Weddings! Birthday! Argument!

1. Hello hello and welcome back! Good to see you again! I’m sure you remember
everybody from last time, right? Of course you do.
Let’s see…last time, I think I promised you a wedding. Weddings are always nice places
to start stories. So, let’s rejoin our story… Already in Progress…

2. ORION: So tell me again why I'm not just locking my son in the basement until he's old
enough to know better? Say, fifty-seven or so?
MARIE: We don't have a basement, dear. Besides, Peter's a nice boy. I don't know why
you don't like him.
ORION: He tried to tell me the joke about the juice drinker who went on the wagon.
MARIE: I told you that one and you laughed so hard you nearly wet your pants.
ORION: Yeah, but you don't tell it to someone you just met.

3. MARIE: Orion Curious Sanders, are you saying you don't trust your son?
ORION: Of course I do!
MARIE : Then trust him to make his own decisions. He's getting married today, and you
are going to be happy for him. Don't you remember what it was like to be young and in
love with the whole world ahead of us?

4. ORION (V.O.): (sigh) Yes. Yes, I do.

5. MARIE: Then no more of this grumpy nonsense?
ORION: No ma'am, none. ...But he's still my little boy.
MARIE: That will never change, dear.

6. And so Hunter Sanders became Hunter Fuchs. Orion got 5,000 aspiration points out of
the deal, despite all his protests. And the party was a roof-raiser. But the best part?

7. PETER: Mr. Sanders, I just want you to know that even though we maybe dint get off on
the right foot when we first met, I really love your son and I'm gonna do my best to make
him happy. You won't have any reason to worry.
ORION: Thank you, Peter. I appreciate that.
HUNTER (calling): Pete! The taxi’s here! Hurry, or we’ll miss our flight!
PETER: Keep yer hair on! I’m comin! (to Orion) I mean it, Mr. Sanders. I’m gonna take
good care of him.
ORION: I know. And Peter? You can call me Dad if you want to.
HUNTER: Pete! Come on!
PETER: Thanks…Dad.
I was afraid these two were never going to be able to have a conversation at all, let alone
a civil one. It seems that Orion’s finally warmed up to his son-in-law. Hooray!

8. MARIE: Are you okay, Rommy? You seem quiet.
ANDROMEDA: Hmmm…? Yeah, I’m okay. I’m just thinking about college.
MARIE: College? Or Hunter’s wedding?
ANDROMEDA: …Mom? Do you think anyone will ever want to marry me?
MARIE: Of course, sweetheart! Someday you will meet that special boy or girl –
ANDROMEDA: Boy. Definitely.
MARIE: Okay. Someday you will meet that special boy, and then you’ll see.
ANDROMEDA: But I haven’t met anybody yet.
MARIE: You’re still young. Do you know how I met your father?
ANDROMEDA: You moved into the same dorm at the same time…
MARIE: …And he pulled out a pillow and hit me in the face with it, yup. I didn’t even
know his name. (smiles nostalgically) It’ll probably be just as random for you. In the
meantime, enjoy life, make friends, be open…and don’t worry about it.
ANDROMEDA: (sigh) Okay, Mom. Thanks.
And speaking of college, now might be a good time to mention…

9. …that Alice, Colin, and Andrew are all there. Here we see Alice and Andrew. Colin
would be very unhappy with me if I were to show you what he looks like just at the
moment, so I won’t.
This is all you’ll see of the college crew this time around. There is definitely enough
going on to justify a separate chapter, and that’s just what you’re going to get.
I also know about things like Roof On and going up one level for long shots like
this…now. Sorry I didn’t back then.

10. Okay, I lied. I couldn’t resist. That guy in the orange shirt? Colin. (snickers)

11. Colin and Andrew’s parents are doing as well as can be expected, considering that they
never speak to each other. Elaine seems to have someone she enjoys speaking with on the
phone, though. Hours, she spends. Laughs a lot, too.

12. Without his older brothers to run interference, Jon spends most of his time in the home
gym. Or his room. Or at work. Or anywhere his parents aren’t, really. He cannot wait to
get to college himself, although that won’t happen for at least four years, if ever. It’s hard
to keep his grades up. Maybe he can get in on a sports scholarship…
Let’s check on a slightly more functional family, shall we?

