1.
Published
on
LinkedIn.
Sept
5,
2015.
Effective Communication - Are you really listening?
By Rash Khan (https://au.linkedin.com/in/rashkhan1)
The purpose of this article is to share with you an "Aha!" moment for me that
happened at AIM Open House Leadership Conference while listening to a talk from
Jane Toohey on effective communication.
Are You Really Listening!!
Listening is a skill we take for granted. It’s a skill we practice as soon as we wake up
until we hit the bed again at night. How hard could listening be? Much to my surprise
the 'Aha' moment for me was when Jane Toohey introduced the concept of our 'Inner
Voice' having a negative impact on our listening.
Inner Voice is the internal monologue that we have with ourselves in our mind. I
learnt that when we think we are listening to someone we are not really listening, we
are speaking to our inner voice to work out what to say next. We do this
subconsciously without even realising. Aha!!
We did an exercise to prove the concept, which I am sharing with you and strongly
encourage you to try out. Speak to a friend, colleague or even your partner for 3
minutes where you exchange information about the activities you did this week. Then
play back each others activities afterwards with as much detail as possible based on
what you listened. Did you get all of them right? I didn't! Because half way through
the conversation I started thinking of what I was going to say and missed some key
activities that my exercise partner was talking about.
I am now self aware about my inner voice when listening to my staff, colleagues,
friends and family. Constant interruption of my inner voice while listening is not
something I will learn to control overnight but through practice this isn't impossible.
Being a better listener is extremely important for me because I want to be a better
leader. Listening is a key element of leadership because it demonstrates care &
respect. Listening is also a key tool to influence positive behaviour. Most importantly
listening is the core ingredient for effective communication.
Call to Action
Check out the Awesome TED Talk by Julian Treasure on 'Five ways to Listen Better'.
My challenge to you when you are having a conversation next - Are you really
listening? :)
Signing off with an awesome quote from Steven R. Covey -