This article discusses ways to reconcile with a friend after a fight. It advises apologizing sincerely and focusing on understanding your own feelings. Common friends may feel awkward if forced to take sides after a breakup. The best thing to do when things go wrong with a close friend is to minimize contact, not react to provocation, and wish them well to reach closure. True friendship is accepting someone despite knowing their flaws.

1. SUNDAY 2 AUGUST 2009 BOMBAY TIMES, THE TIMES OF INDIA
5
A CONSUMER CONNECT INITIATIVE
Anju Maskeri & Deven Kanal fy your own feelings and get in minimise contact with that person broke up we had to take sides. It got
touch with yourself. If you need to and not react to any of their harsh so bad that we ditched the pair,”
apologise just do it. Don’t procras- words,” says Shetty. laughs Varun Dutta. But it may not
W
e all have someone who
we normally turn to in tinate,” says Harish Shetty, a not- Common friends often bear the always be practically possible to dis-
times of trouble, some- ed psychologist. brunt of such a fall out. Feelings of own a dear friend.
one special. We tell them all our In most cases a simple apology awkwardness emerge as they are in- The ultimate test of a friend is
secrets and they tell us all theirs. and a hug is enough to resolve evitably forced to take sides, choos- best summed up in the words of El-
It has often been said that true matters, but actions speak louder ing one friend over the other. “Two bert Hubard “Your friend is the man
friendship is rarer than true love.
However, as in any other relation-
than words. Kavita Iyer and Meera
Naidu had been as thick as thieves
HAVE YOU EVER FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND AND friends of mine from college were
dating each other. But when they
who knows all about you, and still
likes you.”
ship, friendship is peppered with
equal parts of sugar and spice.
as long as they can remember, but
now their relationship is at an
SAID THINGS IN A FIT OF RAGE THAT YOU NOW
Take the example of long-time end. “Meera suffers from a lying REGRET? READ ON TO FIND OUT WHAT YOU WAYS TO RECONCILE WITH A FRIEND WAYS TO DETACH
friends Rustom Daruwala and disorder. She would speak ill of
Aditya Singh. “We have been best me to our common friends and SHOULD DO TO WIN BACK FRIENDS WHEN
friends since we were ten, but
every once in a while we fight over
they would come and confront me.
When I spoke to her to clear the THEY TURN FOES 1. Know your own feelings 1. Don’t blame yourself
the most ridiculous things. Last air, she apologised and I let her 2. If possible write a note, call or SMS 2. Minimise contact
month, we fought because I could- into my life again. I later discov-
n’t cancel a family dinner in order ered that she was spreading false 3. Don’t actively avoid them at functions
or get-togethers 3. Don’t react to provocation
to catch a movie. This led to a rumours about my brother online,
heated argument and we haven’t and that was more than I could
bear.” 4. When things turn sour with a family 4. Wish well for that person
spoken since.” says Singh. Some-
times the silliest arguments can So what do you do when things friend don’t sever your relations with and you will automatically
lead to a rift that may get too wide go out of hand with your closest his or her family reach closure
to cross. “It is important to identi- friend? “The best thing to do is
UP TO
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ON FRIENDSHIP’S DAY, SHEETAL KHER GOES DOWN at
SUNDERBAI HALL
MEMORY LANE TO THE DAY WHEN HER BEST FRIEND Behind Income Tax Office, Churchgate, Mumbai 20.
HARISH IYER CAME OUT OF THE CLOSET AND CONFIDED IN HER [ 1 . ’}
jI
! 1T! t8 I IY
I I ! : JI
, I
I
Kavita Nair and adds cheekily Harish
.
More than I Lakh Titles on Display
proudly states, “She was the A to Z S ubj ects Available
A
first person I told and she
A
best friend is some-
one who stands up was very supportive of me.
for you during petty In fact she talked me into
school fights, or trusts you coming out of the closet and Iso 9001 - 2000 18 kt . IS Halknark Yellow and WillIe GokI Jewelle ry
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This is exactly how an ideal fact that every year they
best friend is supposed to spend their birthdays to-
be. Well what would one do gether and at the same or-
on realising that their best phanage. They continue ADVT
pal is gay or lesbian? their fight against child
Considering how the soci-
ety we live in is still not
completely open about gay
abuse through the docu-
mentaries that they pro-
duce.
