Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition II SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE AND SCORING Logan Stevens Sophia Pathways English Composition II December 20, 2019 Source Evaluation on “Salmon: Their Fight for Survival” by Anthony Netboy In my research paper I am arguing that there is a dire need for extra protection of wild salmon and steelhead on the west coast; particularly in Washington, Oregon, and northern California, where once very large wild fish stocks are dwindling near extinction. Hatcheries have helped slow the decline of these fisheries, but are not a substitute for truly wild fish. In my research I came across a book entitled “Salmon: Their Fight for Survival” by Anthony Netboy. I found this book to be entertaining in many aspects, but not very helpful as a research source. Netboy’s book has several problems with it; the first of which being its broadness. I am looking for information about fisheries of the pacific coast. This book gives information on “[s]almon catches in Norway” (Netboy 152) and “[s]almon in Great Britain” (45) as well as some tidbits about pacific salmon catches, and some information about dams on the Columbia River, however it was mostly things that were not backed up by another source. Another problem I saw in this source is some of the way it was worded made it feel Comment [1]: This is a very interesting Thesis statement! It takes a clear stance on a debatable issue. Well done! Comment [2]: See note below on organization. Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition II SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE AND SCORING biased and opinionated rather than presenting straight hard facts. For example; in one section they are talking about the decline of the California salmon fisheries. The language the author uses seems biased in my eyes. I agree with his opinion, but I’m not looking for an opinion, I’m looking for facts. The fate of California’s salmon mirrors the state’s use and misuse of many of its natural resources. In the last half of the century a serene land of infinitely varied landscapes… was invaded by hordes of people from the ends of America and abroad seeking riches...In the process rivers and watersheds were turned topsy- turvy, farmlands were bulldozed and covered with towns, cities, and Cyclopean highways…Like other forms of aquatic life, many of the salmon became victims of this unparalleled destruction. (Netboy 235) The use of several words and phrases, such as “hordes” and “this unparalleled destruction” say to me that he is using his own opinion and not fact, thereby making the source somewhat biased, and not very useful. Also, in some of this work, there are tables, showing salmon catches in different regions. I noticed that the numbers are not matching up with some of my other research. I have records of fish counts from the Bonnevelle Dam on the Columbia River. According to the book there were 384,780 .

1. Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English
Composition II
SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE ANDSCORING
Logan Stevens
Sophia Pathways
English Composition II
December 20, 2019
Source Evaluation on “Salmon: Their Fight for Survival” by
Anthony Netboy
In my research paper I am arguing that there is a dire need for
extra protection of wild
salmon and steelhead on the west coast; particularly in
Washington, Oregon, and northern
California, where once very large wild fish stocks are dwindling
near extinction. Hatcheries have
helped slow the decline of these fisheries, but are not a
substitute for truly wild fish. In my

2. research I came across a book entitled “Salmon: Their Fight for
Survival” by Anthony Netboy. I
found this book to be entertaining in many aspects, but not very
helpful as a research source.
Netboy’s book has several problems with it; the first of which
being its broadness. I am
looking for information about fisheries of the pacific coast. This
book gives information on
“[s]almon catches in Norway” (Netboy 152) and “[s]almon in
Great Britain” (45) as well as
some tidbits about pacific salmon catches, and some
information about dams on the Columbia
River, however it was mostly things that were not backed up by
another source.
Another problem I saw in this source is some of the way it was
worded made it feel
Comment [1]: This is a very interesting Thesis
statement! It takes a clear stance on a debatable issue.
Well done!
Comment [2]: See note below on organization.
Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English
Composition II

3. SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE ANDSCORING
biased and opinionated rather than presenting straight hard
facts. For example; in one section
they are talking about the decline of the California salmon
fisheries. The language the author
uses seems biased in my eyes. I agree with his opinion, but I’m
not looking for an opinion, I’m
looking for facts.
The fate of California’s salmon mirrors the state’s use and
misuse of many of its
natural resources. In the last half of the century a serene land of
infinitely varied
landscapes… was invaded by hordes of people from the ends of
America and
abroad seeking riches...In the process rivers and watersheds
were turned topsy-
turvy, farmlands were bulldozed and covered with towns, cities,
and Cyclopean
highways…Like other forms of aquatic life, many of the salmon
became victims
of this unparalleled destruction. (Netboy 235)
The use of several words and phrases, such as “hordes” and

