1) The narrator is confined to his room as punishment for a rule violation and sits alone on Halloween night wondering how to pass the time. 2) He hears a tapping at his door and sees a giant bird standing before him in dress gray uniform. 3) The bird reveals that it has come to cheer the narrator, telling him that the football team will beat Navy that coming year. It also tells the narrator that he will be marching punishment tours "evermore."

1. The Maven*
By Fred Bothwell '62
(With apologies to E.A. Poe, ex 1834)
Once I was confined to quarters,1
High above the Hudson's waters,
In my room from dusk to morning sun.
In three long years I hadn't learned,
To play the game, so I had earned
Confinement stemming from a "two-dash-one."2
I sat in barracks every weekend
While my classmates left to seek
And find good times in parties, dates and fun.
Twice each week in consternation
I joined in the Area Formation,3
Marching off my "tours"4
before the Corps.
All Hallow's Eve I sat and pondered,
In my room alone, and wondered
How to pass the hours I had in store.
While I nodded, nearly napping,
Suddenly there came a tapping,
As of someone gently rapping,
Rapping at my chamber door.
"All Right"5
I muttered, with closed eyes,
It was the C.Q6
. I surmised,
That opened and then quickly shut the door.
But when I finally looked to see,
Something strange confronted me:
A sight that set off multiple alarms:
A giant bird7
in Dress Gray, Under Arms!8
*Maven: Hebrew “One who understands”, a trusted expert in
a particular field, who seeks to pass knowledge on to others
1
As punishment for a rule infraction, required to stay in one’s
room during normal free time for up to six months
2
An official form for reporting a rule infraction
3
As punishment for a rule infraction, a requirement to march
to and fro in a quadrangle (The Area) for up to 88 hours
during normally free time.
4
One “tour” equals one hour of Area Formation
5
“All Right” is an official statement that the respondent is in
compliance with rules in effect at the time the report is given
6
Cadet in Charge of Quarters – a cadet responsible for
inspecting rooms and determining that all cadets present are
in compliance with appropriate rules
7
Cadets who march punishment tours are known as “Area
Birds”
Its back was bent, its feet were flat,
But o'er the visor of its hat
It bore the sign of Pallas we all wore.9
I looked about to clear my head
And finally sat upon my bed
And tried to reason why he stood upon my floor.
At last I spoke and caught its eye,
And when I did I asked it why
It came, and what it meant
To me and to the Corps.
With gimlet eye it stared at me
And all at once, quite suddenly,
It raised a feathered limb and held it high.
"Take heart" quoth he, "let spirits fly,
My brother bird, for what is nigh
Will cheer the hearts of sons of slum and gravy!"10
"For what I see is very clear,
Let all who wonder surely hear:
This coming year we surely will BEAT NAVY!"
"This message ain't a mystery,
No matter what the history"
And saying that, he turned and neared the door.
"But hold!" said I, "don't go so fast,
Let us make this moment last,
Good bird, there's one more answer to be heard"
"If you can see ahead in time,
Please share more poop11
that you divine,
And speak to one more question just for me:
How long will I be on the Area with thee?"
Quoth the Maven: "Evermore!"12
8
The uniform worn when marching punishment tours in an
Area Formation carrying one’s rifle
9
The West Point emblem worn on the cadet cap includes an
image of the helmet of Pallas Athena
10
West Point cadets
11
Poop: Essential information
12
As a cadet I spent over 300 hours in Area Formations