Witness India ’s first ever
At the end all Sheetal
rights, friends are becoming
the ‘new family’ people con-
fide into. Two years ago, so-
wishes for her best friend is
fame and recognition for
Guj arati matrimonial symposium
cial activist Harish Iyer the person he is and she
glagna Utsav at Prime Mall, Irla (opp. Alfa) from Ft 1O Aug’09
th th
came out of the closet and sums it up by getting a little
told his best friend Sheetal emotional and saying, “ I
Kher about it and all she only wish he could see him-
said was “Cool”. On being self the way I see him.”
Dhanj i Bhai mm his start
ade (Vijay Mauhrat) The new
from humble beginnings. But, vers i on comes after a lot of
today he is amongst the who’s contemplation and positive
who of the city. He is affluent , feedback rr ceived frr m mthe
e o
well-known, and well-networked users. During this Utsav,
within the Gujarati samaj, but g lagna will introduce an
one nagging problem supersedes exc lusive glagna mela (a get-
She was the any of his other problems. He together) for postgraduates ,
first person I can’t finn his so n na brrde that
d i since glagna.com has received
mm his stature.
eets maximum feedback from them.
told this to and When Alpa Mehta excelled Finding a life partner after
she was very in her final MBA examinations , losing one midway throuu h life
g
it was not j ust a moment o f i s a sennitive i ssue ann nneds
s d e
supportive of celebration for the Mehta family. special attention. The Utsav will
me. In fact, she I was a mm enn for a v err big
t omm t y have an exclusive channel just to
question. How could they ever address the problem of widows,
talked me into find Alpa a life partner fromfrom widowers, and divorcees.
coming out of their community wwo is as
h But to reap the rich benefits
the closet and qualified as she is? of glagna.com , one should
Fin ding a suitab l e lif e partner become a member of the portal.
believing w ithin the Guj arat i samaj is a All one has to do is opt for any
in myself prr blem mhh t hhs pl agued thh
o t a a e of the four membership plans ——
entire community for some time Rajvi , Rajwadi, Royal Rajwadi ,
asked as to how easy it was nn w and mann Gujarr tis have
o y a and gRajwadi. To avail all the
for her to accept that fact, been voca l about it. Buu only one
t benefits of glagna.com , one has
she says, “Firstly, it is not young Guj arati entrepreneur to opt f or r t hh gRajwadi ppan .
e l
some kind of an illness or a
disease that I need to ac- thh ught of finding a solution to
o This plan n rr a perr o nn lized
offe s s a
cept, it is just a part of his the ppoblem. He conceptualized
r service-bouquet, which empowers
life and that too a personal you to sea rr h h nn conn
ann took grr at painn i n rr nn ing
d e s n b ig c a d tact select
thing. His sexual prefer-
ences do not make him a to life India ’s premier online toww this platform. glagna.com
ards ann top nn tch Gujarr ti prr files
d o - a o
bad human being. My Guj arati matrimonial portal is determined to solve all yourr while gla gn a.c om msees that you
whole concern was how he are nowhere in the ppcture.
i
was dealing with it.”
glagna.com. The portal is his mmrrmon ial prr blemm throughh
at i o s
She further adds, “I do initiative to assist Gujaratis in this Utsav. All one has to do is Make sure you visit glagna
not want him to be known finding an ideal life partner and visit Prime Mall , Irla during the
as a ‘gay icon’, I want peo-
Utsav at Prime Mall at Jrla to fmd
ple to know him for the per-
solving their marriage problems. UUtsav and share his problems tt e perfect solution for all your
h
son he is. The fact that he is To foster this initiative with the marriage associates of matrimonial problems. Registration
a social activist is not some- glagna.com has now launched glagnn .co mm
a . The D i ecto rr of the
rr s of
thing that he is known for.
is free till 14th August , 2009.
There is more to his person-
India s first ever Gujarati company along with their skilled
ality than just that. People matrimonial symposium —— mm iage associates will perr onn lly
arr s a
must realise that his being
gay does not mean that he
is not capable of contribut-
glagna Utsav.
T hh
e glagna Utsav is
attend to each individual’s
problem from 10 am to 8 pm glagna
ing to the society in any
positive manner.”
“If he brings a date along
scheduled from 1St August, 2009
to 10th August , 2009 at Prime
during this Utsav.
gUtsav will also see the 5
.com
BBulI
when we meet, I team up Mall, Irla. Many reputed and lauuch h o f a bb tter , f aster
n e
with his date and bully him. respected Gujaratis have come glagna. corn with unique features. contact@glagna.com
Isn’t that what you’d do
when your straight friend forward to show their support on 1st August, 2009 12.39 pmm . support g1agna.com
does the same,” she winks