2. What are your educational goals? 1. What challenges have you faced in achieving your educational goals and what have you learned from those challenges? 3.How will this scholarship help you achieve your educational goals at UT Dallas? 4.What additional circumstances should we consider? My life was confined to the small village of Murgap, Turkmenistan, a beautiful place, situated in the desert, surrounded by mountains with a flowing river of life-giving water. My life was shaped by custom. Children had to follow paths laid out for them by their parents. A man became a provider for his family, while a woman had to raise children and be a good wife. Growing up in a low class family, being not hated but strongly disliked and being always laughed at school because of being on the side of fairness discovered a big dream in me. My dream was to get an education in America. They called me a dreamer, but my parents sold their few cattle to buy my ticket to the United States. My dream had made me a risk-taker, and I came here with nothing, except a Visa and a community college acceptance. Kind benefactors here have helped me begin a long journey to reach high still-developing goals. In America I started looking at myself in a new way as I witnessed the impact of compassion, problem solving, and perseverance. I loved the freedom and embraced the opportunity to follow my dreams. Challenges were different. I began to grow by tutoring others, working very hard at my studies, and exploring every opportunity to learn and expand my capabilities. Then I discovered that I wanted to create and design innovative technologies to help improve the lives of people everywhere. Classes that were very difficult for me seemed to be my new challenge. But I discovered that I loved the work in science and mathematics. I was developing into having an engineering mindset. Today, I aspire to be an Electrical Engineer. I would like to achieve my Phd the matter fact. My main interest is in Solar Power. I would like to work at developing countries to help them with installing solar panels because solar energy is something that we will not run out and it requires little maintenance with high efficiency. Our country Turkmenistan is one of the sunniest countries in the world. However, we are still an underdeveloped nation. I believe getting a Phd in electrical engineering with emphasis in solar power will benefit my country and the others the most. I know it is the appropriate time for me to put these skills into use and to gain more knowledge by getting this scholarship and studying in the University of Texas at Dallas. And I also know that bringing a strong work ethic and a desire to succeed will help me to get better education, to gain more experience and to study the major I want to study. This is the only way I can get to the place where I belong in this life. Getting the scholarship will make my main dream come true. The way won’t be easy, but I am sure that t ...

1. 2. What are your educational goals?
1. What challenges have you faced in achieving your
educational goals and what have you learned from those
challenges?
3.How will this scholarship help you achieve your educational
goals at UT Dallas?
4.What additional circumstances should we consider?
My life was confined to the small village of Murgap,
Turkmenistan, a beautiful place, situated in the desert,
surrounded by mountains with a flowing river of life-giving
water. My life was shaped by custom. Children had to follow
paths laid out for them by their parents. A man became a
provider for his family, while a woman had to raise children and
be a good wife.
Growing up in a low class family, being not hated but strongly
disliked and being always laughed at school because of being on
the side of fairness discovered a big dream in me. My dream
was to get an education in America. They called me a dreamer,
but my parents sold their few cattle to buy my ticket to the
United States. My dream had made me a risk-taker, and I came
here with nothing, except a Visa and a community college
acceptance. Kind benefactors here have helped me begin a long
journey to reach high still-developing goals.
In America I started looking at myself in a new way as I
witnessed the impact of compassion, problem solving, and
perseverance. I loved the freedom and embraced the opportunity
to follow my dreams. Challenges were different. I began to
grow by tutoring others, working very hard at my studies, and
exploring every opportunity to learn and expand my
capabilities. Then I discovered that I wanted to create and
design innovative technologies to help improve the lives of
people everywhere. Classes that were very difficult for me
seemed to be my new challenge. But I discovered that I loved

2. the work in science and mathematics. I was developing into
having an engineering mindset.
Today, I aspire to be an Electrical Engineer. I would like to
achieve my Phd the matter fact. My main interest is in Solar
Power. I would like to work at developing countries to help
them with installing solar panels because solar energy is
something that we will not run out and it requires little
maintenance with high efficiency. Our country Turkmenistan is
one of the sunniest countries in the world. However, we are still
an underdeveloped nation. I believe getting a Phd in electrical
engineering with emphasis in solar power will benefit my
country and the others the most.
I know it is the appropriate time for me to put these skills into
use and to gain more knowledge by getting this scholarship and
studying in the University of Texas at Dallas. And I also know
that bringing a strong work ethic and a desire to succeed will
help me to get better education, to gain more experience and to
study the major I want to study. This is the only way I can get
to the place where I belong in this life.
Getting the scholarship will make my main dream come true.
The way won’t be easy, but I am sure that the result will be
worth it.
Mingjun Yan English1110: Draft of Primary Source Analysis
1/29/2018
Please simply revise this paper based on the instructor feedback
AND the detailed revision requirement!
The primary source is Gideon’s Kitchen. Please watch it before

