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Quick Start
Comms 321
The inverted pyramid
 Write a terse lead
 Provide background
 Present news in order
of descending
importance
 Use quotations early
and throughout
 Use transitions
 Do not editorialize
 Avoid “the end”
Summary lead or “lede”
 Summarizes the news – Ws and the H
 Who
 What
 When
 Where
 Why
 How
Tips for lead writers
 Identify the Ws and H.
 Decide which element is the most important to
the reader.
 Try to stick to one main idea.
 Write one sentence of no more 35 words.
 Write in past tense.
 Use subject-verb-object order.
 Sometimes the subject lends itself to a lead with
flair.
Summary lead
WASHINGTON – The Supreme Court
preserved affirmative action in university
admissions on Monday by only a one-vote
margin but with a forceful endorsement of
the role of racial diversity on campus in
achieving a more equal society. (New York
Times,35 words)
Multi-element or double-barreled
leads
Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh
met with one of his lawyers Thursday
about his chances of avoiding execution,
even as prison officials moved full speed
ahead to carry out the death sentence in
five days.
Pitfalls
 -- Trying to put the “when” or time
element first and using the exact time,
when more general time will do.
 Example:
 At 6:15 a.m. today police found a suspect in a
kidnapping of a Provo girl.
 Better: Police arrested a suspect in the
kidnapping of a Provo girl early Friday.
Pitfalls
 -- Writing a lead that sounds like a
newspaper headline or lead in for a news
broadcast (usually in present tense and
without articles).
 Example:
 Police arrest suspect in Provo kidnapping.
 Police arrested an Orem man Thursday in
connection with the kidnapping of a Provo girl.
Pitfalls
 Buried leads or “so what?” leads
Police Chief John Jones discussed the city’s crime
problem with interested townspeople at a
meeting Monday night.
So what? What is the problem?
There were more serious crimes reported in
Provo last year than during any 12 months in
the city’s history, the city’s police chief said
Monday night. (26 words)
Pitfalls
 -- Stating the obvious. Don’t just say that
something happened, but what was significant
about what happened.
 Example:
 President Hinckley spoke to a large crowd Sunday and a
choir performed during the annual program honoring the
Mormon pioneers.
 Better:
 Latter-day Saints should emulate pioneer values of
courage and integrity, LDS Church President Gordon B.
Hinckley told hundreds gathered at a fireside Sunday
night.
Pitfalls
 -- Using the name of little-know person in a lead.
Delay the identification of most people, unless
they are well known because of position or
notoriety.
 Example:
 BYU student Josh Jones faces charges in connection with
a hit-and-run accident that caused a pileup on I-15
yesterday.
 Better:
 Police arrested a 21-year-old BYU student Tuesday in
connection with a hit-and-run accident that caused a
pileup on I-15.
Pitfalls
 -- Using a question in the lead.
 -- Using a direct quotation in the lead
 -- Try one sentence first.
 -- Using “you” in the lead.
Pitfalls
 Too many words
 In a bold bid to pursue the Republican economic agenda and spur economic
growth, President Bush plans to propose a sweeping package that would
eliminate the taxes individuals pay on stock dividends, accelerate income-
tax-rate cuts approved two years ago and provide $400 rebate checks for
middle-class parents. (47 words) Wall Street Journal
 President Bush will propose today to stimulate the economy by eliminating
the tax on stock dividends and by cutting taxes this year for nearly 100
million taxpayers, at a cost of around $600 billion to the federal Treasury
over 10 years. (41 words) Reuters
 President Bush yesterday said the economic plan he's unveiling today -
including family tax cuts and an end to taxing stock dividends - is geared to
"the working citizen," and he rejected Democratic charges that it's aimed at
the rich. (40 words) New York Post
Hints for success
 Start trying to think of new ways to write leads.
 Example of a feature lead:
 Kathy Porter, principal of Westmore Elementary
in Orem, knows she must find a way to boost
scores. And a mathematics program she's
considering, hoping it will do the trick, has
proven to be controversial.
Hints for success
 Don’t go with the first lead – rewrite
 Avoid superfluous words
 Write clearly and concisely
 Use vivid verbs
 Use colorful words
 Use Subject-Verb-Object order -- S-V-O
Compelling leads
To find a lead that will work, first consider
the focus or the theme of your story. Here
are some questions to help you think
about your theme:
What one thing does the reader need to
know more than any other?
What would make the reader say to
someone else, "Listen to this!"
Is there an anecdote that captures the
essence of the story?
Compelling leads
What concrete specifics reveal the
significance of the story?
What is the history behind the story?
What are the key problems to be
solved in writing this story?
Source: Compiled by Dr. Sherry Ricchiardi, associate professor, Indiana University School of
Journalism (Indianapolis). Adapted with permission.
Things to remember
 Attend desk meetings
 Update your Route Y forwarding address
 Plagiarize and you’re out
 Get your hair cut!
