Anger, How to manage anger? workplace anger.
you must read. If you really wanted to manage your anger. you need to read it and get it clearly.....................
Basic Civil Engineering first year Notes- Chapter 4 Building.pptx
Anger.... A slow poison
1. ANGER... A SLOW POISON
ANGER… When we heard this word, a typical killer image comes to our mind every
time. When we get angry, the heart rate, arterial tension and testosterone production
increases, adrenaline increases, cortisol (the stress hormone) decreases, and the left
hemisphere of the brain become more stimulated. We feel like energize at that
moment but just after it we feel blank. Feel like drained, exhausted and stressed. We
take this as an automated process and we do not have control over it. We kept this in
our believe system as it is a situation driven and we cannot control the situations. This
is a wrong believe and we can change it any time if we really want.
I remember when I was a kid, I often get anger and feel like energize at that moment,
just after this, I feel like my body is shivering, exhausted and weakness. Many of us
may feel in same way. Here is the science behind this, “When we get angry, we get
excited due to increase of adrenaline (a hormone secreted by the medulla of the
adrenal glands) and it released to bloodstream which causes an increase in heart
rate, muscle strength, blood pressure, and sugar metabolism”. For some people it is
satisfying because anger may pull them out of a blue funk temporarily and get them
moving. The Adrenalin that is produced by anger can become addictive. Deposits of
Adrenalin causes, Extreme fatigue, Weight loss and decreased appetite, Darkening of
your skin (hyper-pigmentation), Low blood pressure, even fainting, Salt craving, Low
blood sugar (hypoglycemia), Nausea, diarrhea or vomiting, Abdominal pain, Muscle
or joint pains, Irritability, Depression. It has been found that 41% of heart attack is due
to anger. People who express anger outwardly usually hook up with "Anger Inners."
People who turn their anger inward suppress their anger, which results in anxiety, poor
self-esteem, bitterness and depression.
2. Role of Anger in Corporates?
We may have faced this kind of situation in our corporate life while dealing with
difficult people. We may have seen people shouting at their subordinates. These
people may not intentionally want to do it but flow of anger comes in & they express it
in a bad way. As a result they feel exhausted and stress. I asked this to one of
employee who is in a managerial position; I got answer as: If you will not
shout/express anger, your job will not be getting done. Again I asked, have you ever
tried to get your work done politely? Off-course answer is indirectly NO. When we
express anger towards someone, we may get the work done but it blocks the mind of
counterpart and he/she cannot think creatively. It will create hindrance to enjoy the
work. Job will be a burden for them. Ultimately it will create stress and depression. The
other part is that person will start avoiding you. He/she may comply with you but
respect would be a missing link rather it will turned into fear. Respect will only come
when love is there. Let’s dissect in this way: If you express anger towards 10 people a
day, you have generated Adrenalin 10 times. Again you will get negative vibrations
from these 10 people that mean you have generated 20 times Adrenalin a day by
expressing anger to 10 people. We cannot visualize it but can realize it. This is the one
of the reason for negativity in corporate culture.
How to control anger?
The main part is, we do not have to suppress anger neither to express it. In both these
cases, it harms us by physically or psychologically. Then question arise “what to do
with this anger?” We have to go to the root of anger. We have to handle situations
rather than anger. How to manage it-let’s get into the deeper.
Take an example: If someone come to you and shouts at you in front of everyone. You
may get angry & feel like, “why he/she is creating a scene for a small reason”. But
don’t react. This may be a hurricane for him/her. Listen to the whole story, keep
yourself calm. First thing you have to do is (Step-1) Keep yourself calm and don’t
react, then (Step-2)Detaching from the situation, go back a step, feel like he/she is not
shouting at you and someone else is there. (Step-3) Understanding the situation by
putting yourself in his/her shoes. Get the reason behind the anger. (Step-4) Realize the
situation and (Step-5) then reply but don’t react. It is correlated to conflict
management.
It seems to be very difficult. How can we do this entire thing, when someone is
shouting at us? Only one answer is there by keeping silence. It has a great power.
Initially it would be little difficult to keep calm but remember, you have to keep calm
when someone is shouting at you.
I remembered a story and will share with you all, trust me you will like it…
In a small village, one couple was there. Very often they argue with each other, even
in a small matter. They were not happy with their life. They were really fed off with their
life and were not finding any other options. They don’t want it intentionally. But they
feel like it happens, they don’t have any control over it. The lady was trying to stop it
3. but was not succeed. Few months later…. The lady went to meet a “Pundit” and
discussed the whole story. The pundit gave some water in a copper vessel and said
“this is enchanted water, when your husband will shout at you, take some water and
keep it in your mouth, don’t drink. - do it for a week and comeback”. - Just like a
Doctor… take it for a week and comeback. The lady left and did the same for a week.
She found the result as she wanted. After a week she came back and started praising
the Pundit. On reply Pundit said…. “I have not done anything; it was you who did it.
How…? Lady replied. There was nothing like enchanted water, as you have believe in
the water, you got result. - believe in yourself and you will get result”. Then the lady
realized that, on keeping water in her mouth, she kept herself silent at the time of
argument. Hence she got better result.
We all may know this story since our childhood. This may seems to be funny but the
intention was clear…… SILENT has a great power. Try it once and trust me you will
love it.
If you have any questions on this article… write on : askme@jagabandhujena.ga
Thank you.