The document provides background on the boy band One Direction and details the author's experience interviewing them. It describes how they rose to fame on The X Factor in 2010 and have since released 4 albums in 3 years. The author immerses themselves in the vast world of One Direction fandom and merchandise before meeting the band. During the interview, the band emphasizes giving back to their fans but are otherwise cautious and defensive when discussing the demands of their career.

1. Notlongago, I travelledtomountain-zoneAmerica,ona shorttrip to interview asinger,forwhichI
was pickedupina car laidon byone of the bigrecord labels.The drivernotedmyBritishaccentand
said,“You like One Direction?”
I hadn’tkeptup withOne Directionsince The XFactor,thoughI knew the rough narrative.The boy
bandhad finishedthirdin2010, and gone on to make decentgainsinthe Britishcharts,before
takingtheirpreppy,60s-influencedsynth-poptoAmerica–where theyboomed, sellingserver-
towers’worthof a firstalbum,Up All Night.Theirsecondandthirdalbums,2012’s Take Me Home
and 2013’s MidnightMemories,wenttoNo1. Theydefiedtheirriskyname anditshintof one-
dimensionalitybydiversifyingintomovies,perfumes,toothpaste,generallymakinggiddy-moneyfor
themselvesandtheirpatron,SimonCowell.
Sure,I toldthe driver,One Directionare fine.He saidthatthe band hadflownintotowna weekago,
and that he’ddrivenone of the boystohis hotel.Abouta15-minute journey.
I’mnot coldto the appeal of a well-steeredpopgroupbut,withOne Direction,I’dnotfeltthatsnap
that occurs whenanartist or a band suddenlycatchesyourinterest –snaringyou withan infectious
vocal,a novel look,ideallyanundeniablysuperbsong.There wassomethingaboutthe coywaythe
driverspoke,though,thatmade me wake upa bit.
You onlydrove one of them?Where were the others? “Indifferentcars,”the driversaid.
For a 15-minute drive? “Five members,five cars.”
Andright there,One Directionbecame intriguing.
***
It’sOctober,and the bandare promotinga new album, theirfourthinthree years.Theyagree to
meetme at the endof the month,twodays before Halloween.It’satime of year forordering
cardboard LouisandLiam masks(£3.99 each),ora top-to-toe outfitexactlyreplicatingZayn’s
letterman-jacketlookfromthe 2012 tour (£90). AlongwithOne Direction’snew album, Four,anda
thirdvolume of theirmemoirs,One Direction:Where We Are,there’sanew perfume outanda new
single streamingonline.Iknowthis,because inthe weekleadinguptomy meetingwiththe band,I

2. go full immersion,swimmingdeepinthe worldof One Direction,the YouTube clips,merch
catalogues,DVDs,albumstreams.
Four years’touring,releasing,deal-inkingandgeneralisedfanfarmingbythe bandhasestablisheda
vast,primitive oceanof stuff aroundOne Direction.Ilearn:MartinScorsese isafan, andthat each
bandmemberhasa lipstick.MidnightMemorieswasthe world’s biggestsellingalbumin2013. That
year’sdocumentary,One Direction:ThisIsUs, earnedsomuch at the box office thatCowell was
genuinelyannoyeditdidn’treceive anOscarnomination.Ataconcert inPeru,47 fanswere crushed,
needingtreatment.There are currentlyfourvarietiesof brandedbedclothes,notincludingsleeping
bags.
Harry Styles
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Harry Styles.Photograph:RJShaughnessy
Where were the humanboysinthe middle of this?LouisTomlinson(23),ZaynMalik,LiamPayne,
Niall Horan(all 21) and Harry Styles(20) showedupat regional auditionsforThe XFactor and were
pulledfromDoncaster,Bradford,Wolverhampton,DublinandCheshire respectively,tobe
transformedintoworld-straddlingagentsof profit. Theywere paid£30 a day as X Factor auditionees
and nowthey’re worthabout£16m a man. Louisnot longago triedtobuy a football club.Harry
ownsa £20,000 sculpture of Jesus.Niall,theysay,still loveshisNando’s.Zayn’sluckynumberis11.
