The document discusses bipolar disorder from the perspective of someone living with the condition. It describes the manic episodes which involve excessive energy, irritability, lack of sleep, and risky behaviors. Depressive episodes involve low energy, oversleeping, loss of interest in activities, feelings of hopelessness, and occasional suicidal thoughts. Bipolar disorder is caused by imbalances in neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin and often runs in families. Treatment involves medications like mood stabilizers as well as psychotherapy to develop coping strategies and regulate daily routines. While the condition causes emotional ups and downs, the individual sees themselves as more than just their illness.

1. My happysad double life

2. HUGE DISCLAIMER. READ!!!
This is a project for a high school AP Psychology course. This is a fictionalized
account of having a psychological ailment. For questions about this blog project or
its content please email the teacher, Laura Astorian: laura.astorian@cobbk12.org

3. What is bipolar disorder?
I have an illness that contains manic and depressive episodes. Basically, my brain
causes me to have short-term mood shifts, unusual mood and activity levels, and
interferes with daily task. Great

4. Manic episodes
During my manic stage, which can range from weeks to months, I have an usual
amount of energy, and this causes me to have lots of trouble sleeping. I can get
extremely irritable and agitated quickly. Sometimes, I gamble a lot when I’m in this
stage, and I don’t even notice until someone tells me. I usually don’t listen and
instead become frustrated with that person.

5. speed!!!
This is basically me in my manic stage.
I feel like I can conquer the world in
one day. I have so much speed, and
my optimism is out the roof. Because
my optimism is at such an unrealistic
range, I feel like my consciousness is
not there, or my superego went on
vacation.

6. Depressive episodes :(
During my depressive stage, that also last from weeks
to months, generally contains me moping around.
Compared to my manic stage, I barely have any energy,
and I’m very down all the time. Unlike my manic stages
where I can’t go to sleep, during my depressive stages, I
can’t seem to get out of bed. All my body wants to do is
sleep. I hate it. I also have such a loss in appetite. I
seem to not enjoy anything that I do before. I love to
play soccer, but when I’m in this stage, I can’t even
force myself to enjoy the sport. I’ve seem to lost interest
in everything suring the depressive stage. A few times
I’ve been suicidal too.

7. ugh...sad
I usually feel extremely hopeless during this stage. I
feel alone constantly, and I don’t even go out with my
family or I limit my interaction with family. I hate when I
have these episodes. I want to tell my myself to stop
being so down about everything, but it’s as if I have no
control when and what I do. I hate it. It’s beyond
frustrating.

8. Overall
Going from such a heightened energetic stage to an extremely self degrading
episode in a matter of weeks bogles my mind! I know that I shouldn’t shut the
people who care about me out, but that’s what always feels right. This applies to
both my manic and depressive stages.

9. HowDidievengetBipolarDisorder-Neurotransmitters
Well, bipolar disorder has a lot to do with
the neurotransmitters in the brain and
inheritance. The neurotransmitters that
affect mood is dopamine, glutamate,
GABA, norepinephrine, and serotonin.
These are all typically involved with
mood, stress, pleasure, reward, sleep,
and arousal within the body. Basically, a
lack many of those neurotransmitters
which results in my manic and
depressed episodes.

10. HowDidievengetBipolarDisorder-Inheritance
A person is more likely to get any mental illness if a first-degree relative had or has
the condition. For me, my mother had bipolar disorder. She was diagnosed with it
the same age I was too.

11. But why me....
When I was first diagnosed, I did not believe it. I
didn’t want to accept the fact that I had a mental
illness because I saw my mother struggle with it
even with her medication. I felt as if I was damaged
and there was no way I could be fixed. I was a
unfixable mess. I felt like this for years until I started
going to group therapy, and this is where I
gradually realized that I wasn't the only person
feeling the way I do. I know that my friends and
family always tried to understand what I was going
through, but in reality, no one could actually
understand until they’ve had the illness.

