Common Errors by Korean Authors& How to Structure a Scientific Manuscript

Common Errors by Korean Authors
Presented by:
Kwangil Oh, MA in Publishing Studies
Director & Academic publication consultant, Editage

1. Scientific Writing (Misconceptions and Errors)
2. Modifiers
3. Noun Strings
Session Outline
2

Nature publication in 1869
4
Bennett W. Alfred (1869) On the Fertilisation of Winter-Flowering Plants. Nature 1(1):11

5
Bennett W. Alfred (1869) On the Fertilisation of Winter-Flowering Plants. Nature 1(1):11
Nature publication in 1869
Another beautiful contrast to this arrangement is afforded
by those plants which, though natives of warmer climates,
continues in our gardens in the depth of winter. An
example of this class is furnished by the common yellow
jasmine, Jasminium nudiflorum, from China…

Misconceptions in Scientific Writing
• Fancy writing
• Passive voice is
preferred over the
active voice
– Avoid We’s and I’s
altogether
• Only facts should be
included

Types of Errors in Manuscript Writing
Punctuation
Word
Choice
Sentence
Structure
Continuity
Comparison
ClarityContentGrammar

Noun
Strings
Modifiers
Common Errors in Grammar

What Are Noun Strings?
• Contains a noun(s) that modifies another noun
NOUN + NOUN + … NOUN

What Are Noun Strings?
• Contains a noun(s) that modifies another noun
blood flow  flow of blood
cancer treatment  treatment of cancer
plasma membrane  membrane of plasma
deoxyribonucleic acid or DNA
scanning electron microscopy or SEM

• Overuse of nouns as modifiers cause lack of
clarity
The Problem with Noun Strings
a 15-day-old female mouse embryo
dorsal root ganglia
The Scientific Literature: A Guided Tour edited by Joseph E. Harmon, Alan G. Gross

• Overuse of nouns as modifiers cause lack of
clarity
the dorsal root of the ganglia of a
15-day-old embryo from a female
mouse
The Scientific Literature: A Guided Tour edited by Joseph E. Harmon, Alan G. Gross

Brevity Clarity

Untangling Noun Strings
1. Expand them using prepositions
2. Turn the modifier noun into its
adjective form
3. If you must use noun strings,
use hyphens to make them
clearer

Example 1
diabetes patient
①Where is the main noun?
②Where is the modifying noun?

Example 1
diabetes patient
①“patient” is the main noun
②The noun “diabetes” is the modifier
② ①

About
Above
Across
After
Against
Along
Amid
Among
Around
At
Before
Behind
Below
Beneath
Beside
Between
Beyond
By
Down
During
Except
For
From
In
Inside
Instead
Into
Near
Of
Off
On
Over
Past
Since
Through
Throughout
Toward
Under
Underneath
Until
Unto
Up
Upon
With
Within
Without
Example 1- use prepositions
18

Example 2
a depression episode

Which sounds better?
a depression episode
a depressive episode
VS

• “depression symptoms” queried in PubMed gives
3897 hits
Which Sounds Better?
3897 hits

• “depressive symptoms” queried in PubMed gives
34375 hits
Which Sounds better?
34375 hits

Example 3
elderly over-the-counter drug users
①Where is the main noun?
②Where is the modifying noun(s)?

Example 3 – use prepositions
drug users

Example 3 – use prepositions
drug users
users of drugs
a garden of roses an opener of cans

Example 3
elderly over-the-counter drug users

• community hospital program
• risk factor surveillance system
• baseline CD4 cell counts
• sudden infant death syndrome
• nicotine replacement program
• clinical research organization
• placebo pain medication
Examples of Accepted Noun Strings
three-item or
even four-item
noun strings

Examples of Accepted Noun Strings
sudden infant death syndrome

• Search on PubMed whether the terminology is
listed in the Medical Subject Headings
Use the MeSH to Check for Indexed Terms

• “Sudden Infant Death” is a listed MeSH term.
• MeSH Unique ID: D013398

1. Other entry terms
2. Indexing used

Example 4—use hyphens for clarity
32
Large vessel diseases, including
aortic aneurysms and dissections,
account for 1–2% of all deaths in
Western countries.
Large dissections, however, can
completely close the artery,
stopping downstream blood flow.