13. I did say “slightly,” mind. I hope things are continuing to go well…
FRANCOIS: So how did you like spending time with your cousins, kiddo? Was
everything okay yesterday?
ROBIN: Oh, it was lots of fun. We had a water balloon fight. Me and Byron teamed up
on Lucky and Stacey. Did you know Lucky and Byron are twins? Like you and Uncle
Pierre. And they said their mom's a twin too, but I said she couldn't be because she's a lot
younger than Aunt Marie, and I was right, wasn't I?
FRANCOIS: Actually, Aunt Yvonne is a twin – she's twins with Uncle Marcel.
ROBIN: Oh. I thought twins were always two boys or two girls.
FRANCOIS: No, you can have twins that are a boy and a girl.
ROBIN: But then how do they dress alike?
FRANCOIS: Um...

14. ROBIN: Anyway, they had a cake with candles and then we blowed horns and yelled a
lot because it was Stacey's birthday. And then she blowed out the candles and growed up
big and everybody yelled hooray and I came home.
FRANCOIS: I was wondering about that. Why did you come home? Uncle Ricky said
you wouldn't even stay for cake.
ROBIN: Because I had to go to school today. You said I have to be in bed at a ree-
reasonable time on school nights so I can do well in school.
FRANCOIS: Yes, but I didn't mean you had to miss your cousin's birthday party and not
have any cake! It's okay to stay up a little later sometimes for special occasions. Uncle
Ricky or Aunt Yvonne will always bring you home in plenty of time.
ROBIN: Oh. (thoughtful pause)

15. ROBIN: So can I have some cake now, then?
FRANCOIS: Of course.
Well, that seems to be going nicely. Aside from the whole walls-down-and-visible-
plumbbobs thing. (cringes)
I must have some better shots around here somewhere. Let’s see…

16. Oh, this one’s nice. Required vast amounts of cursing and about fifteen tries to get, but it
turned out nice.
It looks like someone got a little too much sun. But they seem to be having a good time.

17. And Peter appears to be a dab hand with the aloe, so that’s good too.
Honeymoons are really about just two people, so let’s give them some alone time, shall
we?

18. STACEY: So here’s all my birthday money. Can you find me a nice boy? Maybe one
who goes to my school so people at school can sort of see that I have a real live boyfriend
and I’m not making it up? Maybe a kind of popular boy? Or at least one that doesn’t look
like he was hiding behind the door when they handed out the good looks? Maybe one that
thinks I’m pretty? Oh, and with dark hair, please?
SAMANTHA ROYCE THE MATCHMAKER: You want that in a particular shoe size,
too, hon?
STACEY: No, I’m not picky. Oh – and can you arrange it so people don’t know we met
through you? I don’t want everybody to think I’m some kind of loser…
SAMANTHA ROYCE THE MATCHMAKER: That’ll cost you another forty.
STACEY: Um, okay…
SAMANTHA ROYCE THE MATCHMAKER: I’ll drop him at the corner for ya. He’ll
be around in a minute.

19. STACEY: Dad, Byron, Lucky, this is my, uh, friend Toby Livingston from school. He
was, um, just passing and stopped to say hi.
LUCKY: Wow! Toby Livingston! Can you really shoot a watermelon seed out your
nose?
TOBY: (chuckle) Well, yeah, but it isn't as hard as it sounds. I'll show you some time,
huh?
RICKY: Hey, which of you two wants to help me fix the upstairs shower?
BYRON and LUCKY (in unison): Me!
STACEY (mouths silently to her father): Thank you!
KIDS! Please do not try to shoot a watermelon seed out your nose! It can cause injury or
even death to innocent bystanders!

20. TOBY: No way! You mean it wasn't really true about the gorilla and the very small
unicycle?
STACEY: No, and now he's so upset he won't even go down to the community center.
TOBY: Huh -- I wouldn't let a little thing like that keep me away from a great hangout.
STACEY: So, um, speaking of the community center, sometimes I go skating there with
my brothers, and I thought maybe you'd like to come with us some time -- I mean if you
don't mind hanging out with a couple of little kids like that.
TOBY: Nah, I'd love to come. Your brothers are cool by me.
Wow. I guess sometimes matchmaker drops work out. Who’da thunk it?

21. HUNTER: Why do we have to leave in the middle of the night? We flew ten hours to get
here!
PETER: Because we can't afford it. Have you seen what the hotel bill comes to?
HUNTER: That's what credit cards are for.
PETER: No it isn’t. You dint grow up on a first name basis with the Repo Man. Ours was
named Keith, and I saw more a him than I ever did of my mom. I am never going through
that or putting my family through that again ever! I swore I would never charge one dime
I dint have cash to back up and now we're in the hole for nearly a thousand bucks.

