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1. Well, every veteran Sims player knows what a car with all four wheels off the ground
means: They’ve finally invented a viable anti-gravity device. Or you’re about to reach a
Dream Date. One or the other. So who was in the car, and how is this going to play out?
The best way to find out is to rejoin our story: Already in Progress…

2. ROBI: I’d like us to get engaged, actually.
ROSIE: Oh, now. You don’t have to say that just because we woohooed.
MARCEL: Um, yes he does, actually. Robi?
ROBI: Yes, sir?
MARCEL: You seem like a very nice boy. I like you. And if you don’t marry my
daughter now that you’ve woohooed her, I will personally break every bone in your body.
Even the one in your throat that isn’t connected to any other bone.
ROSIE: DadZee!
ZEESHAN: Don’t look at me. Mar, you want me to hold him while you get the baseball
bat?
Good thing they never found out about Aren…

3. And one trip to the courthouse later (pausing only to stop at the barbershop), Robi Scott
becomes Robi Sanders.
Aren’t shotgun weddings (okay, baseball bat weddings) romantic?

4. Colin has a problem: his hairline. Or perhaps more accurately, his lack thereof.
COLIN: Oh my Esme, Lee! I look like an old fart!
LEE: That’s because you are an old fart. You want cereal or pancakes for breakfast?
COLIN: Just coffee, thanks. Esme, when did I get so old?
And with a loss of hair comes a realization of one’s own mortality. At least until one’s
Hair Club for Men subscription kicks in.

5. COLIN: So, Lee, I’ve been thinking…We don’t have any children. That means that there
isn’t a legal heir to our estate. And under the inheritance laws in effect, Amy’s going to
be sole heir of Andrew and Opal’s estate, unless she voluntarily gives that up. So why
don’t we take in one of the boys after college and make him our heir? If we don’t, it’s all
just lost.
LEE: Sounds good. Which one?
COLIN: I don’t know. But barring any satellites falling from the sky, we’ve still got
some time to think about it.

6. And this, boys and girls, is what a permaplat game designer looks like. Andrew’s finally
made it. The bonus allowed me to put in the stairs to access the kid’s rooms. Just in time
for them to grow up and head off to college. (sigh) And speaking of growing up…

7. It looks like Amy’s grown up pretty. She doesn’t look any more like her mother than her
brothers do. Those Littledragon genes are strong. But why is she squinting so badly?

8. Ah. Glasses. I should have thought of that sooner.
And yes, this one’s a real tub pirate.

9. And while Chalcedony earns Creativity points instead of the Mechanical ones I told him
to work on, Jasper decides to score a date with Sophie Miguel.
Now, I don’t particularly like Sophie, and I never have. I think it’s her terrible fashion
sense. And she’s not really Jasper’s type either – he has very specific requirements that
she does not meet. But Pleasure Sims need dates, and teenage romances end with no hard
feelings, so Sophie gets invited over a fair bit.
And speaking of teenage romances, how’s Jasmine doing?

10. JASMINE (V.O.): I remember I used to come here with my Grampa all the time.
PERRY (V.O.): Uh-huh.
JASMINE (V.O.): I loved the décor. And I thought the waitresses were so great. The way
they’d call you “hon” and offer to put a scoop of ice cream on top of your pie…

11. PERRY: That costs more.
JASMINE: Yeah, I know. Esme, this place hasn’t changed a bit. Isn’t it great?
PERRY: (shrugs) It’s a diner. They’re all the same, aren’t they?
JASMINE: No. This one’s better.

12. Well, the uphill conversation was definitely a negative. They had an okay time, but that’s
all. I see Jasmine’s cousin Aren in the background there, so what say we go check in on
him?
Oh, you want to know about Jasmine’s parents? They’re great. Mitch found a new job at
his former level and will almost certainly get promoted at the end of his next shift.
Rommy plays the piano all the dang time and pretty much refuses to do anything else.
Now. Aren.

13. Aren, Aren, Aren. What am I going to do with you? Making time with pretty college girls
already? And you haven’t even introduced me.
Okay, I’m being facetious. You can’t introduce me, because you were never able to hear
me in the first place. This is Valerie Shankel.

14. And you move quickly.
AREN: So, Valerie. Care to join me?
VALERIE SHANKEL: Um, Aren? This looks like a kid’s room.
AREN: Huh? No, this is my room.
VALERIE: But you have this whole house. Why don’t you just sleep in the master
bedroom?
AREN: I…That’s Dad and Pop’s room. This is my room.
VALERIE: Aren…honey…let me explain something to you, okay? Downstairs.

15. VALERIE: Aren? Your dads? They don’t need that room any more.
AREN: But –
VALERIE: Shhh. Just listen to me.
Oh.
I should have known.
Well, Valerie seems to have that under control, so let’s just leave her to it, shall we?