Example 4—use hyphens for clarity
33
a large-vessel dissection
a dissection of the large vessel
a large vessel dissection
a large dissection of the vessel
with hyphen
without hyphen

Basic Grammar—Concept of Modifiers
35
She told him that she loved him.
She only told him that she loved him.
She told only him that she loved him.
She told him only that she loved him.
She told him that only she loved him.
She told him that she only loved him.
She told him that she loved only him.
Add the modifier “only”

36
She told him that she loved him.
She only told him that she loved him.
She told only him that she loved him.
She told him only that she loved him.
She told him that only she loved him.
She told him that she only loved him.
She told him that she loved only him.
Finally!

37
Anderson, who claimed to be the
missing Anastasia, requested that
she be cremated before her death.
Can you spot where the modifier is?

• Bring the modifier as close as possible to what it
is modifying
38
Anderson, who claimed to be the
missing Anastasia before her
death, requested that she be
cremated.

What Are Modifiers?
• Can be a word, a phrase, or even a clause
• Modifies another word (noun, verb, or adjective),
phrase, or clause.

Important Principles of Modifiers
1. Place them as close as possible to
the word(s) being modified
2. Ensure that the word(s) being
modified is actually there

Adjectival modifiers
 Modifies nouns & pronouns
 Participles can only be adjectival modifiers
Types of Modifiers
Adverbial modifiers
 Modifies verbs
 Prepositional phrases

Modifies
Nouns
How
many?
Which?
Which
one?
What
kind of?
Adjectival Modifiers
43

Modifies
Nouns
How
many?
Which?
Which
one?
What
kind of?
Adjectival Modifiers
44
The warehouses
*owned by the
Townsons burnt down.
The cup #on the
windowsill needs
washing.
There are eleven
pupils absent.
*participles
#prepositions

Modifies
Verbs
When?
Why?
To what
extent?
How?
Where?
Adverbial Modifiers
46
Anderson claimed to be
the missing Anastasia
before* her death.
*prepositions

1. A modifier that is not close enough in the
sentence to the person, place, or thing that it
modifies
2. A modifier that does not have anything in the
sentence to modify
Definitions
Misplaced modifiers
Dangling modifiers

How to Find a Misplaced Modifier—1
• Can you find where the modifier is?
• Can you find what is being modified?
Systemic diseases that may contribute
to periodontal diseases such as
diabetes should be well controlled.

1. Re-structure the sentence
2. Use commas to omit nonrestrictive elements
REVISION
Systemic diseases, such as diabetes,
that may contribute to periodontal
diseases should be well controlled.

“such as diabetes”
Adjectival modifiers Adverbial modifiers

“such as diabetes”
• What kind of
systemic disease?
• Adjectival
prepositional
phrase
What
kind of

We studied serum samples from participants
stored in the departmental laboratory.
• Can you spot the modifier?

REVISION
We studied serum samples, stored in the
departmental laboratory, from participants.

REVISION
We studied serum samples, stored in the
departmental laboratory, from participants.
Better REVISION
We studied the participants’ serum samples
stored in the departmental laboratory.

“stored in the departmental laboratory”
• Which serum
samples?
• Adjectival
participial phrase
Which?

How to Find a Dangling Modifier
• How can a modifier
possibly dangle?

How to Find a Dangling Modifier
• Can you spot the dangling modifier?
As a pediatric oncologist, the
opportunity to work with these
courageous children is wonderful.

Correcting a Dangling Modifier
As a pediatric oncologist, I have the
wonderful opportunity to work with
these courageous children.
1. Add the missing noun (usually the real subject)

Correcting a Dangling Modifier
I, as a pediatric oncologist, have the
wonderful opportunity to work with
these courageous children.
1. Add the missing noun (usually the real subject)

“as a pediatric oncologist”
• What kind of
person?
• Adjectival
prepositional
phrase
What
kind of

• One of the commonly misused participles among
Korean authors
An Example with “based on”
63

• Can you spot where the problematic modifier is?
• Is it a misplaced modifier or a dangling modifier?
64
Based on the results of this study, we
recommend increasing the dosage of
investigational drug.

• There are two modifiers
1. “Based on the results of this study”
2. “of investigational drug”
65
What do
they modify?

