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Explore - a closer look at wellbeing
- 2. ‘I am strong and I should handle it' ‘We are all the same and I should measure up’
- 3. Be Kind (To Yourself)
- 4. 37 He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the greatest and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbour as yourself.’ Matthew 22:37-39 (NRSV)
- 7. Set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.....do not neglect the gift which was given you....watch your life and doctrine closely.... persevere in them. 1 Timothy 4
- 8. Circle of Grace - Trevor Hudson
- 9. Positive circle of spiritual self-esteem… If only we would properly attend to God's gifts to us and in us! Then self awareness and healthy self love could form a positive circle of spiritual self-esteem and ultimately be a source of strength for others as well as ourselves. Will we have the trust to do this? Will we take the time? Wicks, R, (1992:25) Touching the Holy : Ordinariness, Self-esteem, and Friendship
- 10. Whose and Who Personal awareness of self before a loving God is also important because it helps self confidence to grow and be more resistant to the assaults of failure or rebuff. Thus, it allows our character to develop and it enables the presence of God with in us to be felt in a good way by others. Wicks, R, (1992:25) Touching the Holy : Ordinariness, Self- esteem, and Friendship
- 11. 2 5 Principles of self-respect and clarity: When I have made a mistake or feel anxious, I need to separate what I have done from who I am. When I feel badly about myself as a person, I must see if I am embracing an irrational belief about myself. 1
- 12. 4 5 Principles of Self-respect and Clarity: Since I am the one person I will have an intimate relationship with for my entire life I need to take care of myself at least as well as I would care for others. 3 I must be sensitive to irrational thoughts and willing to challenge and dispute them.
- 13. 5 Principles of self-respect and clarity: 5 I need to be aware of depression producing, personally devaluing styles of thinking .
- 14. Size distortion Negative contamination Awfulizing Being overserious
- 18. “Living …with a view of self that is any less than God's view of us, God who wrote our names on the palms of his hands, is unnecessarily tragic and sad. If we can remember this each day no matter how we feel or what is facing us, we can then be as spiritually audacious as God has intended us to be all along”
Editor's Notes
- Not experts and If dont know that now prob will by time we finish! But we are passionate to be the best we possibly can be, totally passionate about God’s purposes for his creation and the role we have been called into that within TSA. Certainly passionate about ministry. Retreat - recognise that many expectations - love the idea of creating an shared environment of learning. The bits I love most is the coffee and conversation! The sharing of resources that sustain us in ministry. The challenge and comfort of 3 Books, a film and an email!
- Over all framework – fullness of life that God wants us to enjoy, completeness, fully grown in Christ - As people called to love the least and lost – too often the person we are hardest on is ourselves? “Why haven’t you given up by now?”
- Two things – easily overlooked 1) Matt makes the great commandment integrated – love with all your being knowing and doing and the second is like it – love your neighbour as yourself. What if you dont? Either love your neighbour as yourself, or you dont love yourself.
- Wicks, R, (1992) Touching the Holy : Ordinariness, Self-esteem, and Friendship Our framework of discipleship, formation is essential if we are to love your neighbour as yourself, which is what it is to love God. Helpful book. Awkward places! He makes an imprt observation. How do we identify? What % us agree? “waste our energy not being kind to ourselves“ “the person we are hardest on is ourselves?“ Sometimes we need help? People to come alongside us.
- Wicks, R, (1992) Touching the Holy : Ordinariness, Self-esteem, and Friendship Our framework of discipleship, formation is essential if we are to love your neighbour as yourself, which is what it is to love God. Helpful book. Awkward places! How do we identify? What % us agree? “waste our energy not being kind to ourselves“ “the person we are hardest on is ourselves?“ Sometimes we need help? People to come alongside us.
- 3 things - Spiritual Direction? Let go of the past and what has happened / let go of the future and all that hasn’t happened and experience God in the present – which is the only place to look. The presence of now. How much time do we waste, prodigal are we with mistakes of the past, or with that which may never happen. Expose the trap of most of us get caught up in trying to be extra ordinary – 2 forms ‘wow and woe is me’ Fragments our completeness in Christ
- . Perhaps it is all in getting the circle of grace the right way around? Start with trust in God's revelation that we are made in the divine image and likeness a healthy self love from which flows our self esteem.
- Taking time brings perspective - Life is not about you – you are about life! Boa – gift of a phrase knowing ‘who and whose’ you are… Taking time brings us to the point of engaging with who and whose we are. Taking time helps us identify with which way around the circle we are going.
- allows our character to develop “If ‘life-as-usual’ has not been fertile ground in which God can bring change, the ‘life-as-usual’ must go” (Willard) – It is not that we forget or deny our faults; rather, we are better able to put them into perspective instead of being crushed by them.
- I need to take a distressful feeling as an opportunity to uncover style of thinking and believing that undermines my self-respect or desire to understand and correct my behaviour. **Know who and whose you are**
- =affirm my self-respect and model it for those whom I wish to help. Eg I must be perfect or successful all the time –ridiculous/ impossible. Related to if I make a mistake it undoes all that I have accomplished means I am a terrible and unspiritual person take steps to unconditionally accept myself and to help myself getting clarity and perspective in the same way as I would for someone else coming to me to empathy and support **Know who and whose you are**
- Some examples are: negative adding: because a few things of gone wrong I add them together and offer them to myself as proof that, I have a cloud over my head, everything is terrible in my life, I am a bad person a loser . **Know who and whose you are**
- : magnify unpleasant and minimise or dismiss the positive things. // allow one error, rejection, or unhappy instance to darken all other accomplishments or positive attributes. // make any event into something horrible rather than seeing it as annoying frustrating or unfortunate.// rather tease myself or exaggerate things until they are so ridiculous that I can laugh at them and myself, I actually believe that things are as bad as I think they are.
- Wicks talks about – but talking it through this is not excuse for lazy, or avoidance..
- good opportunities to practice clear thinking as a means of supporting self respect. pp77
- When we do this, the challenges we are anxious about may still appear but along with them the peace and excitement that come with a really risking to live the spiritual life will also overtake, cradle and warm us. Hope - "Optimism and hope are radically different attitudes. Optimism is the expectation that things-the weather, human relationships, the economy, the political situation, and so on-will get better. Hope is the trust that God will fulfill God's promises to us in a way that leads us to true freedom. The optimist speaks about concrete changes in the future. The person of hope lives in the moment with the knowledge and trust that all of life is in good hands."
- What has helped you? What resources? Key words? Concepts? What has been your experience