Bring out the best in people and in business with coaching skills

Copyright © 2019 Jean-Francois Cousin All rights reserved www.greatness.coach
This presentation is for information purpose only and no representation or warranty is given in respect of
its accuracy, completeness or fairness. This presentation may not be copied, redistributed or published
(in whole or in part) without prior written consent of Jean-Francois Cousin
Bring out the best in people
and in business
with coaching skills
23rd November 2019
Jean-Francois Cousin, MCC

A facilitation by Jean-François Cousin,
Executive Coach, in Thailand since 1998,
with 12 years of management experience in Asia
Highest coaching credentials Successful Clients
+
• One of 7 Master Certified Coach in South Asia
accredited by the “International Coach Federation1”
• Delivered over 9,000 hours of coaching and team
facilitation since Oct ’06
• Former Managing Director of a Fortune-500
Company in Thailand (1998-2004)
1 www.coachfederation.org

Our workshop agenda
• What builds strong motivation and loyalty in employees
• Benefits of “questioning” vs “telling”
• What coaching really is
• Why and how coaching brings out the best in people
• Foundational skills for effective coaching
• Practice, skill by skill
• How coaching skills help you to negotiate successfully in business
• 10 Golden rules for effective coaching
• How to integrate coaching in management style, to boost the performance and autonomy
of subordinates
• How coaching helps the success of the world’s most admired companies
• How ICF coaching competencies will help you become a great coach and bring out the best
in people and in business

Your body-posture of confidence
• Adopt it to get your confidence (back)
and inspire others to trust you!

What is motivating people?
(consistently)

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
& Herzberg’s motivation-hygiene theory
7 needs which account for most of our behaviors
Help Others
Learning Realize our own potential
Beauty / Harmony
Self-esteem, achievement Achieve, be competent, gain status
Relationships / Belonging Love, family, friends, affection
Safety / Security (=job-security @ work) Protection, stability
Physiological needs
(= material rewards @ work)
“Hygiene”
factors
(‘must-have’)
Motivation
drivers

What impacts most on people’s emotions (+/-)
(De) Motivating factors (neuro-science)
Source: “Quiet Leadership” from David Rock
Self-esteem, achievement
Security
Autonomy / Freedom
Belonging to a group
Fairness / Justice

Remember one-time in your Life where you felt happiest,
most energized / passionate / motivated …

Helping others
What was your main Motivation-Driver
at that “time in your Life where you felt happiest
& most energized / passionate / motivated”…?
Status / Self-esteem
Certainty / Security
Autonomy / Freedom
Relationships / Belonging Fairness / Justice
Learning
Beauty / Harmony
Purpose
Watch “Motivation: simple actions with highest boost”:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZZjW4G2X68

10 simplest daily-management actions
with highest pull on employees’ motivation
• Care (and show it!)
• Listen really
• Let go (empower)
• (Help to) Go for a ‘Dream’
• Create a Learning environment
• Support & Stretch
• Offer choices
• Acknowledge Significance
• Nurture Togetherness
• Love
• Build Pride in what is achieved
Watch:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZZjW4G2X68&t=498s

Think of the best boss you ever had…
What made him/her so great?

How much of his time was
Jack Welsh coaching his people?
10% 100%
80%
50%
“Success is all about growing others”

The simplest leadership model: « 3 C »
Challenge
Coach
Build Confidence
3 C
A LEADER...
• Makes key-choices
• Provides vision
• Aligns everyone
• Creates opportunities
• Inspires and motivates
• Builds Confidence
• Challenges and
• Coaches people
Source: Paul B. Thornton, 1999

To fly higher…
help your people fly higher

How to you learn best?
… a useful initial question to coachees!

What’s the most effective
and motivating way to learn?

Neurosciences explain the effectiveness of Coaching

Telling vs. questioning: the power of not knowing (better!)
Telling puts distance between people
Questioning brings people together
Fundamentally...