 Cover your beat even during holidays and last week
 Leave early or come in late = lost points
 Listen up! No laptops, ipods cell phones in class
 Think art! Photo orders are part of the story prep process
 Late assignments – no points
 Read your story outloud
 Turn off the editor
 Let it rest if you can
Time-saving tips
 Check the morgue
 Cast a wide net
 Don’t over report
 Get three balls in the air
Unoriginal sources
 Conduct your own interviews! Don’t use other sources unless deadline is in
two minutes and you MUST have the quote. (Of course that doesn’t count
if you’ve procrastinated for three days to call a source.) Otherwise it is lazy
reporting not worthy of an A.
 New York Times rule: If you didn’t conduct the interview give the source.
 “It’s a lot like chicken pox,” Masters said in an e-mail.
 “It is a dark day in America,” said House Minority Leader Ralph Becker, D-Salt Lake,
in a news release.
 “Private prisons are a great idea,” Marvin Jensen, CEO of Corrections Corporation of
America, told the New York Times.
 “Private prisons are a threat to the safety of corrections officers,” Jim Stimson,
leader of the a correctional officers union, said in a union news release. (This was
posted on a Web site, but no reference to delivery medium is necessary).
 “Our stock is going through the roof,” Ralph Merit, CEO of Dot.com, was quoted on
thestreet.com Web site.
 “We’re at the end of our rope,” stranded miner Jack James told the Associated Press.
 “It’s time to end the impasse,” Williams told the Deseret Morning News.
More attribution
 Avoid "according to" except when quoting documents. "Said" is fine in most cases.
 Make sure your quotes are adequately introduced.
 Bad example:
Students on campus took notice of the commemoration. Miles Pomeroy, a senior
from Mesa, Ariz., majoring in physiology and developmental biology, is one such
student. "The anniversary means more because of the lowered flag," said Pomeroy
(Pomeroy said). "I like that people volunteer to show forth their respect for what has
happened."
 In addition to honoring the lives of the individuals lost on Sept. 11, the vigil was
meant to serve another purpose.
(INTRODUCE NEW SPEAKER HERE)"My hope is that through this flag vigil and our
continued example of patriotic service we may inspire others with a similar sense of
national pride and determination," said Jenson.
 Subject-verb in attribution -- Jenson said.
 Avoid “there is”
Ethical/process issues
 Where possible ask the source to review their quotes.
Please allow adequate time for review.
 While it may be legal, it is not ethical to tape a
conversation without first getting permission from the
source
 Identify who you are, that you are from the Daily
Universe and you want to interview for a story for
publication. Make sure they understand they are “on the
record” to use their name and what is said.

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Quick start leads

  • 2. The inverted pyramid  Write a terse lead  Provide background  Present news in order of descending importance  Use quotations early and throughout  Use transitions  Do not editorialize  Avoid “the end”
  • 3. Summary lead or “lede”  Summarizes the news – Ws and the H  Who  What  When  Where  Why  How
  • 4. Tips for lead writers  Identify the Ws and H.  Decide which element is the most important to the reader.  Try to stick to one main idea.  Write one sentence of no more 35 words.  Write in past tense.  Use subject-verb-object order.  Sometimes the subject lends itself to a lead with flair.
  • 5. Summary lead WASHINGTON – The Supreme Court preserved affirmative action in university admissions on Monday by only a one-vote margin but with a forceful endorsement of the role of racial diversity on campus in achieving a more equal society. (New York Times,35 words)
  • 6. Multi-element or double-barreled leads Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh met with one of his lawyers Thursday about his chances of avoiding execution, even as prison officials moved full speed ahead to carry out the death sentence in five days.
  • 7. Pitfalls  -- Trying to put the “when” or time element first and using the exact time, when more general time will do.  Example:  At 6:15 a.m. today police found a suspect in a kidnapping of a Provo girl.  Better: Police arrested a suspect in the kidnapping of a Provo girl early Friday.
  • 8. Pitfalls  -- Writing a lead that sounds like a newspaper headline or lead in for a news broadcast (usually in present tense and without articles).  Example:  Police arrest suspect in Provo kidnapping.  Police arrested an Orem man Thursday in connection with the kidnapping of a Provo girl.
  • 9. Pitfalls  Buried leads or “so what?” leads Police Chief John Jones discussed the city’s crime problem with interested townspeople at a meeting Monday night. So what? What is the problem? There were more serious crimes reported in Provo last year than during any 12 months in the city’s history, the city’s police chief said Monday night. (26 words)
  • 10. Pitfalls  -- Stating the obvious. Don’t just say that something happened, but what was significant about what happened.  Example:  President Hinckley spoke to a large crowd Sunday and a choir performed during the annual program honoring the Mormon pioneers.  Better:  Latter-day Saints should emulate pioneer values of courage and integrity, LDS Church President Gordon B. Hinckley told hundreds gathered at a fireside Sunday night.
