How are our successes gauged? Typically it's by title, the amount we make, or even the size of the projects. This post is to keep our minds focused on what's important and that our success really comes from the relationships we build and what they will eventually yield in the future.

1. 7/9/2014 Gauging Your Success | The Business of Relationships
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I
Gauging Your Success
do not gauge my success by the amount on
my paycheck, my title, or even the size of a
project. I gauge success by the quality,
more than the quantity of, relationships I build.
I want people to remember the impact I had on
their lives, both in the workplace and out.
Alternatively, I want to feel the impact that
others have on me. I want to develop deep
relationships that balance give and take – to
foster a mutual understanding that facilitates the
need for both parties to work with one another
again in the future. I’m noticing a shift in
business that supports this mindset. Could it be
that the younger generation has more passion for
personal connections, regardless of salary, rather
than cushy corner offices with a view? It could
just be me, but it seems that our society as a
whole is putting more of an emphasis on the
quality of work relationships (and also the
workplace environment) above titles and
paychecks. I think it’s exciting and necessary.

2. 7/9/2014 Gauging Your Success | The Business of Relationships
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And I think it works. As a child of baby boomers,
I can tell you their mentality at prime working
age was to get a solid job and stick it out,
regardless if it was a healthy situation. They
perfected the 9­5 grind in an effort to put food on
the table. This was the benchmark for success: a
well­fed and safe familial environment. Those
times were a bit harder then and the mentality
was work until your heart gave out. Obviously,
providing for our families is still a main priority,
but we’re now realizing the deeper effects of
vocational happiness, and how it has the
potential to shape and modify everything else in
our lives. (Teaser: post to come about the
psychological effects of good work relationships.)
Think of the positive connections you make in
the workplace as the start of a domino effect for
the rest of your life. No matter what kind of day I
have at work, I’m going to bring that same
attitude, whether that’s positive or negative, back
to my wife and children. We as leaders have the
power to make sure that our employees go home
in a great mood, even though overcoming that
challenge can be increasingly difficult. For
example, we can do this by imposing short,
positive pep talks to end out the day. (Granted,
people respond to praise in different ways, so you
need to identify what works best for you and your
employees.) What is my overarching advice you
might ask? Find out what your employees need

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to feel accomplished, and send them home with a
sense of pride in not only themselves but also in
what they do for a living. This should not be
downplayed. I know I’ve had my fair share of
days with animosity at work, and I inadvertently
took it out on my wife with snide remarks upon
returning home. I have since apologized and
been forgiven, but the damage is done.
Alternatively, if I get home smiling ear­to­ear due
to a great workday, it makes home life that much
better for all of us. As someone now in a
leadership position, I want to make sure I’m
sending my employees home every day with that
same ear­to­ear smile as often as I possibly can.
Believe it or not, we as leaders control more than
just the end result of our projects or research.
We have the responsibility…yes, the
responsibility… to alter the personal health of
our employees for the better by reducing their
stress and reminding them that they are valued.
Make them feel successful and you too will feel
the same success as a leader. How do you gauge
your success? What is it that would make you
realize you’re a great leader?