• “Based on the results of this study” seems to
modify “we”. How can we interpret this?
66
A dangling modifier

• Add the missing noun as the subject (which is its
rightful place)
67
Based on the results of this study, our
recommendation is increasing the
dosage of investigational drug.
SOLUTION: Add the missing noun!

• Re-structure the sentence
68
recommendation is that the dosage
of investigational drug be increased.
SOLUTION: Re-
structure the sentence

“Based on the results of this study”
• What kind of
recommendation?
• Adjectival
participial phrase
What
kind of

recommendation is that the dosage of
investigational drug be increased.
What
kind of

We are making this recommendation
because the results of this study says
it’s a good idea.
Why??

72
investigational drug be increased.
Adjectival
modifier
On the basis of this study, our
investigational drug be increased.Adverbial
modifier

• Noun strings
• Types of Modifiers
• Misplaced modifiers
• Dangling modifiers
To end
73

• Essentials of Writing Biomedical Research
Papers—Mimi Zeiger
• AMA Manual of Style: A Guide for Authors and
Editors
Writing Resources
74

Lastly, your feedback
on this session would
be appreciated!
76

Contact Details
Dr. EddyTM personifies our efforts to support
authors with good publication practices. He can
be found at Editage Insights
http://www.editage.com/insights/ask-dr-eddy
Cactus Communications Korea Co., Ltd.
4F, 22, World Cup buk-ro, Mapo-gu, Seoul, Republic of Korea
03992
Website: http://www.editage.co.kr/
E-mail: insights@editage.co.kr
77

How to structure a scientific
manuscript
Presented by:
Kwangil Oh, MA in Publishing Studies
Director & Academic Publication Consultant at Editage

About Me
2
• Director & Academic publication consultant, Editage
• Participated in the production of English Language Teaching textbooks at ELT Division,
Oxford University Press
• MA in Publishing Studies and MBA at Oxford Brookes University

Introduction
Method
Results
Discussion
The IMRAD Structure
4
And
IMRAD
• The most basic structure of a scientific
manuscript

An introduction should…
1. identify the topic
& provide sufficient background for it
2. state the question/hypothesis you are investigating
3. briefly describe the experimental approach
4. highlight the importance or novelty of findings
Aim and Content of the Introduction
6

Organization of the Introduction
7
a funnel structure
background
question

General Sentences Within the Introduction
1. identify the topic & provide sufficient
background for it
2. state the question/hypothesis you are
investigating
3. briefly describe the experimental approach
4. highlight the importance or novelty of the
study

Example Paper
Voigt CC, Roeleke M, Marggraf L, Pētersons G, Voigt-Heucke SL (2017) Migratory bats
respond to artificial green light with positive phototaxis. PLoS ONE 12(5): e0177748.

(1) Background
Funnel: wide
1. General or specific statements about what is known
2. General or specific statements of current problems
3. Present findings from previous studies
Funnel: narrower
4. Specific statements about what is unknown

(1) Background
Artificial light at night is known to impair ecosystem
functioning and to influence animal assemblages.
Yet artificial light at night is rapidly increasing
worldwide, encroaching into previously dark habitats
at unprecedented rates.
Previous studies have highlighted that light-tolerant bat species
may hunt insects which are attracted to street lamps.
It is unclear whether migratory bats are attracted by
positive phototaxis at night.

(2) Question
Funnel: narrowest
• The most key statement in the introduction
background
question

(2) Question
Funnel: narrowest
• The most key statement in the introduction
Here, we specifically asked if migratory bats are drawn towards
artificial light by positive phototaxis, i.e. independent of the
presence of insects lured by the artificial light.
Here, we tested whether migratory bats are attracted to green
light.
In order to better understand the impact that artificial
illumination at night has on bat migration, we tested whether
migratory bats respond to green light at night when migrating in
late summer from North-Eastern to South-Western Europe.
1. The question is introduced in the past tense
2. The question is asked in the present tense

(2) Question
The
question
Inevitability
The
unknown

(2) Question-paper 1
It is unclear whether migratory bats are attracted
by positive phototaxis at night.