Two of the boys are single,twoare coupledandone,Zayn,isengaged.
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Really,eventhesekernelsof biocome parceled inwarningwrap.Theirlivesare surroundedin
obfuscation,hopeful conjecture,nonsense.Lastspring,the Starwentto presswitha frontpage,
HARRY X-RATEDSEX PIC SHAME, thatby secondeditionwaschangedtoHARRY FURY AT FAKED SEX
PIC.I’m senta novel bySimon& Schuster,584 pagesof fantastical smutthatreimaginesthe band
not as popstarsbutas randycollege students.(Paramounthave the movie rights.) Backinthe spring,
Louisand Zaynfilmedthemselvesenjoyingacheekyspliff whileontourand the footage somehow
endeduponline.Before myinterview,I’msentawarningnotto raise the subject:“The band won’t
be answeringanyquestionsaboutthe Louis/Zayn‘drug’video.”

3. I speakto people inandaroundthe musicbusinessaboutthe band,toex-popstarsandindustry
lifers,tocriticsandglossymagazine editors.Mostare reluctanttogo on record.“Tread carefully,my
friend,”one publicistwarns.“Youdon’twantto upsetthe Overlord.”(He meansCowell.)Icontact
auditioneesfromthe relevant seriesof The XFactor, includingthose inaboybandpittedagainstOne
Direction.One sayshe’smovedonandhas takena jobwithITV; anotherisbusytouringthe country
inthe musical BloodBrothers.Igetholdof a guywho wenttothe same school as Liamand
remembersmockingThe XFactorhopeful behindhisback.Withinmonths,One Directionwere abig
deal andthe guyfrom Liam’sschool wasat college,tellingeveryone he metaboutthe association,
universallyknownasThe GuyWho Went To School With One Of One Direction.
Everyone hasa claim,an opinion,acriticism.Anemployeewhoworkedbackstage atthe Britawards
confirmsthata memberof Mumford& Sonsonce causedenormousoffence bymistakingmembers
of One Directionforcompetition-winningfans.Hoursbefore Itravel tomeetthe band,RogerDaltrey
of the Who launchesanunprovokedattackonOne Direction’smusical integrity,suggestingtheylack
purpose.Samplesof Harry’svomit,Iread,have beenlistedoneBay.He’dstoppedtobe sickonthe
side of the road while drivinginLA,andfansswooped.
***
WhenI firstgeta clearlookat them,these five youngmenwithaSri Lanka-sizedbodyof fans,they
are holdingwatermelons –personalisedwatermelons,eachpiece of fruittattooedwithaband
members’face.Some sortof skitisbeingfilmedformorningtelly.We are ina large studiocomplex
innorth London,the room dimexceptforwhere One Directionare sitting,ona spotlitsofa.
One Direction’ssingle Steal MyGirl
They’re all dressedinblackandgrey,an effort,theirstylistexplains,atmakingthem“slicker,more
rock‘n’roll”.Thisisthe thinkingbehindthe hair,too:shoulder-lengthforHarry,pushedbackwitha
headband forZayn,generallymodel-ishall round.The morningTV skitends,the watermelonsare
takenawayand I’m ledunderthe spotlightsforhandshakes.
The newalbumis yourfourthinthree years,I say.How longcan you maintainthispace before you
melt?
Liam,leatherjacketed,says:“Erm.It’san often-askedquestion.ButIthinkwe’re feelingprettygood.
We’ve justhada couple of daysoff,actually.”Louis,inaBruce SpringsteenT-shirt,correctshim:“A

4. couple of weeksoff.”Liam: “Couple of weeksoff,yeah.Couple of weeks.Sowe’vebeenchilling.But
we’re all prettyhard-working.We justenjoyitmore thananything.It’snota questionof burnout.”
