Jesus makes it very clear that we need to forgive others in order to be forgiven ourselves by God. Forgiveness is a key to having successful relationships. we will look at nine roadblocks to forgiveness from the book, "From Anger to Intimacy"
2. Matthew 6:12-15 And forgive us our
debts, As we forgive our debtors.
13 And do not lead us into
temptation, But deliver us from the
evil one. For Yours is the kingdom
and the power and the glory forever.
Amen. 14 "For if you forgive men
their trespasses, your heavenly
Father will also forgive you. 15 But if
you do not forgive men their
trespasses, neither will your Father
forgive your trespasses.
3. FORGIVENESS
A.Jesus make it very clear that we need to
forgive in order to be forgiven ourselves,
by God..
B.Nine Roadblocks To Forgiveness, taken
from the book From Anger to Intimacy.
C.Forgiveness is a key to having successful
relationships.
D.Overcome these nine forgiveness
roadblocks and watch your relationships
transform for the better.
4. Roadblock 1: Selfishness
A. James 4:1-3 Where do wars and fights come from
among you? Do they not come from your desires
for pleasure that war in your members? 2 You lust
and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot
obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have
because you do not ask. 3 You ask and do not
receive, because you ask amiss, that you may
spend it on your pleasures.
B. Philippians 2:3-4 Let nothing be done through
selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind
let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let
each of you look out not only for his own interests,
but also for the interests of others.
C. Serving is the antidote for selfishness.
D. Serving others is simply giving something away
and expecting nothing in return.
E. This transforms you – your attitude, your reactions
and, ultimately, the intimacy of your relationship.
5. Roadblock 2: Pride
A. Proverbs 29:23 A man's pride will bring him low,
But the humble in spirit will retain honor.
B. James 4:6-10 But He gives more grace. Therefore
He says: "God resists the proud, But gives grace to
the humble." 7 Therefore submit to God. Resist the
devil and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God
and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands,
you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-
minded. 9 Lament and mourn and weep! Let your
laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to
gloom. 10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the
Lord, and He will lift you up.
C. You increase in humility by recognizing that
everything you have and everything you are comes
from God. 2 Corinthians 3:5 Not that we are
sufficient of ourselves to think of anything as being
from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God,
D. The antidote to pride is dependence on God.
6. Roadblock 3: Insecurity
A. If you have been told for years that you don’t
measure up, that you’re a failure or that you’re not
good, those messages aren’t just in your mind;
they’re in your heart.
B. No matter what your insecurity, God wants you to
find your security in Him.
C. 1 John 3:1 Behold what manner of love the Father
has bestowed on us, that we should be called
children of God! Therefore the world does not know
us, because it did not know Him.
D. Romans 8:31-32 What then shall we say to these
things? If God is for us, who can be against us?
32 He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered
Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also
freely give us all things?
E. Be assured of God’s love for you.
F. This will set you free and revolutionize your
relationships.
7. Roadblock 4: Resentment
A. When seeds of resentment and bitterness are
planted in our soul and given time to grow, their
roots run deep.
B. Matthew 5:43-48 "You have heard that it was said,
'You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.'
44 But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those
who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and
pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute
you, 45 that you may be sons of your Father in
heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and
on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the
unjust. 46 For if you love those who love you, what
reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do
the same? 47 And if you greet your brethren only,
what do you do more than others? Do not even the
tax collectors do so? 48 Therefore you shall be
perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.
8. Roadblock 4: Resentment
C. Leviticus 19:17-18 'You shall not hate your
brother in your heart. You shall surely rebuke
your neighbor, and not bear sin because of him.
18 You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any
grudge against the children of your people, but
you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am
the LORD.
D. God gives us careful instruction not to allow the
roots of resentment to grow in our life.
E. Forgiving – letting go – allows you to pull out
the deepest roots of anger and resentment.
F. Just as God forgives you, you are to forgive
others.
9. Roadblock 5: Unresolved Anger
A. Unresolved anger is a poisonous drink, that destroys
the angry person the most.
B. Ephesians 4:26-27 "Be angry, and do not sin": do not
let the sun go down on your wrath, 27 nor give place
to the devil.
C. James 1:19-20 This you know, my beloved brethren.
But let everyone be quick to hear, slow to speak and
slow to anger; 20 for the anger of man does not
achieve the righteousness of God.
D. Hebrews 12:14-15 Pursue peace with all people, and
holiness, without which no one will see the Lord:
15 looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace
of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause
trouble, and by this many become defiled;
E. Don’t allow unresolved anger to hold you back from
who you are called (and created) to be.
F. When you resolve anger and seek forgiveness, not
only do you set the other person free, but you also
get free.
10. Roadblock 6: Not Recognizing
Your Weaknesses
A. You have to deal with your own issues and
struggles before you can help anyone else.
B. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 And He said to me, "My grace
is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect
in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather
boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may
rest upon me. 10 Therefore I take pleasure in
infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions,
in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak,
then I am strong.
C. Ephesians 6:10 Finally, my brethren, be strong in
the Lord and in the power of His might.
D. In the process of facing your own weakness, you
become a little less judgmental and a little more
loving toward others.
11. Roadblock 7:
Misunderstanding Forgiveness
A. Psalm 32:1 Blessed is he whose transgression is
forgiven, Whose sin is covered.
B. Hebrews 10:16-18 "This is the covenant that I will
make with them after those days, says the LORD: I
will put My laws into their hearts, and in their minds
I will write them," 17 then He adds, "Their sins and
their lawless deeds I will remember no more."
18 Now where there is remission of these, there is
no longer an offering for sin.
C. Forgiveness is like pushing a release button.
D. You let the other person go.
E. This doesn’t always mean forget. However, when
you do push the release button of forgiveness, you
give up your right to bring up the issue again and
make the other person feel bad about what he or
she has done.
12. Roadblock 8: Fear of
Condoning The Offense
A. Romans 12:17-21 Repay no one evil for evil. Have
regard for good things in the sight of all men. 18 If it
is possible, as much as depends on you, live
peaceably with all men. 19 Beloved, do not avenge
yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is
written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the
Lord. 20 Therefore "If your enemy is hungry, feed
him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so
doing you will heap coals of fire on his head." 21 Do
not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with
good.
B. You can offer forgiveness without condoning an
offense.
C. Your forgiveness of the offender doesn’t bring
God’s forgiveness.
13. Roadblock 9: The Passage of Time
A. The old adage that time heals all wounds is simply
not Biblical.
B. Ephesians 4:26-27 "Be angry, and do not sin": do
not let the sun go down on your wrath, 27 nor give
place to the devil.
C. Ecclesiastes 8:11-12 Because the sentence against
an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the
heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do
evil. 12 Though a sinner does evil a hundred times,
and his days are prolonged, yet I surely know that it
will be well with those who fear God, who fear
before Him.
D. No matter how much time has passed since an
offense, you need to take steps to resolve it – the
sooner the better.
E. Don’t allow time to stand in your way and prolong a
relationship wound.
14. DO YOU HAVE ANY ROADBLOCKS
TO FORGIVENESS?
A.Selfishness
B.Pride
C.Insecurity
D.Resentment
E. Unresolved anger
F. Not recognizing your weaknesses
G.Misunderstanding forgiveness
H.Fear of condoning the offence
I. The passage of time