Are bats attracted or
not attracted??
Inevitability

Here, we specifically asked if migratory bats are
drawn towards artificial light by positive phototaxis.
Inevitability

(3) Experimental Approach
Funnel: narrowest
• A brief study design
• Description of basic methodology used

(3) Experimental Approach-paper 1
Funnel: narrowest
We conducted an experiment at the Latvian coast of the Baltic Sea.
In the centre of this migratory corridor, we placed a green-lighted
surface on top of a pole which was illuminated by 520 nm laser light
throughout the night.
We then recorded the activity of bats using automated acoustical
recorders when bats passed our experimental setup on their
southwards migration.
The method is described in the past tense

(4) Importance and Novelty
Funnel: varies
• General statement highlighting the importance or novelty of
the topic
• Suggest an important implication of findings

(4) Importance and Novelty
Here we argue that artificial light at night might impair the
orientation of migratory bats towards celestial cues, which are
known to be used by bats for navigation.
If so, migratory bats may too suffer from disorientation during
their annual journeys, for example when getting attracted to
offshore platforms or buoys illuminated by green light.
Thus, attraction of migratory bats towards anthropogenic
structures illuminated by green light could be fatal when bats
fly towards the sea in direction of such light sources.

Aim of the Methods Section
A method section should…
1. State the experiments carried out to answer
the question
2. Must contain sufficient detail for a trained
scientist to evaluate, repeat experiments, and
give reproducible results

Content of the Methods Section
1. Materials (e.g., chemicals, study population)
2. Methods
a. What you did and in which order you did it
b. How you did it
c. Why you did it
3. Other information (e.g. study approval, definitions,
assumptions)

25
eLife 2016;5:e18082 DOI: 10.7554/ELIFE.18082

Example Statements in the Methods Section
To examine the association between MDR and mortality, we
performed a multivariable logistic regression analysis adjusting for a
priori selected baseline confounders.
All analyses were performed using STATA version 14.0 (StataCorp LP,
College station, Texas, USA).
We conducted a retrospective, multicentre surveillance study of all
provincial hospitals in Northeast Thailand.
From the hospitals that agreed to participate, data were collected
from microbiology and hospital databases between January 2004
and December 2010.

Tense in the Methods Section
• Present tense is used only when describing how data are
presented in the paper, because this information is still true
– “Data are summarized as mean ± SD.”
Because they are statements about what you
did to answer the question, the methods
section is written in the past tense

• Can be either condensed or extended
Length of the Methods Section
28

Length of the Methods Section
29
Condensed Extended
No subheadings Named subheadings
Familiar, standard methods New or unusual methods
Uses abbreviations and citations Uses longer descriptions
Running series of verbs (e.g.
“collected, stained, and stored”)
Usually one finite (main) verb
per clause
Few “by+verb-ing” statements
explaining “how”
Several “how” statements
Few justifications explaining
“why”
Several justifications “in order
to…”
Few linking phrases Wide range of linking phrases
Adapted from Swales JM, Feak CB. Academic Writing for Graduate Students, 2nd ed. Ann Arbor: U of Michigan; 2004.

• Chronological
• Most important to least important
Keep a Consistent Order
30

Aim of the Results Section
A results section should…
1. State the results of the experiments
2. Discuss possible explanations for the
results
3. Direct readers to figures and tables that
present supporting data

Results Section: Don’t…
Report every result
Include only positive findings that support your hypothesis
Include all your data in the text

Results Section: Rather Do…
✓ Include only results pertinent to the question posed in the
Introduction
✓ Report both positive and negative results should be
reported (i.e., whether or not they support your
hypothesis)
✓ Summarize data into tables and figures

• Can you explain the
difference between these
two terms?
• In a paper, would you be
able to differentiate the two?
Results vs. Data
35

• Data are facts, raw or
transformed
• Results are general
statements that interpret
the data
Results vs. Data
36
In the results section, data can rarely stand
alone. They must be explained as results.

Results and Data
37
The proportion of bacteria being MDR was highest
in HAB and lowest in CAB for all organisms (all
p<0.001, Table.1).
The proportion of MRD variants of Staphylococcus
aureus was 94 of 1176 (8%) in CAB; 73 of 259 (28%)
in HCAB; and 222 in 446 (50%) in HAB. The
proportion of MRD variants of Escherichia coli was
1177 in 3382 (35%) in CAB; 288 in 494 (58%) in
HCAB; and 252 in 403 (63%) in HAB (Table.1).