To those people whohaven’tgivenyouralbumsalistenbefore,whyshouldthey?
“You know,I think, whynot?”Harry asks.He’s wearingasleevedvestand,unlike the others,who
are rapidand chirpy,speaksina slowdrawl – there’satouch of Eddie Izzard.Louistalksaboutthere
beingsomethingfortheirfansonthe record,butalsosomethingfortheirfans’parents – an 80s-
influencedseamthatmightbe foundnostalgic.
I wonderaboutRogerDaltrey. Was itfair forhimto suggestthat One Directionlackpurpose?
Louis:“Aaayyyuhhh...Imean,everyone’sentitledtotheirownopinion.” Liam:“Ididn’tevenhear
that.” Louis:“No,that’sthe firstI’ve heard of it.”
Zayn,wearinga knittedjumper,speaksaboutOne Directionnottryingtoimpressanyone.Louis
returnsto the matterof purpose.“Like,we’re doingasigningtoday,[because] it’sincredible togive
back to the fans.Andyou onlyhave tolookat how overwhelmedsomeof themare,evenjustfora
meetingwithus,it’sincredible.AndIthink,asa parent,lookingatthat,there’syourpurpose.You
know,we’re hopefullymakingpeoplehappy,so...”
I’mconfused – do youkeepbringingupparentsbecause I’mfromthe Guardian?
Louis:“Well,no.Maybe.Maybe.I don’tknow.” Niall,inagrey tee,hasbeenhangingback.Now he
leansinand says, “I don’tknowtoo many15-year-oldgirlswhoreadthe Guardian.” Thickly
accented,the Irishmansaysthiswiththe nucleardecisivenessof afinal word,amatter settled,and
Louisturns to him. “Nice,Niall,coveringthere.Droppingin.Sweeper!”
Zayn Malik
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Zayn Malik.Photograph: RJShaughnessy
What motivatesthisband?“Givingbackto the fans.”What do theymake of theireveryutterance
beingsecond-guessedbythose fans? “That’sjustpartof theirfandom.”

5. From here onI will redactall mentionsof fans,andof those fansbeinggreat.Justassume thatOne
Directionknowsithasfansand knowsitsfansto be supportive,because theireveryotherthoughtis
sunkunderthe weightof acknowledgingthis.WhenIaskaboutthe emotional burdenof theirwork,
all those complex infatuationstheycan’tpossiblyreciprocate,the boyssayit’snota burdenit’sa
privilege.Zayn:“If itwasn’tfor[redacted] we wouldn’tbe where we are.” Liam:“We justlike to
thinkabout[redacted].”Harry:“[Redacted].”
***
I’ve beenthinkingaboutthe fansmyself.Before Imeetthe band,Ispeakwithan editoratGQ, who
readsme some of the threatsthat were sentto hisoffice onthe band’sbehalf afterhismagazine
publishedaninterviewthoughtunflattering.“GQneedstoshutup,”ran one message,“before I
breakmy glassnail file intwoandstab theminthe eyes.”
I meetwitha non-violentsectionof the fanbase,twoEssex schoolgirlscalledElise andFranceswho
have beendevotedtoOne Directionsince the start.We spendanafternoontogether,the 15-year-
oldsdemonstratingthe extraordinarilyclosestudyof the bandthatoccupiesitsfollowers,dayto
day.We analyse one of Harry’s Instagrampicturesforhiddenmeaning.We discussone of Liam’s
tattoos– thickarrows onhis forearmthatthe girlsthinkreference the band’sname,andthatI
suggestare like those chevronsonmotorways,remindingeveryone tokeepata distance.There
exists,Elise andFrancessay,acavaliersub-groupof One DirectionfanswhobelieveHarryandLouis
to be unknowinglyinlovewitheachother,andthey’ve beenarguingthatcase foryears.
