for instance, it increases transparency and provides 24/7 access but it can also result in misinformation, micro-analysis and disrespectful commentary. Roughly 7 in 10 people see social media and the internet as not only uncivil, but as a platform for bullying
- Believe it or not, the Council was not necessarily in agreement on whether to remove this board member. Fortunately, they did not have to face that decision in that she offered her resignation. Of note, while few people attended the original meeting I showed you earlier, this meeting was well attended.
- When you get right down to it, incivility is about people and reaction to people. So incivility is not debate---of course, nothing says that contentious debate isn’t healthy or can’t be positive, although it most often is not. The trick or the fix is to make the move to “the art of productive argument” The issues can be as complicated as the science of bacterial growth in effluent or as simple as patching a road. But none are as complex as understanding human emotion. People on both sides feel insulted and misunderstood after the repeated controversies. They yearn for respect. But they struggle when asked to suggest solutions. The greatest danger of incivility is that the community “tunes out” and very little can be accomplished
- And that’s where we and our councils/commissions come in. Because we live in a fishbowl, we can model the behavior that we hope to see by setting the tone. Just like bad money drives out good money, the same is true with people willing to take the risk of public involvement. Council Meetings are theater. What story and message do you want to send? When it goes well, it is the best possible show about grassroots democracy and it is the American ideal. When it goes badly, it is a show that no one but horror fans want to watch. When it goes well, it is a hit that others want to join. When it goes badly, it drives away talent. What is the message you want the audience to take away about your council meeting? These people know what they are doing vs. these people are nuts. These people behave in a way that makes me think I can trust them. These people are smart and hardworking. I would be willing to trust my future and my money to these people. These people will work together lead us out of trouble.
- Incivility can be the enemy of a collaborative culture. We know that the key to a positive, productive, engaging culture is listening, understanding and responding to concerns about behavior quickly and ensuring that leadership sets the tone for meaningful, respectful interaction. (Andy Polansky, 2013) So this is what I would call the Civility Formula. We have to acknowledge we all have a part and Model to build engagement and to create trust and to foster community—recognizing that there are many groups and many ways to connect. It is built from those connections, not just the tools, we use to make them. That’s often where we get hung up and also where there are great opportunities for help. Sometimes it takes somebody strong to step forward to change that—to try to renew the stature of the city’s government.
- Council Members want to say that they are serving in order to make a positive difference, and that they want to work for what is best for the community in the long run. Incivility means they are failing. Stability and civility attract positive results. Incivility drives people and projects away. Volunteering is cornerstone to communities. create affinity groups. Support and encourage grassroots efforts. Source: International Association for Public Participation iap2 “Public Participation for Decision Makers”
- If you’ve read Bowling Alone, then you know that civic activities, including even club memberships, have declined immensely as TV and the internet gave people in-home entertainment as well as a means to stay connected without “joining something”. Even young people are “hanging out” less—in fact, the average teen spends 3.5 hours alone each day. So then, how do we turn the masses on? People do indeed care and are looking to get involved---what they need us to do is give them a way and ask them to. And, perception is reality---studies show that when people think that something is good, they will join and do so they can make it better. Likewise, when it doesn’t appear to be going well, people will stay away.
- Incivility and distrust go hand in hand. Trust is the way that people work together for the common good---the way they build bridges between different beliefs and backgrounds; the way to find common ground. So then trust is the key driver for civility. In 1972, half the people trusted the other half. Today, only 1/3 of us trust either society or the people we meet---worse than that, more than 2/3 of us don’t entirely trust our family members. This ranks us 51 out of 55 countries in a recent World Values survey. The news doesn’t seem to get any better as generational divide is evident with clearly declining social trust: 19% millennials 31% gen X 40% boomers 37% pre-1945
- Millenials hold the key to the way a trusting society evolves: although they do not necessarily have the same level of trust in society as their parents and grandparents, they are more optimistic about the future. And so we have to go where they are….
