This document provides guidance on writing documentary treatments and pitches. It discusses the purpose of treatments, outlines common treatment elements like loglines and narrative synopses, and offers tips on style and common mistakes. Students will pitch their documentary projects to the class and receive feedback to help strengthen their treatments. Effective treatments tell a compelling story through visual language and present a worthy subject, theme, and central question.

1. Week 5
SHANNON WALSH
DEPARTMENT OF THEATRE AND FILM, UBC
Writing a
Documentary Treatment

2. Pitch / Outline – OCT 18
• The PITCH is a pitch of your work in progress with
possible visual elements if you have any. You will pitch the
project to the class, focusing on elements of story, stage,
and character development. We will follow the model of
public pitching as done by some of the most important
documentary film festivals in the world.
• The class will be act as jury to give feedback on the pitch
and overall project with suggestions for going forward.
• During the pitch you can also request specific help with
difficult areas or feedback on specific questions.

3. What is a Treatment?
• A written expression of your visuals;
• It conveys the ‘mood’ of projects;
• Always go for STORY over CHARACTER when writing treatment
• Use free-flow writing to write down all the things you like about your
subject before writing
• Should read like a short story, as though we can ‘see’ what is
happening while reading
• Doesn’t have to be exactly what you’ll end up with, but it is an exercise
in IMAGINING what you will get, based on your research and
knowledge
• Only write a treatment once you have done most of your research.

4. Why write a treatment?
• Describe a project so that people involved
share an understanding of interpretation and
approach.
• Create a paper document that can help
secure funding, distribution, and other
resources.
• Provide guidance in the structuring and
editing of a documentary project.
• Get to know your subject better and really
work out what you plan to do
• Everyone wants different formats, so be
ready to write again and again in different
ways and lengths.

5. Treatment Elements: SUNDANCE
BRIEF LOGLINE In a concise 2-3 sentences provide a description of
your film that cites location, characters or subjects, mission and stakes
as applicable.
SUMMARY OF TOPIC (1-2 PAGES) Briefly provide contextual
information to acquaint the reader to the subject, advising why the topic
is critical and why such a film is needed now. Explain any global
relevance for the contemporary social issues addressed. Describe why
you are the best person to tell this story. Please be concise.

6. NARRATIVE SYNOPSIS (1-2 PAGES) Clearly communicate the story
your film will tell.
• Who are the characters and what is their journey?
• What might be different for them from the beginning to the end?
• What is the central question your film will answer?
• Consider narrative arc, point-of-view, and use of artistic elements.
Proposals MUST convey a vision for a finished film.
Development proposals that have not yet identified possible characters
or subjects, locations or are unable to unable to articulate the narrative
framework or the story’s central question will not be considered
Treatment elements

7. Elements of Effective Treatment
An effective proposal will:
• Tell a good story
• Make human truths emerge through images—not just verbal
description.
• Have a worthy subject and know your overarching theme
• Present a personal, critical perspective on some aspect of the
human condition.
• Inform and emotionally move an audience
• Keep it Simple Stupid!! (KISS)

8. NOTES ON STYLE
• Active, present tense, i.e. “This documentary tells the story of Bruce
Lee” NOT “This documentary will tell the story”
• Use visual language
• Tell the reader what they will see and hear on the screen.
• Describe the story and introduce any characters.

9. • Didn’t do your research
• Lack of specific and visual language
• Making it too academic
• Lack of a serious question, worthy subject, or overriding theme
• Didn’t find out other films already made on the topic
• Spell Check! Re-read, and peer readers
• “Acclaimed director Col Spector says that, along with not choosing a worthy
subject, not asking any serious questions and not choosing an overriding
theme are two of the most serious mistakes a documentary filmmaker can
make. Says Spector: "Before filming, ask yourself, what question am I asking
and how does this film express my worldview?"
Common Mistakes

10. Example I: “Eternity”
Ruth Ridley is the strong and feisty daughter of the preacher John Ridley. She sits in
the studio before a beautiful, stylised landscape of a sea at sunset. She explains the
influence her father had on Arthur Stace, who was later to become known as ‘Mr
Eternity ’.A photograph of John Ridley appears. It was Ridley ’s sermon, ‘Echoes of
Eternity’ which supposedly converted Stace to Christianity in the 1930s. It was after
this sermon that Stace took a piece of chalk from his pocket and wrote, in beautiful
copperplate script on the sidewalks of Sydney, the one word that would influence
many for the next four decades: ‘Eternity’.
The image of Arthur Stace appears, recreated, as he walks away from the Sydney
Harbour Bridge, wearing a dark coat and Depression-era hat.1920s archival footage of
two male swimmers, seen from overhead, lying on a cliff face. The turbulent sea hits
the cliff as the sea runs over their bodies. John Ridley’s poetic sermon booms loudly
as the sea returns to hit the cliff face.

11. Tag Line:
“Polley's playful investigation into
the elusive truth buried within the
contradictions of a family of
storytellers paints a touching and
intriguing portrait of a complex
network of relatives, friends, and
strangers.."
“Through a series of revealing
interviews, filmmaker Sarah Polley
investigates the truth about her
family history.”

12. Summary:
In 2011, Amina Arraf, a beautiful
lesbian revolutionary blogger in
Syria, captured the heart of Sandra
Bagaria. The fervent love affair that
developed between them would
sweep Sandra into an international
intrigue involving American secret
services, some of the biggest
media outlets, and countless
supporters of the Syrian revolution.
This is the story of an
unprecedented media fiasco that
Sandra was forced to live through,
and that we invite you to
experience with her on a journey
around the world.

13. In Development
“A Better Man is a documentary that compels us to
reconsider the root causes of violence against
women and expand our focus to include men, if we
hope to prevent violence.”
“The man who abused me when we were
teenagers is now taking responsibility for his
actions. One of the things he said was, ‘Attiya, I
wish I could have been a better man.’ I’m making
this documentary because I believe he, and
people like him, can change, and I want to create
a space for that to happen. I see our conversation
as a starting point to advance the movement to
end violence against women.”
– Attiya Khan, Co-Director
• http://abettermanfilm.com/

14. Proposal presents its argument rationally through the following kinds of
information:
• Length of work, format.
• Who is the intended audience?
• Goal or intended purpose(s) of the film
• Has any media work already been produced on this subject? If so, what is new, different, interesting,
engaging about your approach?
• Style (Any key stylistic elements in writing, shooting, audio, editing, etc.)
• What about the soundtrack? (Any music, narration, etc.—If so, who? what?)
• Who is working on the project? And what similar projects have they done in the past? (Credibility of
production team)
• How will this work be distributed? (Which markets, any distributor on board already?)
• Project history or current status of project.
• Historical background or context of the story
• Who, what, where, when, how, why?
“March of the Penguins”
Proposals vs. Treatments