4. “this unparalleled destruction” say to
me that he is using his own opinion and not fact, thereby
making the source somewhat biased,
and not very useful.
Also, in some of this work, there are tables, showing salmon
catches in different regions.
I noticed that the numbers are not matching up with some of my
other research. I have records of
fish counts from the Bonnevelle Dam on the Columbia River.
According to the book there were
384,780 chinook salmon that passed through Bonnevelle Dam in
1970 (Netboy 548). However
according to the records kept on the Columbia Basin Fisheires,
only 314,032 chinook salmon
were counted. This may seem a small difference to some but
when one thinks of all the rivers
and tributaries on the Columbia it adds up rather fast. 70,000
fish can be an entire river’s worth
of fish for a season. This discrepancy only goes to show this as
an unreliable source.
Comment [3]: Excellent point!
Comment [4]: This is a good point. In order to be truly
helpful, a source should be comprised of facts trends.
When there is bias, it can skew the information that is

5. being presented.
Comment [5]: The organization of your paper could
have been enhanced if this paragraph was placed after
your second paragraph. That one ended with the
statement that not all of the facts in the book were
backed up another source. Could have been a good
lead-in!
Comment [6]: Good use of another source to check
validity!
Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English
Composition II
SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE ANDSCORING
The final problem with this source I found is the date of
publication. It was originally
published in 1974 by Houghton Mifflin. This source is over 30
years old. There are many more
modern sources that have updated and more accurate
information, along with research to back it
up. For example the book “[t]he Behavior and Ecology of
Pacific Salmon and Trout” by Thomas
P. Quinn has many tables and years worth of research gathered
by the author himself and

6. compared with other research that has been conducted. It was
published in 2005, giving it a bit
more relevance due to modern scientific research.
In conclusion, I have deemed this source as unhelpful and
unreliable. An effective source
should be relevant, recent, backed by research, and factual. This
source has flaws with all four of
those things, not to mention with the vast amount of information
about specific parts of the globe
that I am not arguing for in my argumentative essay. Although
it contains some information that
might help build background information on my topic, it will
not be useful to me with my thesis
statement in mind.
Comment [7]: Good concluding paragraph! Nice
summary of your points from above.
Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English
Composition II
SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE ANDSCORING

7. Works Cited
1. Columbia Basin Fisheries and Tribes. “Annual
Adult Salmon Totals” (04/22/2008): web
(02/10/2010).
<http://www.fpc.org/adultsalmon/adultqueries/Adult_Annual_T
otals_Query_Results.asp>.
2. Netboy, Anthony. “The Salmon: Their Fight
for Survival” Houghton Mifflin. (1974): 45, 152,
235, 548.
Print.
Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English
Composition II
SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE ANDSCORING
Reflection Questions:
1. What types of questions did you ask yourself when evaluating
the credibility and
usefulness of your source?
I’ve learned that a good source to use for accurate research
should be recent, reliable, and
factual. Those were the main things that I considered
throughout my analysis of the
source, so I asked myself when the source was published,
whether the author showed any
bias, and whether the author adequately cited any factual
information presented.

8. 2. How do you feel this evaluation practice will help you as you
continue to move
through the research process?
By making sure all of my sources are reliable, recent, and
factual, I am able to strengthen
my argument on this topic and back it up with factual evidence.
An argument will be easy
to debunk if it doesn’t have the data and facts to support it.
Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English
Composition II
SAMPLE TOUCHSTONE ANDSCORING
Source Evaluation Essay Rubric and Feedback
Rubric
Category
Feedback Score
(acceptable, needs
improvement etc.)
Thesis You have a great thesis here. It takes a clear
stance on the issue and you are very clear about
why. I would try and work it in a bit more
seamlessly, instead of starting with it right off the
bat.
9/10
Proficient

9. Evidence and
Analysis
You do an outstanding job of including points
from the source that adequately support your
analysis. I can see how you’ve done your
research.
20/20
Proficient
Organization A few elements of your organization could be
tweaked to enhance the flow, but not to the point
where it is hard to follow.
3/5
Proficient
Style You have done a great job ensuring there are no
major sentence-level errors.
5/5
Proficient
Conventions
You have consistently used correct grammar and
punctuation throughout your essay.
5/5