Both Elise andFranceshave had theirTwitteraccountssuspendedformessagingOne Directiontoo
often.Theycan tell me thatone of the band’sperfumeswas“exactlythe same asthe lastone,
exceptwithabit more greenapple”,evenwhileadmittingtheyboughtit.“Theymighthave touched
it.Theyhaven’t.Buttheymighthave.”The girlsare veteranfollowerswhofullyunderstandtheir
lowlypositioninthe One Directionenterprise,canidentifyitscynical workingsevenastheycontinue
to go wobblyandhigh-pitchedanddropa whole lotof theirparents’moneyonNiall,Louis,Harry,
Zayn andLiam.
In termsof receivingindividual attentionfromthe boys,FrancesandElise’soptionsare limited.
Throwinga “fake faint”at a gig isrumouredto have ledotherstobackstage encounters.(Frances:
“I’d seriouslyconsiderit.”) ProbablytheirbestbetliesinadoggedTwitterpursuit,sendingthe same
message toa memberoverandover in the hope of snaringhis attentionandgettingasmileyin
return.This,Francessays,meanssendingitabout400 times,well intothe realmthatTwitter
considersservice abuse,hence the frequentsuspensions.One Directionisthe firstmega-bandof the
social mediaage,andthishas a directknock-oneffectforme:the boyshave verylittle incentiveto

6. promote theirwaresthrougholdinstitutional channelssuchasthe press.Theydon’tgive long
interviews;theydon’tneedto.WhenFrancesandElise get home fromschool,theygoonline tosee
whatOne Directionare saying.AsithappensOne Directionare usuallysayingtheyhave anew
productout.
The interviewhalfwaygone,we’re talkingabouthow normal the boysare.Louis:“We’re normal
lads.”Zayn: “We’re normal guys.”They’re sittingshouldertoshoulderonthe sofa,leaningforward
on theirknees,polite,expertlymaintainingeyecontact.They’re musclierandinkierthanIexpected,
as if they’ve spentthe lastfewyearsonRiker’sIsland.Maybe it feelsabitlike thattoday.Iask about
a song on the newalbumcalledStockholmSyndrome.If youlotare captives,whoare yourjailers?
Harry gets infirst:“You.”
In lastyear’sdocumentary,ThisIsUs, Harry was the onlyone of the boysto prodout real laughs.
Whenthe gang were speculatingaboutwhatwouldhave happenedif they’dgone throughwithan
earlyplanto sack Zaynfor hischronic lateness,Harry,inhisunhurriedway,alittle Lennon-like with
hisquips,said:“Imagine.Niallwouldhave to be the MysteriousOne.”
I geta sense Harrywouldbe the most interestingbandmembertospeaktoalone.Of all of them,
people tell me againandagain,he’sthe one who’smanagedtoremainmostlevel,evenashe
romanceshiswayaround the majormetropolitanareas(LA’sKendellJenner,London’sCara
Delevingne, Nashville’sTaylorSwift)andbuddiesupwithAnnaWintouratfashionshows.Harry
you’dgo fora beerwith.
LouisTomlinson
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LouisTomlinson.Photograph:RJShaughnessy
But todayI’ve got the lotof themtogether,stewingunderthe spotlights.It’sall beenquite cautious,
quite defensive–the onlysteerawayfromthe official line Liam’scomment,atthe start, whenhe
jumpedathoughtaheadand blurtedout:“It’snot a questionof burnout.”
Four albumsinthree years,Ithink.Three books,amovie,twoworldtours,300-odd shows. What
else canit be a questionof?
***

7. “We were keptonthe road, and before youknow it,twoor three yearsandmillionsof dollarshad
gone by.”This wasone of the BackstreetBoys,speakingtoRollingStone atthe endof the 1990s. In
the same magazine,anotherBackstreetBoysaidhe’dtwice delayedessential heartsurgerybecause
of non-negotiable touringcommitments.Some yearsbefore this,anoverworkedRobbie Williams,
theninTake That, fell asleeponabelow-stage riserandwoke tofindhimselfinfrontof thousands.