- Ironic, right? Nearly 7/10 think government is uncivil, yet it appears the same group or order of magnitude believes in the ability of local leadership. That gives us something to capitalize on.
- Mindmixer put this 5 question “Who Said It?” quiz on it’s website to see how well we know our communities. It’s not pass or fail, but it is surprising to find that our communities are often just waiting for us to connect with them.
- General Involve people before you’ve made a decision. The earlier you involve us, the less conflict you’ll face. Actively recruit participants. Don’t just post an ad or send a postcard, build networks. Reach out to us. Set ground rules. They help us feel safe. Expect more from the public. Let us help make the hard choices. Let us be citizens, not just customers of government services. Let us work in small groups with other citizens. We want to hear from one another and have a dialogue with people who think differently. As often as possible, don’t separate yourselves from citizens up on a stage, but join us as peers. Policy, Practices and Procedures: Methods of appointing/removing/replacing Orientation materials/continued training Policy on conduct/oath or pledge Enforcement of meeting procedures/rules Facilitation/teambuilding Training should include how to run a meeting, how to frame an issue, how to manage public discourse, what to do in difficult situations
- Need to consider social media and internet monitoring tools such as radian
- Trolling is just a symptom of those bigger problems. Sometimes, Disengagement is the only way to go. Scholars note that one of the primary motivations of trolling is to titillate other trolls. This sets up one of the central difficulties in confronting trolling: Shedding light on trolling may only encourage it. Modeling good behavior to incorrigible Trolls may earn you a place in heaven, but it will make for a life that’s nothing but tedious Respecting yourself and your own interests and limits is important too
- Use the tools, but resist temptation.
- CiviliNation, a global, 501(c)(3) non-profit, takes a strong stand against online hostility, character assassination and adult cyberbullying. Its focus is on getting people to communicate and engage in cyberspace in a responsible and accountable way. They released a book called Civility in the Digital Age: How Companies and People Can Triumph over Haters, Trolls, Bullies and Other Jerks Lays it out, in blunt language and with real life examples, and suggests ways to turn things around using approaches, tools and attitude adjustments to make the Internet an embracing place where people come together to share ideas and work through some of the most difficult issues of today without letting the negative forces to take over.
- Policy, internal and external Pick your platforms wisely Go high tech & high touch Model/participate in the conversation--real time/all the time—2 way Listen with keen interest as well as intelligence Consistent messaging and consistent treatment: People need info from multiple sources, voices and to hear it 3-5 times to believe it: Once: 6% Twice: 16% 3 times: 35% 4-5 times: 25% 6-9 times: 6% 10+ times: 5% DK: 7% Create and co-create content—collaborate and champion open systems Embrace and navigate the complexity
- Professor P.M. Forni co-founded the Johns Hopkins Civility Project in 1997. He is quoted as saying: “Civility means a great deal more than just being nice to one another. It is complex and encompasses learning how to connect successfully and live well with others, developing thoughtfulness, and fostering effective self-expression and communication. Civility includes courtesy, politeness, mutual respect, fairness, good manners, as well as a matter of good health. Taking an active interest in the well-being of our community and concern for the health of our society is also involved in civility.” Build active partnerships for common good Create affinity groups; look to peers &/or recognized leaders Use City Government Week or other recognized/designated times Follow the path of others—start your own civility campaign
- Pay Attention - Be Aware of Others & Sensitive to the Immediate Context of Actions Listen Closely - Understand Other Points of View Be Inclusive - Welcome All; Don't Exclude Anyone Don't Gossip - Remind Others of the Importance of this Practice Show Respect - Honor Others (Especially in Disagreement) Be Agreeable - Find Opportunities to Agree Apologize Sincerely - Repair Damaged Relationships Give Constructive Comments, Suggestions & Feedback - No Personal Attacks (Focus on Issues) Accept Responsibility - Don't Shift Blame; Share Disagreements Publicly