Results and Data
38
eLife 2016;5:e18082 DOI: 10.7554/ELIFE.18082

Poll-which statement does not indicate results?
39
1. Vancomycin non-susceptible S. aureus was found in 6 out of
1380 tested isolates.
2. We did not observe a trend in the proportion of S. aureus
bacteraemia being caused by MRSA (Figure 2).
3. From 2004 to 2010, the proportions of community-acquired E.
coli bacteraemia being caused by E. coli unsusceptible to
extended-spectrum cephalosporins rose from 5% (9/169) to 23%
(186/815) (p=0.04) (Figure 3).
4. Of CAB, HCAB and HAB caused by S. aureus, 8%, 28%, and 50%
were caused by MDR S. aureus, respectively (p<0.001).

Statements Indicating Results
40
• Present tense is used only when referring readers to the
data (to figures and tables)
All parameters used to estimate the number of excess deaths in
Thailand are shown in Supplementary file 2.
Results are reported in the past tense,
because they are discrete events that
occurred in the past.

Statements Indicating Results
41
1. Vancomycin non-susceptible S. aureus was found in <1% of
tested isolates (6/1380).
2. We did not observe a trend in the proportion of S. aureus
bacteraemia being caused by MRSA (Figure 2).
3. From 2004 to 2010, the proportions of community-acquired E.
coli bacteraemia being caused by E. coli unsusceptible to
extended-spectrum cephalosporins rose from 5% (9/169) to 23%
(186/815) (p=0.04) (Figure 3).
4. Of CAB, HCAB and HAB caused by S. aureus, 8%, 28%, and 50%
were caused by MDR S. aureus, respectively (p<0.001).

Aim of the Discussion Section
A discussion section should…
1. State a clear answer to the question
2. Support, explain, and defend results
3. Establish limitations, implications, and
importance of findings

Common Errors in the Discussion Section
Do no write another Introduction
Do not restate results verbatim
Do not include irrelevant topics

General Sentences Within the Discussion
✓ State a clear answer to the question
✓ Support, explain, and defend results
✓ Establish limitations, implications, and
importance of findings

Statements Within the Discussion
46
• Stating the answer
– The question
We tested if migratory bats respond to artificial green light
at night during migration.

47
• Stating the answer
Our study is the first to show that migratory bats respond
with positive phototaxis towards green light at night,
which demonstrates that migratory bats are particularly
susceptible to artificial light at night.
We tested if migratory bats respond to artificial green light
at night during migration.

48
• Supporting, Explaining, and Defending
Our estimated mortality for those with MDR HAI (45,209, Table 2) is
higher than those previously published by Pumart et al. (38,481)
(Pumart et al., 2012), probably because we used 30-day mortality
rather than in-hospital mortality.
The high proportions of E. coli bactaeremia being caused by MRSA
are consistent with previous reports from other tropical countries.

49
• Limitations, Implications, and Importance
Our study highlights the need for public health officials and international
health organizations to improve systems to track and reduce the burden of
AMR in LMICs.
Our study confirms the importance of this species as a leading cause of
hospital-acquired MDR infection in a developing tropical country.
The rising proportions of community-acquired E. coli and hospital-
acquired Acinetobacter bacteraemia suggest that the burden of AMR in
Thailand is deteriorating over time.
A limitation of this study is that more complete clinical data were not
available.

50
• Limitations, Implications, and Importance
Our study highlights the need for public health officials and international
health organizations to improve systems to track and reduce the burden
of AMR in LMICs.
Three phrases are associated with the word “need”
1. Prepositional phrase using “for” answers “for whom”?
2. Infinitive phrase using “to-verb” answers “what kind of” need?
3. Infinitive phrase describes the “purpose” of why systems
should be improved.

Achieving readability in your writing
51

There are many ways to achieve readability
52
✓ Keep to the IMRAD structure
✓ Keep concise
✓ Keep an order (chronological or importance)
✓ Use the correct tense

be appreciated!
54

Contact Details
Kwangil Oh
Director & Academic publication consultant at Editage
kwangil@cactusglobal.com
Cactus Communications Korea Co., Ltd.
4F, 22, World Cup buk-ro, Mapo-gu, Seoul, Republic of Korea
03992
Website: http://www.editage.co.kr/
E-mail: insights@editage.co.kr
55

be appreciated!
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provide feedback.
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