This document discusses the importance of self-awareness and its relationship to developing interpersonal skills. It explains that self-awareness allows us to better understand how our own biases and beliefs influence our behavior and perceptions of others. The document also outlines different theories around how we develop conscious and unconscious beliefs about interacting with people. Finally, it provides suggestions for improving self-awareness, such as monitoring current behavior, reflecting on past patterns, and receiving feedback from others.

1. Awareness of self and others and
development of interpersonal
competence
Naila Khalida Fitriani 4520210097

2. Why self-awareness is
importantt
Our awareness of self is closely linked to our ability to
read the behavior of others, construct courses of action
and deliver an effective performance
This awareness offers the possibility of taking account
of known biases to reappraise first impression and
rehearse alternative ways of behaving
People who have a high level of self-awareness
understand how their own values, beliefs, and
subjective theories influence what they see and do

3. 3
Arygryris (1982)
argues that people
acquire, through
socialisation, two
kinds of theory for
dealing with
others ;
Two kinds of theory for dealing with others;
• Exspoused theory
• Theory in use

4. Espoused
theory
The first reflects the value and beliefs that are
uppermost in our mind and that we espouse to
others. They may also be theories that reflect
the vaues and beliefs of the people we respect.
At the conscious level, therefore, they become
the unquestioned and taken-for-granted basis
for relating to others.
For example, a consellor who has had a long
and rigorous professional training may espouse
the importance of always adhering to the high
standards of professional practice that were
part of that training.

5. Theory in use
Theories in use are the product of a prolonged
period of social conditioning and we are often
unaware of the extent to which this
conditioning influences our behaviour.
The consellor, referred to above, may, over the
course of her career, have modifoied her
working methods to cope with the pressure of
work and new types of problema. This process
may have involved many small changes.
The end result may be that her actual working
practice, reflecting her theory in use, is
differene from the theory that underpinned her
training and which she still espouses as the
most effective way of working.

6. 6
Covey (1989) argues that habits
are powerful factors in
determining how effective we are
because they can be both
consistent and unconcious. His
argument suggest that the more
we are aware of our habits and
our basic ‘paradigms, maps, and
assumptions’ and the more we
aware of the ectent to which
these habits have been
influenced by our experience, the
more we take our responsibility
for them

7. In order to raise our
awareness of how our
theory in use influences the
way we manage our
interactions with others;
We need to observe
ourself in action; by
reflecting on pattern
of past behavior and
monitoring how we
behave in the here-
and-now
We also need to
be open and
responsive to
feedback from
others.

8. Awareness of others
To be skilled reader of the
behaviour of others we need
to be aware of ‘who we are’
and how other people
perceive us

9. How to
Improve the
ability to
‘read’
others
Aware of the
kinds of
questions we
tipically ask
ourselves about
others
Aware of the
implicit
assumptions we
make about
how personal
carácteristics
are related to
each other
Aware of the
categories we
use to stereityoe
people

10. • Monitoring how we behave in the here-and-
now (observe how you are behaving and think
about gthe reason behind your actions)
• Reflecting on patterns of past behavior (in order
to identify habitual, and possibly unconscious,
ways of behaving)
• Being open and responsive to feedback from
others (because there are things we are not
concoius of)
ways to
improve our
self-
awareness

11. Individuals who are high ‘self-
monitors’ appear to be better able to
regulate their presentation of self to
fit with what they perceive to be a
desriable and approriate pattern of
behaviour tan people who are low
self-monitors
(Furnham, 1990)

12. Wicklund (1975)
differentiates
between subjective
and objective self-
awareness

13. Subjective self-awareness refers to our awareness of the sensations
associated with doing a task. When trying to ride a bike for the foirst time
we may be so involved in maintaining our balance that we give little though
to how we appear to others or to ourselves. If we notice that there are
other people observing us we may begin to think about what they are
thinking about us and how they are evaluating our performance. This is an
example of objective self-awareness. It is an awareness of ourselves as
objects in our own eyes and the eyes of others. For the purpose of
developing interpersonal skills it may be useful to work at improving the
lebvel of objective self-awareness

14. Summary
This chapter has considered how self-awareness
can contribute to interpersonal competence. It has
examined how it can affect our ability to read the
behaviour of others, construct courses of action
and deliver an effective performance.
There’s also some of the ways in which we can
improve our level of self-awareness;
• Mentoring our behavior in the here-and-now
• Reflecting on patterns of past behavior
• Being more receptive to feedback from others.

15. Source : Hayes, John. Interpersonal Skills at Work
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