  • 11. Pitfalls  -- Using the name of little-know person in a lead. Delay the identification of most people, unless they are well known because of position or notoriety.  Example:  BYU student Josh Jones faces charges in connection with a hit-and-run accident that caused a pileup on I-15 yesterday.  Better:  Police arrested a 21-year-old BYU student Tuesday in connection with a hit-and-run accident that caused a pileup on I-15.
  • 12. Pitfalls  -- Using a question in the lead.  -- Using a direct quotation in the lead  -- Try one sentence first.  -- Using “you” in the lead.
  • 13. Pitfalls  Too many words  In a bold bid to pursue the Republican economic agenda and spur economic growth, President Bush plans to propose a sweeping package that would eliminate the taxes individuals pay on stock dividends, accelerate income- tax-rate cuts approved two years ago and provide $400 rebate checks for middle-class parents. (47 words) Wall Street Journal  President Bush will propose today to stimulate the economy by eliminating the tax on stock dividends and by cutting taxes this year for nearly 100 million taxpayers, at a cost of around $600 billion to the federal Treasury over 10 years. (41 words) Reuters  President Bush yesterday said the economic plan he's unveiling today - including family tax cuts and an end to taxing stock dividends - is geared to "the working citizen," and he rejected Democratic charges that it's aimed at the rich. (40 words) New York Post
  • 14. Hints for success  Start trying to think of new ways to write leads.  Example of a feature lead:  Kathy Porter, principal of Westmore Elementary in Orem, knows she must find a way to boost scores. And a mathematics program she's considering, hoping it will do the trick, has proven to be controversial.
  • 15. Hints for success  Don’t go with the first lead – rewrite  Avoid superfluous words  Write clearly and concisely  Use vivid verbs  Use colorful words  Use Subject-Verb-Object order -- S-V-O
  • 16. Compelling leads To find a lead that will work, first consider the focus or the theme of your story. Here are some questions to help you think about your theme: What one thing does the reader need to know more than any other? What would make the reader say to someone else, "Listen to this!" Is there an anecdote that captures the essence of the story?
  • 17. Compelling leads What concrete specifics reveal the significance of the story? What is the history behind the story? What are the key problems to be solved in writing this story? Source: Compiled by Dr. Sherry Ricchiardi, associate professor, Indiana University School of Journalism (Indianapolis). Adapted with permission.
  • 18. Things to remember  Attend desk meetings  Update your Route Y forwarding address  Plagiarize and you’re out  Get your hair cut!  Cover your beat even during holidays and last week  Leave early or come in late = lost points  Listen up! No laptops, ipods cell phones in class  Think art! Photo orders are part of the story prep process  Late assignments – no points  Read your story outloud  Turn off the editor  Let it rest if you can
  • 19. Time-saving tips  Check the morgue  Cast a wide net  Don’t over report  Get three balls in the air
  • 20. Unoriginal sources  Conduct your own interviews! Don’t use other sources unless deadline is in two minutes and you MUST have the quote. (Of course that doesn’t count if you’ve procrastinated for three days to call a source.) Otherwise it is lazy reporting not worthy of an A.  New York Times rule: If you didn’t conduct the interview give the source.  “It’s a lot like chicken pox,” Masters said in an e-mail.  “It is a dark day in America,” said House Minority Leader Ralph Becker, D-Salt Lake, in a news release.  “Private prisons are a great idea,” Marvin Jensen, CEO of Corrections Corporation of America, told the New York Times.  “Private prisons are a threat to the safety of corrections officers,” Jim Stimson, leader of the a correctional officers union, said in a union news release. (This was posted on a Web site, but no reference to delivery medium is necessary).  “Our stock is going through the roof,” Ralph Merit, CEO of Dot.com, was quoted on thestreet.com Web site.  “We’re at the end of our rope,” stranded miner Jack James told the Associated Press.  “It’s time to end the impasse,” Williams told the Deseret Morning News.
  • 21. More attribution  Avoid "according to" except when quoting documents. "Said" is fine in most cases.  Make sure your quotes are adequately introduced.  Bad example: Students on campus took notice of the commemoration. Miles Pomeroy, a senior from Mesa, Ariz., majoring in physiology and developmental biology, is one such student. "The anniversary means more because of the lowered flag," said Pomeroy (Pomeroy said). "I like that people volunteer to show forth their respect for what has happened."  In addition to honoring the lives of the individuals lost on Sept. 11, the vigil was meant to serve another purpose. (INTRODUCE NEW SPEAKER HERE)"My hope is that through this flag vigil and our continued example of patriotic service we may inspire others with a similar sense of national pride and determination," said Jenson.  Subject-verb in attribution -- Jenson said.  Avoid “there is”
  • 22. Ethical/process issues  Where possible ask the source to review their quotes. Please allow adequate time for review.  While it may be legal, it is not ethical to tape a conversation without first getting permission from the source  Identify who you are, that you are from the Daily Universe and you want to interview for a story for publication. Make sure they understand they are “on the record” to use their name and what is said.