3. revising this paper.
Instructor feedback of my own draft: Mingjun Yan, this is a
good start. You note how the sketch uses misdirection and
irony, but you could talk more about parody still. This sketch
parodies reality TV––how sensational it is, how it relies on
these cheap sort of cliff hangers. It takes these conventions and
makes them absurd, which in turn makes us laugh at the
conventions. For writing about parody, look at how it mimics its
source. Think about Hell's Kitchen and Gordon Ramsey's
persona, and look at how this sketch plays around with the
show's set up. Great work––keep writing!
Lauren Cook (cook.1112) , Feb 8 at 5:30pm
Your primary source is not too short. You can change it if you
are uncomfortable with it, but Key and Peele sketches work
well.
Detailed revision requirements:
At this point, you have completed the PSA rough
draft, spending a lot of time making the implicit explicit, and
delving into the world of your primary source. Like in the rough
draft, this paper will analyze, and as a result will address real
life issues. However, this paper is not about real life issues. It is
about a work of comedy that addresses a larger social issue. So,
for example, your paper might be about a Louis CK joke about
gender. You would want to write about the cultural assumptions
about gender at play, but this would all be addressed via your
primary source––"CK's joke about men at a bar draws on
stereotypes about male hyper sexuality..." What you do NOT
want to do: "CK's joke about men at a bar is true because men
regard sex like this..."
It's important to think about how cultural assumptions or
stereotypes work in your source, rather than merely list
different stereotypes that arise. Most of us can recognize
various stereotypes in comedy; the bigger question is how they
are being employed––are they challenging the stereotype? Are
they disparaging a group of people by using the stereotype?

4. One thing that might be a bit painful is that you are expected to
be critical of the source, which means you may need to––gasp––
talk about how your favorite comedian/show might be flawed.
This is a breakthrough moment, though. Your perspective is not
the only, nor the primary, perspective. Your favorite comedian's
perspective is not the only, nor the primary, perspective. By
stepping back and trying on multiple perspectives, you will
have a more holistic understanding of how your source works.
You won't hurt yourself by understanding other people and their
experiences.
Expectations of the PSA:
· 600-900 words, properly formatted, acceptable file format
· Demonstrates expertise with the primary source by moving
beyond the explicit
· Addresses the purpose of the primary source, and how rhetoric
works toward this end
· Is focused and coherent. Your PSA will deal with a lot of
ideas, and sometimes things don't feel like they "flow"––this is
expected at this point. What we mean by focused and coherent
is: are you connecting your claims with evidence (specific
examples from the source)? Are you articulating your ideas
clearly?
· USES OBSERVATION, INTERPRETATION, CLAIM
· At the close of your analysis, end with one or two analytical
“research questions” (questions that arise from observations
about the source) that you will use to begin thinking more
deeply about your topic and to help you find materials for the
upcoming Annotated Bibliography and Secondary Source
Integration. We will go over how to develop a research question
in class to aid you with this last portion of the assignment.
Original draft:

5. Having seen Key and Peele’s Black Ice, I found it super
enjoyable for me to watch their sketches. This weekend I came
across another fantastic piece of work created by Key and Peele
called Gideon’s Kitchen. In Gideon’s Kitchen, a chief makes
compliments of his apprentice’s dish the same time as belittling
it through artful arrangements of words.
At the beginning, the apprentice acted by Peele served a dish of
cake to the chief acted by Key, with his nervous face and
gingerly action. After Key tried the cake he said:
“unbelievable” which is a neutral word and which makes me, as
audience, look forward to what he is going to say. “I had a huge
problem with this dish,” said the chief together with a suddenly
intensified background music and Peele’s popped eyes. “that
you had to make it for me sooner.” The chief continuous, with a
lively music and Peele’s relieved face and words. However, the
chief added, “because if you had done that I could know how
good you are at cooking food that’s bad.” The thunder-like
music comes back again. “I said bad, I mean Michael Jackson
Bad”, the chief said, followed with Peele’s uncertainly happy
face. This is the first punchline to me which made me laugh as
well as the next one: “You know he looks really really bad at
the end of his life.” Same patterns went on, a bad comment
followed a good comment: “get off the shelf, because you
should be working in the finest restaurant in the world.”
Starting at this point, I think the comedians exaggerated the
situation to show the art of the word to the audience. A small
funny point here is Peele’s reaction to this compliment, which is
his saying “Thank you chief” with a supercilious look, which
also, in my opinion, brings the exaggeration down to earth since
that’s exactly one will do if being given too much ridiculous
comments from others. These ingenious controls kind of cater
the theme of contrasting as well as the primary fun-generating
function. Back to the sketch, the chief continuous, “that’s not
any world that I live in.” What’s funny is that the last thing the
Key performed, “In conclusion, aiiiiii…” with a gesture of
“just-so-so”, “it’s hard to tell its good or not”.

6. As far as I am concerned, what makes this sketch appealing is
that, first of all, it could set off heated discussions from the
audience. I see plenty of creative comments such as “This is
terrible…terribly good!”, “[K]eeye and [P]eele sucks…and by
sucks I mean they suck the sadness of my life.” By making this
small piece of “praise or belittle” sitcom, the comedians
successfully focused the attention of the audience onto the
beauty of words, the art of expression and the source of humor.
The same word can carry out totally different massages if being
craftily facilitated, and everyone, not only the artists, but also
the ordinary could make funs of the game of words. Another
trick that endows the sketch popularity is that proper
background music companied with the whole performance. This
trick is common but crucial in exaggerating contrasts, therefore
leading to stronger audience reflections.