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EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION
Change your
thinking and you
change your world.
Discuss the value of Stephen Covey’s Habit.
Identify the three components of verbal
communication and the percentage of
information found in each.
Explain the relationship of Self Talk to the
Communications model.
Describe the Arc of Distortion.
Utilize the Left-Hand Column Model to analyze
thoughts and feelings.
Performance Objectives:
4
What is an effective Communication?
What does being an Effective
Communicator mean to you?
What are the skill sets needed by an
Effective communicator?
What emotions contribute to
effectiveness?
Questions
QUALITIES AND SKILL BUILDING FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATOR
What’s missing in the
picture of this
tree?
QUALITIES AND SKILL BUILDING FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATOR
The roots!!!
QUALITIES AND SKILL BUILDING FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATOR
What are our
roots like?
BEHAVIOR * Skill
* Stated Knowledge
THOUGHTS
FEELINGS
* More likely aware
COGNITIVE
STRUCTURE
(thinking patterns)
BELIEFS AND
ATTITUDES
* Under the
surface
Source: Mark Carey, The Carey Group
“Seek first to understand and then
to be understood.”
Stephen R. Covey Habit #5
Stephen R. Covey,
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, 1990.
COMMUNICATION ASSESSMENT
Courageous Communication. Win-win;
we constantly learn from and grow with
each other.
Problems occur; we work to fix them.
Repeat as necessary. Pretty much on the
same page.
Agree to Disagree, then step away. I’d do
more if you would.
Adversarial; I win, you lose. It’s mostly
your fault. Contentious.
Sabotage Communication. Enemies,
enemies; everywhere you look.
Courageous Communication. Win-win; we
constantly learn from and grow with each
other.
Problems occur; we work to fix them.
Repeat as necessary. Pretty much on the
same page.
Agree to Disagree, then step away. I’d do
more if you would.
Adversarial; I win, you lose. It’s mostly
your fault. Contentious.
Sabotage Communication. Enemies,
enemies; everywhere you look.
COMMUNICATION AND TRUST
Empathy/Caring
Commitment/
Dedication
Honesty/Openness
Competence/
Expertise
3 COMPONENTS OF
COMMUNICATION
Language 7%
Body Language
55%
Paralanguage
38%
THE COMMUNICATION ICEBERG
Attitude, motivational
level
Communication
skill level
7-10%
90-93%
GROUP ACTIVITY
BEHAVIORS OF COURAGEOUS COMMUNICATION IN
SUPERVISION
16
“Seek first to
understand
and then
to be
understood.”
Stephen R. Covey
Behaviors of
Courageous
Communication
in Supervision
The Communication Model
The
Sender
The
Receiver
Feedback
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
FILTERS
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
FILTERS
The
Message
The Responsibilities of the Receiver
The Receiver
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
FILTERS
FILTERS
The Sender
The
Message
GROUP ACTIVITY
HOW DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE IS NOT LISTENING?
20
HOW DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE IS NOT
LISTENING?
Receiver Filters
What we are thinking and feeling,
Our Self Talk
while the other person is speaking.
Receiver Filters
Self Talk
The Receiver
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
FILTERS
FILTERSThe Sender
The
Message
I know you believe you understand what you
think I said, but I am not sure you realize that
what you heard is not what I meant. Unknown
What you
actually heard
Arc of “Distortion MAYBE
YES
Arc of Distortion
“Focus on the
Situation, Issue or
Behavior and Not
on the Person.”
Achieve Global
ADVOCACY AND INQUIRY
Advocacy: n. an advocating: a
speaking or writing in support (of
something)
Inquiry n. 1. The act of inquiring. 2.
An investigation or examination. 3. A
question; query.
1. Temporarily suspend your
internal filters
2. Listen
3. Ask questions about what
you hear
4. Ask more questions about
the answers you receive
FIGHT OR FLIGHT?
Fight
Expression of anger
Subtle sarcasm
Sharp answers
Clever comebacks
Belittling humor
Judgments
Flight
Withdrawal
Feeling sorry for
oneself
Sulking
Growing cold
Being indifferent
Escaping involvement
Escaping
responsibilities
Cognitive/Behavioral Model
Situation
FeelingsThoughts
Consequences
Behavior
Change your
thinking and you
change your world.
 Check your filters
 Check your Self Talk
 Work on reducing your Arc of
Distortion
 Practice the 4 Steps of Inquiry
Receiver Skill Sets
Responsibility of the Sender
The
Sender
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
FILTERS
FILTERS
The
Receiver
The
Message
Sender
Filters
• Left-hand Column • Right-hand Column
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
What I’m
thinking
What is
said
Left-hand Column
Exercise
Left-hand Column Right-hand Column
• Jon: I heard you bought
a new car.
• You: Yes, I got a new red
sports car.
• Jon: Really, what kind?
• You: A Jaguar.
• Jon: A brand new one
• You: You betcha.
Left-hand Column
Exercise
Right-hand Column
• Jon: I heard you bought
a new car.
• You: Yes, I got a new red
sports car.
• Jon: Really, what kind?
• You: A Jaguar.
• Jon: A brand new one
• You: You betcha.
Left-hand Column
• Jon: How can you afford
a new car?
• You: Woo hoo! Look at
me now
• Jon: Probably a Ford
• You: A Convertible
• Jon: It’s probably a 1970.
• You: Eat your heart out
Left-hand Column
Exercise
Right-hand Column
• Q: How long have you
been working as a
supervisor?
• A: About a year.
• Q: Have you had any major
concerns with staff?
• A: Yea, a couple of times.
• Q: So did you talk to
anyone about your
concerns?
• A: No, I didn’t want my
peers to think I was
weak.
Left-hand Column
Sender Filters
• Left-hand Column • Right-hand Column
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
What I’m
thinking
What is
said
• What was I trying to accomplish?
• Did I achieve the results I wanted?
• How might have my comments contributed
to the difficulties?
• Why didn’t I say what was in my left hand
column?
• What assumptions did I make about the
other person or people?
• How can I use my left-hand column as a
resource to improve communications?
Reflection: Using Your Left-hand
Column as a Resource
The Message
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
FILTERS
FILTERS
The
Sender
The
Receiver
The
Message
Communication Stoppers
• “This is the way it is…”
• “You’re wrong…”
• “What’s your proof…”
• “Whatever”
• “You…”
• We vs. They or Us vs. Them
• GOSSIP
41

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Effective communication for Nurse Manager