This document discusses the concept of "Don't be a Child" in Transactional Analysis. It describes how this injunction can be handed down by parents who feel threatened by their child's childlike behavior or were never allowed to be childlike themselves. The injunction can also be adopted by eldest or only children who feel responsible for their parents or siblings. People who carry this injunction may feel awkward around children or stiffen up in fun social situations as adults. Finally, the document notes that some families believe having fun is lazy or sinful and that feeling good will lead to something bad happening.

1. Don’t be a Child Injunction

2. Prepared By
Manu Melwin Joy
Research Scholar
School of Management Studies
CUSAT, Kerala, India.
Phone – 9744551114
Mail – manu_melwinjoy@yahoo.com
Kindly restrict the use of slides for personal purpose.
Please seek permission to reproduce the same in public
forms and presentations.

3. Don’t Be a Child
This is another
injunction handed
out by parents, in
their child ego
state, feeling
threatened by
having their child
around.

4. Don’t Be a Child
Instead of wanting the baby
right out of way, the Child in
the parent says: “ There is
only room for one kid
around here – and that is
me. But I will put up with
you, so long as you behave
like a grown up instead of a
child”. This may be reflected
later on by verbal messages
like “You are too old to …..”
or “Big boys don’t cry”.

5. Don’t Be a Child
Don’t be a Child is also give out
by parents who were never
allowed to be child like
themselves and feel
threatened by child like
behavior. They may have been
reared in times of depression
or in a stern home where
worth and value were related
to doing.

6. Don’t Be a Child
Sometimes, eldest or only child
give themselves this
injunction. Seeing Mother and
Father arguing, an only child
may decide: “The only other
person around here is me. So I
must be the cause of the fight.
Therefore, it is up to me to do
something about it. I did better
grown up quickly so I can take
charge.” An eldest child may
decide similarly that she is
responsible for her younger
brothers and sisters.

7. Don’t Be a Child
If you feel awkward relating to
children, you probably carry
Don’t be a Child. The same is
probably true if you stiffen up
when you are at parties or in
similar fun situation among
other adults. “Don’t have fun”
and “Don’t enjoy” are
sometimes listed as variants of
Don’t be a Child.

8. Don’t Be a Child
For sure, we don’t need
to be in our child ego
state in order to have fun
or enjoy. But if you
decided as child that
having fun and enjoying
were things children did,
and that you were
supposed to be a solemn
little grown up, you may
well rubber band to that
decision when the
chance arises of having
fun at your present age.

9. Don’t Be a Child
In some families, if you are
having too much fun you are
labeled lazy or sinful. There
may be a magical belief that
if you feel so good,
something bad will happen.
So the way you magically
ward off evil is to not feel so
good.

10. Thank You

11. Other TA topics available on slideshare
1. Strokes - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/strokes-24081607.
2. Games People Play - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/psychological-games-
people-play.
3. Structural Analysis - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/the-ego-state-model.
4. What is TA? - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/what-ta-is
5. Cycles of Development - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/cycles-of-developement-
pamela-levin-transactional-analysis.
6. Stages of Cure - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/stages-of-cure.
7. Transactions - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/transactions-33677298.
8. Time Structuring - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/time-structuring.
9. Life Position - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/life-position.
10. Autonomy - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/autonomy-33690557.
11. Structural Pathology - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/structural-pathology.
12. Game Analysis - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/game-analysis-33725636.
13. Integrated Adult - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/integrated-adult.
14. Stroke Economy - http://www.slideshare.net/manumjoy/stroke-economy-
33826702.