22. HUNTER: But I told you, my parents said to just forward the bills to them...
PETER: I don't do that. I'm gonna to support my family myself, like my mom never
could.
HUNTER: But didn't your dad --
PETER: I never was sure which onea my mom’s so-called “boyfriends” he was, a'right?
I'm gonna to take care of us and part a that is bein fiscally responsible.
HUNTER: You're being unreasonable.
PETER: Fine. Think what you want. We're still leavin. Now.

23. ROSALIE: DadMar, will you help me with my homework?
MARCEL: You don't have any homework yet, sweetie. You haven’t been to school yet.
ROSALIE: But I want to do homework! You’re a teacher. Can’t you give me some?
MARCEL (doubtfully): Well, I…
CASSIE: Have her do mine, DadMar. I don’t want to. – Whee!
MARCEL: The point is for you to do your own homework, Cassie…
ROSALIE: Oh, please, DadMar?
CASSIE and ROSALIE (in unison): Pleeeeeease?

24. ROSALIE: I'm going to go to school tomorrow, DadZee!
ZEESHAN: Yes, you are. You're getting big so fast.
ROSALIE: And I get to sit at a desk and do homework and everything!
ZEESHAN: That's great, honey.
ROSALIE: And I have my bag all packed with school supplies and I picked out what I'm
going to wear already and everything!
ZEESHAN: You’re very prepared.
ROSALIE: Isn’t it just the best thing in the whole world?
ZEESHAN: Um…
Well, you see, Rosie, your DadZee must be the only Knowledge sim in the whole world
who can’t stand talking about school. Maybe you should go talk to your DadMar the high
school teacher instead. Or better yet, go watch your sister age up.

25. …which she did in a terrible shot with a giant plumbbob front and center. So instead, for
your viewing pleasure, here’s a picture of everyone after the happy event.
ROSALIE: Dad-deeee! You’re ruining the picture!

26. HEDY: Oooh, that -- that bastard!
GALILEO: Who, Francois?
LYDIA: What he doing now?

27. HEDY (V.O.): I was walking past the Burger Knight, minding my own business, when
what do I see but that...that...
GALIELO (V.O.): Schmuck?
HEDY (V.O.): Tramp! That tramp kissing Cathy whatsername's hand!
LYDIA (V.O.): I thought tramp was only woman.
HEDY (V.O.): We have equal opportunity now. Men can be tramps too.

28. GALILEO (V.O.): So what did you do?
HEDY (V.O.): What do you think? I went in there and gave him a piece of my mind!
Then I slapped him good and told him I never wanted to see him again!
GALILEO (V.O.): Well, you're seeing Gabe Stewart, aren't you? You're not exactly clean
yourself.
HEDY (V.O.): I only started seeing him after Francois...after he...Oh, shut up!

29. HEDY: Now remember, Mircea, just because you have money doesn't mean you can treat
women any old way you like. You need to be nice to them. And it's better to be friends
with them first, before you start any sort of romantic relationship.
LYDIA: Relationship are work. (amused) ...Do you understanding any of this?
WOBBLY WABBIT HEAD: The sheep says
WOBBLY WABBIT HEAD and MIRCEA: "BAAAA!"
Francois isn’t really that bad, is he?

30. ROBIN (bursting into room): Mr. Daddy, looklooklook! I got an A+!
FRANCOIS: Yeah! That's my boy!
ROBIN: ...Mr. Daddy, why is that lady standing there in her underwear?
FRANCOIS: Um...Daddy wasn't feeling so good today, so he stayed home from work
and his friend Miss Trottier came over to help him feel better. She was just leaving. –
How about I read you a story?
Okay, maybe he is. But he does love his son.

31. And Robin loves his Daddy. Awww.
And speaking of love…

32. HUNTER: Pete? I've been thinking... Dickens wrote "Annual income twenty pounds,
annual expenditure nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual
expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery." So I can understand where you're
coming from, and I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
PETER: 'Sokay, baby. I shoulda talked about it with ya first. (half-mumbles) Dang
literature majors, wakin you up with quotes.
HUNTER: So I thought I'd call in the morning?
PETER (while yawning): 'K.
I’m glad they were able to make up. I like Hunter and I don’t want him to be unhappy.
But I guess we’ll have wait til Chapter 3 to find out what he’s going to call about. I hope
you’ll come back. And okay, we haven’t gotten to the pictures yet where I got the hang of
plumbbobs, but we will. Really!
PS: If you can tell me why the Repo Man was named Keith, I will give you a cookie.