This document compares raising a startup to raising a child through an investor presentation style deck. It outlines several stages that are similar for both startups and children, including the fun initial conception phase, the endless learning curve, how much surplus they consume through time and resources, and how you are never fully done and always wearing many hats. It also notes the importance of hiring the right people, testing and iterating, doing things yourself if you want them done, having a supportive tribe, and being ready for the hard work of emotional and physical change that is rewarding for the soul.