Williamswasalsoonce soexhaustedafteratour thathe fell asleepduringsex withhisgirlfriendand,
on climaxing,shouted,“Peter!”Hername wasNatasha.
Those lasttwo storiescome fromFeel,abiographyaboutWilliamsbythe journalistChrisHeath,
writtenwiththe popstar’scollaboration.Feelisanindispensable documentforanyone hopingto
understandthe perksandunbalancedharassmentsof life inaboyband.The short-termeffectsof
too muchtravel and too manyhourstogether,the slower-burningdementiabroughtonbyround-
the-clockadoration.Williamswrites:“The firstcouple of yearswe were reallyquiteclose ...butthe
lastcouple of years,I don’tknow,itjustbecame mad ...Home life wasweird,andyou[got] aweird
perceptionof the world.Andthenthere’sahundredfuckinggirlsoutsideyourhouse …Andall of
that stuff mixedwiththe insane promotionthatwe did...We were tiredandscared.”
An equivalentvolume,One Direction:TiredAndScared,seemsunlikelytoarrive fora while.Butthey
are thisdecade’ssignificantboyband,biggerthanTake That everwere,andbusier,sotheymustbe
similarlytaxed.Inlastyear’sofficial documentary,the bandwere notmuchencouragedtodiscuss
emotional damage.We didgetpoignantlooksatthe mumsand dads,though,theirsceneshinting
that home life,asperFeel,hadgotweird.Louis’motherwasshownbuyingacardboardcutout of
herson inorder to saygoodnighttoit. Liam’smother:“Theybecome like someone inanewspaper
or a magazine toyou.”Harry’s stepfather:“Harrywenttoan auditionandnevercame home again.”
I’ve broughta copy of Williams’sbookwithme,andwhenIpull itout,theysay,“Oh great.Oh sick.”I
readthemthe “tiredandscared” passage.Williamswasrememberinglife inTake Thatafterfour
yearson the road. Doesitchime?
Louis:“I’dsay we’re tiredattimes. Butscared?” Niall:“No,notscared.”Zayn:“Where he says
‘scared’,maybe itwassomethingtodowithhimnot knowingwhere he wantedtogowithhimself.”
Harry: “I thinkwe’ve alsobeenluckyenoughtohave stuff thatwentonwiththem[Take That] as an
example.”Liam:“There wasa differenthierarchyinthatband.”
One Direction’sWhatMakesYou Beautiful

8. QuicklyI’ve come todreadLiam’sinterruptions,hisland-scorching“erms”thattendtohalt any
surroundingchat.Atone point,Ihearhim directingtraffic,murmuringtoLouisaftera question:
“You go, I’ll follow.”Byall accounts(sothe super-fanstoldme,sohisstylistsaid),Liamtookthe
longesttofindhisniche inthe band.Harry lockeddownthe role of SexyOne early,havinghadan
affairwithan X Factor host,Caroline Flack,16 yearshissenior.Louiswascheekyandconfident,and
so the FunnyOne.Niall smiley,inoffensive:the Nice One.ReticentZaynwasnamedMysterious,and
withthese otherrolestaken,Liamfinallyfoundhisplace asthe ResponsibleOne.
“We feel mostathome whenwe’re satwriting,oron stage,that’sour thing,”Liamtellsme flatly.
“There’snoreal gettingawayfrom it.”He’ll laterputa message onTwitterthatreads initsentirety
“Veryinterestingdaytoday”,andwhensucha thingisapprovinglyretweeted55,000 times,Iguess
there isn’ta lotof pressure tobe interesting.ButI’mencouragedhe hasbeenconsideringhierarchy
withinthe band.Theyall should.The time iscoming,itmustbe,whenthisunnaturallycontained
pack of maleswon’tbe able to go on ineachother’scompany.The songswill chafe,aswill the
schedule.One Directionwill splitbecause boybandsdo,atwhichpointhierarchy –in termsof an
individual’scharisma,musicianship,credibility,cool –isall that will matter.