Mentoring = transfer of knowledge and experience to a colleague,
to support her/him to embrace new opportunities,
succeed and develop self-confidence in her/his position.
The mentor usually belongs to the same organization as the
‘mentee’ / ‘mentoree’ / ‘protégé’
What is Mentoring?
Mentoring is usually conducted face-to-face and during a sustained period of time
(typically one year), between a person who is perceived to have greater relevant knowledge, wisdom, or experience (the
mentor) and a person who is perceived to have less (the “protégé”
or the “mentee”) or the “mentoree”).
Bozeman, Feeney, 2007

What is Coaching?
A real story from Dr. Bill Gould,
HR Director, Wall Street Institute

Coaching helps set-up an “achievement-attitude”
Fear, threat, control
Motivation, coaching
lead to
lead to
Avoidance
Achievement
focus
factors

What is Coaching? … and what it is not
Coaching, to enhance job-performance
=
helping people enhance (self)awareness, set their goals,
think-through their issues and find their own solutions,
take action, perform better at work…
and then… shift towards continuous progress
Focus on: behaviour, performance & satisfaction
Coaching is not transfer of knowledge / on-the-job training
Coaching is targeted on a particular aspect
A coach can belong to the organization or be external

What “is/is not” Coaching?
Coaching is… Coaching is not …
• Effective Performance and
Development
• One time annual discussion to
appraise performance
• Continuous improvement • Disciplinary problems or issues
• Facilitating discovery • Directing someone to do
something to meet goals
• Creating a sense of responsibility
and awareness
• Being the expert and solving
problems for the others
• Building an atmosphere of trust,
honesty and respect for the
coachee
• Addressing personal issues

Impact of support vs challenge
on subordinate’s development
Support
Challenge
High
High
Low
Low
GROWTH
Confirmation
Stagnation
Retreat

What would you like to explore today?
How is this important to you?
What would you like to walk away with?
•Adopt these questions when you start a coaching session

What does it take, to create a safe space for ourselves?

Becoming fully present

Let’s create a safer space for ourselves
• Absolute confidentiality
• Unconditional respect
• No judgment
• Partnership vs. dominance
• Create a safe space that way in
your coaching sessions

Mentee Mentor
Mentor’s posture

Coach Coachee
Most helpful coach’s posture: learner from the coachee

Rescuer
(solves, self-sacrifices)
Victim
(blames, complains)
Aggressor
(imposes,
doesn’t cooperate)
Adult observer
(questions, does not judge)

Move out of the “Victim – Aggressor – Rescuer” triangle

Child
Parent
Adult
Child
Parent
Adult
Adopt an adult-to-adult posture

•Start of a session:
• What would you like to explore today?
• How is this important to you?
• What would you like to walk away with?
•Build a safe space:
• Absolute confidentiality
• Unconditional respect
• No judgment
• Partnership vs. dominance
•Be fully present
•Exude healthy confidence
In summary:
what makes a successful (internal) coach

Coaching fundamentals:
build Awareness, Responsibility + help to take Actions
Enhance
AWARENESS
Encourage
RESPONSIBILITY
for
Progress
Ensure
ACTION
are taken

Coaching subordinates increases their
▪ Status
▪ Certainty
▪ Autonomy
▪ Relatedness (relationship)
▪ Fairness
… and makes them THINK!
Neuroscience now explains the effectiveness of Coaching
and its motivating impact on coachees

What Coaching can do for you as a manager:
enhance autonomy of your subordinates
Autonomy
Delegate more
Focus on priorities
Get more loyalty
WIN-WIN
Set goals Coach

Silence… is your Friend. Let it do the heavy work!
It enhances coachee’s accountability

Ask for more Thinking
• ‘Tell me more’
• ‘What else?’
• ‘Anything else?’

Who really listens to you? How?