10. Proficient
Reflection You have provided thoughtful responses to the
reflection questions. Well done.
5/5
Proficient
Overall Score and Feedback: 47/50
I thinkyou really know your stuff when it
comes to this topic! It shows throughout
your analysis
of the source you chose. I thinkyou do a bit
more brainstorming when you are putting your
essays together in the future. The organization of
your information can take a good paper and
make it a greatpaper.
Coronavirus prompts Manchester to rethink the merger between
Memorial High and Manchester School of Technology
Name ：Aubrey Patrick
As a student, I have seen and experienced a lot of the struggles
the Coronavirus pandemic has brought onto schooling. Although
this pandemic has been seen to have large negative effect on
education, it has allowed for some positive action on the system
to take place in Manchester.
As a low-income community with a large population of
minorities this pandemic has given the opportunity for the city

11. as a whole to stand back and re-evaluate the organization of its
high schools. Most notably, the idea to merge Memorial High
and Manchester School of Technology (MST). This topic has
been toggled around for years now.
By merging Memorial and MST, the large demographic of
students from low income families who are not looking at
college as an option will have the ability to graduate with
proficient skills to enter the work force.
As a former student in this community, I have had the chance to
experience student life at Memorial High School and to tour
MST. I would have to say that the student life is much more
inclusive, and the learning environment is hands on and exiting
at MST, versus the more conventional schooling approach at
Memorial High. In fact, a lot of times, students at Memorial
tend to be less motivated to go to school or put effort into class
because it is geared towards preparing for a college education,
which many of them will not have the opportunity to recieve.
By merging with MST, these students will have the ability to
gain useful skills based on their interests that will prepare them
for work in the real world.
MST, as a CTE school includes many programs including a
fully functional restaurant, hair salon, daycare, and even a
mechanic shop, where students have the ability to interact with
real people and gain real world experience to give them a
competitive edge when looking to enter the workforce.
Photos from the Manchester School of Technology Instagram
and Webpage
In addition, the school provides common curriculum in order to
prepare those students who are looking to further their
education for college. This has proved to be very successful, as

12. the graduation rate is roughly 81% in 4 years and 96% in 5
years, with a daily attendance rate of 95%. At Memorial, the
graduation rate is a striking 78% with a daily attendance rate of
approximately 85% which could be greatly aided with a merge.
The enrollment rate of Memorial High school has also been
steadily declining over the past two decades, while MST, as a
newer school has had a consistent growth in enrollment with the
appeal of a new method to education. With the merger, the
school would have more funding to expand their programs to
continue and increase enrollment, and the success rate among
more teens in the community would increase as a result.
Charts taken from the NH Department of Education website
It has been argued that this merger will take a lot of time and
effort to create a smooth transition, and although this will take
time, there is no time better than the present with school being
out for the remainder of this year to begin to make plans for the
merger. I know that there is a lot a hesitance within the
community to go through with this because of the work and
money that it involves, including a dramatic expansion in class
size at MST, but this could be a new solution to helping the
large population of teens deemed “at-risk” by their
demographics to exit high school on the path to a successful
career rather than a criminal record.
It is time for the community to come together and vote to merge
these two schools together. The school board has realized that it
is time for change, and so I prompt the community to welcome
and support this change with open arms, as this can drastically
improve the future of thousands of teens to come.
The coronavirus has been hard on everyone, so why not take
this time to work on making positive changes within the

13. community and its education system by working to merge
Memorial and MST. This change is not going to be a quick one,
it will take time, but the sooner we start, the sooner it will
happen and the more lives we will be able to transform within
the community.
Source Links:

14. https://cdn.manchesterinklink.com/wp-
content/uploads/2019/04/D_student_aircraft_build.jpg
https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fmanch
esterinklink.com%2Fphrma-grant-supports-stem-programs-at-
manchester-school-of-
technology%2F&psig=AOvVaw3aWbJCnM5ZFK-
LZD2RriSc&ust=1588800319630000&source=images&cd=vfe&
ved=0CAIQjRxqFwoTCMjx4tHUnekCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAh
https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fmanch
esterinklink.com%2Fbook-beauty-appointment-manchester-
school-
technology%2F&psig=AOvVaw1MfHNBEgSy74v4cFP6scCI&us
t=1588800614211000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAIQjRx
qFwoTCPjV1NTVnekCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD
https://mst.mansd.org/school-info/about-mst
Jake Hunter WP2 First Draft May 5th, 2020
Name： Jake Hunter
Got your sunscreen? Bathing suit? Spanish dictionary and the
$50 your Mom gave you for a meal at the airport? Then you’re
ready to visit one of the most beautiful lakes Central America
has to offer. Lake Atitlan is home to around five-hundred
thousand locals, three active volcanoes, and a once thriving

