This document provides directions for editing a student essay draft. It instructs the editor to correct the draft in red pen and write comments. The editor is directed to check that the introduction includes the subject, the author's opinion, and explains how they came to feel that way. Each body paragraph should explain one of the three aspects supporting the thesis. The conclusion should restate the thesis and explain why others should agree. The editor is told to have the student revise the draft and submit a second version, addressing issues like repetitive sentence structure, verbs, and word count.

1. ROUGH DRAFT 1 Content

2. DIRECTIONS Correct the essay in red pen. Write your name on the top of the paper. Next to your name, write the heading of the slide that you’re checking for. Write comments on what they did wrong. Comment in complete sentences on what they did right.

3. INTRODUCTION What is the subject of their essay? Do they love it or hate it? Does it explain how they came to love or hate it? Does it have a thesis statement that includes their subject, if they like it or not, and the 3 aspects of their subject? Does the thesis statement seem like it is something that they are going to try and prove?

4. BODY What aspect is each body paragraph explaining? Does it have a topic sentence? Does it explain how the aspect makes their subject good or bad? Is it explained well? Explain.

5. CONCLUSION Does it have a thesis statement that includes their subject, if they like it or not, and the 3 aspects of their subject? Does the thesis statement seem like it is a fact now that they have proved it? Is that thesis statement in the conclusion the same as the one in the introduction? Does it explain why everyone else should love or hate it?

6. WHAT NOW… Make changes on Rough Draft 1. Rewrite the draft into rough draft 2. Bring your rough draft 2 next time. Rough Draft 1 will be collected next time.

7. NEXT TIME… Rough Draft 2 will be the Dissection Sheet Rough Draft. If the beginning of your sentences continually begin with the same words, change a few. If you’re using the same verbs constantly, change it. If the number of words in your essay are about the same, add a few words in certain sentences to vary it. For the “special” section, check for “just” and “way”. If they are present, find other words to use.