Recommended
More Related Content
What's hot
What's hot (20)
Similar to The art of verbal communication
Similar to The art of verbal communication (20)
Recently uploaded
Recently uploaded (20)
The art of verbal communication
- 1. Life Skill Learning for Young Minds
- 2. The Art of Communication July 2012
- 3. What is communication and why is it important? What is communication? The sharing or exchange of information (i.e. thoughts, ideas, and opinions) between two or more persons so that there is common understanding between them. If we are to be effective interpersonally, we should Have effective communication, Be effective in face-to-face communication, Avoid, or remove, the misunderstandings that arise in any communication situation.
- 4. Communication usually fails – except by chance! The normal speed at which a normal English speaker speaks is 125 to 175 words per minute. The speed at which the mind processes is 400 to 500 words per minute!! This difference between the speed of speaking and the speed of understanding is called the „word lag.‟ To the listener, it appears as if there are spaces between each word even the normal speaker speaks. We tend to fill up this bandwidth by doing things other than listening. If our distraction is momentary, we come back quickly, and don‟t lose anything. If we don‟t, we miss quite a lot of what is said to us. If any message can be understood in many ways, it will usually be understood in the way that can cause the most harm. In fact, studies have shown that if seven messages are sent, only one gets through effectively!
- 5. One Way Communication When the sender talks, and the receiver listens, communication has taken place. If we restrict ourselves to only this, then we have One way communication. Idea Encode Sender Speaks Writes Acts Draws Symbols Decode The receiver Listens Reads Observes Words Actions Pictures Numbers Idea
- 6. Effective Communication We see that one-way communication does not elicit the best results. So what else is required? If the communication is to be meaningful, then the receiver must give a response. He must acknowledge that he has heard the message, and understood it. This is called feedback. Transmission Phase Message Encoding Medium Decoding Receiver (now sender) NOISE Sender Decoding Medium Encoding Feedback Phase Message
- 7. Barriers and Filters to Communication The internal obstacles are those which exist within the sender and the receiver. These prevent the undistorted flow of communication. and hence they are called as Filters. These are the feelings that exist inside both parties, like shyness, superiority complex, disinterest, preconceived notions or opinions, rigid attitudes, anger, disappointment, sorrow etc. The external obstacles are distractions which exist outside both the sender and receiver, and prevent effective communication. These are called as Barriers. Examples - Noise, language, cross-talk, distance, mechanical failure, jargon, visual distraction etc.
- 8. How to overcome the barriers For the sender For the receiver • Be clear about the message to be sent • Be precise and to the point • Do not be verbose • Use a language understandable to the receiver • Write the message if required • Request a feedback to ensure receipt of message • Be attentive • Concentrate on the message • Ask for clarifications wherever required • Listen objectively • ‘Listen’ for body language • Make notes if required
- 9. The importance of Body Language What percentage of the message is conveyed by words, what percentage by tone, and what percentage by body language? Research has been carried out on this aspect, and it has been found that only 7 % of the message is conveyed by words, 38% by tone, and as much as 55 % by body language! As the ancient Chinese proverb says: “The body never lies, and the body never keeps quiet.”
- 12. Can you recognise these postures? 1 2 4 5 3 6
- 13. Can you recognise these postures? 1 2 4 5 3 6
- 14. The Art of Listening “Is there a sound in the forest if a tree crashes to the ground and there is no one to hear it?” The answer is that no, there is no sound. That is because there can be no sound till the act of hearing it is completed. Communication is not merely about talking to people. The people also have to listen.
- 15. Hearing vs. Listening The husband is having his breakfast, and reading the paper at the same time while in a hurry to go to work, and the wife wants to tell him all the gossip. Is he hearing or listening? Listening refers to the process of hearing a person, with attention being paid to his words, tone, and body language. Active listening is listening carefully, with the added effort of trying to understand the speaker‟s thoughts and feelings. Active listening also means showing or telling the other person that you have understood his message or his feelings. While doing so, you do not give any advice, you do not analyze the speech, nor do you question the speaker.
- 16. Active Listening Skills Suspending Judgment Paraphrasing Summarization Attending Skills Clarification
- 17. Active Listening skills: Suspended Judgement Suspended Judgement : This skill consists of So, while suspending judgement, Keeping an open mind. You do not have any pre-conceived notions about the speaker or the subject, and filter out any likes or dislikes about the style, delivery etc. Concentrate on understanding the speaker. Hear his complete message without interrupting him. Make him aware that you have understood him. You do not agree or disagree with the speaker. You do not ask him questions. You do not give advice. You do not start solving problems. You do not speak, but let the other person speak. While not doing so many things, should you just be staring at the speaker? No, you use the next skill of active listening.