1. Keep silent -3 seconds minimum- after the speaker finishes his/her sentence,
and never interrupt!
2. Focus totally (on eyes, tone, words, body-language, emotions) & match/mirror
3. Stay neutral (do not express your views)
4. Ask clarifying, open-ended questions (e.g. “tell me more… Anything else?...”)
5. Paraphrase (= repeat what was said with your own words, to prove you listen)
Basics of ‘facilitative’ listening
Watch: video of a coaching session with facilitative listening
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8QaakmZK2M&feature=related

Exercise with your neighbor / ‘facilitative’ listening
Ask your neighbor:
“how do you feel when someone listens to you very well?”
… and practice facilitative listening ☺

Facilitative listening:
• improves your working relationships
• brings more insight to conversations
• helps people build-up clarity in their thinking
• role-models respect
• generates ownership for ideas, therefore motivation
DO
listen for emotions
DON’T
judge
‘Facilitative’ listening

‘Levels of thinking’

Use ‘levels of thinking’ / “hierarchy of ideas”
Explore the issue from different levels of thinking
“Chunking up”
examples of up-lifting questions:
• What is this an example of?
• For what purpose…?
• What is your intention?
• Why?
“Chunking down”
examples of specific questions:
• What are examples of this?
• What specifically…?
• How exactly…?

Coaching is also coming-up with the right questions!
%
10 %
20 %
30 %
50 %
Read Hear See See &
hear
What we
remember…
… from
what we …
80 %
Say
90 %
Say
& do

Do you want to have
fun?

Can we experiment
together?

What is your mindset now?

How can you adjust your mindset
to grow even more today?

How much thinking did it take?
1. Do you want to have
fun?
2. Can we experiment
together?
3. What’s your name?
4. How are you feeling
today?
5. Why are you here?
6. Who are you?
7. What is your mindset
now?

Listening at deep level
Listen totally
(eyes, tone, words choice, body-language, emotions, what is not said)

Listening at deep level

A B
What is the best* question
someone ever asked you?
1
Answers ☺
2
Write the question
on a flipchart
What impact did it
have on your life?
How did it transform
you, as a person?
4
3
6
5
* = question that
lead to new thinking
and new insight

Let’s dissect…
anatomy of
your powerful
questions
Let’s play and
make questions
more powerful!
Let’s play and make questions more powerful!

More Powerful
Less Powerful
From less to more powerful questions…
WHY?
HOW?
WHAT?
WHO, WHEN, WHERE?
WHICH?
CLOSED QUESTIONS
(=answer with 1 word)
YES/NO

More Powerful
Less Powerful
WHY,
HOW,
WHAT,
WHO,WHEN, WHERE,
WHICH, YES/NO QUESTIONS
• What is it about our working
relationship that you find most
satisfying?
• Why has our working relationship
has had its ups and downs?
• Are you satisfied with our working
relationship?
• When have you been most
satisfied with our working
relationship?
From less to more powerful questions…

Examples of (more or less) powerful questions
(list to be adjusted / expanded)
• What’s important to you about (your specific situation) and why do you care?
• What draws you/us to this question?
• What is your intention here?
• What’s the deeper purpose (the big “why”) that is really worthy of your best effort?
• What opportunities can you see in (your specific situation)?
• What do you know so far/still need to learn about (your specific situation)?
• What are the dilemmas/opportunities in (your specific situation)?
• What assumptions do we need to test or challenge here in thinking about (your
specific situation)?
• What would someone who had a very different set of beliefs than we do say about
(your specific situation)?
• …

Examples of (more or less) powerful questions
(list to be adjusted / expanded)
• What is the purpose? What is at stake? What is the bigger picture?
• What are the specific expectations you have from me / my team?
• What resources are available? What help will you provide?
• Which risks / threats / constraints can impact the project?
• What help can you bring to others? What support are you committing to deliver?
• What can you change in your behavior, so others adjust theirs?
• Who are you being that others react to what you do the way they do?
• What are the most important deliverables, in order of priority?
• What realistic dead-lines can we fix for each deliverables?
• How will we hold each other accountable for delivery?
• …

