Relationship in Marriage

RELATIONSHIP IN
MARRIAGE
The lifelong commitment of a man and his
wife to each other is something special.
God created marriage to bring joy and
blessing to men and women, and to be the
basis of a safe nurturing environment in
which children can grow up.
Kigume KaruriSaturday, March 31, 2018 1

• Marriage is described as a relationship in
which a man is united with his wife. Older
versions of the Bible use the expression that
the man is “to leave his father and mother
and cleave to his wife”. The idea is that the
union of two people in marriage creates a
bond so close and so important that it is like
the creation of a new life.
Saturday, March 31, 2018 Kigume Karuri 2

• It takes over from the families that we grew
up in and creates a new family unit.
• A real key to all relationships is
communication. If there is little or no
communication, then the relationship suffers.

• In order to communicate effectively.
• 1. Listen to understand rather than to be
understood.
• 2. Refuse to use the “silent treatment” when
something has not gone the way we wanted.

• 3. Never “save up” hurts and anger.
Unresolved anger in any relationship builds a
wall between the two people until it makes
that relationship difficult to work. Resolve to
start every day with a clean slate.

• 4. Attack the problem, not each other.
Remember that you love and respect each
other even in times of discouragement.
Keep the love you have at the forefront and
make sure the problem is secondary.

• 5. Deal with problems sooner rather than
later. We have already stated the problem
with saved-up hurts; therefore, purpose in
your relationship not to let a day go by with a
problem unresolved.

• 6. When dealing with problems, make sure
you put aside all lies, all falsehoods, and be
careful not to add exaggeration for effect.
Ephesians 4: 31 tells us, “Let all bitterness,
wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be
put away from you, with all malice.”

• Colossians 3: 9 says, “Do not lie to one
another, since you have put off the old man
with his deeds.” Later on, after the problem
is solved, the words we have used can make
it more difficult to be healed.

• 7. Refuse to make comments that are not
relevant to the situation at hand. This not
only clouds the issue and is intended to help
one side or the other, but it also hurts the
ability to communicate effectively. A war is
won by fighting one battle at a time. When
we try to bring up multiple issues, usually
nothing is solved.

• 8. Realize and utilize the right time to
communicate. There are bad times and good
times. When a husband comes home from
work, his body is there, but his mind might
not be. The same thing applies to a woman
who is busy with the kids, preparing dinner,
or dealing with other issues that are
important.

• Men and women are different. That is why it
says in Ephesians 5: 33, “Nevertheless let
each one of you in particular so love his own
wife as himself, and let the wife see that she
respects her husband.”
• God knew that we were different and had
different needs. God wired us differently.

• We must realize the differences and arrange
our expectations accordingly.
• We must decide today to give our marriage
relationship the priority times.
• Men must remember to listen with their
hearts and not only with their ears.

• What do we do when our relationship has
become strained, maybe estranged?
• 1. Endeavor to understand the ways we have
offended or hurt each other. It will mean
asking and listening with an open heart.
• 2. Admit our major part in weakening the
marriage. Until we admit our part, healing
cannot begin.

• 3. Express our sorrow to the other person
when we offend him or her. Do not hesitate
or rationalize.
• 4. Seek that person’s forgiveness for our
offensive behavior.

• 5. Let that person see our consistent and
sincere efforts to correct our offensive words
and actions. If our marriage has lost that
romantic spark, it is probably because
someone is wounded in his or her spirit, and
it needs to be dealt with.

• Relationships are destroyed by:
• 1. Small lies cause us to justify our thought
life.
• Once the small lie is believed, our thoughts
begin to manufacture reasons why we can
think unfaithful thoughts. Unfaithful
thoughts lead to unfaithful actions.
•Saturday, March 31, 2018 Kigume Karuri 17

• A small lie often begins with unresolved
disappointments or an unforgiving action.
When we start justifying our wrong thoughts,
we start down the road to destruction.

• 2. Small lies allow us to justify our actions.
• Once we bridge the gap of disobedience with
our thought life, it is a short journey to wrong
actions. Once our thought life has been
compromised, our actions are close behind.

3. Unkindness to each other
• Relationships can spiral downward quickly
when couples start saying “no” to the little
things they ask each other.

4. Withholding affection towards each other
• This is a way of punishing the other person or
to maintaining the upper hand. If you or your
partner is withholding love and affection
from each other, physical and emotional, it
could mature into a type of abuse.

5. Lack of time for each other
• Quality time with your spouse is necessary
and important to sustaining a happy
relationship. Not enough enough time with
your spouse can cause problems in a
relationship.

• 6. Broken trust.
• It takes a long time to build trust among the
spouses. Though you had been friends for a
long time, the marriage relationship brings a
new dawn in your life. You start knowing
each other better. Things you had not known
are now open to you.

• Trust even grows more. But if any of you
breaks up that trust, the emotional hurt
would be so much to bear and it becomes to
costly to regain the trust.

• It is possible to have goodrelationship in marriage.
• Always look for the positive in yourspouse. Buildtrust in the
relationship. Look for the good and not the bad.
• Your spouse is the greatest gift in your life.

Relationship in Marriage

More Related Content

What's hot

Similar to Relationship in Marriage

More from KIGUME Karuri

Recently uploaded

Relationship in Marriage