The “Course Topics” series from Manage Train Learn and Slide Topics is a collection of over 4000 slides that will help you master a wide range of management and personal development skills. The 202 PowerPoints in this series offer you a complete and in-depth study of each topic. This presentation is on "What Is Assertiveness?".

1. 1
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
ASSERTIVENESS
What is Assertiveness?

2. 2
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
The Course Topics series from Manage Train Learn is a large collection of topics that will help you as a learner
to quickly and easily master a range of skills in your everyday working life and life outside work. If you are a
trainer, they are perfect for adding to your classroom courses and online learning plans.
COURSE TOPICS FROM MTL
The written content in this Slide Topic belongs exclusively to Manage Train Learn and may only be reprinted
either by attribution to Manage Train Learn or with the express written permission of Manage Train Learn.
They are designed as a series of numbered
slides. As with all programmes on Slide
Topics, these slides are fully editable and
can be used in your own programmes,
royalty-free. Your only limitation is that
you may not re-publish or sell these slides
as your own.
Copyright Manage Train Learn 2020
onwards.
Attribution: All images are from sources
which do not require attribution and may
be used for commercial uses. Sources
include pixabay, unsplash, and freepik.
These images may also be those which are
in the public domain, out of copyright, for
fair use, or allowed under a Creative
Commons license.

3. 3
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
ARE YOU READY?
OK, LET’S START!

4. 4
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
INTRODUCTION
In our relationships with others, we all have it in us to
behave in ways which are either predominantly aggressive
or passive. These tendencies carry with them heavy
burdens: aggression leads to conflict and revenge by others;
passivity leads to low self-esteem and thoughts of "what-
might-have-been". Learning how to be assertive is the route
back to whole and healthy relationships. It builds mutual
respect between people, seeks win-win outcomes to
problems and develops self-confidence. It is one of the keys
to happy and productive individuals and teams.

5. 5
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
DEFINING ASSERTIVENESS
One researcher has discovered that there are more than
250 separate ways to define aggression, assertion and non-
assertion.
These range from the literal dictionary definitions to the
popular understandings of the words; from the definitions
of the words as modes of behaviour to their definitions as
states of mind.
The Concise Oxford Dictionary has the following definitions
for words under "assert"...
• "assert": declare or state clearly; insist on one's rights or
opinions; demand recognition; vindicate a claim
• "assertive": forthright; positive; dogmatic
• "self-assertion": the aggressive promotion of oneself.

6. 6
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
WHY BE ASSERTIVE?
The aims of Assertiveness in behaviour, thought and feeling
are always positive.
1. At a personal level, one of the aims of Assertiveness
may be to simply feel good about how we relate to
others.
2. At a team level, one of the aims of Assertiveness may
be to improve the way the team communicates with
each other and with outsiders.
3. At an organisational level, one of the aims of
Assertiveness may be to increase the contributions
people make with the result that they feel more
involved and committed to the enterprise.

7. 7
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
THE BENEFITS
Assertiveness can be defined by looking at how people
benefit when assertiveness is used in personal and
workplace relationships.
These benefits are that...
1. fear is eliminated
2. people make more contributions
3. communication is more honest
4. less time is spent ironing out disputes (and trying to find
out who said what to whom, when and how, and did
they mean it anyway)
5. people get on better with each other
6. work is focused on problems not personality differences
7. people know what's expected of them.
In organisational life, Assertiveness changes the nature of
authoritarian management, breaks down fiefdoms and
empires, and enables people to make more and better
contributions to how work is done.

8. 8
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
REPLACING FEAR
One of the key benefits of Assertiveness is that it helps you
eliminate the fear and stress which still today are present in
many of our life and work relationships, be they demanding
bosses, angry customers, or unhelpful colleagues.
Fear and stress-based relationships create different forms of
flight-fight reactions in us. These can take the form of
avoiding people, giving in to them, battling them, bullying
them, or manipulating them. All these routes lead to
unease, disease, and ultimate exhaustion.
With Assertiveness skills, you learn that fear doesn't have to
exist in any relationship you choose to have, whatever the
other person wants. Assertiveness gives you back personal
control that allows you to act rather than react and to see
everyone else the way you see yourself. With love and
respect.