16. Kitty moved in with Mircea temporarily after college –
KITTY (V.O.): And brought $20,000 for construction on the house. Be sure and mention
that.
You just did. So Kitty moved in temporarily –
KITTY (V.O.): $20,000 makes up for college, right?
No. I don’t care if this house takes generations to build. I do care how long it takes to
construct the dorm. So you moved in with –
KITTY (V.O.): Do we have to do this? Why don’t you check in with Jon and Emmy?
Aren’t they expecting?
What? What don’t you want me to see?

17. Ah.
MIRCEA: Kitty – do you like me? I mean, as a boyfriend?
KITTY: Mircea, we’ve been friends a long time, so I’m going to warn you: Don’t ask me
that question ever again. In fact, I’m willing to pretend you never asked it in the first
place.
MIRCEA: But –
KITTY: This. Topic. Is. Closed.
Wow…wasn’t that kind of harsh? I mean, you have two bolts.
KITTY (V.O.): Boltage isn’t everything.

18. But you’ll share a bed with him.
KITTY (V.O.): Well, there’s not room for a third bed. But it’s just sleeping.
Why? I mean, you’re best friends, your relationship is like 98/100, he likes girls, you like
guys, you have those two bolts without even trying, you have matching turn-ons…
KITTY (V.O.): I can’t.
What do you mean, you can’t?
KITTY (V.O.): I mean, switch to Jon and Emmy now, or I’ll corrupt all your data files.
And you know it’s been too long since your last back up.
Okay, okay. Sheesh!

19. Jon is thrilled at the prospect of being a father.
JON: Hi, baby! I’m your daddy! When are you going to come out and meet us?

20. Oh, right about…now.
I think it’s fair to say that the parents are happy, don’t you?

21. This is Sarah Jane. At the moment, she looks exactly like her father, doesn’t she? But
then, all babies have that Face One look, so we’ll just have to wait and see who she really
favors.
Definitely Jon’s coloring, though.
CASSIE (V.O): Um, hello?
Yes, Cassie?

22. CASSIE: You can’t get pregnant from your first woohoo, can you?
Well, actually…yes, you can.
CASSIE: Oh crud. (vomits)
Is there something you want to tell me?

23. CASSIE (V.O): It’s just that if I’d known, we’d have been a little more careful.
You and Alvin?
CASSIE (V.O): Yeah.
You really never, uh, before?
CASSIE (V.O): With who? They were all schmucks.
Point. Um, nice dress.
CASSIE (V.O): Thanks. It’s my wedding dress.

24. Oh. Oh, you got married?
CASSIE (V.O): That’s usually why you buy a wedding dress. ‘Scuse me. (disgusting
noises)

25. Erk. So, uh, Alvin finally asked you?
CASSIE (V.O): I asked him. And he said yes.
Was I right about the money?
CASSIE (V.O): Seventeen K.
Does he get along with the family?

26. CASSIE (V.O): He seems to get along with DadZee and DadMar. I’m not too sure about
Rosie.
Why not?

27. ROSIE: If you hurt my sister, I will kill you. Slowly.
CASSIE (V.O): That’s why. Listen, if you don’t mind, I’d rather just be alone with the
toilet right now.
Sure. Sorry. Uh, feel better.
CASSIE (V.O): (vomits)

28. ROBIN: That’s it. Refund, please.
SAMANTHA ROYCE THE MATCHMAKER: What? She’s a nice girl!
ROBIN: Of course she is. They all are. But I want true love, and you’re not delivering.
SAMANTHA ROYCE THE MATCHMAKER: Oh, come on, Mr. Sanders. I have a
reputation to keep up.
ROBIN: Then you should come up with three bolts. (to Ivy Copur senior) I’m sorry,
ma’am. It was a real pleasure to meet you.

29. ROBIN: Hey, Yvette. Thanks for coming over.
YVETTE: What are best friends for? So how’d it go with the matchmaker? Did you find
three bolts yet?
ROBIN: No. I’m starting to wonder if they even exist. I’m just going to have to resort to
the old-fashioned methods of finding a wife. Which is why I asked you over, actually. Do
you still give dance lessons?
YVETTE: Social dancing a specialty, yup.
ROBIN: Will you teach me?

30. YVETTE: Hands on the shoulderblades, bub. Let them drift too much further south and
you’re likely to get slapped.
ROBIN: Oh. Sorry.

31. ROBIN: So, Yvette…this is for you.
YVETTE: For me?
ROBIN: Yes.
YVETTE: What is it?
ROBIN: It’s a watch. Why?
YVETTE: Well, then, I can’t accept it. My mother told me never to accept jewelry from
men I wasn’t related to.
ROBIN: A watch is jewelry? Oh wait – this is the Sims. Okay, then. If we were married,
would that be related enough for you to accept the watch?