Have theymade any sort of pact? That if one memberwantstoleave,the bandfolds?
Louis:“No,we haven’treally. Whatdoyou mean?”Liam:“No, we haven’tspokenaboutthat.”Zayn:
“What wouldthe pact entail?”Liam: “Well,Idon’tknow if itwill [fold].Withoutanyof us... Yeah,I
don’tthinkitwill,Ithinkthat’sthe magic of it. We still feel like we’reonourrise a little bit.”
Justabout everyone else Iaskedfeltthisbandwasneareritsendthanitsbeginning.Some had
doubtsOne Direction,pushingintoyearfive,wouldgomuchfurther.“Notlongfor thisworld,”a
glossy-mageditortoldme.Forwhatit’sworth,someone whoknowssomeone inthe band’scamp
saidthere wasnothinginthe diary afternextsummer.FrancesandElise,listeningtotracksfrom
Four withme,enjoyingit,suddenlyofferedthe following:“They’re 22,23 now.Theymusthate this
kindof music.”Frances:“Harry likesPinkFloyd.”Elise:“He’ssaidhe wasinspiredbyMickJagger.So
howcan he possiblyenjoysingingthese songs?”Ittookme a momenttorealise the girlsweren’t
beingcritical;theywere askingme todisagree withthem, reassure.
I couldn’t.The boyssayto me: “We’re justmakingthe musicthat we love.”Yetforall the funand
verve containedinanew-albumtracksuchas Girl Almighty,theirsisstillmusictargetedsquarelyat
one market,the clue to whichisin thatsong title.They’veputoutdecentpopsince 2011. They’re
pushedtotheirbestwhenEd Sheerancontributesatrackor two perrelease cycle.ButI’mnot
surpriseditgratedwhena Mumfordfailedtorecognise themasmusicians.The boysof One

9. Directionare ageingfasterthantheiroutput.If thisisa generalisation,it’sone basedonhardsales
data: theirsisnotmusic to whichearly-20smaleslisten.
Liam Payne
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Liam Payne.Photograph:RJShaughnessy
Harry, we learnedthissummer,hasbeenwritingonthe slywithRyanTedder,the songcrafter-
supreme behindsome majorBeyoncé.Niall isalifelongfanof Daltreyandthe Who.Zayn’smeantto
be deepintohishiphop.There’sonlyone directionthispoints.Butuntil the boybandactually
gatherfor that somberpressconference (asboybandsdo), discussionof theirsplitmustremain
mistyandspeculative.
Evenso, I’minterestedtounderstandwhatitfeelslike,whensuchagroup entersitsheavy-weather
phase,andindividualsstarttopat for theirparachutes.Iget intouch withsomeone whoknows.“It’s
suffocating,”saysCharlie Simpson,whobetween2002 and 2005 frontedthe boybandBusted.“I
was naive whenIstarted.Isigneda recorddeal,didn’thave togo to school anymore.We became
bigveryquickly,andwhenIstartedto realise the directionIwasgoingin”– he means,veryroughly,
dickingaroundwithwatermelonsonmorningTV – “it scaredme.The popside of me wasn’tthe true
side.AndIhad thishorrible fearthatif I got run overby a bus the nextday,it’sexactlywhatI’dbe
rememberedfor.”
SimpsonstayedinBustedthroughfourNo1s, twoBrit awards anda final show atWembleyatwhich
he was so appallinglyunder-motivated,hismumfoundhimafterwardsandtoldhimhe was
embarrassinghimself.Simpsonquittofounda rock group,at whichpointBustedceasedtooperate.
“People askwhyIwas so unhappybackthen.Theydon’tunderstandit – I was goingroundthe world
– butwhenitcame to contentment,itwasme whohad to getout of bedin the morning.”