12. Conditionsthatcommonlyoccurwithbipolardisorder
When discussing with my doctor, they warned
me of other illnesses I automatically become
susceptible to. This included anxiety (social and
generalized), ADHD, addiction, and even
physical illnesses like heart disease or obesity.
Many people think alcohol or certain substances
can ease symptoms of bipolar disorder, but in
many cases it can trigger or prolong depression
or mania

13. Complications
Because bipolar is an illness that interferes with daily activities, there’s many
specific things the illness affects that makes certain task more difficult or overall
have more bad days than good. This can include problems with drugs, suicide
attempts, financial, legal, and relationship problems, and poor or frequent absences
from work.

14. Personal experience...
I’ve exhibit all of these complications. My lowest point when
attempting and failing to cope with this disorder was when I
tried to commit suicide but thankfully did not succeed. I was
on one of my depressive episodes for months, and I felt like
it would never end. I was in a constant loop of self
degrading thoughts and practically slept all the time. This
resulted in me getting kicked out of my dream school
because my GPA went in the toilet. But when I found out,
surprising to me now, I honestly did not care. I blamed
myself for everything that did not go right in my life which
only made my situation worse. Luckily, I was still living with
my parents at the time, so I wasn’t paying rent, but if I didn’t,
I’d be homeless or forced to move back home.

15. Test and Diagnoses
Testing for bipolar disorder typically consist of a mental evaluation and even lab
test. When testing for the disorder, the doctor asked me if I had any unusual
symptoms that I experienced, how long they’ve occurred, and how the symptoms
have disrupted my daily task or activities. The physician also asked about my family
history and drug or alcohol abuse, and what my symptoms were before, during, and
after my mannic and depressive episodes.

16. Treatment - medication
Physicians typically prescribe medications with
lithium in it because there’s evidence that ones
with lithium is the most effective. Many
medications include: mood stabilizers,
antipsychotics, antidepressants,
antidepressant-antipsychotics, and antianxiety
medications.

17. My medications
I take Lamotrigine which is a mood stabilizer, and what this does is reduce my
mood swings and prevent manic and depressive episodes. I had to “try” a lot of
medications before I found the right one which is what usually happen. The
medication make me feel like I’m me, not one of my manic or depressed
episodes. This disorder is great at making you feel isolated and alone. During the
manic stage, I feel as if I’m in a rush to do everything and I become destructive,
and the depressed episodes make me not want to do anything at all. This mood
disorder feels like almost an evil side to me and the medication helps suppress
that side so my real self can strive.

18. Psychotherapy
By definition, psychotherapy is the treatment of mental disorders by
psychological rather than medical means. One type of psychotherapy is
cognitive behavioral therapy which identifies negative behaviors and replaces
them with positive ones. This helps with coping with stress and identifying
what triggers episodes. Another effective psychotherapy is interpersonal and
social rhythm therapy (IPSRT) which helps to stabilize daily routines like ,
and exercise.

19. My experience...
I feel like therapy helped a lot with my bipolar,
and the medication and the therapy work very
well together. The medication did decrease
symptoms but the therapy really made me feel
like I had control of my illness. Without the
therapy, I wouldn’t be able to recognize my
symptoms. I’m able to, now, notice my behavior
and distinguish whether it's affecting my daily
activities or not.

20. Facts!!
● About 6 million Americans have been
diagnosed with bipolar disorder
● This disorder cannot be cured, only treated
● There are multiple types of bipolar disorder
● More common in older teens and young
adults

21. On a final note...
Overall, bipolar disorder has made my life an emotional rollercoaster, but this illness is not who I
am. Yes, it’s an illness I have but I do not think it should dictate how I’m viewed by others. I am so
much more than the lack of certain neurotransmitters I have in my body or the random mood
swings that happen during my manic and depressive. I feel that many people with mental
illnesses are very misunderstood, and society as of today do not see psychological disorders as
an illness because they cannot see it. People should become aware and empathetic of those who
suffer from mental illness, but what they should not do is pity those that are not completely
healthy because they’re so much more than a illness