• ‘Coachee’ chooses one difficult friend/family member to relate with
• ‘Coachee’ tells the coach ‘I’d like to reflect and find out
how I could relate with ‘(name)’ better’
• ‘Coach’ starts to listen and question the coachee
Let’s coach each other

Further-development needs for my coaching skills
“Which coaching skills do I most need to develop in my role
as a manager / father / mother / friend…?”
Coaching skills
Priority for
improvement

An effective framework for Coaching: A.G.O2.W.A.L.
G
Goal-setting
W
Way-forward
A
Actions!
L
Lessons learnt
A
Awareness
O2
Obstacles &
Opportunities

10 Golden Rules for a Coach
2
Question, don’t tell, don’t judge
4
Listen & use Silence
5
6 Challenge, to get Best Ideas
1 Build Trust, Ensure Confidentiality
3
Establish Awareness
8
9
10
7 Request Actions
Follow-up on Actions
Hold Coachee Accountable
Motivate for Change
Anchor Lessons Learnt

How to integrate coaching in your management-style, to
boost the performance and autonomy of your colleagues?

Ask coaching-style questions
in 1-on-1 business-review meetings
• Can you please summarize what’s going on?
• What are your priorities at the moment?
• What is going well?
• What do you want to improve?
• How can I help you?
• What feedback do you have for me?
Executive summary
Priorities
Lessons from successes
Problem solving
Support needed
Other opportunities
EXAMPLE
Source: Marshall Goldsmith ‘What got you here won’t get you there’

1. Ask a subordinate to list important tasks/objectives he/she has to work on
2. Ask him/her to rate his/her ability to deliver (on a scale from = very poor, to =excellent)
3. Ask him/her to rate his/her motivation to deliver (on a scale from =very low, to =very strong
4. Discuss what tasks/objectives it makes best sense to focus coaching on
(for example: high ability + low motivation)
A simple tool to develop your people in 1-on-1 meetings
1
2
3
4
5
Tasks / Objectives
Task / objective 1
Task / objective 2
Task / objective 3
Task / objective 4
Task / objective 5
Ability Motivation

 
  
  
  
  
 

 
  
Ability
Motivation
     






1
2
3
3
5
NB: a possible refinement of this tool: dimension the diameter of tasks/objectives on the chart in proportion to their importance

How coaching helps you
negotiate successfully in business?

How do you influence senior people?

• Build Trust with Authenticity and Listening
• Understand beliefs, needs, interests and fears
(through facilitative listening & powerful questioning)
• Generate a desire for change, through asking (not telling)
• Co-create solutions (as in a coaching session)
• Reach Clear Agreement (as in a coaching session)
• Follow through (as in coaching sessions)
Influencing skills

How ICF Coaching Competencies will help you become a great coach
and bring out the best in people and in business
https://coachfederation.org/app/uploads/2017/12/CoreCompetencies.pdf

Story-telling together
‘Something important I learnt today is…’
‘Yes, and…’
‘Yes, and…’
Go 2 rounds!

Jean-Francois Cousin, MCC
Hanoi, 23rd November 2019
Why and how Coaching boosts the success of
tech companies the Silicon Valley’s

Group-sharing: what did you learn?
What did you find the most interesting / important?

Greatness Leadership Coaching
Jean-Francois Cousin
@JF_Cousin
Website: www.greatness.coach

Greatness
Leadership
Coaching

Resource
(click on picture for access)
http://www.greatness.coach/book
On Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Game-Changers-Circus-Greatness-
Organizations/dp/981095655X/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1446086545&sr=1-1

http://www.greatness.coach/book

Resource
(click on picture for a preview)
Available on Amazon (paperback and ebook)

Bring out the best in people and in business with coaching skills

Recommended

Recommended

More Related Content

Similar to Bring out the best in people and in business with coaching skills

Similar to Bring out the best in people and in business with coaching skills (20)

More from Greatness Coaching

More from Greatness Coaching (20)

Recently uploaded

Recently uploaded (20)

Bring out the best in people and in business with coaching skills