***
Where,toborrow fromthe title of theirlatestmemoirs,are One Direction?Whohave theybecome
afterfour years’hardservice infrontline pop?MeetinganoldXFactor auditionee helpsme
understandwhere they’re not:ona crowdedlunchtime train,nospace onthe luggage racks,
dodginganattendantpushingacart of sandwichesandPeperamis.RyanLee Seagerispartof the
touringcompanyof BloodBrothersand I joinhimonthe trainfrom Londonto Leicester,where he’s
due for a matinee.Irecognise himimmediatelyfromthe coverof The X Factor Annual 2010, a copy
of whichwasamongElise andFrances’sextensive collectionof One Directionmemorabilia.

10. As we pull outof King’sCross,Ryantellsme that hisownboyband,knownasFYD, whichstoodfor
FollowYourDestinyorFindYour Destination(theyneveragreed),lastedaboutsix monthsafterthey
were eliminatedfromthe show.“Myfriendsjustcall me the WrongDirection.Iwas inthe wrong
band.”
Ryan’sstory:weekone onThe X Factor and FYD, alongwiththe otherfinalists,were movedintoa
poshLondonhouse where awatch and expensive headphoneswere leftonthe bedsandeveryone
was toldto stayout of the gardenbecause of papsin helicopters.WeektwoandRyan’sbandwere
votedoff,senthome.WeekfiveandRyanwasback on the programme – as one of the back-up
dancersfor that night’sguest,JustinBieber.Ryanshrugs:itwasgoodmoney.Hiscostume featureda
brimmedhatthat he keptlowoverhisface whenOne Direction,inthe wings,made polite
conversationwiththe dancers.He wastooembarrassedtoreveal himself.
The nexttime he saw anyof One Direction,Ryan’sownbandhadfoldedandhe’dbeenbookedasa
back-updancerat a corporate event.Waitingoutside,he saw Harrygo by ina £60,000 Range Rover.
Harry waved.Ryanwaved.“I wentthrougha goodsix months’of depressionafterthe show,”he
says.“Drinkingloads.Didn’twanttogo on publictransport,because you’dgetthemlooks.Ididn’t
wantto be knownasa failure.”
Niall Horan
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Niall Horan.Photograph:RJShaughnessy
Whenwe get off the trainat Leicester,Ryanrollsacigarette andtellsme how he got hislife back
together,bygoingbackto performingartscollege,workinghardtobreakinto musical theatre.He
saysthat he hada dreamrecently.“Iwasback on The X Factor. Simonsaid,‘Holdon,something’s
not righthere...’Andhe putme inOne Direction.Iwaspart of One Direction.We gotthrough,
endedupwinningthe show.Sellingoutarenas.Idon’tknow.”Ryan smokes.“Imagine.”
***
Robbie fromTake That, Charlie fromBusted:bothseemtosuggestthatcontentednessinaboyband
lastsabout twoyears.Thenyouget a bit bored.Studyfootage fromThisIsUs, for instance,captured
in2012 whenOne DirectionfirsttouredSouthAmerica,the five of themsweetlyawestruckastheir
van drivesaboutunderescort:“Lookat how manypolicemenwe’ve got!”Thencompare itwith
Louisand Zayn’sspliff video,recordedwhenthe bandwere backinSouthAmerica18 monthslater,
gettinghighina similarvanwhile unsuspectingmotorbike copsflankbeside:“There’sthe po-po.
One nil.”

11. One Directionwere seenleavingafestival inMayon charteredplanes –two separate planes,
membersdividingbetween.Some industrypeopleIspoke tooff-recordinsistedthere were serious
personal divisions,andweirdlythe waythe boysare arrayed onthe couchtoday happensto
correspondtowhat I’ve heard.LouisandZayn,bunchedtogetheronthe leftof the couch, are
supposedlythe naughtyclique.Harry,onhisownlittle protrusionof sofatothe right,existsata
remove.Niall andLiamare sandwichedbetween.Idiscussitwiththe band.Twoyearsago, when
theirdocumentarywasfilmed,theycame acrossas surprisedanddelightedtorealisetheywere still
mates.What happened?
