2. DEFINITIONS
• Emotion–a natural instinctive state of mind in response
to a particular event that is usually short in duration.
• Feeling–an affirmative state of consciousness resulting
from emotions, thoughts and desires.
• Mood– a state of feeling at a particular time.
USE. THIS. Put yourself in someone else’s place
–be more open and accepting of their
TIP. perspectives and needs.
3. THREE INTERCONNECTED PROCESSES
• Perception –how we see things.
• Cognition – how we label and think about what we
see.
• Emotion – physical and mental response to our
thoughts.
USE. THIS. Put yourself in someone else’s place
–be more open and accepting of their
TIP. perspectives and needs.
4. THREE LEVELS OF REACTION
1. Emotions begin as an instant bio-chemical
response to change.
2. Rapid bodily reactions to those bio-chemical
shifts.
3. Our conscious cognitive brain matches up
our internal state with the external context to
interpret these reactions and names them as
our feelings.
Try logging every emotion you feel
USE. THIS. throughout the day and spend time
TIP. reflecting on those emotions and the
information that each emotion
5. BECOMING AWARE OF FEELINGS
We Respond
An Event Occurs We Experience It Physiologically -
Feel Emotion
USE. THIS. Examine how you react to stressful
situations. Keep your emotions
TIP. under control when things go wrong.
6. BECOMING AWARE OF FEELINGS
We interpret
this arousal;
We we use the
We
An Event Response context to
Experience
Occurs Physiologicall decide what
an Emotion
y emotion
we’re
experiencing
USE. THIS. Take responsibility for your actions.
Apologize.
TIP.
7. THE SWINGING BRIDGE EXPERIMENT
USE. THIS. If your decision will impact
others, put yourself in their
TIP. place.
8. ---
HOW MANY
FEELINGS CAN
YOU NAME?
---
USE. THIS. Don’t advise, command, control,
criticize, judge or lecture others.
TIP.
9. TOP 5 USED WORDS
Word # of People
Happy 10
Sad 10
Excited 6
Depressed 5
Scared 4
USE. THIS. Take more responsibility for your
feelings.
TIP.
10.
11. FEELINGS AND MOOD
• Feelings are our way of noticing emotions that
interrupt cognitive processes and behaviors and
that require attention.
Good Mood Bad Mood
•Positive& Optimistic •Negative & Pessimistic
approach to things approach to things
USE. THIS. Become emotionally literate. Label
your feelings, rather than labeling
TIP. people or situations.
12. 4 WAYS – EXPRESSING FEELINGS
1. Identify or name the feelings.
2. Use sensory descriptions and make up ways to
describe how you feel.
3. Report what kind of action the feeling urges you to
do.
4. Use figures of speech as descriptions of feelings.
USE. THIS. Use your feelings to make decisions,
but don’t let your mood affect them.
TIP.
13. THE BIOLOGICAL MECHANICS OF FEELINGS
Stimulus Feeling Overt
Cognition Effect
Event State Behaviour
USE. THIS. Focus on the what you are feelings
as opposed to what happened.
TIP.
14. EXPRESSING FEELINGS
(1) “It hurts when you step on my legs, please stop it!”
(2) “I can’t watch the movie properly when you keep
asking me questions, and I don’t like it. I’d appreciate
it if you waited with your questions until after the
movie.”
(3) “Your singing is so terribly annoying, and I can’t stand
it anymore, please stop singing!”
(4) “Call me before you come over, it frustrates me when
I have to get ready in such a short time.”
USE. THIS. Show respect for other people’s
feelings.
TIP.
Emotions begin as an instant bio-chemical response to change, i.e., an instant positive or negative evaluation,which producesRapid bodily reactions to those bio-chemical shifts (diffuse physiological arousal – changes of breathing, sweat, muscle tension, etc.),which causesOur conscious cognitive brain – (the left frontal lobe) to match up our internal state with the external context – to interpret these reactions (even though they may have little or nothing to do with one another). And then to name them as our feelings.
The “common sense” model something happens outside of us we experience it we respond with an emotion
Stanley Schachterporposed the Affective Appraisal Model of Emotions something happens outside of us body reacts to the situation our conscious mind matches out internal emotion to the situation by calling up and naming a feeling. we experience an emotion
Strong emotions are re-labelled as sexual attraction when two condition are met:An acceptable object is present (a good-looking female)The emotion-producing circumstances do not require the full attention of the individual.The consious mind uses cues in the external environment to explain automatically triggered bodily sensations.Our brain is always trying to understand what’s going onIn this experiment, the brain misattributes the physiological arousal caused by the fear of a swinging bridge to feelings of sexual attraction toward a young woman who happens to appear in the situation.
Tell every person to write as many words that express feelings or emotions within 30 seconds.Ask them to count them and tell them how many they wrote down, they can read them as well.Many of us would only be able to name a few words out the top of our head, the English language has slightly less than 50 words describing various feeling states. But we can’t even name all of them, we are very emotionally limited and we tend to use the same few familiar words to express how we feel.
Doing this experiment on my friends I also found that what they wrote also reflected their personality. One of my very energetic and fun friends wrote many positive words such as “happy, excited, love, enthusiasm, and optimism,” and I was surprised to see that even though she wrote love she didn’t write hate although she was in somewhat of a competition to get the most words.
Feelings are our way of noticing emotions that interrupt cognitive processes and behaviors and that require attention.After the immediate intensity of the feelings as subsided, it usually lingers on in the form of a mood. We might have moved on to feeling something else but the biochemistry from the first reaction isn’t done with our body.Good mood – more positive, optimistic approach to things.Bad mood – negative, pessimistic, makes people look dangerous.When we do not pay attention to the feelings or moods we are in, they affects our opinions.When we notice them, our opinions are independent from the affects of mood and we have more control of the situation.
Identify or name it: "I feel angry." "I feel embarrassed." "I like you.”Use sensory descriptions that capture how you feel: "I feel stepped on.”Report what kind of action the feeling urges you to do: "I feel like hugging you." "I feel like slapping your face.”Use figures of speech as descriptions of feelings: "I feel like a pebble on the beach.”
The biological mechanics of fear look like this:stimulus event (threat) –> cognition (danger) –> feeling state (fear) –> overt behaviour (escape) –> effect (safety)
The right way is statement number (2).There are four steps to expressing your feelings correctly:Say what the other person is doingState how his actions affect youSay how you fell about itAdvise the other person of a better way to do so.