- 18. Active Listening skills: Attending Skills Attending Skills: This consists of giving a response to the speaker, while he is speaking, by doing the following By maintaining eye-contact. By head nods. By making suitable sounds. By making verbal responses.
- 19. Active Listening skills: Clarification Clarification: This means doing two things Checking the meaning of words you do not understand. Checking with the speaker whether you have followed the subject correctly. During technical discussions, this skill should be used extensively for both the words and the subject matter.
- 20. Active Listening skills: Summarization Summarization: After the speaker finishes speaking, you repeat back to him, in a very short manner, the main points of what he has said to you.
- 21. Active Listening Skills: Paraphrasing Paraphrasing: In paraphrasing, you capture, in a short statement, the essence of what the speaker has said. Paraphrasing can be done whenever the speaker pauses for a break. While paraphrasing, you avoid Names, Criticisms, Hard/harsh words, and Controversy. You only stick firmly to the facts. You avoid the emotional content of the statement.
- 22. Exercise: Paraphrase the following remark “My boss, Mr. Raghavan, is a real tyrant. I have to work daily from 6 am to 9 pm. I am not able to pay any attention to my children. I am sick and tired of working in this factory.” “It appears that your working hours do not allow you to pay attention to your children, is that right?”
- 23. Example 1: I wasted a lot of time in attempting the first question, and as a result I had to hurry while answering the other questions. I don‟t know if the answers are good enough for me to pass the exam. “It appears that you are not satisfied with the answers in your exam as you spent a lot of time on the first question”
- 24. Example 2: Jyotsna came to my house, and said to me:”Amita, I would love to have lunch with you, but after the last fiasco I think I won‟t take the risk again.” I‟ll never speak to her again.
- 25. Example 3: My parents interfere a lot with whatever I want to do. They always keep advising me about everything. It‟s as if parents never want us to do what makes us happy.
- 26. Example 4: Younger brother to elder brother: “You are much more intelligent than I am, and that‟s why mother is ashamed of me. She loves you more than she loves me, and I hate this.”
- 27. Conclusion Communicating – essential aspects The role of body language Listening vs active listening Paraphrasing
Editor's Notes
- From childhood onwards, as we come into contact with other people, our aim is to let them know what our thoughts, feelings and perceptions are. At the same time, we listen to them to find out theirs. As we grow older, and take up a job, this process becomes even more important. Plans must be carried out, job assignments must be completed, group goals must be achieved. For all this interpersonal behaviour, it is necessary for us to interact with people, and to share with them our thoughts, feelings and perceptions. This art of sharing with other people is called communication.In the above definition, the most important features are:Sharing – This is an integral part of communication. In fact, it is the foundation of communication. Some even go so far as to say that sharing itself is communication.Common Understanding – Why is it important? Because words mean different things to different cultures.
- Lack of response can be a really frustrating thing. Suppose you are telling your friend about the latest book that you read, and he just keeps staring at you without any reactions whatsoever, then what are you to conclude? You are confused, and after a time become angry at being ignored. It is only when a response is given that the dialogue can continue.How many of you have heard the term ‘feedback?’ What does it mean? Is it also a response, or does it mean anything more? Well, feedback is first of all anacknowledgement that the message has been received, and then it goes on to tell the sender how successfully he has transmitted his message, and what is the effect of his message either on the receiver or on anybody else. It is one step above a response.
- 1. Confident 2. Confronting/ aggressive 3. Relaxed, confident 4. Defensive 5. Contemplative 6. Closed/ Stiff
- 1. Tense 2. Closed, defensive 3. Questioning 4. sad/ hopeless 5. Tense/ deep in thought 6. Stressed
- Let us analyze each sentence.1. “My boss, Mr. Raghavan, is a real tyrant” – contains a Name, Criticism, and HardWords.2. “I have to work from 6 am to 9 pm” – contains Facts.3. “I am not able to pay attention to my children” – contains Facts.4. “I am sick and tired of working in this factory” – contains Criticism, Hard Words,and Controversy.While paraphrasing, you avoid Names, Criticisms, Hard/harsh words, and Controversy. You only stick firmly to the facts. You avoid the emotional content of the statement. You start the paraphrase by using the words “In other words,” “I understand that,” “It appears that” etc, and repeat the facts shortly to the speaker.“It appears that your working hours do not allow you to pay attention to your children, isthat right?”