Mr. Birling is presented as a self-interested businessman in this extract. The extract focuses on giving feedback to improve an analysis of Mr. Birling's character based on pages 6-7. It provides tips on sticking to the question, embedding quotes naturally into paragraphs, using different word classes, adding transitional words, exploring quotes in more depth, and hedging statements with modal verbs to show doubt. Students are instructed to write an improved paragraph incorporating the targets and feedback.

1. Assessment Feedback –
An Inspector Calls
Write about the character of Mr. Birling and how he is presented in
this extract (Pgs. 6 – 7)

3. 1. Stick to the question
Write about the character of Mr. Birling and how he is presented
in this extract (Pgs. 6 – 7)

4. 2. Embedding quotes
• The quote should be surrounded by another sentence
• It helps quoted material flow naturally into your paragraph
• It should make sense when read aloud
A. This is shown by ‘our interests – and interests of capital’
B. The writer demonstrates this by speaking about Mr. Birling’s
‘…interest – and interests of capital’

5. 2. Embedding quotes
Tips
1. Give background and context for the quote – what is
happening or who is speaking
2. Only use the most important part of the quote. Don’t
go on and on
3. Read your sentence aloud – can you ‘hear’ the
quotation marks? You shouldn’t be able to

6. 3. Word Classes
• Noun
• Verb
• Adverb
• Adjective
• Pronoun
• Preposition

7. 4. Use transitional words (Conjunctive
adverbs)
Addition:
Additionally, Furthermore, Moreover, Also, As well, Similarly, Likewise
Giving examples:
For example, In particular, To illustrate, For instance
Contrast:
Conversly, On the one hand, On the contrary, In contrast, Yet,
However, Nevertheless
Conclusion:
In essence, In brief, In conclusion, To put it differently

8. 5. Explore quote in more depth
‘Our interests – and interests of Capital’

9. 6. Hedging
A. The writer is using the collective noun ‘our’ to show Mr.
Birling…
B. The writer could be using the collective noun ‘our’ to show Mr.
Birling...
• Use of modal auxilary verbs – shows doubt and that it is
possible, but NOT 100%
• Could, may, might, shall, should, will, would

10. Improvements Paragraph
• Using your targets and the class feedback, choose the
paragraph that you could improve the most and write an
improvement paragraph
• Under your assessment or on a new piece of paper, write
‘Improvements paragraph’ and underline it.

11. Homework
• Complete ‘An Inspector Calls - embedded quotes’
• Due Tuesday 26th April