This document discusses how to build and maintain lasting love through respect, trust, and avoiding pride. It emphasizes developing humility, taking responsibility for one's actions, and meeting people's genuine needs. Maintaining chastity, overcoming guilt in a positive way, and strengthening one's testimony through faith and obedience are described as important foundations for relationships and personal well-being.

1. Happy Are Ye If Ye Do Them
October 31, 2010

2. Finding Love that Lasts

3. Love
Respect Trust

4. Without the foundation of respect
and trust, love cannot grow.

5. Respect does not require
agreement, but it does require
patience, kindness and boundaries.

6. Trust in relationships is impossible
without respect.

7. “It is better to be trusted than to be
loved.” —David O. McKay

8. Lasting, romantic love is impossible
without the foundation of
respect and trust.

9. “Love one another as I have loved
you.” —John 13:34

10. Respect honors sacred boundaries,
both before and after marriage.

11. “And that which doth not edify is
not of God, and is darkness.”
—D&C 50:23

12. Respect is always both affirming
and validating. It always builds up.

13. The Fortress that
Protects Love

14. Chastity is the fortress that
protects love—love of God, love of
others and of self.

15. Too often, our first impulse is to
pleasure not purity.

16. Keeping the law of chastity is
critically important to the stability
of all our relationships.

17. Chastity is first secured within the
boundaries of thought and intent.

18. Inappropriate images, real or
virtual, most often tempt men.

19. Inappropriate words, spoken or
written, most often tempt women.

20. High personal standards protect
us from temptation.

21. Those standards also encourage us
to keep the commandments.

22. Keeping the commandments
protects love and chastity.

23. Modesty in thought, word, action
and dress also protects chastity.

24. Standards
Commandments
Modesty
Chastity:
The Fortress

25. Pride

26. “Pride is a deadly cancer.
It is a gateway sin.”
—Dieter F. Uchtdorf

27. The night of sin is always preceded
by the dusk of pride.

28. Pride is the fruit of disdain–disdain
for others and for God.

29. Pride is self-deception and the first
treason against self.

30. Gratitude is the solvent that
dissolves pride.

31. You cannot feel grateful without
also feeling humble.

32. Humility opens the door
that pride closes.

33. Guilt

34. Guilt often triggers pride.

35. Guilt can provoke us to blame
others for our troubles and to
blame our behavior on others.

36. Guilt offers us two choices:
blame or personal responsibility.

37. Guilt is a call to positive action,
a call to positive change.

38. Two Paths

39. We have a choice between two
paths in our communication.

40. Those paths start with either
self-awareness and self-betrayal.

41. Self-betrayal
Pride
Judgment
Blame
Anger
Division
Dissolution
Hatred
War
Self-awareness
Humility
Patience
Responsibility
Joy
Unity
Resolution
Love
Peace

42. What path are you on in
your communication?

43. Unmet Needs

44. “Jesus saw sin as wrong but also
was able to see sin as springing
from deep and unmet needs
on the part of the sinner.”
—Spencer W. Kimball

45. Nothing speaks louder to a person
than their unmet needs.

46. Unmet needs speak louder than
laws, rules, commandments, those
who love us, the appeal of reason
or common sense.

47. We each must patiently discover
how to meet those genuine needs,
either for others and for ourselves.

48. In Malice Be Ye Children

49. Children bring us joy just
by being themselves.

51. “Whosoever therefore shall humble
himself as this little child, the same
is greatest in the kingdom of
heaven.” —Matthew 18:4

52. “Be not children in understanding:
howbeit in malice be ye children,
but in understanding be men.”
—1 Corinthians 14:20

53. Sin is despair, and despair is not
being willing to one’s true self.
—Kierkegaard

54. We cannot be completely at peace
without being our true selves.

55. Testimony

56. Doubt is the servant of neglect.

57. Testimony is always the fruit of
faith in action.

58. “And ye shall seek me, and find me,
when ye shall search for me with
all your heart.” —Jeremiah 29:13

59. Recovering from a
Personal Drought

60. We know what to do, but don’t
always know how to do it.

61. Observing our devotions to God
with real intent makes
all the difference.

62. Elder Yoshihiko Kikuchi’s
counsel to the Carey Idaho
Stake (Ensign, May 2007).

63. 1. Faithfully pay an honest tithe,
both young and old.

64. 2. Humbly hold regular individual
and family prayers.

65. 3. Devotedly have daily personal
and family scripture study.

66. 4. Thankfully keep the Sabbath
day holy.

67. 5. Gratefully go to the temple
often, there offering thanksgiving.

68. 6. Willingly sustain and
follow…leaders.

69. 7. Hold a…fast, including everyone
…who would like to participate.

70. The Master’s great success
formula from Hartman
Rector, Jr. (Ensign, May
1979).

71. First, believe you can do it.

72. Second, look to the Lord for your
blessings.

73. Third, make the sacrifice.

74. Fourth, expect a miracle.

75. And fifth, receive the miracle
with great humility.

76. In Conclusion

77. Respect, trust, and love
one another.

78. Overcome pride through
gratitude and humility.

79. Guilt is a gift to help us overcome
sin and weakness.

80. Follow the path to peace
in all your communication.

81. Be your true, best self.

82. Strengthen your testimony by
putting your faith into action.

83. Overcome personal drought by
yielding your heart to God.

84. “If ye know these things, happy are
ye if ye do them.” —John 13:17

85. God bless you all!