9. 9
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
THE OUTCOMES
Compared to other modes of working, Assertiveness is like
removing the shackles from the restrictions placed on the
way we operate.
Some of the consequences of assertive working are...
1. blame and fear are replaced by trust
2. people feel good about themselves
3. life becomes a process of working at things rather than
having neat and easy answers
4. your confidence increases as you trust your own views
5. you respect others more by listening to them
6. you become more aware of how you and others behave
7. you become involved in situations but are also able to
stand back and be detached.

10. 10
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
BUILDING YOUR SELF-ESTEEM
A high level of self-esteem has now become an essential
requirement of modern business life.
Unlike the past models of business life, where people at
work were required to know their place and look up to
those above and down on those below, today's businesses
require co-operation, equality, and respect for diversity.
One of the skills that takes you there is self-esteem, the
appreciation of your own worth and importance. And
Assertiveness is one of the daily habits that will produce
self-esteem.
"High self-esteem workers making independent decisions,
taking risks, vigorously pursuing new ideas and acting on
their own initiative are exactly the employees needed for
the 21st century." (BBC Health)

11. 11
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
THE CONFIDENCE LANE
Assertiveness and confidence are inextricably linked
together.
For example, when you know that you have a right to be in
your place in the world, to occupy the space you are in, and
the right to express what you want, you are both thinking
and behaving assertively and confidently.
Imagine a 3-lane highway, labelled respectively "Weakness",
"Confidence", and "Dominance". When you drive along the
inside lane of letting others walk all over you, you know
you're in the slow lane of Weakness and it's time to step up
into a better lane. When you find yourself driving along the
outside lane of overtaking everyone else with your power,
you know you're in the high-speed lane of Dominance and
it's time to step down. Use your dashboard gauge of
awareness and feedback to stay in the middle lane of
Confidence and your journey will be successful for both you
and others.

12. 12
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
DIMENSIONS
One of the reasons why a simple definition of assertiveness
is elusive is that assertiveness works on many levels. It is
multi-dimensional.
1. it is a way to express ourselves; it is a way of projecting
thoughts, opinions, needs, wants, values and rights; it is
a way of behaving that is both "here and now" and
developmental.
2. it avoids dogmatic certainties about ourselves and
others
3. it replaces "either/or", "black or white", "win/lose",
"for-us-or-against-us" thinking with "both/and", "black
and white", "win-win" thinking
4. it encourages diversity of opinion
5. it is "we may be right" rather than "we are right"
6. it is the style of constructive leadership, not destroy-
the-opposition leadership
7. it is about life as process, not life as fixed.

13. 13
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
HISTORICAL ORIGINS
"Assertiveness" in its modern meaning is closely linked to its
recent historical origins.
Assertiveness and in particular assertiveness training was
first used as a non-aggressive way to deal with Civil Rights
abuses in America in the 1960’s.
Since then it has been successfully used by other minority or
disadvantaged groups such as women's groups and minority
groups as a way to improve self-esteem and
communication.
More recently, Assertiveness and assertiveness training
have been recognised for the many advantages they bring to
personal relationships, social situations and the workplace.
The applications of Assertiveness are transferrable across a
range of life experiences.

14. 14
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
ASSERTIVE SKILLS
Assertiveness is a skill that leads to changes in how we
relate to others and how we see ourselves.
Because of this, Assertiveness is regularly used in the
following kinds of skill training...
1. communications, eg in listening to others, expressing
ourselves and giving feedback
2. managing others, eg coaching and instructing
3. presentations, eg dealing with a difficult audience
4. interviewing, eg staying in control of the interview
5. managing change, eg selling change to others
6. managing stress, eg limiting workloads by saying No
7. leadership, eg taking hard decisions
8. appraisal, eg facing up to an individual's under-
performance
9. self-development, eg asking for help from others
10. counselling, eg challenging people to face issues
11. negotiation, eg resisting emotional blackmail.