Louis:“No,I mean,youonlyhave to take today forexample.Youknow,we’venotseeneachother
for abouttwo weeks.”Liam:“It’slike the firstdaybackat school!”Louis:“Exactly,we’re all really
excitedtobe here ...It’sfun.It’s fun.”
What aboutthisbusinessof differentvehicles?Whytravel separately,if it’sfun?Liam:“Ithinkthat’s
more a securitythingthananythingelse.”Niall:“Yeah,that’smore a securitything.”Liam:“If we’re
spreadout,no one can target one car.”
Liam leavesthiscuriousimage hanginginthe air.What am I meantto think?One Direction’scar,
hijacked,bazooka-ed,the lossof all five atonce?Iask if theyemploydoubles,look-a-likeswhocan
draw enemyfire.
“We’re actuallythe look-a-likes,”Liamsays,gesturingathisbandmatesonthe sofa.“We’re not even
the real deal.”
One Direction2010
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!D on the 2010 XFactor Live show.Photograph:KenMcKay/TalkbackThames/Rex
Our interviewisover.Ihandthema scrapbookmade over manymonthsbyElise and Frances.The
bandmust have takena thousandsuchofferings,butthey’re decentboys,andmake themselves
interestedandflattered.Igive themapresentmyself:acopyof Robbie Williams’book,inpartan
essential playbookonmakingthe transitiontoa soloist.Iputit onthe floor,intriguedtosee whowill
pickit up.Harry, the SexyOne,andthe favourite tomake a name forhimself alone?Zayn,the
MysteriousOne,whohasthe bestvoice?Niall,the Nice One,orLouis,the FunnyOne?Surelynot
Liam,the ResponsibleOne.Harryreaches.Liamgetsthere first.“Thanks,”he says,swipingitup.

12. ***
Epilogue:Isaygoodbye,write upourencounter,file mycopy.How honestwasmymeetingwith
One Direction,huddledupontheirspotlitsofa?Iknew the official identities(Funny,Nice,
Mysterious),buteventhose hadn’tfullytallied.Louiswasn’tfunny.Niall didn’tseemsonice,just
tired,coasting.Theywere all mysterious,inthe wayacollective cankeepthemselvesif theydon’t
say more than one or twosentencesbeforepassingontoeachother.
A weekafterthe interview,I’meatinglunchinacafe near my home whensomeone tapsme onthe
shoulder:Harry.He’sat a table across the room – do I want to join?We talkabout the interview,
howabsurdlyhotit wasunderthe lights.He mentionsplayingfive-a-sidethe nightbeforeandwe
trade storiesaboutthe firstfootball matcheswe wenttosee.Harrysays itwas the onlyplace hisdad
wouldlethimswear– a little six-year-oldStyles,gleefullydoing“wanker”signsatthe opposition
fans.
It’sa nice chat.Harry’s Nice.A reminderthathe’sone of the mostfamousmeninthe worldcomes
whena dude slinksover,cameraphonealreadyout,anddoesthe routine:“Youknow,youlook
familiar...Aren’tyouinthatband?One...”He asks for a photograph,sohe can senditto hisex-
girlfriend.“Iwantto make her jealous.”
I ask Harry howoftenthat happens.How manyselfiesinhislifetime,aroughfigure.The drawl is
perfectforhisanswer.“More times,”Harrysays,“than anyone couldcount.”We saygoodbye.Later,
it occurs to me to checkhow highthe biddingwentonthose collectedsamplesof the guy’svomit.I
can’t findthe eBaylisting,butIdo finda photographof the roadside site where the vomitingtook
place.A small shrine hasbeenerected:HarryStylesthrew uphere,10/12/14.
One Direction’snewalbumFourisreleasedonMonday.
Thisarticle wasamendedon15 November2014 to correcta factual error aboutauditionlocations.