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EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION!

THE GATEWAY TO RELATIONAL LONGEVITY!

When couples have the ability to communicate and interact with one another
effectively, it can ward off potential disasters and enrich the depth of relationships. Very
few of us have had sufficient modeling to talk and listen in a collaborative effort that
demands respect and integrity.

There are many hard to talk about topics that couples learn to avoid throughout their
relational journey. In our research we have found it is largely due to the fear of feeling
inadequate, as well as an attempt to avoid conflict. Consequently, these topics of
discussion get “swept under the carpet” in the hopes they will somehow mysteriously
rectify themselves.

The more skilled you are as a couple at regulating anger and anxiety, the greater
chance of success you will have at discussing these topics successfully, and in return
deepen the connection within the relationship. We (Kahunacoaches) have learned that
there are 3 entities within every relationship. They consist of the 2 individuals as well as
the relationship itself.

The 2 individuals can often fall into polarized patterns and any attempt to address the
conflicting issues result in fighting. Over time it isn’t unusual for the couple to distance
from one another, feel resentment towards each other, and live with the distancing
until it becomes too unbearable. Hence, the relational entity is severely damaged while
the 2 individuals perpetuate the distancing. The Effective Communication program
consists of 5 segments that infuses 6 core principles, broken down into 8 separate
sessions. Each segment builds on the next, until the couple has a full arsenal of tools
and skills for dialoging effectively; even with the “hard to talk about” topics.

As a result, the relational entity develops a strong fusion and all 3 entities find
balance.The most significant component to this program is how it gets the individuals
out of “right and wrong” thinking. Consequently, it creates a structure allowing the
couple to collaborate and build bridges to trust, utilizing the skills to find effective
solutions to the problems they are addressing. In short, the couple learns to journey
TOGETHER through any topic of discussion successfully. The 5 segments that we teach
as a program of transformation for relationships are as follows:

NEUTRALITY AND SURRENDER! This segment will teach you the couple, the ability to
listen deeply and fully, in order to understand your partner’s truth.

HONESTY: THE WORDS YOU CHOOSE, THE WORDS YOU USE! This segment will teach
the skill of artful expression allowing for honest transmission of thoughts and feelings,
while regulating the emotional climate.

KINDNESS: THE ADMIRATION AND ADORATION SKILL! This segment starts to put the
skills to use while focusing on the strengthening of the relational entity.

TRUSTWORTHINESS AND AUTHENTICITY: THE COLLABORATIVE DIALOG! This
segment will teach couples to walk through topics for discussion from start to finish
using the skills they have learned thus far.

HOW TO GET BACK ON THE TRACK IF THE DIALOG STARTS TO DERAIL! This segment
teaches couples how to reestablish a bridge if the dialog begins to derail or if the
emotional climate gets too charged to continue.



The Kahunacoaches

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Effective Communication

  • 1. EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION! THE GATEWAY TO RELATIONAL LONGEVITY! When couples have the ability to communicate and interact with one another effectively, it can ward off potential disasters and enrich the depth of relationships. Very few of us have had sufficient modeling to talk and listen in a collaborative effort that demands respect and integrity. There are many hard to talk about topics that couples learn to avoid throughout their relational journey. In our research we have found it is largely due to the fear of feeling inadequate, as well as an attempt to avoid conflict. Consequently, these topics of discussion get “swept under the carpet” in the hopes they will somehow mysteriously rectify themselves. The more skilled you are as a couple at regulating anger and anxiety, the greater chance of success you will have at discussing these topics successfully, and in return deepen the connection within the relationship. We (Kahunacoaches) have learned that there are 3 entities within every relationship. They consist of the 2 individuals as well as the relationship itself. The 2 individuals can often fall into polarized patterns and any attempt to address the conflicting issues result in fighting. Over time it isn’t unusual for the couple to distance from one another, feel resentment towards each other, and live with the distancing until it becomes too unbearable. Hence, the relational entity is severely damaged while the 2 individuals perpetuate the distancing. The Effective Communication program consists of 5 segments that infuses 6 core principles, broken down into 8 separate sessions. Each segment builds on the next, until the couple has a full arsenal of tools and skills for dialoging effectively; even with the “hard to talk about” topics. As a result, the relational entity develops a strong fusion and all 3 entities find balance.The most significant component to this program is how it gets the individuals out of “right and wrong” thinking. Consequently, it creates a structure allowing the couple to collaborate and build bridges to trust, utilizing the skills to find effective solutions to the problems they are addressing. In short, the couple learns to journey TOGETHER through any topic of discussion successfully. The 5 segments that we teach as a program of transformation for relationships are as follows: NEUTRALITY AND SURRENDER! This segment will teach you the couple, the ability to
  • 2. listen deeply and fully, in order to understand your partner’s truth. HONESTY: THE WORDS YOU CHOOSE, THE WORDS YOU USE! This segment will teach the skill of artful expression allowing for honest transmission of thoughts and feelings, while regulating the emotional climate. KINDNESS: THE ADMIRATION AND ADORATION SKILL! This segment starts to put the skills to use while focusing on the strengthening of the relational entity. TRUSTWORTHINESS AND AUTHENTICITY: THE COLLABORATIVE DIALOG! This segment will teach couples to walk through topics for discussion from start to finish using the skills they have learned thus far. HOW TO GET BACK ON THE TRACK IF THE DIALOG STARTS TO DERAIL! This segment teaches couples how to reestablish a bridge if the dialog begins to derail or if the emotional climate gets too charged to continue. The Kahunacoaches