15. 15
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
THE ASSERTIVE JOURNEY
In her book, "Be Assertive", Beverley Hare describes the
journey she made from a time when she felt as if she had
lost touch with her own identity to a time 11 years later
when she believed she had re-gained it.
This was her journey...
1. from low self-esteem to improved self-esteem
2. from little confidence to improved confidence
3. from believing she was unintelligent to believing she
was intelligent
4. from believing she was unattractive to believing she was
attractive
5. from dependence to independence
6. from feeling passive to feeling active
7. from predominantly non-assertive to predominantly
assertive behaviour
8. from obsessive dependent relationships to
interdependent relationships
9. from being sensitive to criticism to handling criticism
well

16. 16
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
PERSONAL EXPRESSION
The authors Ken and Kate Back, use a definition of
Assertiveness that emphasises its value as a means of
personal expression and communication.
"Assertiveness is a way of expressing your needs, wants,
opinions, feelings and beliefs (and rights) in direct, honest
and appropriate ways.“
Other writers emphasise the behavioural basis of
Assertiveness: "Assertiveness is simply the behaviour based
on valuing yourself enough to insist on getting what you
want and need by using fair and reasonable means.“
Put simply, Assertiveness = Confidence.

17. 17
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
THE THREE MODES
A.J.Lange and P.Jakubowski, in their book "Responsible
Assertive Behaviour" provide a definition of Assertiveness in
which it is compared to aggression and non-assertion.
1. Non-assertion is violating one's own rights by failing to
express honest feelings, thoughts and beliefs and
consequently allowing others to violate oneself.
2. Aggression is directly standing up for personal rights and
expressing thoughts, feelings and beliefs in a way which is
often dishonest, usually inappropriate and always violates
the rights of the other person.
3. Assertiveness is standing up for personal rights and
expressing thoughts, feelings and beliefs in direct, honest
and appropriate ways which do not violate another person's
rights.

18. 18
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR
Aggressive behaviour means...
1. getting your own way, no matter what
2. winning at all costs
3. being loud, abusive, controlling, manipulative,
intimidating, violent, sarcastic
4. using put-downs of others
5. using any trick or game to show others are weaker than
you.
While in many parts of our society the aggressive type is
admired for their strength, the aggressive person is basically
a coward at heart. Their behaviour towards others is likely
to create a resentment-revenge cycle which will re-bound
on them one day.

19. 19
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
NON-ASSERTION
Non-assertive or passive behaviour means...
1. keeping quiet for fear of upsetting others
2. avoiding conflict at any cost
3. putting others' needs ahead of your own
4. being vague about your own needs
5. excessive apologising
6. pretending to be indecisive as a way of taking a different
stand
7. bottling things up.
The person who relies on passive behaviour does so in the
hope that they will be safe and protected by others. There is
every likelihood that others will despise their weakness and
soon come to lose respect for them. The passive person may
become bitter in later life for lost opportunities.

20. 20
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
ASSERTIVE BEHAVIOUR
Assertive behaviour means...
1. being open, honest and vulnerable
2. standing up for yourself
3. refusing to be intimidated
4. finding win-win solutions to conflict
5. being equal with others while retaining your uniqueness
6. listening to others
7. showing understanding.
While on the surface an assertive lifestyle seems to carry
with it many dangers - the possibility that others will knock
you down in flames for being so open and honest - it is the
only route to personal respect and respect for others.

21. 21
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
WHAT ASSERTIVENESS IS NOT
In learning to be more confident and assertive, many people
overdo the effect and slip into aggressively-expressed
assertions. Equally, many people who aim to be assertive,
step back from conflict in case they infringe other people’s
rights.
Assertiveness is not about dominating, resisting, or feeling
forced to yield to others. It is never about becoming
emotional and angry. Nor is it about forcing your point of
view onto other people.
What assertiveness does aim to do is to emphasise the
value of clear, calm, frank and often minimal communication
as a means of establishing relationships in which everyone
knows where they stand and no-one feels ill-used.

22. 22
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
PROCESS, NOT FINALITY
There is little call for Assertiveness in stable environments
where a ruling elite governs through rules and conformity.
Such environments create a view of life as fixed and final. In
change environments, however, life is seen as process.
In such environments,...
1. life is not static but evolving
2. listening is a predominant social skill
3. the quality of relationships matters more than status
4. learning is an ongoing requirement for survival
5. there is a recognition that everyone is important in the
human enterprise
6. life is seen as paradoxical, complex and diverse
7. "both...and" replaces "either...or"
8. there are no certainties, just possibilities
9. being in process is more important than completing the
process
10. assertiveness is a prime social skill.

23. 23
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
THAT’S
IT!
WELL DONE!

24. 24
|
What Is Assertiveness?
Assertiveness
MTL Course Topics
THANK YOU
This has been a Slide Topic from Manage Train Learn