15. tourism scene. But what has changed since the early two-
thousands that has turned this incredible tourist destination into
a region filled with pollution and disease?
Since before tourist bloggers and travel gurus got their hands on
it, Lake Atitlan was Guatemala’s unfound gem. With its
gorgeous landscape of towering volcanoes and crystal blue
water, Atitlan offers a peace and serenity is truly magical.
But with tourists, comes trash. Many of the tourists visiting
from America were accustomed to a more… ‘comfortable’ life
style. This meant that they brought with them plastic waste in
the form of water bottles, cleaning products, food, and single
use plastic goods. Due to the economic instability of Guatemala
as a country, rural regions such as the town of Panajachel in
Atitlan have little in the way of infrastructure for garbage
disposal. This means that all of that waste? Goes straight to the
bottom of the lake.
(Above) A graph showing the bloom of cyanobacteria in 2009
On top of this, locals already lacked the sewage and waste
disposal systems to maintain adequate living standards. With
sewage runoff and waste already being pumped into the lake, a
dangerous evil began growing on the lake’s floor. In 2009,
experts confirmed the presence of cyanobacteria in the lakes
water. And years later, the problem has only gotten worse.
Since I was a child, my mother has been taking me back to her
home country of Guatemala twice a year. While this is mainly to
see her parents and my other relatives, our favorite place to
spend Christmas, Birthday’s or New Year’s is Lake Atitlan.
There is never a dull moment, whether it be swimming, water
skiing, scuba diving, or star gazing, there is always something
to do that makes you feel connected to the lake. Perhaps it was
this quality that has attached my family to heavily to Lake

16. Atitlan, with even my Grandfather having his ashes spread over
the lake in 2012.
It came as a shock to me when I arrived at the Lake in late July
of 2015, only to find my watery playground covered in a layer
of cyanobacteria. From our dock to towns miles across the lake,
a thick layer of bacteria was covering the surface. Naturally, I
was apprehensive to dip my toes into the gunk.
As I took a dive, two things struck me; there’s a dead fish in my
landing spot, and what I thought was an inch-thick layer of
gunk was over ten feet deep. As I cleaned myself off and
collected my thoughts, I was deeply saddened by the turn the
lake had taken, it was clear that the water was unclean and there
didn’t seem to be much being done about it.
I was right, so little is being done to solve the problem that
local businesses are rapidly going out of business. Local Pizza
and Steak house owner, Hilda Xitamul Yac spoke out saying
“Tourists don’t buy fish. They distrust it because they think it’s
from the lake.”. This of course led me to ask, why isn’t
anything being done?
The answer is more complex than it seems, unfortunately. The
bacteria are growing more in recent years due to agriculture in
the surrounding areas. With fertilizer tremendously boosting the
yields of rural farmers, phosphorus from these fertilizers runs
into the lake, exponentially boosting growth of cyanobacteria.
And with locals lacking in educational recourses, they are
unaware of the impact dumping trash and sewage has on their
environment.
Researchers such as Margaret Dix, at the Universidad de Valle
de Guatemala confirmed that strains of the bacteria are heavily
linked to degenerative brain diseases, and can affect the central
nervous system, kidney, and liver of both animals and humans.

17. It is difficult to restrict farmers usage of fertilizers, as it has
finally allowed them to break the financial prison their
countries economy has put them in. Thus, we must look to
include the population in developing environmental awareness.
Lake Atitlan is one of the most beautiful places in the world. If
we stop funding and educating the rural population on how to
halt the growth of cyanobacteria, their livelihoods as well as the
health of the lake, will die. Luckily, great steps are being made
by the Universidad de Valle de Guatemala in accordance with
the Government’s efforts to conserve the lake, setting up water
treatment plants for locals, and introducing waste management
systems. If we all do our part, hopefully my children will fall in
love with the lake, just as I did.
(Above) Lake Atitlan with cyanobacteria layers visible.
Works Cited:
Rejmankova, Eliska & Komárek, Jiří & Dix, Margaret &
Komárková, Jaroslava & Girón, Nancy. (2011). Cyanobacterial
blooms in Lake Atitlan, Guatemala. Limnologica. 41. 296-302.
10.1016/j.limno.2010.12.003.
Universidad de Valle de Guatemala Investigation:
https://www.uvg.edu.gt/investigacion/cea/