Uploaded byBruno Sbille
Agile2013 Talk: Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members
This document discusses two psychological models - the VAK model and the drama triangle. The VAK model describes three preferred learning styles: visual (learning through seeing), auditory (learning through listening) and kinesthetic (learning through experience and doing). Most people have a dominant style but can use all three. The drama triangle explains toxic relationship dynamics where people take on roles as victim, rescuer or persecutor. It describes how these roles satisfy psychological needs but can be dysfunctional. Avoiding these roles and the triangle dynamics can prevent negative effects on projects and teams.
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Agile2013 Talk: Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members
- 1. Bruno Sbille Tools fromPsychology for coaches, trainers and team members
- 2. Who is @BrunoSbille?(hint: that’s me :) Bruno.sbille@gmail.com brunosbille.com
- 3. Psychology... A nice movie aboutPsychology. “Yes But”
- 4. Today we willdiscuss 2 tools, 2 models from psychology 1. The V.A.K Model. Neil Fleming (NLP: Neuro-linguistic programming) 2. The Drama Triangle Stephen Karpman (TA: Transactional Analysis)
- 5. NLP: Neuro LinguisticProgramming Bandler & Grinder
- 6. NLP approach •Observe talentedpeople •Identify common structures •Model (create a model) •Get other people to do it
- 7. Approach Where’s the problem?< Why it works ?
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- 11. I need youto find a buddy... Please stand-up, create teams of 2 Once your team is created, please sit.
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- 13. VAK (aka VAKOG) •V:Visual •A: Auditory •K: Kinesthetic •O: Olfactory •G: Gustatory
- 14. VAK or VAKOG? •V: Visual •A: Auditory •K: Kinesthetic (including Olfactory and Gustatory) Each of us has a preferred channel
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- 17. Auditory •Auditory learners bestlearn through listening (lectures, discussions, tapes, etc. •“What did you say?” •Credibility •Usually channel the most used •Can speak a lot to express one idea
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- 19. Kinesthetic •Tactile/kinesthetic learners prefer tolearn via experience—moving, touching, and doing •Importance of sensations, feelings •sensible to the working atmosphere •“You feel me?”
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- 21. Visual •visual learners havea preference for seeing (think in pictures; visual aids such as overhead slides, diagrams, handouts, etc.) •promotes understanding •Useful to get attention •“Do you see what I mean?”
- 22. What can youdo with these concepts ?
- 23. Who am I? Hint: Check the begin of the presentation
- 24. Your team, yourclass
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- 27. Boards and VisualManagement
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- 29. How to giverecognition, thanks people
- 31. If you area trainer
- 32. Want to knowmore http://www.businessballs.com/ vaklearningstylestest.htm http://www.idea-sandbox.com/ blog/2012/03/disney- brainstorming-method-dreamer- realist-and-spoiler/
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- 43. The Victim Needs I needa persecutor Benefits I attracts sympathy, I get attention People have pity on me
- 44. The Rescuer Needs I needsomeone (complaining) Benefits I get recognition I don’t have to focus on my own problems
- 45. The Persecutor Needs I needa victim I need a pretext, an excuse Benefits I get rid of my frustration I feel almighty, powerful
- 46. Unfortunately, this comeswith some perverse effects...
- 47. Victim Imagine a projectwhere the “victim” role is played. The person playing the “victim” role will absorb a significant part of the team’s energy
- 48. Rescuer Imagine a projectwhere the “rescuer” role is played. The rescuer will make the team dependent and passive
- 49. Persecutor Imagine a projectwhere the “rescuer” role is played. It creates fear, stress, lack of initiatives. Risk of blame culture
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- 51. The Victim •This isa pure human being, innocent, helpless •Passive, plaintive •Full of good will, but pursued by disasters. He/She annoyed others! •Blame “someone” for his/her problems •Benefits: attracts sympathy, pity
- 52. The Rescuer •Kind, generous,selfless, strong, brave •Trying to help without being asked •He flees his own problems by focusing on others problems •Profit: I fill my need for recognition •Makes the other passive, dependent
- 53. The Persecutor •Wicked, cruel,heartless can be violent •Uses intimidation, manipulation •Blocking the aisle of the supermarket with his caddy •Needs a pretext and a victim •Benefits: it evacuates his frustration (on someone) and feels omnipotent
- 54. How to avoid,escape the triangle ?
- 55. The Drama Triangle Victim Rescuer Persecutor YOUARE HERE Avoid a relation Victim - Persecutor
- 56. Facing a persecutor •Feelyour trigger •Stay firm and focus (let him/her live his anger) •Don’t go against him/her •Acknowledge you points you agree with •Counter Manipulation •You can leave the room
- 57. The Drama Triangle Victim Rescuer Persecutor YOUARE HERE Avoid a relation Rescuer - Victim
- 58. How not toplay with a victim If you can answer “Yes” to all these questions: you are not playing. 1: Did he/she expressed a request? 2: Am I available? 3: Am I qualified? 4: Is there an exchange?
- 59. How not toplay with a rescuer •Decline the request for assistance. Thank Him/her and change the subject •You decide of the scope and timing of his assistance •Give him/her recognition for what he/she is and not for what he/she does
- 60. And don’t forget...this is all about playing games... you choose to play...or not ;-)