32. That looks like a yes to me.
Yes, I know I was going for True Love with Robin. But it didn’t matter how much I gave
the matchmaker, it was just two bolts, two bolts, two bolts. I consider that good enough
for everybody else. And Robin kept having that great big Fall In Love want roll up all the
time. And Yvette kept calling and stopping by. And they’re dressed alike! I finally gave
in.
Let’s check in with Stacey, shall we?

33. LUCKY: So, Stace…when are you and Tobes going to get engaged?
STACEY: Why would we want to do that?
LUCKY: Why…? Weren’t you the one nagging Byron about it?
STACEY: Aw, he wanted to get engaged. He just needed a push. Tobes and I don’t feel
any particular urgency on that score.
LUCKY: Well, what if you had kids?
STACEY: We won’t. Tobes is …fixed. He’s a carrier for Tricou genes, you know.
LUCKY: Oh. Lanthee. That’s pretty serious. I’m sorry.
STACEY: Don’t be. We’re happy the way we are. How’s Tyger?

34. CARYL: Okay, sweetie, blow out the candles!

35. TYRONE: Hi, Daddy! Hiii! Did you see that?
LUCKY: Yes, I saw that.
TYRONE: I blew out all the candles in one breath. Did you see that?
LUCKY: Yes, I saw. Well done!
TYRONE: Did you get it on camera?
LUCKY: Yes, I got it on camera.

36. Yes, now Tyrone is a big boy. Big enough to help his daddy in the garden. He seems to
share Lucky’s love for growing things.

37. And big enough to attend his uncles’ wedding, although he isn’t big enough to show up
in the pictures. He’s behind Yvonne – you can see his plumbbob and the tip of one shoe.

38. Or big enough to stay up until the party ended at midnight. It was a roof-raiser, even
though Tyrone had to go to bed in the middle of it. Everyone in the family did their part.
Yvonne by hitting the bar more often than a lady of her mature years really should.
Lucky and Caryl –

39. Well, you can probably figure out what they did to help raise the party score.
TYRONE (authoritatively): It’s a girl.
CARYL (amused): Really? How can you tell?
TYRONE: She told me. Can I talk to the baby again after I finish my homework?
CARYL: Sure.

40. Unfortunately, Yvonne is starting to show signs of slipping.
YVONNE: Ricky? Is that you?
YVONNE: But you – left. I remember.
YVONNE: Well, if you could come back, why didn’t you come back for the wedding?
You love weddings. They had an open bar and everything.
BYRON: Mom? Who are you talking to?

41. So I guess it isn’t really such a surprise that this happened.
YVONNE: What do you mean, that’s my timer? That isn’t my timer.
GRIM REAPER: ..s it i.. ..me o..
YVONNE: No it isn’t. Look, the label says “Yvonne Sanders Miller.” My middle name
is, um, Martha. Yeah, that’s right, Martha. After my aunt.
GRIM REAPER: Ni.. .ry.

42. Yvonne Sanders Miller, age 69. Despite her protestations to the contrary, Yvonne did not
have a middle name. (Although her aunt was indeed named Martha.) Yvonne rose very
high in the medical career, and probably would have topped it if her husband hadn’t had a
LTW to have three children graduate from college. Her own LTW (never achieved) was
to become a criminal mastermind, but that would have devastated Ricky, so she never
pursued it. Yvonne looked rather like a hawk, but was nevertheless the best-looking of
the eight Sanders children.

43. Now, when Byron chose Jerome as the one for him, I admit to thinking “No children.
Fewer households to keep up with. Hooray!” After all, Popularity Sims such as Byron
and Jerome rarely care about children of their own. However, I bet that if I had Free Time
they’d both have Family as a secondary. Both Byron and Jerome kept rolling the want to
adopt a child. Often they’d roll it at the same time. It kept coming back and coming back,
so…
This is Amy Miller. She likes racecars.

44. I mis-timed the call to the adoption agency, so Amy showed up when her new fathers
were both at work. Caryl tried to welcome her.
AMY: Whoa! Who are you? I don’t think so.
It’s fair to say that Caryl and Amy didn’t get off on the right foot.

45. But she hit it right off with Tyrone.
AMY: Okay, you be the zombie servo family sim and I’ll be the plantsim vampire rock
god.
TYRONE: Can we move in the alien werewolf family? All five of them?
AMY: Sure. But they’re going to have to sleep on the floor because there’s no room.
Speaking of which, I don’t know where we’re going to put Tyrone’s brother or sister, I
really don’t. I hope I have that figured out by the next installment.
See you then!
******************
The Grim Reaper’s lines, in order:
Yes it is. Come on.
Nice try.